The Earl and the Wedding Crasher (The Brides of Elderglen #3)

Chapter 10

CHAPTER TEN

" M y lady," Ellis said, lips pressed into the thin line of disapproval that lately had not been quite as devastating to her soul as it had started out being. "Your guests are waiting."

Louisa glanced up from her mirror, carefully checking that the shadows beneath her eyes from her disturbed nights were not so great as to start The Chorus, as she liked to call it when her sisters were started on something to worry about. "Thank you, Ellis, I am aware."

"They are asking when you shall be ready, my lady," Ellis said. "May I give them an indication?"

"Indicate away, Ellis," Louisa said lightly. "I shall be done when I am done. They are familiar enough with me to have patience."

Ellis, who was spiritually training to be Mrs. Brook's' apprentice, Louisa felt, made a curtsey that implied many things about how she felt about guests being patient and left the room. Louisa was mostly dressed anyway, she was simply putting off having to be under the careful loving eyes of those who knew her so well.

Would they immediately be able to tell how confusing and strange her new life was? How much of a failure she felt in her position most days? How the servants were dubious of her and the children were barely accepting her and her own husband had only ever wanted a woman to help care rear the children he so clearly cared for but was still so clearly uncertain about being himself around them and trusting his instincts.

Evelina would know something was wrong and then Margaret and Penelope would pry it out of her with skills that the military should use in all of their engagements while Alexandra made plans that she would never admit to but which would be terrifying and competently thought out.

I am doomed , Louisa thought to herself drolly. I am absolutely doomed. I may as well surrender to it now and at least enjoy my time with them.

That decided, she fixed her hair and ensured that she was otherwise presentable before leaving the sanctuary of her room and going down to find her sisters settled in the drawing room, talking animatedly together.

Evelina was dressed in a lovely gown of dark blue that offset her eyes and was sitting with her arm threaded through Margaret's. Margaret was leaning her head on Evelina's shoulder and it again struck Louisa that the two of them must surely have planned to be married to two close friends.

There was never going to be a time when Evelina and Margaret could easily be apart from each other for long.

She paused in the doorway to listen, letting the familiar noise of home wash over her.

"...Eliza then told me that she thought babies were quite lovely but that if it was all the same she would rather not have any!" Evelina was saying as Penelope had both hands clapped over her mouth to stop herself from dissolving into hearty laughter.

"Oh she is so wonderful," she said merrily as soon as she could contain herself. "I am so happy she is feeling more confident and comfortable with herself. She will be quite as forthright as I am before you know it!"

"Let us not go so far," Evelina said drolly. "You are of course my very dearest youngest sister, Penelope, but I would not have you duplicated for the whole world."

Louisa couldn't help but laugh at that. "I do not think that the world could manage it, two Penelopes would have the whole of society turned upside down."

Penelope tipped up her nose pertly. "And it would be better for it!"

"Perhaps, perhaps not," Alexandra said, crossing to embrace Louisa warmly. "Dear sister, it has felt so long since I last saw you!"

When Alexandra wrapped around her Louisa felt as though all of her tension and worry was melted away. It was such a safe and familiar place to be, in her sister's embrace, surrounded by family. Surely nothing could be completely terrible if they were still with her.

"Too long," she said softly, trying not to let them hear the lump in her through. "Too long indeed. But we are all together today, Evelina, Margaret - it is so rare to have your graces with us alone!"

Margaret made a noise that no Duchess would ever make and then followed immediately by trying to throw a cushion at Louisa, who ducked and let it fly over her head and be caught by Alexandra just before it could hit Mrs. Brooks in the face.

" Ahem ," Mrs. Brooks said slowly, not seeming to be quite sure how to react to a duchess throwing a cushion at her. "The carriage is ready, my lady." Then she curtseyed to Margaret and a second time to Evelina for good measure before withdrawing.

Evelina's eyes were dancing even though her voice was stern. "Now see what you've done, Margaret. Louisa's housekeeper will think she is quite the corrupting influence."

"Nonsense!" Margaret said stoutly, getting up and straightening her gown. "If anyone corrupted anyone, I corrupted her . I am older ."

