Swipe Right for Orcs

Chapter 7

CHAPTER SEVEN

FAIRLIE

I need to leave here in an hour if I’m going to make it to the Drunken Goose to meet Osric on time. My room is a total disaster, like a tornado just ripped through it. Clothes, shoes, and lingerie are scattered everywhere, just as chaotic as my nerves. A frustrated sigh works its way up my throat as I scrub a hand down my face.

What the hell does one wear on a first date with an orc?

Do I wear jeans and a t-shirt? It’s a bar, after all, and we met online, so he could be a serial killer for all I know. Or do I go all out, something low-cut and sexy? I went for a pretty everyday look with my hair, curling it into loose waves that frame my face and for makeup I ended up doing a full face, opting for a dark smokey eye and a nude lip.

But what do orcs—or any monsters, for that matter—even find attractive on a woman? Does sexy come off as desperate? Like, Hey, fuck me, I’m easy?

Not that I’ve ever been the hard-to-get type, let’s be honest. But I’m fresh out of a long-term relationship and tonight, I just want to see where things go. Maybe I end up fucking an orc; maybe it’s a complete disaster.

I grab my phone and video call Merrin. Her face fills the screen immediately, her eyes sparkling with mischief.

“Oooo, the best kind of video calls—-the ones where you’re naked.”

I flip her off, laughing. “Stop, this is serious. I have no clue what to wear tonight.”

“What are our options? By the way, your hair and makeup are popping, babe.”

I flip the camera and show her the disaster that is my bedroom.

“Holy shit, babe. Were you robbed? Were they looking for the Gucci or the Louis Vuitton?”

“Very funny, asshole. I’m freaking out. Help me.”

She looks at the phone, her eyes darting around as she takes in the mess. I can practically see the gears turning in her head.

“Okay. Get the black strapless that’s hanging off the lamp and the little navy dress next to your dildo on the nightstand.”

“You’re sure? That dress is tight and see-through. I don’t want to look like I’m on my way to homecoming or something.”

She rolls her eyes. “Yes, I’m sure. Pair it with your black studded flats and call it a day. Is that all you needed?”

“Damn. That’s all I needed. You got a hot date or some shit too?” I ask, wondering why she’s trying to get off the phone so quickly.

“Nope, but I was in the middle of a pretty serious sexting session. Flesheater489 was just about to come, but I told them they had to wait for me. Only obedient playthings get to come.”

“You’re still moonlighting on that site?”

“It pays too well to stop. I don’t even have to send videos. It’s just texting and I make good ass money.”

I shake my head, grinning. “Alright, well, I’ll send you a pic when I’m dressed.”

“Peace out, bitch!” The screen goes black and I lay my phone down, quickly gathering the things Merrin mentioned.

As I step into the navy blue dress, shimmying it up over my hips, I take a moment to really look at myself in the mirror. The sheer, ruched sleeves hug my arms, and the lace corset bodice shows just the right amount of skin. The cold-shoulder sweetheart neckline is perfect, and my cleavage looks amazing.

Damn, Merrin was right. This dress is hot as hell, but not too much. Edgy rather than overtly sexy, it brings a surge of confidence as I slip on my black studded flats.

I give myself one last look in the mirror, running my fingers through my hair before checking that everything is in place. Satisfied, I grab my keys, take a quick selfie to send to Merrin, and head out the door, down to my old faithful Dodge Caliber. She’s not stylish or new, but she’s reliable and doesn’t guzzle gas like a cheap whore.

Twenty minutes later, I pull up to the Drunken Goose, my nerves kicking in as I take in the familiar neon sign flickering above the entrance. The building itself is nothing fancy—brick exterior, a few high-top tables outside where a couple of guys in faded flannels lean against the railing, beers in hand. A group near the door smokes lazily, the scent of tobacco mixing with the cool night air. The low hum of music filters out whenever the door swings open, blending with the occasional burst of laughter from inside.

I take one final glance in the rearview mirror, roll up my window, and smooth my hands over my dress, and step out of the car. With a deep breath, I walk toward the entrance, dodging a couple of smokers lingering near the doorway. The second I pull the door open, the warm, greasy scent of burgers and fries washes over me, making my stomach growl.

