13. CHAPTER 12
CHAPTER 12
Knock, knock, knock.
Jerking toward the sound in fear, Channing silently cursed himself for being so jumpy when his action caused Saleh to scamper under the bed whimpering. He had to find a way to get his emotions under control or he was going to end up raising a daughter who was afraid of her own shadow instead of the confident person she’d been before coming to Salvation.
Knock, knock, knock.
Frowning, Channing willed whoever was at the door would leave them alone. It wasn’t time for dinner, and they’d already eaten lunch. No one should be at the door.
Knock, knock, knock.
Whoever it was clearly wasn’t going to leave, damn it. Even though he wanted to reassure his daughter she was safe, until he knew who was at the door, he couldn’t promise that. He’d considered asking Yosi or Kylo to arrange to return them back to the island where they’d been found but he hadn’t been able to reconcile being completely isolated, with no one to talk to as the villagers usually left him and Saleh alone.
It had also been the consideration that if Saleh had ever gotten injured there would be no getting her help that finally convinced him to stay in Salvation. If he refused to allow himself to dwell on the fact that it had been Baz who reminded him nowhere was truly safe for either him or his daughter, who could blame him?
Knock, knock, knock.
Irritated that he wouldn’t be allowed to ignore whoever was at the door, he took the four steps that allowed his hand to touch the knob. Not about to open it blindly, he called out, “Who is it?”
“Braydon,” his friend called out. “I wasn’t going to come, but the kids wanted to see Saleh and with Karim on a mission, they needed the distraction.”
Frowning, he opened the door to find Braydon with Ellery, Zayan, and Maylee by his side. All four looked terrified, although Braydon was doing his best to keep it hidden from his nieces and nephew.
Even though Saleh had been under the bed, the moment she caught a glimpse of the three children, she scooted out and ran for them, easily darting away from Channing’s hands when he tried to stop her from stepping even one foot outside the room.
The giggles of all four children were impossible to ignore as they ran around the hallway. “Saleh, back inside.”
Damn if the confident, mischievous girl she’d been before wasn’t back as she took off running down the hall – away from Channing and their suite. “Saleh Lily Mercer,” he called out, but she just kept on running.
Terrified that she might be snatched before he could get to her, he raced after her as fast as he could. She might be quick, but his longer legs closed the distance quickly. The moment his hands grabbed her, she started screaming her head off.
He had no clue what to do to help calm her down, but his heart refused to stop beating like a jackhammer until they were safely back in their suite. Striding past Braydon, Ellery, Zayan, and Maylee, he didn’t stop until he dropped her into the playpen, he had set up in the living room.
Then he turned back to his friend. Gripping the door, he closed it partway. “I’m sorry Karim has decided to leave you all vulnerable, and that scares you, but Saleh has been traumatized enough and I don’t think having to comfort your nieces and nephew is good for her.”
Anger appeared in Braydon’s eyes. “Are you kidding me right now? How do you not care that our mates are putting their lives at risk to save other shifters who, like we had been, were captured, chained, and being worked to death.”
Before Channing could even process the fact that Baz might die, Braydon continued his tirade. “I fucking risked my life, the lives of my family to save you.” His friend stabbed his finger at his own chest as he continued. “I did that. Me. I knew it might be a death sentence for them,” he glanced down at his nieces and nephew, “but I did it anyway because if I hadn’t you would have died. You and your daughter. So fuck you if you think somehow having a child makes you more important than the rest of us, who are doing everything in our power to help instead of staying locked away in isolation because there’s a possibility of something happening.”
Braydon nudged the kids toward the stairway but before he left, he looked right into Channing’s eyes. “Tell me, what good does it do to survive if you’re afraid to live?”
All three children were crying as they walked away with their uncle leaving Channing standing there stunned as he listened to his child screaming her head off.
For a brief moment, Channing wondered if he’d been wrong to shut them inside their suite.
No. He’d do whatever it took to keep Saleh alive. Including rejecting his mate. If only it didn’t feel as if there was a hole in his chest.
