The Blue Rose

12. Aster

TWELVE

ASTER

S lamming my fists down on my steering wheel, I rub my hands down my face. “Fuck it.” I get out of the car and bang on her door, my fist unrelenting against the weathered wood. She opens the only barrier between us, just a crack door, tears spilling down her cheeks. Before she can say anything, I slam open the door and crash my mouth against hers, pushing her inside and kicking the door shut behind me.

She struggles out of my grip and punches my chest with glancing blows. “No. You don’t get to come in here and kiss me like that after rejecting me. You lost your chance.”

I growl frustrated, “I changed my mind.”

She punches me again, harder this time. “You don’t get to just change your mind!” She screams, crying harder and banging on my chest. “I’ve been rejected so many times, but being rejected by you, Aster, after what we already have done? Really fucking hurt.”

I grab her hands and make her look at me. “I know, I’m sorry, but look I can’t take you to my house, not yet; I’m not ready.” My hands tighten around hers, as the confession I didn’t mean to speak leaves my lips.

She freezes, looking at me confused. “Not ready for what?”

I sigh, “For telling you the reason why I call you little lamb.”

This has never happened before, I have never second guessed who I choose as my little lambs. Never have I not wanted to kill a lamb, once chosen. Serena is making me lose my mind.

Her brow furrows. “That doesn’t even make any sense, and even though I want to know why you call me that, why do I have to be told the reason at your home? Can’t you just tell me now?”

“That is the only place it will make sense, and right now… I don't want to tell you. I can’t tell you.” I push into her, backing her close to the wall behind her “I want to be inside you.” Her skin flushes and her breathing halts.

She yanks herself out of my grasp, crossing her arms like a child would when they don’t get their way. “Yeah, well, right now I don’t want that. You need to leave.”

I scoff at her request. “That’s not happening.”

She turns to walk upstairs, “You can let yourself out.” Before she makes it even one step, I grab her, spin her around, and pin her up against the wall. I run my nose along the graceful column of her neck, inhaling her scent. She smells like roses and lavender, reminding me of my home in the spring.

It’s been so long since I’ve touched any woman, and her scent alone has all my senses going out the window. If she told me to get on my knees, I'd push her to hers, and shove my cock down her throat. The animalistic side of me needs to have her, ever since I got a taste I have wanted nothing more than to feel her wrapped around me.

“You smell so fucking good.”

Pressing my hips against her, I feel her shaking beneath me, and I can't tell if it’s from anger or if she’s turned on. I opt for the latter and start to kiss her neck, eliciting a small moan. I chuckle into her skin and slowly move my lips up to her mouth. She turns her head, denying me the prize I crave. “Oh? You think, you can deny me what’s mine?” I say pressing my fingers into her cheeks, making her look like an adorable pouty fish.

She turns to respond, her eyes flashing with the spark she hides deep within. “I know I can deny you what’s mine .”

Those words of her claiming herself are my undoing. Not giving her any more words to use against me, I grab her hands, pinning them above her head, and crushing my lips against hers. She struggles to move her head, fighting against my power, so I deepen the kiss. A small moan escapes, and my little lamb finally gives into what we both want.

Her hands separate from mine, and wrap around my neck, deepening the kiss. I nuzzle my face in her breast when I lift her up. She leans her head back, to give me easier access. “Aster,” she rasps.

My hands tighten around her bottom, her legs wrap around my waist, “Hold on, little lamb.” Her brows knit together and before she can answer, I’m running us up the stairs. She hugs herself into me, holding on for dear life, her body shaking from the fear or excitement, I’m unsure of, maybe both. “Where’s your room?” I growl, impatience lacing every word. She nods her head in the direction of the room, lucky for me it is already open or I would have kicked it down.

The compulsion to consume her is fighting inside me with the fox who wants to run, who is frightened to take things further than I already have. I pushed the thoughts of running away, if I ran she would never speak to me again and I would lose my chance to play and lay her on my table.

I throw her on the bed, she bounces as she falls onto her back, her hair cascaded all around her, making her look like the siren she is. My chest heaves in and out, I feel my eyes darken, as I take in the woman laid before me. “Turn around and get on your knees.'' I demand, no room in my voice for argument. She doesn’t respond, but obeys my command and turns over getting on her knees, ass high in the air, “Good girl.” My hand lands a loud smack against it, echoing the sound in the room.

