Chapter Thirty
Lennox
Hellfire, but Meg was innocent in many ways. How could one have lived and never seen a dolphin? But then he thought on the fact that she had lived inland so was probably unfamiliar.
“There. Look into the sound. It’s a distance away, but you can see what looks like a big fish coming out of the water, only to go back in. They’re verra graceful creatures, swimming above and below the water as if they need to breathe as much as we do. And they can be verra fast, can keep up with any smaller boat if they like. They have a smile that makes them appear quite friendly. They’re rarely alone, usually with several others, and they chatter like birds. If we had the time, I’d take you closer, but by the look of the clouds, I think we may have a downpour coming. There’s a burn not far ahead, and I would bet a cave not far from it.”
They traveled for a bit when she said, “You never answered my other question, Lennox.”
He gave her a perplexed look, tipping his head. “I have forgotten. Ask again.”
“What are you looking for in a wife? I don’t know much about these things, so think of me kindly if I am being rude.”
He thought for a moment, intermittently checking the cloud cover as they moved along at a steady pace. If he were being honest, he’d give her the simplest answer—someone like her. But he gave it careful consideration because it was important. “The obvious characteristics pop into my head. I would like someone kind and considerate, but I want my wife to be intelligent and thoughtful. I have issues with women who spend their time worrying about appearances and wanting more and more coin. Probably not something you have experienced, but anytime I was forced to go to the royal court with my sire, I was often offended by the women there, women who would push their breasts at me as if that makes them more attractive, or women bold enough to touch me where they shouldn’t be touching. I could go on, but you have the idea.”
Lennox shrugged as he led their horses down a different path next to a burn, the air taking a sudden cool shift. “She would have to understand the running of the clans, should be as good with numbers as I am. She should be able to read and write, yet so many women do not and don’t care to learn. But most of all, I’m looking for a woman who would love me for who I am, not for what I am.”
“I don’t understand.”
He thought about the best way to explain his meaning to someone as innocent as Meg. “Some women wish to marry me so they will have servants to wait on their every wish, or to live in a castle, order all their gowns to be made for them, not because they are interested in me, or care to hear my thoughts on issues. It’s about the status of being a chieftain’s wife.” He nearly snorted. “Do you know that some men believe love is foolish? I don’t. I wish to have a woman who takes hold of my heart and pulls on it. Every time I look at her.”
Now Meg was totally confused. “Yet you didn’t mention beauty.”
“I don’t care if she is beautiful.” He stopped and rolled one hand back and forth. “I mean, she should be pleasing to the eyes, but others think I am foolish because I wish to marry a woman who incites a desire in me unlike any other. That with just a glance, I want her.”
“I never would have expected that as an answer. My thanks for sharing.” The puzzled expression on her face told him he’d confused her more, but he decided to let it go. He’d said enough on the subject.
Again, he thought, A woman like you, Meg . Every time he caught a glimpse of her, he had images of tasting her everywhere, of plunging into her until she screamed his name at the height of her pleasure, that she would cling to him as if he were the only man who existed. This one woman had incited so many carnal images that Lennox had a difficult time controlling his thoughts. He had an undeniable craving to watch her when she found her pleasure, to see that expression on her face caused by the pinnacle of pleasure coursing through her body.
To feel her innermost contractions squeeze him until he could take no more. Unlike most of the women he’d had who would lie there until he finished, no matter how he tried to incite passion in them.
He glanced over his shoulder in time to see the sky turn dark, about to unleash a fury on them. It was nearly dusk, they had dried meat and cheese and two skins of water, so they would be fine in the cave. They just had to get there and find a spot for their mounts before the sky dropped its worst on them.
Lennox approached the waterfall, expecting to find a cave behind it, and to their good fortune, he did, though it was small. Heavy woodland on one side of the cave would suit the animals. “I’ll settle them if you grab the saddlebags and get them inside before they are drenched.”
He helped Meg dismount and untied the two bags as the first drops of rain fell. He hooked the beasts to the bushes, then gave them each something to eat just before the sky let loose, and he raced to the opening of the cave.
The Highland gray clouds poured, unleashing a storm not uncommon to the Hebrides. He made it underneath cover with only getting a bit wet. Meg made her way around the small cave, he guessed to check for anything she didn’t like.
He came up behind her. “Searching for cobwebs?”
“Nay,” she said, turning back to him. “A nice flat surface to sleep on.”
“Smart and practical. I think we are indeed here for the night. We should be at Drimnin by high sun on the morrow.”
