The Amendment (Arrangement #2)

Chapter 20

CHAPTER TWENTY

PETER

B y the time I got back to my house from Jim’s, I was all pent up. I’d spent most of last night and all of this morning preparing to murder one of my longtime friends.

I’d loaded up my tools in the car—a knife, a tarp, the cleaning supplies—and I’d driven the hour and a half to his place.

Upon arrival, I’d realized he wasn’t there.

Did he expect me to show up and try something? Maybe.

But some part of me had to believe he’d never expect me to try something so bold.

So, now, I’d built myself up for the murder—so excited I could practically hear his last breaths, feel the blood specks on my skin—only to be completely let down when it didn’t happen.

It was the emotional equivalent of blue balls.

As I neared the house, I spied Ainsley waiting on the porch swing, a mug of tea in her hands. I loved seeing her that way. So calm. So peaceful. Oblivious, even.

If only she knew what I was going through to protect her.

I climbed from the car and made my way up the porch to join her.

“Whatcha thinking about?”

She’d changed clothes from when I’d seen her last, and up close I noticed red flecks in her auburn hair. Had she been painting?

“Where were you?” she asked, her eyes darting to meet mine.

“Sorry it took so long. I stopped by the store to look for that coffee creamer I like, but they were out. I went to half a dozen places and no one had it.”

She nodded stiffly, standing and walking past me.

“Headed inside?”

“Yeah.” She pushed the door open behind her, letting me grab hold of it to follow her in. “I should warn you, it’s kind of a mess in here.”

“What do you—” Before I could finish the question, I stepped through the door into the house and every nerve in my body lit up. I smelled the rusty iron scent of blood.

A lot of blood.

“Ainsley?”

She ignored me, moving through the living room as if she didn’t smell a thing. Suddenly, I thought back to the specks of red in her hair. “Ainsley?”

No. It wasn’t possible.

I didn’t have time to process my suspicions. Seconds later, I was in the kitchen and they were confirmed. In the center of the floor, a body lay wrapped in clear, plastic cloth. Surprisingly, the room was otherwise clean.

I stared at my wife, then at the body.

It wasn’t possible.

It had to be a joke.

She wasn’t capable of this.

“What happened?”

“Your friend came by.” Her arms were wrapped around herself, the mug of tea still gripped in one hand.

“Friend?” Jim. My stomach knotted. “What happened? Did he…did he hurt you?”

At that, she snorted, her brows raising in amusement. “He tried. I stopped him, no thanks to you.”

“I don’t understand… He wasn’t supposed to be here.”

“Did you honestly think he would just be waiting at home for you to come by? Seriously, Peter? Use your head.”

“I—” How did she know I’d gone to his house? How did she know anything? “I don’t understand.”

She snapped her fingers, as if she’d just thought of something. “I’ll tell you what I don’t understand. I don’t understand why you wouldn’t just tell me what was going on. Why didn’t you tell me what he wanted, Peter? It would’ve saved us all a lot of trouble.”

“How do you know what he wanted?” I demanded, still completely lost.

“Do you honestly think I haven’t learned to listen in on your calls by now?”

What the hell? “Listen in? What do you mean? Do you have my phone bugged? Or the house? Or—”

“It doesn’t really matter. What matters is that I shouldn’t have to do it. You should be honest with me so it’s not necessary. But you’ve proven time and time again that it is necessary. If you’d told me what was going on, we could’ve set him up. Had him come here and killed him together. Like a team. Like the team that you claim we are. Instead, you decided to try to take matters into your own hands with some stupid plan that was never going to work, and I had to handle this.” She gestured toward the body with a sigh.

“What did you do, Ainsley?” I couldn’t decide whether to be horrified or impressed.

She rambled off what she’d done as if it were a grocery list. “I texted him after you fell asleep and told him to come here. Told him the deal was on. Then, after you left, I set up the room and waited. When he got here, I pretended to try to run, led him in here, and stabbed him.”

“Wh- what? You should’ve told me what you were planning! I would’ve helped you. You have no idea how dangerous he is! He could’ve hurt you.”

“Yeah, no kidding, but it’s you who should’ve told me! And thank God I did have an idea how dangerous he was. Otherwise, I would’ve been left alone without a plan at all when he arrived.”

“You’re right,” I admitted, nodding my head. “You’re right. I should’ve told you. I just know how much you’re dealing with right now with Maisy and the coach and…everything else. I was trying to take something off your plate and handle it myself.”

“When will you realize I don’t need to be protected? I just need to be on your team.” She huffed a breath, setting her tea on the counter. “God, Peter, that’s all I want. Why won’t you let me in? What else do I have to do to prove to you that we’re in this together?”