The sound that escapes her lips and the way her head hangs down, has me smacking it one more time, before I crawl onto the bed. My weight causes the bed to dip and I lean down to kiss her shoulder blade. Her skin is soft everywhere my lips touch. Making me greedy for more, I rip off her shirt from behind, tearing the fabric in half, her breast falling free, and landing right into my waiting hands. “No bra?” I question, massaging her ample breast. “Seems like your words tonight don't match your actions. You were always planning on being my subservient whore, weren’t you, little lamb?”

She doesn’t answer, I smirk and slip her jeans down a little just so I can see her supple ass. “Do you know what happens to bad girls, who don’t answer when spoken to?” Silence is all I’m left with; this must be her way to defy me for rejecting her earlier tonight.

I will make her scream.

I raise my hand and bring it down hard, against her ass, leaving a bright red handprint behind. She whimpers but still stays silent. “Your stubbornness to respond, is going to be your undoing, little lamb.”

I pinch her nipples and twist them, hard enough that her lips part and she moans her approval. “Feel that?” I say pressing my cock into her ass. She moans out yes, and I remove my hands from her. “Only good girls get to be pleasured. Are you going to be my good girl, Serena? Or are you going to be my bad girl and keep being punished?”

She turns her head, a small smile playing on her lips, “Bad girl.”

She is going to wish she said, ‘good girl’.

I flip her over in one smooth motion, she’s on her back staring up at me with lust filled eyes, the defiance dimming as my hand wraps around her breast.

“You’re perfect,” I place my mouth over her taut nipple and bite down hard enough to make her cry out. “Perfect, but still going to be punished.” Her back arches off the bed just slightly to show me the scream that left her lips, was one of pleasure, not pain.

That won’t do.

Biting harder, her screams become louder, filling the room, I can taste the metallic of her blood, in my mouth. I can hear her cries echoing off the walls of my sanctuary back home, which makes my cock twitch, and beg for her heat. Is this what she will sound like when she’s screaming in my work space?

“Fuck!” she moans out, arching into me.

I remove my mouth and hands from her nipples, kissing my way down her stomach. I reach for her jeans, sit back on my heels and take them off. I smile down at what I find, my mouth watering as her scent fills the room. “Wore these just for me, huh?” I say locking my fingers under her black lace thong. She looks down and nods her head, her skin flushing even more. I slide the delicate fabric off and inhale her once again. “Fuck, the things you’re doing to me, Serena.”

She bucks her hips up, her body begging for my touch. “Things you could be doing to me, but you’re too busy talking.”

I smirk up and chuckle “Oh, you are going to eat your words.”

She smiles at me “Looks like you’re the one whose about to eat”

“You’re right.” I plunge my face between her legs and begin meticulous licks which have her shaking in seconds. As a punishment for her smart mouth, I bite her clit making her yelp, and bow off the bed, pushing her sweet cunt harder against my tongue. Before she can scold me, I shove two fingers inside her and feast once more.

She’s convulsing minutes later, I come back up and kiss her lips. “I’m not done with you just yet. It’s my turn, little lamb.”

I get off the bed and take my shirt off. She watches me, heat and desire pooling in her gaze as she grasps the sheets. I grab my wallet from my back pocket and take a condom out of it, tossing it across the room as I unzip my pants and slide them off. I watch her eyes travel down to the bulge coming through my black boxers, her tongue wetting her lips as she waits.

Smirking, I bare myself, my cock springing free as her eyes widen. “That thing is way too big, no way it’s going to fit-.” she says, scooting back on the bed away from me.

A dark chuckle escapes me, pinning her in place with my eyes. “We’ll make it fit.” I say placing the condom over my cock.

She shakes her head, her eyes panicked. “No, no, no, no… Don’t you dare come near me with that, you are going to break me.”

I grab her feet and pull her to the edge of the bed, her ass hanging off, throwing her legs over my shoulders. “Breaking you is exactly what I want to do.” I plunge into her, making her scream as I slide against her slick heat. I thrust in and out, going faster and deeper with every snap of my hips. “Fuck, Serena, you’re so fucking tight, I could stay buried inside you all night.”

