13. Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Thirteen
Mac
“I’m gay.”
The statement earns me a quirk of the brow that disappears behind the bill of my bodyguard’s hat and the flick of a fry in my direction.
I swear I remember seeing a list of definitions that piqued my interest. Things about intimacy and sexuality that had me wondering if Jordan thought I was questioning myself.
Is he trying to educate himself to help me?
Maybe I was just dreaming .
“And?” he mumbles as he lets us into the back of my sister-in-law’s store.
My answer dies in the flurry of chaos that surrounds us, a clothing rack nearly clipping me when I enter.
“Sorry!”
Jordan grabs me, his hand on my arm heating my skin, and puts himself in front of me.
“Stay close,” he murmurs as he begins to weave us through the maze of people and wheeled displays, the back of his shirt fisted in my grip.
I’ve never seen this place so busy.
“No wonder Aria needed someone to come get the Hell spawn.” I spot the dino-nugget-printed pj’s through the throngs of people and start pushing Jordan in my niblings direction.
Aria stands when we reach their little huddle and grabs my face hard enough to smoosh my cheeks. “ Macaroni. ”
“Hey, baby girl.” I offer her a grin when she pulls me down ’til her face fills my vision.
“Fucking thank you ,” she whispers, then releases me. “My assistant’s hands are already full, and they will not leave her be.”
I snort and nod, crouching next to the twins who squeal in greeting and toss away the toys in their sticky hands.
“Uncle Mackie!”
I’m sandwiched between the two tiny humans, both sets of arms threatening to strangle me when I wrap my arms around them and stand.
“Peeball, Mackie. Peeballs ,” my namesake yells into my right ear and I swing my narrowed gaze at him. “ Unckie ,” he corrects, then slams his head against my shoulder and rubs his cheek against my shirt like a cat. “Pweez.”
I try to hide my snicker as Elle threads little fingers into my hair from my left. “Where’s your daddy?”
Elle shrugs. “Getting dressed or somefin’.”
I catch Aria’s nod as she tucks her phone back into her pocket with a grin. “Part of this mess, like always,” she says with pride, though she pretends to be annoyed. “I’ll need you back here later, once all this has calmed down.”
Nodding, I tighten my grip on the beasts in my arms and turn toward Jordan. “Ready?”
“Yeah!” Makkin exclaims, fist pumping the air, his little head still on my shoulder. “Peeballs, peeballs, peeballs.”
Jordan swallows and spins away, another muttered “Stay close” off his lips as he leads us back through the working mob and out into the blazing sunlight.
We walk down the alleyway, Makkin slumping in my arms with each step closer to the empty section of the building, Elle still twirling my curls.
Well, not so empty .
While the original owner of this storefront has refused to sell it to anyone, he does charge us rent to keep it that way and in turn, we provide the security.
Which means that we sometimes use this space.
Over the years, I’ve collected a few things that just don’t move well. Things I would legit cry over if any part of it got damaged. Things that take me back to my teenage dirtbag days with my brother and all the games he lost to me. So, when we all agreed to keep our homebase closer to Ma and the town that two of my four brother’s partners are from, I stashed the shit here.
And it still brings a smile to my face when Jordan drops the paper bag he’s been carrying to pull the drop cloth from the first Pac-Man inspired pinball machine and plug in the actual arcade tower right next to it.
It’s only the two units for now, but I’ve got my eye on more.
“ Peeballs ,” Makkin whispers in awe.
“Uh-huh. Pinball.” I maneuver their little bodies so I can drop into one of the folding chairs and prop them on each of my knees. “But lunch first.”
Jordan sits next to me and starts handing out little boxes of nuggets. Elle nibbles, while Makkin shoves an entire fistful into his mouth.
My own box is tucked into my hand, but with the little bodies against me, I can’t reach to actually feed myself without squishing them.
“ Tyro ,” I mutter and throw him a look. “Feed me.”
Navy eyes dart to my mouth when I drop it open, and his throat moves with a swallow. He stares for a long, charged beat, his eyes darkening.
His lips part just slightly.
His breath quickens.
And then I nearly choke when Elle shoves a half-nibbled nugget between my gaping lips.
I cough and chew, swallowing the bite nearly whole as Makkin giggles and jams another nugget against my mouth. “Eat, Unckie!”
Making a show of stealing the nugget from his tiny fingers with my teeth, Elle squeals and wiggles an escape while Makkin just laughs and does it all over again.
By the time the nugs are gone, I feel like my face is covered in grease and breading. The little heathens have retreated to the arcade games with cleaned hands, and I’m in desperate need of a shower.
“Do you want any?”
The question catches me so off guard that I double take my bodyguard.
“Demons?”
Jordan’s hat is pulled low, the bill covering his eyes, making him look guarded. But he nods.
Something squeezes in my chest as I swing my gaze back to the tiny curly-haired heads and matching pj’s. Makkin lets loose a war cry and mashes the button on the pinball while Elle just gently guides the Pac-Man around the little map in the screen, eating away at the white dots.
“Maybe … someday,” I answer, though the doubt is strong.
As much as I want a family, my own little gaggle of Hell raisers, I know that I couldn’t do it alone. Nor would I want to. Having no one to share the little moments with? Moments just like this one where the kids get to experience the same thing I did when I was young? Learning and growing together. Discovering all the things for the first time.
Just me and a kid or two?
That’s more depressing than the idea that I’ll never have them at all.
Because at least then … no one would be missing out on anything.
I shrug in an attempt to dislodge the pang in my chest.
No one except me.