The Breath Between Us

1. Chapter One

Chapter One

M erriam-Webster defined a best friend as both “a person’s closest and dearest friend” and “a person’s most desirable or valuable possession or resource.”

I bet when you read the word best friend , someone instantly came to mind. Someone in your world who fit that definition perfectly. A person you simply couldn’t do without.

And if you got lucky enough, and I mean really lucky, that person wasn’t just your friend. They were a soulmate in every sense of the word. Another human being that you’d swear was a part of you in another life. The one who could finish your sentence as soon as you opened your mouth. The one who could say nothing at all and still say everything you needed to hear.

The one you felt safe with.

The one who thought like you, acted like you, and said all the same things you did. Almost as if they were an extension of yourself. The one you could tell anything to, the one who would never judge you, no matter how ridiculous you sounded. The first one you called and the last one you wanted to leave. The one you fought with, argued with, and said hurtful things to, but somehow, always came back.

The one who cradled you at your worst and celebrated you at your best. The one who wiped away more tears than you could count because of stupid boyfriends, mean girls, and hard life moments. But most importantly, the person who made your world a better place.

And without them, you’d quite simply be lost.

If you were lucky, you had that one friend. For me, that friend was Olivia Mitchell. She was my other half, my soulmate, and my best friend.

Then

September 2013

“I’m not going,” I said, dramatically stomping away from the mirror and tossing the sixth failed outfit onto my bed. The faded blue jeans landed directly on top of Olivia’s legs.

“Miller, quit being dramatic. We’re going to this damn party whether you like it or not,” Olivia grumbled, maneuvering herself from the bed with a black T-shirt dress in tow.

“Wear this one. It really brings out your eyes.” She smirked.

I huffed. “You’re hilarious.”

“But could you please hurry? I know I said I wanted to show up late, but I didn’t mean this late.” She held up her phone, pointing to the time. “It’s not like it’s almost my birthday or anything.”

She snickered as she stepped in front of the mirror to take stock of her reflection. As she tousled her curls, her blonde hair bounced perfectly down her back while simultaneously shaping her face.

Olivia had always been a little loud with her outfit choices, but tonight’s was especially so. She’d be eighteen at midnight, and she wanted to make sure everyone was aware. Her lilac dress was suctioned to her body, hitting her curves in all the right spots, and her black sandals wrapped up her ankles, tying neatly around her calves.

She swiveled on her toes, looking at her backside while she pressed her hands against her hips. “Does this look okay?”

“You look amazing, per usual.”

“Promise?”

“Always.”

Olivia Mitchell had been my best friend since before we were born. Her parents moved to Montauk in 1995 and bought the house next door to mine. When our moms found out they were both pregnant and due around the same time, their friendship quickly blossomed.

Liv was born on Labor Day in 1996, and I followed shortly after at the beginning of December. I’d been following after Liv ever since.

She was the fearless one, the one who acted without thinking and never apologized for who she was. She was always one step ahead of everyone else, and thankfully, I was never too far behind her. Leading had always been a strong suit of hers.

Mine? Not so much, which was why she and I worked so well as best friends. I was the calculated one. The one able to talk Liv off a cliff after she’d reacted too quickly. The one who studied the options before making a move. Some might even say I was the practical one.

Despite the fact that we were wildly different, it’d always been Olivia and Miller, Liv and MJ. Although, we were oddly similar too.

“Are you done checking yourself out?” I laughed.

“I’m about to make an entrance at one of the biggest parties of the year on the eve of my eighteenth birthday, do you expect anything else?”

“Touché.”

“Okay, but really… how long until you’re ready?” She looked in my direction as I stood in only a bra and underwear, a casual black dress draped over my arm.

“Ugh, give me five minutes.” Shimmying into the dress, I said, “And honestly, it doesn’t matter what I look like because I can promise you, no one is going to be looking at me. Not to mention, we’ve been to Caleb’s Labor Day Eve party every summer since I can remember, and it’s always a letdown.”

Liv smirked. “Not this year.”

Liv had her eyes set on Caleb Davis—at least for the moment. Caleb was the varsity lacrosse star at Montauk High and had always been out of reach. That was, until his recent breakup. Now, all bets were off.

“Which ones?” I asked as I held up two pairs of shoes. “Sneakers or sandals?”

She put her hand on her hip. “You know I’m going to say the sandals and then you’re going to tell me that you don’t want to wear sandals. We’ll go back and forth, and ultimately, you’ll choose your beloved sneakers.”

