Chapter 27
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Joshua
“ I ’m glad you’re here,” I whisper in Gia’s ear as we sit side by side at the long, noisy table. Christmas is being hosted by Serena and Alesso this year, and everyone is here including Gia’s family. The Salerno house is also on the grounds of Ben’s vast estate, which is handy because it means everyone can stay over. Gia, Gia’s parents, and her siblings are staying at Mom and Leo’s house, so I’m hoping for a sleepover of our own.
Gia’s assignment is all but over, and she’ll be moving permanently into one of Mom’s guest rooms in a few days. I’ll feel more at ease when I know she’s safely tucked away here. I’m going to help her pack up her stuff when we get back to the city in a few days.
Dinner is a lively affair, filled with tons of delicious food, expensive wines, and lots of laughter. But it’s the girl sitting at my side that makes it the most special. I’m done denying my feelings for Gia and done denying myself what I want. The situation is still critical with the threat looming over us, but I’m refusing to think about mafioso bullshit today.
Today is about family and making new memories with the woman who has come to mean so much to me.
“Here, Mom. I forgot to give these to you earlier,” I say, creeping up on her in the living room after the men and kids have finished with the cleanup. I hand her the box of chocolates I picked up at the White Plains Chocolaterie. They are her favorite.
“You are really spoiling me, Joshua. You and Caleb have already given us too much!” We gave them a cruise trip to Italy with a babysitting voucher so they can enjoy a romantic vacation together. Caleb and I will split the time in half and clear our schedules so we can be out here to take care of Leif and Rosa. It won’t be a chore. I don’t get to spend enough time with my little brother and sister, and I’m already looking forward to it.
“You’re our mom, and we love you. Nothing will ever be too much.”
Tears glisten in her eyes as she pulls me into her arms. “She is so good for you. She’s bringing you back to life,” Mom whispers in my ear.
I haven’t said a peep to anyone about the status of my relationship with Gia, but I guess it’s probably obvious by now. We were practically sitting on top of one another at dinner and grinning like lovesick loons.
“I’m thrilled for you.” She grips my arms. “You deserve all the happiness in the world. Embrace it, my love.” She kisses both my cheeks, smiling as she swipes at the tears in her eyes.
“Look what I found!” Raven shrieks, waving a sprig of mistletoe in the air. Her eyes scan the room, settling on Marco Bianchi with determination.
“Here comes trouble,” Gia murmurs, grinning as she sidles up next to me.
My arm wraps around her waist of its own volition. Mom practically floats off the ground. Across the room, I spot Frankie whispering to her husband and smiling as she looks in our direction.
“Does Ben know his little princess is crushing on Gia’s brother?” I ask Mom, chuckling as I watch Raven dangle the mistletoe over Marco’s head. At eleven, she is almost as tall as he is at thirteen.
“Oh, he’s aware, and he’s not happy.” Mom smiles. “Raven will always be his little girl even when she’s all grown up. She reminds me of Elisa at that age.”
“I’d better warn my little brother,” Gia teases, leaning into my side. “Though he’d be lucky to have Raven adore him the way Elisa adores Caleb.”
“She’s far too good for my brother.” I’m only repeating what Caleb has said so many times, but Mom’s not happy.
“Stop that.” She playfully swats my chest. “Your brother is a catch. If he’d only allow himself to believe he’s worthy of love and happiness, Elisa could be the best thing that’s ever happened to him.”
I’m tempted to ask if she knows he got the snip, but it’s not my secret to share.
“Poor Marco.” I’m chuckling as I watch him trying to avoid a mouth kiss, but Raven is a determined little thing and way more forthright than Elisa has ever been. She’s going to be a complete stunner when she’s grown up, and Marco most likely will not be ignoring her then. His cheeks stain red when Raven gets her way, planting a quick kiss on his lips. Thank fuck Ben isn’t in the room. He’s off somewhere with Alesso and Leo. Those three are thick as thieves. Have been for years.
“Marco is super shy,” Gia admits. “But he’s the best of us.”
The mistletoe makes its way to Frankie and her husband Rico. He dips her down low, supporting her with one arm around her back, while holding the mistletoe over their heads. It’s quite an amorous display, and catcalls and wolf whistles ring out.
“Get a room,” Cosimo shouts, and his parents break their passionate lip-lock with wide smiles on their faces.
Rowan and his girl have a turn next, and then I snatch the sprig and turn to Gia, hoping she is game to do this. I press my mouth to her ear. “Is this okay?”
Her big blue eyes widen as she stares at me. “You’re sure you want to do this? There will be no coming back from it.”
“I don’t want an out.” My expression turns solemn, and my heart is beating like crazy behind my chest as I ask my next question. “Do you?”