"The only way, truly, to be certain to be the corrupting force," Alexandra said dryly as they made their way out towards the carriage. Louisa laughed softly. Everything was so easy with her sisters. Had she ever truly appreciated that when this was all she had to be?

"So," Evelina said as the carriage rumbled along the road to the city. "How is married life?"

"Please do not give us any sickening details about romance," Penelope said, winking at her. "But if he's being mean to you let me know and I will do something about it."

Louisa had a moment of trying to figure out what her little sister might do to a fully grown earl when she was distracted by Margaret taking her hand in her own and squeezing it hard.

"Are you happy?" she asked, in the way that only bright, honest Margaret could. She went straight to the heart of the matter, no matter how hard. "Are you being taken care of?"

"Is the Earl being kind to you?" Evelina put in, her voice warm and gentle. "I know the two of you did not form an acquaintance in the best of circumstances, but my dearest Dunmore assures me he is a good man."

"Are you managing at the estate?" Alexandra put in before Louisa could say a word. "They are not overworking you, are they?"

"Or making you unhappy?" Penelope said, threateningly.

"Sisters, sisters!" Louisa held up her hands, only slightly hampered by the grip that Margaret had on her. "Please, be assured that I am very content! I am managing my household, my husband is a kind and generous man and my life is better than I ever dreamed it might be."

As a woman, all of them looked unconvinced and it was so thoroughly ridiculous to be trying to convince them of her happiness when she was indeed not un happy, but confused and tired and frustrated that Louisa had to laugh a little at the absurdity of the situation.

"It is not that I do not believe you, dear Louisa," Margaret said, squeezing her hand again. "I am delighted to hear that it is going so well. But I do remember how difficult it was to be married to a complete stranger. The sudden closeness where there is no familiarity can be so lonely."

"I promise you, I am happy," Louisa said, less convincingly than before. She could hear it in her own voice and as their expressions became more concerns she pulls her hand from Margaret to use it to cover her face. "Oh I am not so unhappy, sisters. But my husband is the world's most annoying and frustrating man! It is impossible to understand him!"

The silence that had fallen over the carriage was inviting, and Louisa felt as though she could finally speak of everything that had been bothering her over her time at St Vincent.

"He flirts with me whenever I want to just talk to him! And he looks at me with such a look, like he's trying to look through me. And he calls me all these names, not like that Penelope, but confusing ones. Sweet wife when he barely wanted to marry me to begin with. Sometimes he seems kind and sincere and others he turns around and starts saying ridiculous things to make me annoyed with him so I will go away…" she looked up and noticed the twinkle in Evelina's eyes and groaned. "I assure you, Evelina, it is quite the most annoyed I have ever been."

"Clearly," Evelina said. "He seems to make you feel a lot of things, sister."

"A man who is both kind and flirtatious," Alexandra said, smiling a little. "How terrible."

"It almost sounds like you are trying to find reasons to hate him," Penelope said, crowding up to throw her arms around Louisa's neck. "And like you can't quite make yourself!"

That was the most ridiculous thing Louisa had ever heard. She didn't hate Cedric. But she certainly didn't like him. She was neutral. Neutral completely. Very business-like and proper. That was how she felt.

But that was just not something that she had words to explain to her sisters.

"I am glad things are going so well," Evelina said, smiling calmly as Louisa made a noise of annoyance and was promptly kissed on either cheek by Penelope and Margaret.

Margaret, being assured that her sister was not in fact wasting away in a lonely, loveless marriage, started a discussion on babies and the difficulties in raising them, something that all sisters were immediately distracted by as the carriage drove on.

"Is this not quite an expensive place?" Louisa asked for the tenth time as her sisters led her up the stairs of the modiste's shop. Her own experiences shopping for dresses had never been this fine. In fact she had always preferred a dove gray or a light brown gown so that she could more easily blend into the background. Nothing eye-catching or bright, no colors that might draw strangers to her.

And certainly nothing so fashionable as she could see on the dress forms in the shop before her. Such an array of fine silks, lace and ribbons, glistening beads and buttons and coats and buckles were in front of them that it was dizzying.

