Chapter 34
“I assume you’ll be spending the night?” Mom says to Austin, from the end of the table. Her leg is on a cushion, propped up on a chair. She’s eating well—her lasagna nearly gone—which I’m glad to see. I’ve barely made a dent in my own dinner, my stomach too unsettled to eat.
“I booked a room at the bed-and-breakfast,” Austin says. “I didn’t want to put you out, with everything you have going on.”
“Nonsense,” Dad says, taking a forkful of saucy noodle and cheese. “We’re thrilled to have you.”
“The bed-and-breakfast might work better,” I say. “My bed is only a double. We’ll be a bit squished. We’re used to a king, right?”
“I don’t mind if you don’t mind,” Austin replies, winking at me. Ugh. I used to love that wink.
“It’s settled then,” Mom says, picking up her knife and fork again.
Amelia catches my eye with a You okay? look. I give my head the smallest of shakes, and she nods, a determined set to her mouth.
“I don’t want to put a wrinkle in things, but Libby promised she’d stay over at my place… to, um…”
“To have a girls’ night.” I smile brightly at Amelia, then at Austin. “We need to… tag the candy canes. For the tree lighting. It’s a lot of work for one person.”
Amelia nods. “It is. So much work.”
Dad looks between us, sensing there’s more to this exchange. Then Austin chimes in. “I’m happy to help. If I can sculpt faces with these, I can tie tags onto candy canes.” He holds up his hands, and Mom laughs.
“The more the merrier, right, girls?” Dad says, crumpling his napkin. “I have some paperwork to finish up, but I’ll see you before you head out in the morning.”
“Head out?” I ask, though I know exactly where I’m supposed to be heading out. “Right, back to the city.” I set my fork down. There’s no point in pretending I’m able to eat.
“Back home ,” Austin clarifies, obviously to make his point from earlier. “As much as I’d love to stick around Harmony Hills for Christmas… It’s my favourite season,” he adds, making Mom and Dad smile, and me frown. “Elizabeth and I have a plane to catch.”
Back home.
There’s a plaque that has hung in the Munro dining room for as long as I can remember.
It never comes down, even at Christmastime, when Mom needs every inch of space she can get for the holiday decorations.
I painted it when I was six years old, carefully following the stenciled letters on the heart-shaped wooden plaque.
It’s crudely done, the paint outside of the lines in more than one spot.
It was a Christmas present for my parents, and Millicent Mueller helped me—ever patient as I sat at her kitchen table, my paints and brushes strewn across the plastic tablecloth she always set down for crafts. The plaque reads HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS .
The city is not home. This is home —Harmony Hills, where my family, friends, neighbours, and, most unexpectedly, a kindhearted man with gorgeous green eyes and sexy-as-heck dimples live.
“Excuse me,” I mumble, pushing my chair back quickly. “I just remembered a call I have to make.”
“You okay, Sissy?” Amelia asks quietly as I brush past her. I nod, but she catches the stricken look on my face. Then I hear her getting up from the table to come after me, followed by Austin saying, “I’ll go,” right before I open the front door and step outside.
It’s dark, the moon lighting a path through the snow, which glitters under the streetlamps. The snap of cold brings goose bumps to my exposed skin, and I shiver as I gulp in a few shallow breaths. Everything’s a mess, and I am not coping well.
Austin opens the front door moments later. He’s wearing his coat, and he turns up the collar against the cold. It occurs to me he has not brought me my coat, nor is he offering me his, even though I’m clearly shivering.
“Are you all right?” he asks. There’s sincerity and genuine concern in his voice, and I feel a moment of regret for what I need to do.
I sigh, my teeth chattering. “Not really.”
“What’s going on?” Austin gently takes my arm, turning me towards him. “Elizabeth, tell me.”
“You wouldn’t believe me, even if I could figure out how to explain it,” I say quietly, with a mirthless laugh.
“Try me.”
Try me. Austin is science-minded and pragmatic, so a time-travelling narrative is going to be a nonstarter. But what do I have to lose? There is no relationship to salvage. Plus, I’m tired of hiding from everyone the truth about what’s really going on with me.
“Fine,” I say, after a beat. “I’ve come back here from the future. From next Christmas, specifically. And we’re not together anymore, Austin. We break up in September. There’s a toilet-paper-roll situation and we fight about it, and then it’s over , just like that.”
Austin looks amused, his lips turning up into a smile. “Toilet-paper-roll situation?”
“I’m serious, Austin. Amelia gets married next Christmas; oh, and she’s pregnant—yes, my baby sister is having a baby,” I say, when Austin raises an eyebrow.