She rigorously shakes her head, sending waves of reddish-brown hair tumbling over her shoulders. She’s decided to let the dye naturally fade, rather than getting the color stripped. “Nope. I’m all in, Joshua.”
My shoulders relax. “I’m all in too.”
She beams at me, and I grin back at her. This feels surreal. Like it’s happening to someone else. If you’d told me last Christmas I’d fall in love with Gia Bianchi, I would have asked what you were smoking. I never could have predicted this.
“Kiss her already!” Rowan yells.
“Yeah, Joshie. Kiss her,” Leif adds, and a chant of “kiss her” starts up around the room.
“Don’t want to disappoint our audience,” I say, reeling her into my arms as I elevate the plant over our heads.
“Definitely not,” she agrees, winding her arms around my neck. “And we need to one-up my parents. Can’t let the rents steal our thunder.”
“Mission accepted,” I say, leaning down to kiss her. Our mouths melt in a scorching-hot kiss as we cling to one another with burning intensity. I prod at the seam of her lips with my tongue, and her mouth parts, granting me entry. Our tongues glide sinfully against one another like we’ve been doing this our entire lives. We’re so lost to the moment that our surroundings fade. Gia jumps up, wrapping her legs around my waist as I toss the mistletoe away and hold her upright.
“Ahem.” A loud throat clearing finally pulls us apart as whistling and giggling bounces off the walls. I stare at Rico Bianchi’s red face. His nostrils are flared, and his hands are clenched at his side. Oops. “There are kids in the room, and that’s my only daughter.”
“I’m aware.” I bundle Gia in my arms as I spot Caleb and Elisa watching us from opposite sides of the room. Elisa has a smile on her face, but it’s tinged in sadness, and Caleb looks miserable. I frown, wondering what is going on there. Elisa didn’t sit beside Caleb at dinner, which basically never happens. I eyeball my twin, and his unhappiness is glaringly obvious.
“Relax, Dad.” Gia punches him in the upper arm. “We got a little carried away, but there’s no need to get your panties in a bunch. We’ve seen you and Mom do way worse.”
“Take a chill pill, Rico.” Frankie loops her arm through her husband’s. “They’re in love. Leave them be.”
Mention of the L-word doesn’t induce the panic-riddled fear it usually would, but I’m not wholly comfortable either.
“We’re going for a walk,” Gia announces, dragging me away. “Sorry about them,” she whispers, “I know they’re a lot.”
“I like your parents. They’re cool.” I’m distracted watching my twin.
I peck her lips. “Wait by the side door. I just need to have a quick word with Caleb. I’ll meet you there in five.”
I spot Elisa making a beeline for Gia as I walk across the room to my twin. “What’s going on?” I ask, lifting one shoulder and gesturing toward the corner of the room away from prying ears.
“It’s nothing for you to worry about. Go be with your girl.”
“Caleb.” I pierce him with a knowing look.
Air whooshes out of his mouth, and we walk over to the corner. “It appears I’ve done something to upset Lili. She won’t talk to me or tell me what it’s about.” He shrugs. “It’s probably for the best. Things were becoming…complicated.”
“We’re definitely talking about this, but I’ve got to go. Gia is waiting. I can ask her if she knows anything?”
He shakes his head. “Don’t get involved.” He clamps his hand on my shoulder. “You two look good together. Don’t fuck it up.”
I grab him into a hug. “Love you, little brother.”
“Fuck off. We were still born on the same day.”
My grin is off the charts. “I still entered the world first.”
He shoves his middle finger up at me, and I’m laughing as I walk off to meet my girl.
“Hey there, beautiful.” I lean down and kiss her.
“Hey, that’s my line!” she quips.
I nip her earlobe before she pulls a wooly hat down on her head. I cover up in a warm coat and scarf, and I remember gloves this time. We leave the house and set out on the walking trail, hand in hand. The air is brisk, lifting strands of Gia’s hair, but it’s not unpleasant. A warming heat filters through my veins that is all Gia’s doing.
“Are you having a good day?” I ask, lifting our conjoined hands to my lips and kissing her knuckles through her gloves.
“This is the best Christmas I’ve enjoyed in a long time.”
“Me too.”
“Please tell me you’re feeling this. That I’m not alone in it.”
“I’m feeling it all over, honey. All over.” I waggle my brows, and she giggles as she snuggles into my side. My arm encircles her shoulders, like it was made to fit there.
“I want to spend the night with you.” She looks up at me with a look that is a mix of vulnerability and confidence.
“I would love that.”
A gorgeous smile ghosts over her lips, and I can’t help swooping in and claiming them.
“Oh, Joshua,” she rasps when we finally break apart. Her hands land on my chest. “I could kiss you all day and all night and never grow tired of it.”
“I plan to keep kissing you for a long time, Gia. You won’t get a chance to grow tired of it.”
