Chapter 6
Molly was sitting at her table in the dining room, blindfold on, heart racing like the clappers. It almost jumped out of her chest when she heard the scrape of the chair opposite. Following a rustle of clothing, she inhaled a wave of sophisticated, fresh-smelling aftershave that was vaguely familiar. Her stomach dropped as she realised it wasn’t one Duncan used.
Maybe it was all part of his new TV image.
‘Hi.’ Her voice was a squeak and she cringed. Duncan probably thought he’d been matched with a mouse.
‘Hi.’
What? She froze at the deep, gravelly sound. No, it couldn’t be. Neither life or her favourite TV show would be that cruel. One thing for certain though. The man sitting opposite her wasn’t Duncan.
‘Well, fancy meeting you here, whoever you are.’ It was a pretty weak joke, yet the silence that met it was surely unfair. At least she’d tried. ‘Err, there is someone sitting opposite me still? You’ve not scarpered at the sound of my voice, have you? I know it’s not the sexiest, and when I’m nervous I tend to ramble on a bit, but I’m kind of hoping you’re prepared to give us more of a chance. At least make it till the end of the meal.’
‘Molly?’
The bottom fell out of her stomach. ‘No. It can’t be you.’
‘I suppose that depends who you mean by you.’
Oh God, her mind was spinning so much she felt dizzy. ‘You’re my perfect match?’
‘Apparently.’
‘This is Ben, right?’ She asked, just to make absolutely sure she wasn’t in the middle of some nightmare she could wake up from.
‘I think we’ve established it’s me.’ The bone-dry reply was the final proof.
‘What we’ve established is that life is really doing a number on me,’ she muttered in reply, finally grateful for the blindfold so she couldn’t see him smirking at her. ‘I suppose you want an apology for the champagne.’
‘Why? I deserved it.’
That made her pause. It was hard to justify being angry with someone when they admitted they were wrong, because then she just sounded bitter. A woman so hurt she couldn’t let it go. ‘I’m glad you realise it.’ More silence. She tried to listen for clues. Was he jamming a hand through his hair? She remembered him doing that when he was frustrated, or annoyed.
‘I never meant to hurt you.’
The rough edge to his voice sent an unwanted shiver of awareness through her. ‘Well tough, you did. But I got over it,’ she added quickly.
‘I’m sure.’
And now she wished she could see his face. ‘Are you humouring me?’
‘I thought I was agreeing with you.’
Damn, he was tying her in knots. Or maybe she was the one doing the tying because he’d always unbalanced her. ‘The champagne was me letting off steam. Call it three years’ worth of pissed off, finally getting a chance to surface.’
‘So I’m safe from further drownings?’
‘That depends how much you piss me off while we’re here.’ She fumbled about for her wine glass, very aware her hands were shaking. Thank God he couldn’t see it. ‘So anyway, what are you doing in HEA Towers? I’d have thought a reality TV show was the last place you’d want to be.’
‘Would you believe, finding true love?’
‘That’s a big fat no.’ A plate was slid in front of her with a quietly worded ‘bon appétit’. ‘How are we supposed to eat when we can’t even see what it is?’
‘Take the blindfold off?’
She spluttered. ‘You can’t do that. It’s cheating.’
There was another long silence, and then she heard a quiet sigh. ‘You’re even more stunning than I remember.’
Heart galloping, she whipped off her blindfold, only to feel pinned to her seat by a pair of mesmerising eyes. A unique shade of hazel/green/tawny/brown/whole palette of autumn colours that she’d once been utterly addicted to staring into.
But was thankfully immune to now.
Just in case her heart forgot that important detail though, she dropped her gaze to the table. ‘You’re not supposed to do that.’
‘Compliment you?’
‘Take your blindfold off.’
‘But you have,’ he pointed out mildly.
‘Only to see if you had.’ He said you were stunning. How was she supposed to keep hating him when he wrongfooted her like that?
Duncan. She pictured him as he’d walked into the room earlier, and her mind settled. That’s who she was here for. The man who’d helped get her over the broken heart and shattered self-confidence Ben had left her with.
Frantically she glanced round the dining room, ignoring the cameras fixed in their direction.
‘Who are you looking for?’
‘I’m looking at the other men and trying to work out why I’ve been saddled with you.’
Finally she located Duncan on the other side of the room, sitting opposite … Jasmine. What the blazes did the blonde have that made her more suitable for Duncan than she was? Aside from a killer toned body.
Ben exhaled heavily. ‘I realise this isn’t ideal?—’
‘Not ideal?’ She stared back at the man she’d spent an unhealthy amount of time oscillating between obsessing over and hating. Damn him for looking even better than he had three years ago. His dark hair cropped shorter, emphasising cheek bones that seemed to have sharpened with age. He was model handsome, something she’d once enjoyed, but now resented. ‘Being shown to a table near the toilets isn’t ideal. Having to walk a mile home in the pouring rain without a coat isn’t ideal. This.’ She motioned between the pair of them. ‘This is a disaster.’