“And I was supposed to go to Mexico to drink margaritas for Christmas, but Helly couldn’t go with me, and then Amelia called to ask me to be her maid of honour, and then a pig named Mary Piggins knocked me out cold at the ceremony, and when I woke up I was here .
” I take in a big breath. “Except here is actually last Christmas.”
Austin watches me, his expression difficult to read. For a second, I wonder if I’ve misjudged him, but then he laughs. “Were you and Amelia day drinking?”
I shake my head. What did you expect, Libby? “I understand this is… impossible to comprehend. But I assure you—it’s last Christmas, and I’m reliving everything. Except… everything is also different? I don’t understand it either, like, at all. But it’s happening.”
His smile fades. “Oh, you’re not joking.”
I shake my head.
“Are you concussed? Did you pass out when you were sick, knock yourself out?” Austin frowns, raises his hands to my head to feel around for a bump. I duck out of the way.
“Stop, please. I told you I’m fine,” I say.
“This doesn’t seem like ‘fine’ to me,” he replies. “I know we’re supposed to be getting on a flight soon, but I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
I let out a long breath. “Exactly, that’s what I’ve been trying to say. You and I, we aren’t—”
“Where’s the nearest ER?” Austin pulls his phone from his back pocket, starts typing something into the search bar. “Does your mom have privileges?”
“What? No, I’m not going to the hospital, Austin.”
“The hell you’re not. You need a CT,” Austin says, reading his phone screen. “Westhaven… How far away is that?”
I’ve seen this side of Austin before, and I used to love his take-charge, confidence-for-days self.
Tonight, however, it’s problematic. Big mistake, Libby.
I needed to be honest, but about our relationship status…
not offering some far-fetched tale. I know he isn’t going to let it go, which means I’m going to have to be explicit: Things are over between us.
Otherwise, he’ll toss me over his shoulder and get me into a CT scanner by the end of the night, regardless of how much I protest.
“I don’t need a hospital,” I say firmly, and then add before he disagrees, “Give me a second to explain, okay?”
He nods.
“Yes, I did pass out the night I was sick—it was seconds, literally,” I say, noting how his frown deepens. I’m scrambling, looking for a way to explain my unbelievable story and diffuse the situation. “I didn’t hit my head, but I’ve been having… strange dreams ever since.”
“Have you had headaches?”
I shake my head. “I told you, I’m not concussed.”
“Nausea or vomiting?” he asks, ignoring me.
“Nope. No headaches, no dizziness, no nausea or vomiting. Just odd dreams,” I say, adding, “Very realistic, though.”
It’s a weak explanation, but surely he’ll want to believe this is nothing more than the aftereffects of a bad case of food poisoning. Who wouldn’t?
Austin presses his lips together, his blue eyes scanning my face. “So what was all that stuff before. About Christmas past? About your sister?”
“Like I said, very, very weird dreams. That’s it.” I keep my voice even, hold eye contact. I’m about to say, “Hey, also? I think we need to talk about us…” but before I get the words out, Austin pulls me against him, wrapping his arms around me. I know I’ve missed my moment.
“I’m glad it’s nothing more,” he says, leaning back to look me in the eyes. “But I’m sorry I wasn’t here to take care of you, babe.”
“It’s okay. I know you don’t do sickness.” I smile as brightly as I can, then gently extricate myself with an exaggerated shiver. “Hey, let’s go back inside. I’m freezing.”
“Sure. Your parents mentioned an ice-skating thing tonight?” Austin says, opening the front door. “You up for it? I’d love to see more of this town, though I’m sure that won’t take long.”
He laughs at his own joke, but I don’t join him.
“Aren’t you tired after that long drive?” I ask, my tone mild. “We can skip it.”
I don’t want to go ice-skating with Austin.
First of all, I want to get Austin out of this house and back to the city.
Without me, though I haven’t yet sorted that one out yet.
I know I need to break up with him—again, in this timeline—but I’d prefer to do it when I’m steadier.
Most definitely not in my childhood home, with my family underfoot.
Truthfully, I’d prefer not to do it at all.
Maybe I won’t have to, if time somehow resets itself.
More than all of this, however, it’s about Liam. He’s going to be at the rink tonight, and I’m not at all prepared for my two worlds to collide. I was sort of hoping to put that awkwardness off, say, forever.
“I’m not tired. You know I can pull an all-nighter and then do surgery the next day.” Austin hangs up his coat, giving me another practiced wink. “I won’t take no for an answer.”