Chapter 10
Ten
I t was getting embarrassing how often I was waking up hard and needy. The first few days after the attack, it was fine. I woke up cuddled against Rath and happy. But eventually the dirty dreams came back, and they were getting more salacious as time went on. Every smirk and smile he sent my way was fuel for more dirty dreams. Twice now, I woke up grinding my arousal against his hip, so close to completion, a stiff breeze would have pushed me over the edge.
I wasn’t na?ve enough to think Rath didn’t notice. He wasn’t oblivious. But he was kind enough not to bring it up, waiting long enough for me to calm down before starting our daily routine. He forced me out of the tent when I tried to hide after my attack, but instead of bringing me to the village center, he left me with his brother instead while he went hunting. Godr was a goofball, and he still hadn’t learned to slow down his speech so I could only get half of what he was saying to me, but I liked watching him train the younger horses and he let me visit with the calmer ones while he was busy.
Squeezing my eyes shut, I ran through what I planned to do with my day. Or, at least, that had been my intention. But instead of ignoring it like he normally did, Rath pulled me in tighter, pressing a small kiss right below my ear.
“You hide from me, my Finn.”
“N-No, I don’t,” I protested, squirming when his thumb brushed over my nipple as he tugged me closer.
He nipped my neck just rough enough to make me gasp before soothing the sting with a kiss. He was more affectionate since our first kiss, but he’d never been this forward before. My stomach flipped when his hand moved lower and I almost wanted to let him touch me, but the embarrassment overwhelmed me before he could and I caught his wrist to stop him.
Usually, my apprehension was enough to stop him. When he tried to kiss me out in the field while visiting Vann and I shied away, he didn’t push. He detoured and kissed the top of my head instead before taking me on a short ride with him. This time, he was determined to get me to admit I was hiding something from him. No amount of fighting or squirming helped, and I ended up flat on my back with my arms trapped over my head. My breath caught in my throat as the weight of him settled against my throbbing erection. I tried to look anywhere but at him, embarrassed at my reaction.
“Finn. Look at me,” he cajoled, running his nose along my jaw.
I shook my head. I was too embarrassed. At least until he moved his hips, and I felt his erection rub against mine. My response was immediate and even more embarrassing than the erection. I let out a lusty moan, bucking my hips to get him to repeat the movement. He did, and I almost reached completion with that one move.
“Finn…” Rath’s voice was strained and when I finally looked up at him, his expression was heat and pain, like he was fighting to keep his control.
I remembered what Zoya said about tributes having a choice. I never actually told Rath I wanted him. He was reacting like any man would to someone squirming and moaning against him, but he didn’t know how I felt about it.
“Please… Please don’t stop.”
That time, it was his turn to groan. He rocked against me, sending lightning shocks of pleasure exploding through me with every rut of his hips. I gasped and moaned, lifting my hips as much as I could, but I didn’t have much leverage. Not until I got my legs free and spread them, so he lay between them.
“ Finn ,” Rath groaned, his pace increasing as he ground against me. Hearing my name on his lips, said so rough and lusty, had me spilling my seed, shooting over the edge with a cry. My whole body shook with the force of it, the thrash of my heart beat in my ears nearly drowning out Rath’s moan as he reached completion just after me.
When I finally came down from the intensity of the release, my stomach was sticky, the tunic I slept in was wet, and the man I was falling for was looking at me like something precious. I was happy with that.
“Why?”
I was whining. I knew I was. But he said we had to go to the river to clean up. The thought of entering that icy water again was… I shuddered at the thought. Jailed for two days wasn’t as torturous as that.
“To get clean. Come, my Finn. It is safe.”
That wasn’t what I was worried about, but it did make me frown. Was it something I needed to worry about?
“Why did you say that? Is it ever unsafe?”
He pressed his lips together and refused to answer. With days of constantly using his language, I felt like I had a decent grasp of it, enough for him to explain things to me, but his refusal spoke volumes. Great. Something else to be terrified of.
Rath pulled me against him, running his fingers through my hair with a smile. “You are safe, my Finn.”
His constant determination to call me his melted me every single time he said it. I was his Finn. And if I wanted to stay his, I needed to embrace every aspect of being in the clan. Including the freezing river baths.
Lifting my chin, I nodded once. “Okay. Let’s go.”
We weren’t the only ones at the river this time. There was a group of men there, cleaning themselves briskly. Rath steered us away and farther down the river until we had some semblance of privacy. He stripped his clothes with quick efficiency and dove in, looking completely unbothered when he came up for air. Meanwhile, I barely got a toe in the water before I was scuttling back away from the edge, my head shaking rapidly.
“No. It’s too cold. I can’t.”
Rath’s expression was patient amusement. He put his hand out and waited for me, pride stretching across his face when I relented and entered the water. I loved that look, and it almost made getting into the water worth it. It was horrible, so cold I couldn’t breathe, and it felt like my testicles were trying to climb back up into my body. I hurried forward, pressing myself against Rath to steal his warmth as much as I was able, my teeth chattering from the icy cold.
Rath hummed, rubbing his rough hand along my spine. “We won’t get clean this way.”
“Y-Yes we will. Y-You can work around me,” I chattered, considering climbing him to get closer. He felt warm between my thighs this morning. Couldn’t I have that again?
“No. It only makes me want to dirty you more.”
I didn’t know what he meant by that until he pushed his erection against my belly. I gasped, looking up at him wide-eyed. “How can you be aroused right now? It’s too cold!”
He barked out a laugh, his head thrown back, and my heart stuttered in my chest. He was so handsome. And right now, all mine. I felt my own arousal stir, brutal temperatures be damned, but besides a heated look and a kiss that was so dirty it warmed me to my toes, Rath didn’t let us linger for a repeat of our morning activities. He lathered soap from a bar and scrubbed himself down, working around me just like I requested. When it was my turn, he didn’t force me to move away, instead washing me himself. His hands left trails of heat in their wake, keeping me plenty warm until we were finished.
“M-Maybe the river i-isn’t so bad,” I murmured as he ran soapy fingers through my hair.
“Mm. Hold your breath.”
Confused, I frowned up at him. He mimicked what he wanted, and I did as he asked, but I didn't understand why until he dunked my head under the water. I came out with a screech, this time not hesitating to climb him to get closer for warmth.
“Rath!”
He bellowed out another laugh, his eyes crinkled at the sides with his amusement.
“W-Why?” I whined, so cold I couldn’t even feel my extremities anymore. At least my teeth stopped chattering.
“To get the soap out,” he replied with a grin. “There’s more left.”
I shook my head rapidly. “No. I’ll keep it there. I can’t do it again.”
His smile softened to affection, and he cradled me close with a hand on my lower back. “Hold on.”
Tightening my grip around his neck, I trusted him to maneuver me, tipping my head back when he dipped low enough to get my hair wet. He was quick about it, for which I was grateful, and he didn’t put me down as we got out of the water. Not until he dried me off with a cloth and I could put my clothes back on.
After Rath was dressed, he steered me to the fighter’s fire, as he called it. He still wouldn’t bring me to the village center until he figured out who hurt me. When I told him I didn’t know, he asked what they looked like, but it was too dark for me to tell. And I couldn’t admit out loud that it was a woman. I was too embarrassed. I liked the people at the fighter’s fire, though. They were loud and boisterous, but friendly and they didn’t blink twice at me cuddled in Rath’s lap as I attempted to get warm.
“No more river,” I complained, tucking my arms under his tunic to warm my hands. He flinched from the cold and nodded.
“Okay. No more river.”
We stayed that way until I could feel my extremities again. And when Zoya arrived for another language lesson, I was smiling.