Two
Liv
W e spent the next few hours scavenging in the houses surrounding our temporary base, gathering tinned food, boxes of crackers, toiletries and clothes for both of us, including my current ensemble of a long-sleeve grey tee and black jeans—in my size, no less. It made me feel cleaner wearing items that weren’t connected to the violence in Melbourne and left me mentally prepped to take on another day of unpredictable events.
When we were done for the morning, Cruz opened the driver's door of the car that we’d packed to capacity with our supplies.
Before he could climb in, I slipped the key from his hand and gazed up at him from my too-close position. The memory of his rough voice telling me he wanted to be inside me kept playing over and over in my mind, and it took a conscious effort to pretend everything had gone back to normal between us.
“What’s… happening here?” he asked with a frown.
"I think you should be the passenger princess this time around."
We planned to travel an hour on this leg of the journey, which would take us a third of the way to Bridgehill. Staying on the road any longer increased our chances of having car trouble, and neither of us wanted to be stranded between towns in the dark. Our next stop was a place I knew of from the old days called Wallin.
As my fingers closed around the keys, he grabbed my wrist and held it captive against his chest. "Sure you can handle it?” he asked, his eyes warm with amusement. “You haven't driven in years."
"I haven't done a lot of things in years, but I'm pretty sure it's like riding a bike. You climb on board, get a nice steady rhythm going, and it all comes back to you." I smiled sweetly to offset the sultry tone in my voice, my faux innocence not fooling him for a second.
Cruz looked like he wanted to forget all about restraining himself and drag me back inside to finish what he'd started. His thumb slid over the pulse point in my wrist, the heat in his eyes almost unbearable to witness. A long moment passed by where neither of us seemed to know what to do next, then he finally said, “Better get in the car, mi amor ."
I had no idea how my jelly legs could still work after that, but when his hold on me loosened, I somehow slid into the driver's seat and shut the door behind me. My breaths were too loud in the sudden silence, my heart beating too fast. While he went around to the passenger side, I adjusted the seat first, then the rearview mirror, catching sight of my sensitive skin, now crimson and hot to the touch. Unfortunately, I had no control over that, so I focused on calming my breathing and reminded myself not to play those games with him while we were out in the open.
He jumped in the passenger side, and we fastened our seatbelts, the tension between us palpable.
The engine turned over on the first try, so I shoved the car in reverse. “I’m sorry," I said. "I shouldn’t have teased you like that.” I backed up until I had enough room to swing around and move from the dirt to the bitumen.
“Hmm. Turns out it wasn’t just the kiss that was problematic. It’s your voice and the way you look at me, too.”
“So, everything then?” I glanced his way as I put the car in drive and cruised down the empty street. “And by problematic you mean…” My gaze dropped to the front of his jeans.
He stared out the windshield without confirming or denying my suspicion, the hint of a smile on his lips. “Eyes on the road, querida. ”
Right. As if I could concentrate after that .
I smiled and returned my attention to the front, trying to push it from my mind and focus on the current task.
It was strange being in control of a car after spending nearly a decade either walking or catching public transport, but it didn't take long to get the feel for it again. My dad had been such a patient, consistent teacher that his instructions came flooding back, and it was almost like having him in my head as I approached each intersection.
When I eased out onto the deserted highway, Cruz and I moved our attention in all directions, checking for hidden vehicles or hordes of the dead. All the while, I ignored the way his body filled the car, and I tried not to pay attention to the relaxed spread of his legs or the muscled thigh resting beside the gear shifter.
I gave three of the infected a wide berth and glanced at the endless paddocks surrounding us. Not a house in sight. Just dry grass and wire fences, with towering trees lining the roadside that swayed in the breeze. I appreciated the contrast to the city. When there were no buildings around to demonstrate how deserted our country had become, I could almost kid myself into thinking nothing had changed, and that people were still living as they used to in a world that hadn't been decimated.
"How do you think the dead end up in the middle of nowhere like this?" I mused out loud. "There's nothing around, no towns nearby. No people to eat."