Here goes nothing.

I scan the bar, my eyes darting between groups of people and monsters, searching for Osric. Not to be an asshole, but he’s huge and green—how could I miss him? But as I continue to look around, there’s no sign of him. A small knot of anxiety starts to twist in my stomach.

Am I early, or is he ghosting me? I try to suppress the rising worry that maybe this was a mistake, that maybe I should’ve known better than to go on a first date with an orc I met online.

“You’re even more beautiful in person.” A deep, gravelly voice comes from behind me.

Spinning around, I'm met with a wall of muscle—a massive, solid torso wrapped in a black shirt that clings to every ridge and curve. My breath catches as I tilt my head back to take in the rest of him. Sharp jawline, high cheekbones, and those amber eyes—so intense yet softened by a hint of warmth.

“Osric?” I breathe his name.

He gives me a slow smile that sends my pulse racing. “Should we sit?” His voice rumbles through me, and when he holds out a large, calloused hand, I don’t hesitate to slip mine into it. His palm is warm, his grip firm but careful, as if he’s aware of his strength and is making a conscious effort to be gentle with me.

He leads us deeper into the bar, effortlessly parting the crowd as we go. When we reach an empty table, he pulls out my chair, his actions deliberate and almost old-fashioned, something I’ve never seen before from the men I’ve dated. They were all smooth and cocky, expecting something in return for even the smallest gesture. But Osric? He just does it, no expectation in his eyes, just a smirk as he pushes me closer to the table.

This is new—this feeling of being completely dwarfed by a man yet utterly safe at the same time.

“Thank you,” I murmur, trying to ignore the fluttering in my chest.

“You’re welcome,” he replies, taking the seat across from me, his gaze never leaving mine. There’s something in the way he looks at me—like he’s not just looking at me, but actually seeing me.

“I’m glad you came. I have to admit I was worried you wouldn’t show up,” he confesses.

“I was nervous,” I confess, surprising myself with the honesty in my voice. “But I’m here, and I’m ready to have a good time.”

As the words leave my lips, I realize just how true they are. The nerves that had been swirling in my stomach have settled, replaced by a growing desire to see where this night could go. There’s something about Osric—his presence, his confidence—that makes me want to throw caution to the wind and just... be.

Before I can say anything else, a bubbly waitress appears at our table, breaking the moment. “Hi, what can I get you guys to drink tonight?” she asks.

“I’ll take a Surfside lemonade and tea, please.”

“And you?” She turns to Osric, and I can’t help but notice the way her eyes widen slightly as she takes him in.

“Give me a Captain and Dr Pepper,” he says. His tusks, which I hadn’t really noticed until now, jut out just below his top lip, adding an exotic allure to his rugged appearance. It’s strangely captivating, and I find myself wondering what it would be like to feel those tusks against my skin, to have him kiss me and?—

Whoa, slow down, Fairlie.

“Perfect,” the waitress says, oblivious to the heat simmering between us. “Here are your menus, and if you want to order any apps when I bring the drinks, just let me know.” She hands us each a menu and heads to the bar, leaving us alone once more.

“So, what do you do for work?” I ask, trying to steer the conversation somewhere neutral, though my mind is still racing with thoughts of what it might be like to be kissed by an orc.

“I own a security company,” he replies, his voice steady as he leans back in his chair, his eyes never leaving mine. “We mainly do cybersecurity, but once in a while, we provide in-person security for large events in town.”

“Wow, that’s impressive,” I say, genuinely interested. “So, do you work from home, or do you have an office?”

“Everything is ran from my basement. It’s all state-of-the-art equipment, and my employees meet with me either there or virtually.” He pauses, then smiles. “What about you? You want to be a teacher?”

“Yeah,” I say, my heart warming at the thought. “I’ve wanted to teach since I was a little girl. Kindergarten through second grade, specifically. I love kids, and they’re so fun at that age—so impressionable.” I sigh. “I’m student teaching over at Amox Elementary, but I have the crabbiest and most old-fashioned mentor ever. I’m hoping to get a new class assignment.”

“Here are your drinks.” The waitress sets them down. “And are we ready to order, or do we need more time?”