Her eyes probe mine. “You mean that.”
“I do. I told you I’m all in, and I’m serious.”
“So, we’re like…” She swallows audibly and worries her lower lip between her teeth.
“Boyfriend and girlfriend doesn’t quite seem enough, but it’ll do for now if that’s what you want.”
“It is,” she rushes to reassure me.
Our lips meet again, like two magnets drawn together.
“We better stop,” she says in a breathy voice. “Before I push you into the woods and have my wicked way with you.”
“I’m not opposed to outdoor fucking, but I’d rather my dick didn’t shrivel from frostbite.”
She giggles, taking my hand and dragging me to the bench. “I need to talk to you about something.”
“Cristian,” I surmise, circling my arm around her and keeping her tucked in close.
She nods. “I would always have told you before we slept together, so don’t think this is because Cristian said I needed to tell you. I would not have kept it from you.”
“Yet you did when I asked before.”
“You were an ass to me then, and you had no right to any part of my personal life. Things are different now.”
“Did you fuck him?” I hold my breath, waiting for her answer.
Slowly, she nods, and I try to get a grip on my emotions.
“I thought he might have said something to you.”
“Cristian is a gentleman. He never divulges details, and he hasn’t said anything about you, not even when I asked him.”
“Then I’m glad I did it with him.”
I frown.
“I lost my virginity to Cristian when I was seventeen,” she quietly admits.
Removing my arm from around her body, I rest my head in my hands. “He means something to you.” A girl like Gia doesn’t just give her virginity away flippantly.
“It’s not what you’re most likely thinking.” She places a palm on my back. “It actually wasn’t planned. I was a couple months away from graduating, and I didn’t want to go to college a virgin. I had been planning to lose it with my boyfriend at the time, but we broke up. I was at a Maltese party, and Cristian was there. We got talking, and he’d just broken up with someone too. We flirted a bit, and then one thing led to another.”
“Was that the only time?”
“Yes.”
I’m battling with a whole slew of emotions. “He better have made it good for you.”
“He took care of me. He made my first time memorable, and it was only special because it was my first time. I don’t have feelings for him, and he doesn’t have feelings for me. It was a onetime spur-of-the-moment thing.”
“Okay.” I lift my head.
“Are you mad?” She nibbles on her lower lip.
I shake my head. “I’d be a prick to be mad about something that happened years ago before I was on the scene.” I expel heavily. “I’m jealous, Gia. He got to be your first.”
She wets her lips a few times, opening and closing her mouth.
“Just say what’s on your mind.”
Fear flickers across her face briefly before her head lifts and her shoulders straighten. “You could be my last.”
I hold her stunning face in my hands. “I could be.” I move to stand, needing to make love to her now.
“Wait a sec. I have something else to tell you.”
I groan. “Fuck. I’m not sure my heart can take this.”
“I always want to be brutally honest with you, Joshua. Not just because of what you’ve been through in the past, but I believe all relationships need to contain complete honesty from the very start. I don’t want you caught off guard by someone saying something to you. I want you to have the full facts.”
“How are you only twenty-two? How are you so wise?”
“I’ve learned from the best. My parents have an amazing relationship built on open communication, trust, respect, and loyalty. I want that for me. For us.”
“I’ve seen that with Nat and Leo too, and it’s what I want. I need it after what Ina did to me. I don’t trust easily, Gia, but you have effortlessly woven your way into my heart.”
“Are you still afraid?”
“Yes, but the best things in life are scary.”
She kisses my cheek. “I agree.”
“I should probably tell you the names of the girls I’ve slept with as all are mafioso , and I don’t want you caught off guard either.”
“I don’t need to know the names of everyone, Joshua, but if it makes you feel better, then absolutely tell me. I’ll try not to be jealous.”
I reel off the names, and she listens quietly. “I thought there would’ve been more,” she says when I’ve finished.
“Gee, thanks.”
She sits closer, and our thighs press together. “Your reputation makes it seem like it’s more.”
“I think people confuse me with Caleb a lot.” I shrug. “What was it you wanted to tell me because I’m eager to move this to the bedroom.” I purposely brush my lips against her earlobe as I lean in. “I have fantasized about making love to you for months, and I can’t wait a minute longer to get my hands on you, so make it quick.”
“God, Joshua. The things you do to me with just your words.” A full-body shiver crawls over her, and I don’t think it’s anything to do with the cold.
“Stop deflecting.”
“I’m nervous. I’m worried you might think differently of me after I tell you this.”
“Impossible.” I tweak her nose. “Now spill.”
“I’ve had a foursome. Multiple foursomes.”
“Okay, wasn’t expecting that.” I tuck a stray strand of hair back into her hat. “Three girls and a guy or…”
She smooths a hand over her head. “Me and three guys.”