Cruz looked out the passenger window as he answered. "They just start walking and keep moving, gathering corpses along the way like a deadly snowball."
"Have you come across many hordes?" I'd only seen one cluster passing through the city from the safety of my balcony, a group of around thirty or so moving down Douglas Street like a parade of horrors. Then I remembered the circumstances in which Cruz had lost his brother, and I wanted to kick myself. Being forced to end a loved one's life with a gun or watch him being ripped apart by a horde… I couldn't imagine the pain a decision like that must have caused him. "Sorry," I said, "I wasn't thinking."
"We all have shit to deal with," he said, keeping his head turned away. "That's my depressing story. You've got your own."
My most recent one being Haruto. I still hadn't come to terms with him giving up his life so that I had permission to live mine. How could you accept someone sacrificing themselves to make your existence easier? It was impossible. Before we could lose the upbeat mood that we kicked off with this morning, I changed the subject. "Have you thought about how we're going to screen any new people we meet on the way to Bridgehill?"
Cruz looked over at me and gave me a faint smile. "We'll use the skills I've honed during my time on the job, and your intuition to work out who belongs with us."
"Really?" I scoffed as I swerved around a fallen tree branch that took up half the road. "I'm a woman, so that must mean I have some intrinsic sense of who's trustworthy?"
He moved to a more comfortable position, lifting his hips momentarily in a way that shouldn't have been distracting, but I'd apparently become a sex-starved lunatic in the time since I'd known him. "Intuition, gut feeling, whatever you want to call it—yeah, that's what I'm saying."
"And where do you get that idea?"
"Women are physically smaller. More vulnerable than men," he said, his tone conversational. "You spend your lives paying attention to visual and verbal cues to stay safe." He slanted me an understanding look, as if acknowledging it wasn't fair. "You took days to approach me for the first time, and that routine of yours was all about improving your chances of getting home again after each run—but it wasn't about the corpses. You were managing humans, carino , and I trust your gut . I'm relying on it."
Not for the first time, I realised how fortunate I’d been to stumble onto a man like Cruz. If he'd tried a cold approach rather than taking several days to ease me into the idea of meeting him, I wondered if he would have scared me off and left us both in very different places now. Would I still be following my strict routine and coming back to a sad, empty house without Haruto, utterly alone and wondering about the point of it all? The thought made me even more appreciative of what we were building and what we'd already achieved together.
"Wow, no pressure," I said. "I hope I don't let you down."
"I don't think that's possible."
Cruz sounded so sure of himself I almost believed him.
We’d been driving for half an hour when I noticed the sign for the upcoming turn-off to Beecham Falls. I remembered passing it once with a carload of friends many years ago, but I'd never had the chance to see it for myself. Living in the city surrounded by looming buildings and concrete, I craved nature and space, greenery, and life. Although this hadn't been part of our original plan, the urge to do something fun grew stronger as the turn approached.
I lifted my foot off the accelerator and appealed to Cruz. "What do you think? Should we make a short detour?"
He glanced at the sign, then back at me, no doubt already weighing up the risks versus the rewards. "We don't know what's down there or if the road's still driveable."
We'd more than likely find a breathtaking waterfall at the end of a smooth stretch of bitumen, but I understood where he was coming from. We could run into a horde—unlikely—or a group of people who were set up there and wouldn't take kindly to trespassers moving into their territory. Maybe we'd hit a pothole and irreparably damage the car—or maybe we'd make a fun memory to offset all the horror in our lives.
"If we meet new people today, this could be the last time that it's just you and me, and I want to do something that doesn't revolve around scavenging or fighting or trying to stay alive." I reached the turn and eased to a stop, lifting my brows to prompt his response.
Cruz took one look at me and huffed in amusement. "Remember in the city when I said you have me wrapped around your finger?"
I smiled. We both knew it only applied to situations when we weren't in immediate danger, but warmth rushed through me all the same. "Is that your way of saying yes?"
He held my gaze for a moment, turning the warmth up a notch, then his eyes crinkled at the edges. "Let's go check out the waterfall."