I stared down at the body between us, our biggest problem solved. She was right. She’d done enough—more than enough—to prove we were in this together. The gravity of the situation slammed into my chest. I could’ve lost her. She’d saved us. No thanks to me, she’d saved us.

“Nothing. I’m sorry. God, I’m sorry. You’re…you’re amazing, Ains. I’m so glad you’re okay.” I pulled her to me, kissing her. Suddenly, a passion of a new sort ignited in me. “You really did this?” I asked, pulling us apart and resting her forehead on mine.

“Mhm.” She grinned wickedly. She’d enjoyed it. I could see that in her expression. My little killer.

“I want to hear every detail.”

“Whatever you say.” She kissed me again. “But let’s take care of this first,” she said, nodding toward the body. “We’ll do it together.”

“Good thinking.” At least, one of us was thinking. All I could think of was her. “I’ll get his head, you get his feet. Let’s take him out back. I’ll show you where to go.”

At least for this part, she still needed me. This was where I excelled.

Without hesitation, we jumped into action, gripping his body in the tarp and dragging him down the hall. She’d wrapped the corners in duct tape, and I could see the blood pooling underneath the foggy plastic.

There was so much blood. It must’ve been a head injury.

Or an artery.

But which ?

I wanted to know everything, but she was focused.

One thing at a time.

I kicked the back door open and we dragged him across the yard, completely hidden by the solace of our trees. We pulled the body past the garden and the fruit trees we’d planted when the kids were young.

When we’d reached the tree line, we were both panting and out of breath.

I couldn’t believe this was happening.

It was like a fever dream.

For so long, I’d brought bodies to the woods alone, buried them alone, reveled in these moments alone. I thought bringing Ainsley into the process would take some of the enjoyment out of it for me, but as I stared at her, panting and sweaty, flecks of blood in her hair and eyelashes, knowing what she’d done… I could only wonder why I hadn’t brought her into my world sooner.

There were two versions of myself. The version I showed the world: the father, the architect, the husband, the friend. Then there was the version that existed underneath all of that, the one only my victims, Jim, and now my wife knew: animalistic, vengeful, insatiable.

Seeing her come into that world, come to know that version, had once repulsed me. Terrified me.

Now I couldn’t think of anything more natural.

Of course she should know me in this state.

The protector.

The animal.

Stripped down to my basic, primal needs.

Her being one of them .

Maybe this was the solution to my desires, after all. Maybe she was right.

She swiped her hand across her forehead. “Where to?”

She needed me here. She was helpless for the next part. She couldn’t dig the graves, couldn’t bury the bodies.

She needed me.

She needed me.

She needed me.

“Peter,” she said, her tone pointed, and I snapped out of my thoughts.

“Sorry. This way.” I jutted my head to our left and led her down the small path and past the gully. We went down one side and up the other, stopping occasionally to catch our breath.

“How much farther?” she asked when we stopped the final time between two large oak trees.

“It’s here,” I told her, wiping sweat from my upper lip.

“Here?” Her eyes widened, staring at the ground below her. She was standing just above the bodies I’d buried, though you couldn’t tell at a glance. I’d been careful, meticulous about their placement, making sure to keep the ground as undisturbed as possible.

I came back occasionally, even when I didn’t need to, just to check on them.

They were my trophies.

The pairs of underwear were one thing, but the bodies, those were the true prizes.

My victims were the only ones who knew what I was capable of.

At least, until now.

“I’ll go get a shovel from the garage,” she said, turning and rushing back toward the house. I nodded, then bent down, pulling back a bit of the tarp to look at his face.

Even through the plastic, I could see the dark, black line running across his neck. I grinned.

It wasn’t a method I would’ve chosen, but it worked.

It got the job done.

I replaced the tarp, covering his face again.

Jim didn’t deserve to be buried with my victims—he wasn’t special enough. He’d tried to harm Ainsley. But I owed him thanks for introducing me to the darkest, most satisfying parts of myself. For that, he would be buried with respect, albeit separately.

After several minutes had passed, Ainsley returned with two shovels and we set to work, digging carefully closest to the oak tree on the left.

“Are the others close by?” she asked cautiously.

“Close, yeah.” I wanted to tell her everything, but I couldn’t. Something inside of me prevented it, as much as I loved this. That was before, this was now. She could know everything going forward, but those memories were just mine.

I needed to retain control of them.

To my relief, she continued digging without asking anything else.

It was grueling work, especially in the summer heat, but it would all be worth it. I measured the hole with the length of my shovel. Once it was large enough to fit the entire thing, I tossed the shovel aside.

