16. Fifteen
Fifteen
Sienna
S hit. Shit. Shit.
Damn it. Of all the days to oversleep, why did it have to be today? I mutter a string of curses under my breath, shooting a dirty look at my treacherous alarm clock. It didn’t go off. I scramble out of bed, nearly tripping over my own two feet in my haste. The twins’ homeschooling session was supposed to start seven minutes ago, and I can feel the onset of panic. As I bolt out of my room, the sound of the twins’ laughter hits me, and for a second, it soothes my frazzled nerves. I follow the joyful noise, my heart pounding with a mix of dread and anticipation. When I step into the living room, the sight before me makes me stop dead in my tracks. Toys are strewn everywhere, and there, amidst the chaos, sits Fabrizio cross-legged between the two kids. His hair is a mess, and he’s barefoot, still in his pajamas. His face is lit up with such pure joy that it takes my breath away.
I close my eyes for a moment, letting the sound of Fabrizio’s hearty laugh blend with the twins’ giggles. It’s like a melody that wraps itself around my heart.
“Ms. Walsh!” Flynn shouts, racing towards me and throwing his tiny arms around my legs before grabbing my hand. “Come play with us!” he pleads. Fabrizio looks up, his smile unwavering as his eyes travel up and down my body. He raises an eyebrow at Flynn’s sudden burst of enthusiasm. I hesitate, not wanting to intrude on their family time. But Fabrizio’s warm smile and subtle nod encourage me.
“Sure, what are we playing?” I ask, giving in. Flynn eagerly pulls me over to where Fabrizio and Maddy are seated, surrounded by an eclectic mix of dolls, toy soldiers, dinosaurs, and Lego pieces.
“We’re building Lego castles for Maddy’s stupid dolls,” he explains with a hint of disdain.
“Hey! They’re not stupid,” Maddy protests, her little face scrunched up in a frown.
“Flynn, be nice to your sister,” Fabrizio gently chides. Flynn shrugs as he lets go of my hand.
“You can help Dad. He’s terrible at this,” he declares with the brutal honesty only kids possess. I sink to the floor next to Fabrizio, laughing as he pretends to be offended by Flynn’s comment. As soon as I’m seated, Flynn skips over to his sister, making his dinosaur toy pretend to devour her Barbie doll.
For a few moments, I watch the kids play, feeling the warmth of Fabrizio’s gaze on my skin. It’s a peaceful, heartwarming scene that makes me forget my earlier panic. Finally, I look at Fabrizio, who’s still watching me. “I’m sorry,” I begin. “For oversleeping.”
“You probably needed the rest after last night,” he replies with a hint of amusement.
“Oh,” is all I can manage, blushing as memories of the previous night flood back. We sit in comfortable silence, surrounded by colorful Legos and toys. The children, lost in their imaginative play, occasionally interrupt my thoughts with another epic battle between a dinosaur and a Barbie. The scene feels almost surreal, an unexpected yet peaceful snapshot of a beautiful, if somewhat scarred, family.
A wave of sadness washes over me, my unfulfilled yearning for a family filling every cell of my body.
But then, Maddy’s high-pitched voice pulls me back to the present. “Can we play something else now?” she asks, her eyes wide with curiosity.
“But I’m not done with my castle for your princesses,” Fabrizio interjects, holding up a misshaped Lego cube with a proud smile.
Maddy tilts her head, thoughtfully placing a finger on her chin as she studies her father’s creation. I can’t help but laugh, the sound ringing through the air despite my hand pressed against my lips. “That’s anything but a castle,” I manage to say between giggles.
“What?” Fabrizio retorts, pretending to be offended. “I think I make an exceptional architect.”
“I think you should stick with,” I begin, pausing for dramatic effect, “one: your day job, and two: whatever else you’re doing.” My mouth hangs open in shock at my boldness. Did I really just say that?
Fabrizio throws his head back in a hearty laugh, the sound infectious. The cheerful atmosphere is interrupted by his phone ringing. He grabs it and leaves the room to answer the call, while I remain on the floor with the kids, continuing to work on my Lego castle. A few minutes later, Fabrizio returns, sitting beside me again. He opens his arms wide, motioning for the kids to come to him. Maddy and Flynn rush over, eagerly throwing themselves into his lap. He places a gentle kiss on each of their heads before speaking.
“Looks like I won’t keep you any longer from your daily lessons,” he says with a hint of regret.
“But you said—” Maddy begins to protest.
“I said we would let Ms. Walsh sleep in today. Postponed is not canceled,” he reassures them, patting them on the back. They reluctantly get up. “Now go and get ready,” he instructs. He stands up, offering me a hand.
“Are you going to be home for dinner?” Maddy asks hopefully.
“I will be, I promise,” he replies.
“Ms. Walsh promised to make burgers for us,” she informs her father, sparking excitement among her and her twin brother.
Their faces light up with pure joy as they skip out of the room with infectious energy. Fabrizio raises his brows, tilting his head in curiosity and amusement.
“I hope that’s okay,” I say, my voice wavering.
“Any special occasion?” he asks lightly.
“It’s just… they said they’ve never had them before,” I reply, searching his face.
“That might be right,” he muses.
“You’ve never taken them to a fast-food restaurant? A cinema? An amusement park?” I trail off, listing activities kids their age enjoy. Each suggestion hangs in the air, a reminder of the simple pleasures that fill a child’s world with joy.
“No,” he interrupts, his voice tinged with frustration. “By now, you should realize our life isn’t even close to the fairytale version of a family you’d probably imagine.” His features harden, the happiness I saw minutes ago vanishing. “But I make every effort to provide them with a safe, loving home. They want for nothing, and I love them with all my heart. That, at least, you might believe.”
Even though I know I’m overstepping, I can’t stop the words. “You're sheltering them too much. Kids need the chance to try things and make mistakes on their own, with your guidance, so they can learn how to navigate life. I can tell you're a great father and your love for them is clear. But keeping them from experiencing the world won’t—”
“You have no idea about raising two small children alone,” he snaps, his voice sharp. “I don’t need sympathy or advice from someone who doesn’t have children.” His words pierce me like daggers. Hot tears well up, streaming down my cheeks uncontrollably. Without thinking, driven by emotion, I slap him. The sting reverberates through the room, leaving tension in its wake. I back away, horrified at my behavior, while his expression remains blank. My lip quivers, my body shakes, and tears blur my vision. Fabrizio reaches out but stops midway, clenching his hand into a fist. The silence is deafening, a chasm between us. His eyes reflect a storm of emotions I can’t decipher. I can’t bear his presence. Wordlessly, I flee the room, my heart pounding and mind racing with emotion.