Chapter Forty-Four
I came inside her and I lost my shit.
Her legs around my waist, her body shaking, her pussy clamped down on my dick and I fucking lost it.
I couldn’t even think of a single damn thing to say to her.
I just fucking stared. A part of me didn’t even want to believe the possessive, twisted shit going through my head. I wasn’t this guy. I didn’t keep women. I didn’t fall at their feet. I wasn’t beholden to a damn thing except the memory of my brothers, but this woman…. Jesus Christ, I didn’t have the words.
All I knew was, I was going to do my damndest to keep her. Which meant I had to fucking say something after taking her like a damn animal on the kitchen table in a client apartment at work. She was too classy for this shit.
I stroked her soft cheek with my thumb. “You okay?”
“Yes.” She grasped my wrist. “Are you?”
“Never better,” I lied, touching my lips to hers once. “Pulling out, sweetheart.”
“Okay,” she breathed, her voice going soft as her cheeks flushed.
Jesus. “You’re beautiful, you know that?” Reluctantly I slid out.
Sucking in a sharp breath, she bit her bottom lip.
Fuck. Fuck. Pulling her up, I took her face in both hands. “I should apologize, but I’m not sorry for being inside you.”
“You don’t have to apologize for something I asked for.”
“Is that right?” I let the corner of my mouth tip up. “You were asking for it?”
No smile, her tone serious as fuck, she didn’t hesitate. “From you.”
Damn . I didn’t lie. “I like the sound of that.” But I wasn’t letting anything go between us that wasn’t crystal fucking clear. “As long as it’s only me, sweetheart. That’s how this is gonna work. You feel me?”
Her head ducked, but she didn’t say shit.
I tipped her chin. “Words, baby.”
Her sexy as hell dark eyes found mine, then she threw me. “Why couldn’t I talk after…” She inhaled. “After you came for me?”
“Trauma affects everyone differently.” I’d seen that shit enough times downrange to know it was never predictable, and it sure as fuck wasn’t selective. “The mind will protect itself however it can.”
“You didn’t seem… fazed by it.”
“I’ve seen it before, babe. It wasn’t permanent and I wasn’t gonna call you out on something you had no control over. You just gotta ride that shit out when it happens.”
Her voice quieted. “Is that what you do?”
Suddenly uncomfortable as fuck, I changed the subject. “You ready to get out of here?”
Her backbone, unassuming and classy, came out. “Yes, when you answer my question.”
Fuck. Dropping my hold on her and rubbing a hand over my face, I sighed. “No, I don’t ride shit out. I get angry and I shoot my fucking way out.”
“I don’t think that’s a long-term solution.”
No fucking kidding. “I know.”
“Okay.”
I eyed her. “Okay, what?”
“I feel you,” she said simply.
Jesus fucking Christ, this woman. “Took you a while to get there,” I challenged, fighting a smile.
“I was already there. I had questions.”
“So do I, plenty, but you’re still not giving me the goods.” She needed to tell me I was it for her. For now, for as long as this lasted, for as long as she was going to put up with me, whatever fucking path, she needed to tell me she understood.
She gave me her shy smile. “I thought you already had the goods?”
My dick got hard again. “Watch it.”
“Or?” she challenged like a goddamn goddess.
“We’ll break in the counter in about two point five seconds.”
The smile wiped clean from her face. “I get it. Only you. But I’ll only agree to that if the same applies in reverse.”
I gave her the truest fucking words I’d said in a decade. “You’re it for me, sweetheart.”
A smile, bright and pure, spread across her face. “Okay.” But then her small-as-hell hand tightened on my wrist. “Can I go home?”
“Yes.” I nodded once, but I didn’t want her to go home. I wanted her with me.
“It’s safe?” she asked tentatively.
“You’re safe,” I clarified.
She stared at me for a long moment, then braved a question I saw coming a mile away. “Did you do what you said you were going to do?”
I gave her the truth. “I did.”
“Thank you.” Immediate and full of relief, she gave me two words that didn’t hold a single fucking ounce of judgment.
“You’re welcome.” I opened my mouth to tell her I wanted to take her to my place, but a loud knock sounded on the door.
“Asher,” Luna boomed. “Open up.”
Ludeviene flinched, and irrational anger at Luna flared. “Hold the fuck up,” I yelled over my shoulder, before grabbing my boxers off the floor and handing them to her. “Go clean up, sweetheart. I’ll handle this, then we’ll get you out of here.”
She took my boxers. “Where?”
I didn’t hesitate. “You’re coming home with me.”
Luna knocked again, louder this time. “Now, Asher.”
She looked between me and the door and she shivered.
“It’s okay,” I promised. “Go. I’ll handle Luna.”
Voices erupted in the hall and Luna pounded on the door. “ Asher! ”
She double-timed to the bathroom.