“Okay, slide him to me slowly,” I instructed, easing down inside the grave. She leaned forward, pushing his body forward, her breasts pressing against the top of her tank top. I shook my head, trying to focus. It was a struggle, though. This was a whole new level of excitement for me. The two things I loved most in the world combined into one moment. One fleeting, intense, powerful moment that would be over all too soon.

Once the body was inside the grave, we shoveled the dirt on top of him. We started slowly, making sure we’d covered every inch of him, then began to push the dirt in quicker.

Goodbye, old friend.

If someone had told me years ago that our friendship, the one that started the day I moved into my dorm room all those years ago, would end with him being buried in my backyard, I never would’ve believed it.

But this was how it had to happen. He’d gotten in over his head, pushed us too far. That was the problem with Jim—he didn’t know how to take no for an answer. He always wanted something more.

With the last of the dirt shoveled over top of him, I stepped onto the grave, stamping it down. I held out a hand for Ainsley and she joined me, stepping onto fresh dirt cautiously.

“Help me even it out.”

Once the earth was flattened as much as possible, she stepped off the grave, swiping the back of her hand across her forehead and reaching for the shovel.

“We really should’ve brought water out here. It’s scorching.”

I couldn’t listen, couldn’t respond. The version of myself she had yet to meet was still here, still in control. I grabbed her arm, my grip too tight, and she turned her head to look at me.

“What are you—”

I cupped her face, pressing our lips together and forcing her backward until we smacked into the tree. She whimpered, but I didn’t care.

Couldn’t.

Pain was necessary sometimes.

Our kisses were hot and feverish, moans of pure ecstasy escaping our throats as I pulled her shirt over her head, breaking apart for merely a second.

God, she was beautiful.

I gripped her hands together, holding them above her head against the tree. I trailed passionate kisses across her collarbone, tasting the saltiness of her skin.

I lifted my face to hers, rubbing the stubble on my chin across her cheek as I moved toward her ear. “Tell me what you did to him.”

Her eyes widened with shock, then narrowed as she tried to pull away from me. We locked eyes, a challenge in mine. “Tell me.”

Dark heat filled her expression. “I killed him.”

I lowered my mouth to her breast, biting at a bit of her flesh. She jolted. “Tell me how.”

I closed my mouth over her breast, tempting and teasing her. She moaned, her eyes closed with pleasure, mouth dropped open. When she didn’t say anything, I stopped and released her hands, pulling her face to look at me with force. “Tell. Me. How.” I slipped my hand inside her pants, my fingers between her legs as she twisted and writhed against me. I pressed my forehead to hers, her breath on my lips. She tried to kiss me, but I held back. “ Tell. Me. How.” I removed my hand from between her legs, refusing to do anything else until she’d answered me. “Ainsley, now. Tell me!”

“With…with a knife.” She panted. “Please, Peter…”

“Good girl.” I rewarded her, slipping my fingers back in place. “Did he beg you to stop?”

She bit her bottom lip, shaking her head.

“No? Say it. Tell me.”

“No.” Her voice was breathless. I removed my hand, much to her disapproval. “Don’t stop…”

Heat shot through me like lightning as I pulled away from her and slid her pants down her legs, each inch of skin exposed met with a kiss. I tossed them across the woods, far from us. I wanted to see all of her.

It was what Jim had wanted.

What everyone wanted when they saw her.

But she was only mine.

Forever.

I kneeled in front of her, taking in the sight of her innocent eyes watching me. Waiting. Wondering what I was going to do. “Did he know it was coming?”

“No,” she said, gripping my hair with both hands, trying to force me toward her. I stayed strong.

I was stronger than her, and I wanted to remind her of that. I let her continue to try, though, hardly wavering in place, even with the pain as she pulled my hair harder. I could feel nothing but desire at that moment.

Nothing but want.

“No?”

“I caught him by surprise,” she said breathlessly .

“How did he look? After you’d done it?” I asked, grabbing her hands from the top of my head and pushing them against the tree. “Scared?”

“Terrified.” She bit her lip again, and I leaned forward, giving in and pressing my mouth exactly where she wanted it. To the place that belonged only to me.

She cried out and I stood, unable to control myself any longer. I grabbed her, spinning her around and shoving her body into the tree. She was shaking, pressing up on her toes as I unhooked my pants and entered her from behind, white-hot pleasure ricocheting through me.

She cried out again, and I covered her mouth with my hand, wanting her quieter and louder at the same time. I pressed my face to her hair, breathing in her scent as we moved together, perfectly in sync.

It was funny.

Once, I’d thought I could only feel this way when ending a life, but here it was with her…that inexplicable feeling I’d spent my life chasing. I couldn’t put my finger on exactly what it was.

I felt…

Free.

Awake.

Alive.

Yes , maybe that was it.

I’d never… Never felt so alive.