"My dear," Evelina lowered her voice and spoke in the way that she was wont to when she was trying to educate without embarrassing. "The Earl of St Vincent is one of the wealthiest men in the country. You are his wife. You must dress accordingly."

"You must in fact," Margaret said pertly from her other side, "dress better than most any other woman at the party you are going to. I am quite looking forward to seeing it!"

"You have never let me put you in something that would be truly becoming," Evelina added. "Now you have no choice in the matter, Louisa. You will be expected to dress well."

"I may be expected to," Louisa said quietly and firmly, having learned how from dealing with Mrs. Brooks. "But that is not my intention. After the wedding everyone will be inclined to look at me and I have no interest in drawing their gazes further by wearing something fancy. I shall have an appropriate but simple dress and that shall be that."

"Louisa," Evelina said, eyebrows up in surprise, but Louisa was already walking away towards the shop owner, letting her sisters follow on.

Oh they were probably right, but she could not do it. She could not go into that party where everyone would already be talking about her and feel the eyes of those strangers on her skin. When people looked at her it felt like they were touching her, like she couldn't bear it and had to hide and run away.

She could not add to that by wearing an expensive and fashionable gown, it would be too much. It would be too, too much.

"My lady," the modiste said, dropping into a curtsey. "Welcome. It is a pleasure to have you here today. May I show you the latest satins we have in from Europe?"

"No, thank you," Louisa said calmly, ignoring the way that Alexandra had taken her arm and was trying to get her attention. "May I look at some pearl grey crepe for the petticoat? Something demure."

The lady, who was small and round and creased like a prune looked up with surprise at her. "My lady, I cannot!"

"But this is what I want," Louisa said, feeling a flash of frustration. Why was it that everyone seemed to think that they could tell her what she was allowed to dress like now she was a married woman? Surely she was at last mistress of her own household! "Why are you not able to provide me with what I want to order?"

"Of course I can provide it," the little woman said. "But first I must provide you with the finest and most expensive dress that I can create. Lord St Vincent has sent word yesterday that he will not accept anything less for his new bride. It must be the finest of satins and he has paid extra to have it embroidered and beaded before the event. Perhaps you would care to pick out the shade of satin?"

She gestured with a wrinkled hand that had so many rings on it that Louisa was not sure how she bent her fingers enough to sew and Louisa nodded slowly. She felt like she might burn up with embarrassment and anger. How dare he decide what she was to wear without even asking her about it? And to pick something, ask for something so expensive, so eye-catching. It made her want to blush and hide her face and also to stomp her feet and shout at him at once!

"Very well, could you bring out some samples and my sisters will help me choose."

The modiste nodded and disappeared into some back room of the shop, leaving Louisa to spin around and glare accusingly at all four sisters, who were trying very hard not to laugh at her. "Did you know about this?"

"Not at all," Evelina said. "But it is not unexpected. You must look well or you will be making him look bad."

"You cannot be surprised," Margaret added. "He is a very powerful man. He will be known in all the best shops and they will be quite used to getting such orders from him."

"I am sure everyone is quite used to it," Louisa said, pinching her lips together. "This, this is what makes him so annoying to me! He is used to doing whatever he likes and so he does, always . No matter what I think or say he just does what he likes!"

"Of course he does what he likes," Margaret said with a droll tone. "He's an earl. I don't know if you have noticed, my dear, but gentlemen of his rank do tend to be able to do what they like."

"Not when it comes to me, he cannot!" Louisa said sharply. "He cannot dress me up like a doll and expect me to be happy about it. I don't like it. I don't like him deciding how I should look."

"Louisa," Evelina said in her soft, calm voice. "He simply wants to ensure that you look well. It is perfectly normal for a man like him to want to ensure that his family appears correctly at a social event."

"But I -"

Evelina shook her head, cutting her off as Margaret gave her a little hug around her waist. "You are a countess now, Louisa," and now she had her motherly tone, her 'you should listen to me for I know what is best for you' tone. "You will need to get used to people looking at you."

Perhaps they were right, but as Louisa watched the atelier being out reams of beautiful, sparkling cloth she felt her resentment grow for this man who wanted to drag her out of the shadows.