‘I see you haven’t lost your sense of proportion.’
Anger bubbled. ‘And I see you haven’t lost your love of sarcasm.’
Thankfully, whatever else he was about to say was halted as Rachel approached them, camera crew following behind.
‘I knew some couples would cheat and take off their blindfolds,’ she told them. ‘But I didn’t figure on it happening this soon.’
‘Ben started it,’ Molly blurted.
He let out a soft laugh. ‘Very mature.’
Okay, maybe that wasn’t one of her finer moments, but she’d always been quick to temper and he knew all the buttons to press. ‘Rachel, I’m sorry but there has to be a mistake. There’s no way Ben and I should be matched together.’ Again her eyes found Duncan. Both he and Jasmine still had their blindfolds on, no surprise there. Duncan loved this show. He wouldn’t do anything to break the rules. Jasmine was laughing and … her stomach shrivelled as she watched the blonde reach across the table to find Duncan’s arm. Then slowly slide her hand up and squeeze his bicep.
‘There’s no mistake, Molly.’ Rachel looked at her in concern. ‘I know you had a rather strong reaction to seeing Ben and I’m sure the viewers would love to hear your reasons behind that. I look forward to chatting it through with you both after the meal.’
Ben exhaled heavily. ‘Do we have to?’
Rachel gave him the sort of look a school head gave an unruly pupil. ‘Yes, Ben, you do. Having heart-to-camera time with members of the production team is a vital part of the show. And something you signed up to when you agreed to come on.’
Molly sniggered. ‘That told you.’
Ben simply stared at her, and shook his head.
She wished he wasn’t so damn good-looking. Or so tall, she thought later as they were led to the interview room after a stilted meal where neither of them had said anything beyond pass me the xyz, please.
Duncan was a nice height. Taller than her, but not so tall that she didn’t feel he was always looking down on her.
* * *
Ben was going to murder his sister. Yes, fine, she had gone through the contract with him; yes, he knew it was dating in front of cameras, but he’d figured he could sneak through it largely under the radar. There would be no chemistry between him and his match, no feelings involved. Just a bland few weeks of average dates, pretty much like the two his mates had tried to set him up with when he hadn’t paid attention enough to say no.
But there was nothing bland or average about Molly.
And talking to the film crew about her, about them, was going to bring back a whole raft of feelings he wasn’t ready to discuss in private. Never mind in front of a camera.
Rachel opened the door to a small lounge. Comfy-looking red velvet sofas, dark wood panels on the wall, a wood burning stove in the fire place, it reeked of cosy, intimate. Of lulling interviewees into a relaxed state of mind so they spewed their innermost thoughts.
His sister pointed to the largest sofa. ‘You’re the first pair to be interviewed as you were the first to take your blindfolds off. If you’d both like to sit down, I’ll go and find Natalie and the camera crew.’
‘Bloody great,’ he muttered, slumping onto the sofa.
Plonking herself down as far away from him as she could get, Molly smirked. ‘Not exactly your strong point this, is it?’
Even when she was looking at him with disdain, he found her way too attractive for comfort. Her hair was still glossy red, her skin had just the right amount of freckles. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Talking about yourself, especially about your, you know, “feelings”.’ She mimed air quotes. ‘I, on the other hand, don’t mind this bit. It’s healthy to talk things through, to get grievances out in the open.’
‘Grievances?’
‘Yes, you know, those nasty feelings of resentment when you think you’ve been treated badly.’
He flinched. He’d hurt her, he understood that now, but to imply his actions had been deliberate was grossly unfair. He didn’t have a chance to defend himself though, because Rachel was back, camera crew and the sequin-festooned Natalie in tow. He watched bleakly as they set up in front of them. Wide prying lens, terrifying-looking microphone. Whatever debts he might have owed his sister, their slate wouldn’t just be wiped clean, it would be scrubbed and bleached after the next four weeks.
‘So, Molly, honey,’ Natalie began. ‘I’m sure everyone is wondering why you threw your drink over poor Ben earlier.’
Molly made a sound of disgust, presumably at the show of sympathy towards him. ‘Let’s just say he had it owing to him. We used to date, three years ago, until he decided he’d had enough. The drink throwing was something twenty-six-year-old Molly would have loved to have done, if she’d had the chance.’
Ben had to make a conscious effort to unclench his fists. Had enough? Like he’d been playing with her feelings?
‘And what about twenty-nine-year-old Molly?’ Natalie smiled encouragingly at her. ‘How does she feel being paired with her ex?’
‘Like she’s been cheated of the chance to find real love.’ He wondered if she realised her voice caught on those last two words. ‘I’m open, smiley, friendly.’ She gave him a cutting glance. ‘He’s none of those things. No way are we a match, as our last experience together proved.’
Suddenly Ben felt the full intrusive glare of a camera on him. ‘And how do you feel, Ben? Are you happy being matched with Molly?’