She lifts her hips allowing me deeper access, her eyes shuttering closed in bliss.

“I thought you said I’d break you?” I pull back and slam myself into her, enjoying every little flinch and gasp I pull from her body.

She winces. “I like a little pain with pleasure, no ones ever given it to me the way I needed it before.”

Inflicting pain is my favorite hobby, I love to ring out the screams from my lambs, watching the fear in their eyes as they realize they’re never going to escape me. Serena’s screams are my favorite, when she’s in pain, when she’s releasing pleasure, all of it, music to my ears.

I’m beginning to think she’s the fox, and I’m the lamb.

That thought has me spiraling as I squeeze her throat, my grip tightening with each thrust. Her eyes start to water, and I can see she’s struggling to breathe. A tear escapes, and I watch as it falls down. I lean in and lick it, letting the saltines soak into my tongue. I moan my pleasure, “Even your tears taste addicting. I’m never letting you go, little lamb.”

She is absolutely beautiful beneath me, my hands draining the life from her. I quicken my pace as she starts to gasp for air, her face starting to turn purple. I explode inside her, releasing her throat, her walls clenching around me. “Fuck, Serena.” I say through clenched teeth, slowly pulling out of her.

She sits up and starts coughing while I discard the condom. I leave the room, heading downstairs to her kitchen and return a few minutes later with a glass of water. She takes it from me, a soft smile on her lips, and gulps it down.

“Thank you, at first I thought you just fucked the life out of me and then left.”

My body tenses at her words, I contemplated leaving while filling up a glass of water. I decided against it when the thought of never seeing her again crossed my mind. If I left after that, she would never speak to me again and I would never get to hear her screams.

She takes notice, her brows pinching together, I lean down and kiss her lips softly. “I would never do that to my little lamb.” Her eyes soften, trusting the words I say.

She gets under the covers and motions for me to come lay next to her, I hesitantly get into the bed and hold her in my arms.

She looks up at me running her hand across my chest, “Do you remember the conversation we had about your tattoos? When we first met?” She looks up at me through her lashes.

Does she want me to tattoo her now?

“Are you asking me to tattoo you, little lamb?”

She springs up, “No! I’m not ready for that yet.” She bites her lip, “I wanted to know what each one meant, the ones I couldn’t see.”

My eyes lift, “Which ones would you like to know about?”

I watch as her eyes travel down my naked body, taking in all the ink. She touches the grim reaper tattoo, “Can I guess what this one means?”

Everyone who has seen this tattoo and makes remarks on what it means always gets it wrong. They usually guess the harbinger of death, anything among the lines of the dead. To normal people that is what it means, but I’m not normal.

She traces her fingers down my arms, stopping at the blue roses that morph into the reaper. Something like recognition in them for a moment until she shakes her head and brings her eyes back up to meet mine.

“I would say, harbinger of death.”

I knew it.

She chews on her lip, “That would be too obvious though.” That’s surprising. “ Everything about you, is anything, but obvious.” I stay quiet letting her continue, curious as to what she thinks it means. “You have the roses morphing into the reaper.” Her fingers leave goosebumps behind as she traces up my arm. “I think it means that there is beauty, even in death.” My body stills, mouth parted slightly as she says exactly what this tattoo means to me. “If you look at it either way, the reaper turning into the roses, it means the same.”

Her eyes meet mine and I’m captivated by how she looks, and how her brain thinks the same way as mine. “Aster?” She asks quietly, head slightly tilted.

I tuck her hair behind her ear, “You’re right.”

Her whole face lights up, “Are you serious? I actually got it right? I never get tattoo meanings right with anyone. I always think out of the box, and most people's reasoning are simple and boring.” She sits up and throws the blanket off, “Let me see the one on your calf.”

Before I can turn over for her, she grabs my leg and lifts it in the air. “A fox?” She taps her bottom lip, thinking. “I called you that the first time we met, and you looked shocked for a moment.”

She noticed that?