Not that he would ever admit it, but ever since the moment Braydon had told him Baz was putting his life in danger to help others, Channing had been keeping an eye on the windows as well as ears open to listen for any sign that he’d returned. That had been three days ago. Three long, sleepless nights that had resulted in not having any clue if his mate was safe or not.
Would anyone even let him know if something had happened to Baz? Before Braydon’s visit Kylo had knocked on his door with a tray filled with food for breakfast, lunch, and dinner as well as a few snacks piled on along with the meals. The sweet man would attempt to make conversation, but other than pleasantries, Channing hadn’t encouraged him, nor had he allowed the man into the room.
Now? Now he still heard a knock but no matter how close he was to the door when it occurred, no one was there, just a tray on a table that had been set up for delivery. Because of that, he couldn’t ask if Baz was okay. It was as if the owners of Salvation had decided wasting their time on Channing was no longer worth it.
Were they right?
It hurt to realize they might be. No. It killed him to know he’d basically sent Baz into danger by not hearing him out. Hadn’t his mate deserved that much? Shouldn’t he have given him the benefit of the doubt?
Hell, he wasn’t entirely certain Baz had caused any doubt. The more he thought about each interaction they’d had, Channing began to understand he’d overreacted at every turn. That was most likely putting it mildly at that point.
Who the fuck was he kidding? Was kicking his own ass even possible? It should be. He’d really fucked things up.
Scooping Saleh up into his arms, he did the one thing that terrified him. He opened the door and left their suite. Nerves overwhelmed him, forcing him to take a deep breath when Saleh started to fuss. Inhaling as long as he could, he held the breath before releasing it slowly once more.
Feeling marginally better, Channing took a step toward the staircase that was about thirty feet from his door. Each time his foot went forward his heart beat faster. Refusing to stop, he kept moving. How? He had no clue.
It was more than tempting to turn around and head back into the relative safety of the room.
“Ba,” Saleh squealed happily.
Huh?
Then he looked up to find Baz standing at the top of the stairs looking stunned. No. There was also pure joy in those gray eyes that caused them to be brighter, lighter.
Not a word was said between them for several long moments, but Saleh didn’t have the same problem as she pushed hard against Channing to be let down. Why he complied, he couldn’t be certain, but somehow, he found himself bending until Saleh’s feet were on the floor before straightening once again.
Damn if he didn’t smile broadly when Baz bent down to pick up Saleh, who had run toward him at full tilt even though his gaze had never left Channing.
“Hey, princess,” Baz crooned as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. His mate even kissed her temple before murmuring, “I’ve got you, sweetie. You’re safe.”
Channing bristled for a moment at the mention of Baz making her safe. Yet, at the same time, how did he deny it? Channing had always considered that even though he’d always done his best to keep his daughter happy and healthy, Baz offered her a sense of peace and safety that she’d needed.
Yet where did that leave them? All of them?
Suddenly remembering why he’d decided to leave his room to begin with, he blurted out, “Are you okay?”
It wasn’t what he’d wanted to ask. Not true. Yes, it was. Sort of. Mostly. First and foremost, he needed to know Baz wasn’t hurt. But he wanted to say so much more.
Unable to stay away a moment longer, Channing moved toward Baz, who apparently felt the same as he strode toward him. It didn’t take much for them to be less than a foot apart. With Saleh in Baz’s arms, Channing could easily reach out and touch her, but he didn’t even think to do that as he only thought about being near Baz in that moment.
“I’m fine.” Damn if a slight dimple appeared when Baz smiled at him making Channing’s knees turn to rubber. “More than,” he added even as one of his hands continued to run up and down Saleh’s back, who appeared to curl happily against that big strong body.
Was it wrong to be jealous of his daughter?
“Good.” Why was this so damn hard? At the same time his body hummed with happiness that Baz was there, alive and smiling at him.
“How have you and this little scamp been?” Baz asked.
“Ba,” Saleh shouted as she straightened in Baz’s arms and touched his face with her hand.
Baz leaned in and bussed her cheek with his lips. “I’m happy to see you too, little one.”
He had no idea why, but tears flowed from his eyes as he watched the two of them connect as only a parent and child could. Guilt swamped him as he wished like hell he hadn’t been so selfish to keep them apart.