“Where will we look for Egan?”
“That I’m not worried about. Drimnin is small. A wee village with several fishermen’s huts. One small chapel that isn’t always occupied. They don’t have horses, just boats because they live off the sea. If they need anything, they head to Tobermory. You’ll see. You’ll be able to see Rankin Castle, where Rowan lives, from the beach there.”
“Why do people live there if it’s so isolated?” she asked, pulling out the fur Isaac had given her and wrapping it around her shoulders.
“Because it’s beautiful. They’re verra happy people. They swim and fish and farm a bit. Raise their bairns. Build boats and go across for entertainment or any supplies they need. It’s a simple life but a pleasant one, I think.”
“And Egan would be there? That doesn’t sound like the place for a man who would steal children.”
“Aye, you are correct in that.” Meg did have a quick mind. She questioned things that others would never consider. “He is probably inland, is my guess. They can put into the water in various places because the coast is level in areas. But his cottage will be isolated, somewhere no one will be able to see what he’s up to. I would guess deep in the woods, a bit behind the village. It’s quite a business when you’re near water. Get the word out about what goods you have, set up a time for delivery or pickup, and you’ve got coin. The shameful part is he’s selling bairns.”
“For what?”
This was something he wasn’t ready to discuss completely with the lass. She was too innocent. “As slaves to work. Wash clothes, dig gardens. They wanted me to carry stones to build a curtain wall. Those kinds of things, among others.” That was as far as he would go. “I put some wrapped food from the inn in my bag. Are you hungry?”
They ate the dried meat and cheese as the rain continued, sitting on a boulder not far from the opening. The constant dripping at the front of the cave rang out even louder than the waterfall a short distance away. When the rain slowed, Lennox crept out into the dark to check on the horses, pleased to find them settled and mostly dry.
When he came back inside the cave, he was surprised to see Meg standing just behind the water, staring into the dark as if transfixed.
“Meg, are you hale?”
She nodded, swallowing hard, something he wondered about, but decided to let her speak when she was ready. Her mind churned with so many new thoughts that she must be struggling to work through them, but he didn’t know what bothered her the most. He would give her whatever time she needed.
“I feel ignorant and foolish, Lennox. Do you think that of me?” She turned to face him, her expression obscured in the dark.
Was she crying?
“Nay, I have never thought of you as ignorant and foolish, Meg. Innocent, perhaps. But not foolish. Why do you feel that way?”
“Because I know nothing about how the world works. I have never been to a royal court. Have no idea what that even means. I’m not sure I know who the king of England is. I don’t even know what a dolphin is. How do I fix this?”
Lennox crossed his arms and said, “You don’t need fixing, Meg. Mayhap you don’t know some things, but I don’t know how to sew a sweater or how to plant beans.” He reached over and brushed a stray hair away from her face. “You are a quick learner, so ask questions, and I’ll teach you whatever I can. I think you are near perfect the way you are. Strong, honest, compassionate, kind. There’s naught wrong with you. Mayhap a bit stubborn, but then again, so am I.” He smiled.
“Stubborn? Am I?”
“Aye, lass. You are, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.”
She looked out at the rain again, thinking over what he’d said.
“Lennox, I feel that I should be in charge of my own destiny. Is that not true in your eyes? Because I’m a lass, does someone else have to tell me what to do all the time?”
This was a harsh reality for most women, though his mother would tell any woman she controlled her own destiny. But for the masses, the poor, the peasants in the village, the men controlled them completely. “In my eyes, you are on your own. You are a strong, independent woman who should make her own decisions about her life. You don’t need to be controlled. I hope to see you connect with your sister, so she can also give you advice. Everyone needs someone to consult with when they’re confused, especially when they’re young.” He didn’t know where she was going with all this, but he was afraid to guess.
She took a deep breath and asked, “I would like to ask you to show me. I’m guessing it’s not a conventional request, but I think somehow I’m different from most lasses you meet. I need to understand intimacy. Show me what goes on between a man and a woman, what it means to be intimate. Show me how bairns are made.”
Lennox nearly choked, but he thought he held himself together quite well. He’d like nothing better to make her his, but the lass was in a vulnerable state and had no idea what she was talking about.
At least, he guessed she was completely innocent.
“Your mother never discussed this with you?”
“Nay, she died over ten years ago. We were too young. Tamsin and I would try to discuss it based on the few things we heard from some of the neighborhood lasses, but we never understood it. They talked about the maidenhead. What exactly is a lass’s maidenhead?”
Hellfire, but he was in for a long night.