Shit. I haven’t even glanced at the menu, too busy talking and staring at Osric like a lovesick teenager.

“I'm ready. What about you, Sweetheart?”

“Um, yeah, you go first,” I say, hastily opening the menu. “Let me just glance real quick.”

He doesn’t even look at the menu. “I’m gonna have the bison burger with everything on it, and can I have it rare with a side of chicken fries instead of french fries?”

“Absolutely,” the waitress responds with a smile. “And since you’re a monster, those chicken fries won’t be an upcharge since we know y’all need more protein.”

“I appreciate that,” Osric says, his tone polite yet commanding.

“And for you, miss?” She turns to me.

“I’ll try the chicken deluxe sandwich with cheesy hash browns,” I say, hoping I made a decent choice.

“I’ll get those orders in and food out to you as fast as I can,” she promises before strutting away.

As she leaves, I notice the way Osric’s eyes narrow at her before they flick back to me, filled with a hunger that has nothing to do with food.

“So, before we were interrupted,” he says, leaning forward slightly, his voice dropping an octave, “you were telling me about this rude teacher. Can you switch schools? Have you thought about Gateway Elementary? My sister works there as the head of the meal program. They might be interested in someone like you.”

“The monster-human blended schools weren’t on the list as an option yet,” I say, pressing my lips together, guilt tugging at me. It doesn’t feel right—they should have been integrated a long time ago. “I’m assuming it’s because integrating the kids is still new.”

“I could ask if you want?” he offers.

“Sure. I’d love to teach anywhere. It doesn't have to be just human kids.” I shrug, taking a sip of my drink.

We continue talking, the conversation flowing effortlessly between us. It’s easy, natural, and I find myself laughing more than I have in a long time. Before I know it, our food arrives and we dig in, the banter continuing as we eat. The night slips by faster than I expected, and soon I’m feeling that nice, warm buzz between tipsy and sober. Those Surfsides creep up on you. I only had three, but I’m feeling it.

Osric had taken a GhoulGo here, so he offers to drive me home to be safe. We’ve only just met, so it’s probably not the safest idea to let him know where I live, but something about him just screams trustworthy. And let’s be honest—if he owns a cybersecurity company, he could find out all this information on his own, anyway.

I’ve dated plenty of guys before, but none of them have ever made me feel this way. They were all so... ordinary compared to him. Osric is like nothing I’ve ever experienced—intimidating yet comforting, a contradiction wrapped in green skin and muscle. And the fact that he’s an orc, something I never thought I’d be into, only adds to the strange and undeniable attraction pulling me toward him.

He insists on paying the bill, and as we step outside, the night air wraps around us, cool and crisp. I point toward my Dodge Caliber, and we stroll over together, his heavy footsteps echoing beside mine. Unlocking the door, I slide into the passenger seat while he hesitates for a moment, eyeing the cramped driver’s side like he’s mentally calculating the logistics of fitting inside. With a low chuckle, he ducks his head and maneuvers himself in, his broad shoulders nearly brushing both the door and the center console.

I bite my lip, trying—and failing—not to laugh. “I never planned on having an orc drive my car, that’s for sure.”

He chuckles and starts the car.

We drive with the radio on low, holding hands, the silence between us comfortable. Too soon, we pull up in front of my building, and I’m disappointed that the night is over.

He cuts the engine and meets my gaze. “Can I walk you to the door?”

“Of course,” I reply.

Before I can reach for the handle, he beats me to it, stepping out and rounding the car to open my door. The gesture is effortless, but it sends a little flutter through me. Taking his offered hand, I step out, and together, we walk hand in hand toward my apartment.

When we reach my door, I fumble for my key, unlocking it with a nervous smile. Facing him, I muster the courage to speak.

“This is me,” I say softly.

“Thank you for tonight, Osric. You’re unlike anyone I’ve ever been with.”

His eyes meet mine, his gaze intense and searching. “Fairlie,” he murmurs, his voice low, almost hesitant. “Can I kiss you?”

My heart stutters, then picks up pace, pounding in my chest as warmth spreads through me, settling low in my stomach. A soft shiver runs down my spine, and my skin tingles where his gaze lingers. I nod, my breath catching in my throat as I step closer, every inch of me drawn to him.