She leans in closer, inspecting every inch of my tattoo. There’s no way she will guess the reason for this one. Her hand holds firm around my ankle, her grip tightening the longer she stares. She drops my leg and sits back. “I’m not sure about this one. You call me little lamb, I’m assuming as a cute nickname.” If only she knew why I really call her that. I smile, “I’m right aren’t I? If it’s a nickname, then either you love foxes, or it was a nickname for you.”

What the actual fuck? I stare gobsmacked at my little lamb, watching as she slightly bounces, waiting impatiently for my answer. “My parents used to call me, little fox.”

She slaps my chest, “Shut the fuck up, I was right again?” The shock I was feeling, is replaced with admiration, for how cute and excited she is. “Do you have any more? This is a fun game and I’m actually winning.”

I turn my head, letting her see the lighter with blue roses, wrapped behind a knife, behind my ear. “You really like blue roses, don’t you?” I nod my head, “I like them too, they’re my favorite flower, and the Morbid Monet uses them.”

My world is spinning, my heart is racing, I can’t breathe. Did she really just say my serial killer name? Does she know who I really am? I feel her breathing against my neck, her words bringing me back from my spiral. “I don’t like them because of him, but I think it’s cool I have a connection like that to him. Jessica thinks I’m crazy for how invested I am in him. He’s a serial killer after all, one that seems to kill women who are plus sized. I don’t know, I just feel drawn to him.” She sits back and looks into my eyes, searching for my reaction.

She’s right about my type for killing, that’s why I approached her. The connection she feels between us, maybe that’s why I haven’t killed her yet. Not because of how delectable she tastes and feels, but because there is some unknown connection. This link might be the reason why I’m waiting so long to kill her, and I will. It might take longer than my other lambs did, but I will lay her on my table.

“It’s weird, I know, maybe I should listen to Jess and stop this weird obsession with him.”

“No!” I say gripping her arms, surprising us both with my reaction.

“No?” She tilts her head.

“Don’t listen to your friend, you can like whatever you want, even if that is a serial killer who would kill you.”

“You’re right, normal is boring anyway. Back to the tattoo behind your ear.”

She places her hand on the side of my head, and I lean into it, closing my eyes. “It’s the first lighter I ever bought, I don’t use it anymore, but I still have it.”

Her hand leaves my head, taking away the comfort I was in. I open my eyes and see her bottom lips jutted out and her arms crossed. “That’s not fair, I wanted to guess.”

I uncross her arms and pull her into me. “It’s okay I do have one more you missed.”

She looks up with a pouty face, “Where?” I dip my head to my chest, her eyes follow my line of sight. “I can’t believe I forgot this one! I was looking at it when you took your shirt off, but was quickly distracted.”

“What do you think this means?”

She touches the blade that pierces my heart, trailing her finger down the blood. She looks at me with sad eyes, causing my heart to twinge. “I don’t want to guess that one, my guess is sad.” She looks back down at it.

I tilt her chin up to look at me, “Guess, Serena.” My heart racing at what I fear she may guess correctly.

She takes a deep breath, “The blade is piercing your heart, with it placed there your heart can’t beat… For anyone.”

I knew she would get it right.

Instead of answering, I pull her into my arms and stroke her head. She doesn’t ask if she was right, we both know she was. She nuzzles in closer and closes her eyes.

Once she is asleep, I sneak out of the bed, putting my clothes back on, and leave her room. I head to my car and sit there looking up at her house.

What the fuck am I doing?

I didn’t kill her, instead I went back to her place and fucked her. She’s still breathing, which wasn’t what I had planned for tonight.

She’s supposed to be dead.

Then she said she needed to text her friend my address, and I panicked. I can’t have anyone knowing where I live. I can’t have anyone finding my sanctuary. That’s why I drove her home. That's why I didn’t take her to my house. That doesn’t explain why I fucked her . She did ask me to choke her and that excited me. The only way I could choke her was to fuck her. Yeah, that’s why I did that.

I turn the music on, trying to drown out the thoughts plaguing my mind. “Shackles” by Steven Rodriguez starts to play through the speakers, as the lyrics drift through, I listen. Right before the second chorus plays I turn it off, thoughts of how true those words are, is frightening to me.

The moon is shining bright in the sky, the night so clear you can see every star shine, the complete opposite from what I’m feeling.

I roll all the windows down and I let the night air be my distraction on the way home.