“Damn, you do know me.” I smiled sarcastically.

I sat on my bed and pulled on the white-and-black scuffed shoes. My laces were tied and tucked into the sides, allowing me to slip them on quickly.

I stepped in front of the mirror, and my reflection stared back. My blonde hair was loosely curled and tousled just enough to make it look like it wasn’t dirty. My big blue eyes were engulfed with dark lashes that were coated with a thin layer of black mascara. A little lipstick decorated my plump lips in the softest shade of pink.

I dabbed at the corner of my mouth. “I’m ready,” I told her.

“As hot as ever.” She giggled, resting her weight against my desk.

“Ha. Let’s go,” I said, turning off the light as we left my room.

The smell of wine and smoked salmon filled the air as we walked downstairs to the sounds of chatting, presumably from both sets of our parents.

Friday night dinners were reserved for the Morgans and the Mitchells. It had been a tradition for as long as I could remember. Mom, Dad, Jess, and John were just as close as Liv and me, which meant I didn’t have just one mom and dad; I had two of each.

My mom’s voice made its way to the bottom step. “Headed to Caleb’s?”

That was the thing about growing up in a small town: everyone knew everyone. Caleb Davis had been throwing these parties since forever. Although, the activities that once consisted of hide-and-seek, popcorn, and late-night movies now looked more like loud music, underage drinking, and random hookups, but nonetheless, it was still a tradition.

And our parents weren’t na?ve—they knew what was happening. For the most part though, no one cared as long as we were safe.

John, Liv’s dad, chimed in. “Be careful and let us know if you need a ride home.”

“And by us, he means Kelli or me,” Jess added.

Mom clinked her wineglass with Jess’s before piping in. “Because we all know your fathers will be too busy doing something ridiculous like reorganizing the garage or smoking cigars out back while they reminisce on their younger years.”

“What they said.” Dad chuckled, and everyone else giggled.

“We will, love you!” Liv replied.

“Love you big,” I said, blowing a kiss in their direction.

Liv and I swayed toward the front door, locking our arms together as we walked outside.

“My car or yours?” she asked.

“Yours. I need gas,” I responded.

Making my way to the passenger side of her black VW Bug, I tugged at the door and slid in. The dead lilac hydrangeas caught my eye, perched lifeless against the plastic vase that sat directly next to her steering wheel. “Why is it that your flowers are always dead?”

“My flowers aren’t always dead. However, just because they’re dead doesn’t mean they’ve lost their beauty or their purpose.” She huffed. “In fact, it’s quite the opposite. I prefer my flowers dead, because unless you’re intentional with how you view them, you’ll overlook their beauty, completely missing out on everything they are because you’re looking for everything they once were.”

“Oh, okay, Taylor Swift. Getting all poetic on me,” I mocked. But her words somehow made sense. A sense of regret washed over me, making me sad for all the flowers I’d thrown in the trash after they’d lost their initial beauty. “Although, I guess you aren’t wrong.” I shrugged.

Slipping on my seat belt, I immediately reached for the aux cord to plug in my phone. “We Can’t Stop” by Miley Cyrus gushed through the speakers, and I turned the volume up even higher as I rolled down my window, letting the late summer breeze take over my entire body. The warmth of the air sent shivers right through me.

I peered at Liv and then back at the road ahead of us. My life was pretty damn good. I was strolling into my senior year with my best friend in tow. We weren’t exactly sure what our lives would look like after high school, but we didn’t care. All we knew was that whatever lay ahead of us, we’d endure it together.

I traced the wind with my fingertips. “What’s the plan tonight?”

Liv reached to turn down the music. “You mean, my plan?”

“Actually, let me guess—” I started.

“Caleb Davis!” we simultaneously shouted.

Our laughter filled the small space in the car.

“You little slut.” I giggled, smacking my hand against her bare shoulder.

I was totally kidding. Sort of.

“Ouch! That hurt!” she said, grinning at me, her perfect white teeth exposing themselves from behind her glossy lips.

Liv liked her boys, and she liked to fuck with them too. She’d messed around with a good majority of our class and a few of the younger classmen, but that was just Liv. She toyed with them until they wanted her, and then she ditched them. All of them except Caleb.

Me, on the other hand, well, I envied her confidence. There had been a few random makeouts here and there, but nothing to write home about, and I had absolutely no plans that involved a boy, especially at tonight’s party.