‘Yes.’
Beside him, he was aware of Molly giving a jolt of in surprise.
‘Then why on earth did you ditch her?’ Natalie prompted.
His gaze flicked over Natalie’s shoulder to where Rachel was standing, watching, and all those years when he’d wanted to pull her hair as a boy came flooding back to him. ‘I had my reasons,’ he answered tightly.
‘Will you share them?’
Again he glanced at Rachel, who at least had the grace to look uncomfortable. She knew damn well he wouldn’t want to talk about that time in his life. ‘No.’
Beside him, Molly started to laugh, but it lacked any of the warmth he remembered. ‘Why am I not surprised? Good luck getting him to tell you anything. He doesn’t communicate.’
Again, he felt her words slice through him. He found it hard to articulate his feelings but that didn’t mean he didn’t have any. Yet along with the hurt was a heavy dose of guilt. And the oppressive weight of failure. If he’d been better at communicating, things with Helena could have turned out differently.
‘Well, there certainly seems to be a lot of unresolved tension between the pair of you, so I’ve got a question for you both. One that’s very important for the sake of the show.’ Natalie’s gaze swivelled from Molly to him. ‘Are you prepared to give your relationship another chance?’
‘Yes.’ He knew Molly. If he could get her to forget the fact she hated him, perhaps they could enjoy each other again, like they had before. Until he’d called things off, wracked with fear, with guilt. With the overwhelming knowledge that he wasn’t ready to give her what she needed.
At the very least, being paired with Molly on the show would make this whole nightmare slightly less painful. He didn’t need to pretend with her. She’d already seen him at his worst.
‘If I say no, does that mean I’m out of the show?’
Molly’s question made him smile grimly. ‘I’m the better of the two evils?’
She ignored him. ‘Couldn’t you swop us round instead? Give us new partners?’
Natalie looked over at Rachel, who gave a single shake of her head. Ben recognised the look on his sister’s face. It was the same one she’d had when they were kids and she’d realised she’d found a way to beat him at Monopoly.
‘I’m getting a firm no for that request, honey.’ Natalie chuckled. ‘And to be honest, I don’t think our viewers would ever forgive us if we deprived them of the opportunity of more fireworks between the pair of you.’
Molly let out a dissatisfied huff. ‘Then I guess I’ll have to stick with Ben for two weeks.’
‘That’s excellent news.’ Natalie beamed and behind her, Rachel signalled the end of the interview – sorry, heart-to-camera time.
Dismissed, he followed Molly out, but not before giving his sister a hard glare.
‘I thought this was for a month,’ he murmured.
Molly whirled round to face him. ‘Do you know anything about the show you signed up for?’
‘I know you and I will be seeing more of each other while we’re here.’ And despite her anger towards him, he realised he was looking forward to it. He’d meant what he’d said earlier, when she’d drowned him in champagne. Going out with her had never been dull.
‘I can’t avoid our dates, but I can avoid seeing you in between them.’ She flicked her hair over her shoulder. ‘And in two weeks I can swop partners.’
‘Stick or ditch,’ he murmured, reciting the awful catch phrase.
She glared at him. ‘So you are aware of the rules.’
He was stuck in a place he felt uncomfortable, with a bunch of people he felt uncomfortable with. And the one person who could turn this hell hole into something at least bordering on pleasant, hated him. ‘I’m aware that we’re going to have to spend time together. Either we do that as enemies, or we find some way to be civil to each other.’ He frowned, eyes searching hers for some of the warmth he’d once received. ‘I remember a time we used to enjoy each other’s company.’
She blinked and looked away. ‘I remember that time, too.’ Her face turned back towards his. ‘But while I was thinking we were going to have this grand love affair, you were deciding you didn’t want my company anymore.’
‘That’s not true.’ Frustrated with how she was making it sound, he shoved his hands in his pockets. ‘It wasn’t a question of not wanting to be with you. More that I couldn’t be with you. Not feeling as I did at the time.’
‘It’s fine. I’m not everyone’s taste, I get that. It’s just I expected to have a sense that you thought we weren’t clicking, though that was probably stupid of me.’ He watched as she swallowed, and remembered how soft her neck was. How she loved to be kissed there. How she giggled when he trailed his kisses higher, to behind her ear. ‘You blindsided me, Ben, and I thought I was done being blindsided. I won’t let it happen again.’
He nodded, aware nothing he could say would help improve her opinion of him. He’d had his chance, and he’d stepped away from it, too scared, too emotionally rung out to risk it. His punishment was being stuck on a TV set with a bunch of strangers and a camera crew, the only people he wanted to talk to either hating him, or content to see him suffer because it made good television.
Damn it, one mistake didn’t make him a bad person though, he reminded himself as he trudged away in the opposite direction to Molly. Maybe the next few weeks would give him a chance to prove that to her.
If he hadn’t been thrown out before that, for strangling the associate producer.