“He’s the hottest guy in the entire school. He’s had a girlfriend for the entirety of his high school career, and he’s headed to Berkley after graduation. I’ve waited four years for this, and now is my only chance.”

“I’m here for it. Especially because maybe then I won’t have to hear about him anymore.”

Ignoring my previous comment, Liv continued. “Did you see him yesterday, after lacrosse practice? Holy hell. He’s simply a gift from the gods, I swear.”

“That’s a bit dramatic. But no, I didn’t see him. Unlike you, I don’t stand around after tennis practice pretending to”—I raised my hands to make air quotes—“ practice my serve as I stalk Caleb Davis.”

“I don’t sta—”

“You do,” I cut her off.

She released a loud breath and turned up the music again. The beat drifted through the speakers and the warm salty summer air whipped my hair across my face. Normally I’d be trying to tame it, but not tonight. Tonight, I’d let it run wild, taking in the sights around me.

We might’ve always talked about how ready we were to leave this town, but deep down, we both knew how special this place was to us. There was nowhere quite like it. The place we met, the place we grew up, and the place that would always be home.

“Taking the long way?” I asked.

“Always.”

Montauk wasn’t very big by any means, but any chance we got, Liv and I took the scenic route. It was our favorite, especially during the summer months when the town buzzed with an extra burst of energy from all the out-of-towners who flocked here for the summer.

Neither of us could pass up the opportunity to gawk at the parts of town that were inhabited with mostly empty mansions, massive boats, and the type of eye candy every girl wanted a taste of.

“Can you believe this is our last summer here?” she shouted over the music before cranking the volume down yet again.

A perk of our friendship was that we were always in the other’s head. It happened so often it didn’t even surprise me anymore.

“Honestly? No. It feels like just yesterday we were thirteen, lying on the beach, staring at the stars, and wondering what high school would be like. The boys we’d kiss. The sports we’d play, the dances we’d go to.” My voice trailed off as I reminisced on a time that seemed so far away but somehow still like it was just yesterday.

“It’s wild, you know? The feeling of eagerly wanting high school to come to an end so we can graduate and finally move to New York together, but on other hand, simply wanting this year to last forever so that we never have to grow up and leave this place.” Liv’s voice wavered slightly at the end, only enough that I would pick up on it.

Liv and I both applied to NYU, along with a few other backup schools, in hopes we’d get to go to college together. It’d always been our dream to graduate high school and take on the big city. Liv planned to study architecture, and I wanted to study creative writing.

We hadn’t heard anything yet though. We never talked about it, but I knew the unknown hung over both of our heads.

“Olivia Mitchell…”

“What?”

“Are you getting sentimental on me?”

“No,” she breathed. “Okay, maybe. But it’s just that—”

“Liv, I’m messing with you. I get it. We’re sort of in that limbo phase. While these are some of the best years of our lives and we have a friendship that most people won’t ever experience, we also have a whole hell of a lot of unknowns in front of us. It’s okay to feel a little unsure about everything.”

“What if one of us doesn’t get into NYU?”

I knew that was where she was headed. Anytime she got emotional, it was because of this.

We’d never been apart for longer than two weeks in our entire lives, and the thought of one of us not being accepted made us both extremely anxious.

“Don’t go there, not tonight. We’ve got time. Tonight, let’s focus on the task at hand: Caleb Davis.” I smiled at her, hoping she’d let it go for now.

Just as quickly as she got sentimental, she snapped out of it.

“Damn, MJ, when did you become the level-headed one between the two of us?”

“Ha-ha, you’re kidding, right? I’m one hundred percent always the level-headed one in this relationship,” I replied.

“Uh huh, whatever makes you sleep better at night.”

Looking through the open sunroof at the stars illuminating the night sky, I let my mind wander.

When the car stopped we weren’t at Caleb’s house, we were parked at the beach.

I looked over at Liv.

“I’m not parking at his house. If his party gets busted like it did last year, we need to have an out.”

“Are you not planning on drinking?” I asked.

“Oh, we are planning on drinking, but I’ll just leave my car here overnight. Caleb’s house is only a few blocks away.”

“My girl. Always thinking ahead.” I grinned in her direction as I unbuckled my seat belt.

We stepped out of the car, shut our doors, and rearranged ourselves in the windows.

“Ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,” she replied.

“Let’s go get Caleb Davis.”