Chapter 53
CHAPTER
FIFTY-THREE
HARPER
I shouldn’t have put a Google alert on my phone because it’s constantly popping off, but I need to keep track of Julian while fixing this mess. I’m still blocked, so I’ve resorted to cyber stalking. It seems he was out with Madelyn Reynolds last night, and they were all over LA. He’s smiling, but not having fun. I’ve seen his genuine smiles, memorized them, cherished them, and these don’t qualify. Not even close.
He told me Madelyn Reynolds is a friend, and I will myself to believe that’s all they will be, even if she’s recently single. Some internet stories imply she broke off her engagement for Julian. Understandable because he’s so lovable, but they can’t be romantically involved. Because he loves me. Present tense.
It’s hard to watch him sliding back into his public life so effortlessly, after he shared how lonely it was before me. Unfortunately, he’s relapsed back to his old ways because it’s comfortable. But it’s empty and he’ll do anything to avoid pain. Clearly, because I’m watching the proof of his avoidance on TMZ.
“What the hell is all this?” Zac asks as he enters the living room from his morning skate. Arranged on the coffee table are two laptops, a whiteboard leaning against the window, and several notebooks scattered around. I’m in full-detective mode. I’m considering buying a corkboard and red yarn to tie it all together, to be honest.
“Just trying to solve a crime.” I pull the pencil out of my messy bun, and my hair falls in my face.
“Should I be looking for a chalk outline?” He looks over his shoulder, and I give him a maniacal laugh when Noodle barks at him.
“Not yet.”
He sits on the couch and leans down to rub my shoulders. I’m sitting on the floor in day-old yoga clothes, my glasses crooked on my nose, and my hair unbrushed. I must be a sight.
“Is Decker out with Madelyn Reynolds? Fuck, she’s hot.” He leans closer to get a better look at the gorgeous actress, her arm draped over his shoulder, dancing at some club. There’s space between them, so at least she’s not grinding up against him. I wouldn’t blame her if she was because he can use those hips. Those hips. I sigh. And thoughts like that get me off task. Need. To. Focus.
“Yep.” I shudder and lock my emotions away. They aren’t helping right now.
“I don’t know how you aren’t losing it right now. Tell me you aren’t going to snap or breakdown.” His concern is touching, endearing even. But I don’t have time to break down. Time is of the essence.
“Nope. I’m going to fix this.” I’m determined. I’m going to solve this, make him talk to me, and if he doesn’t want me after that, well, then I’ll fall apart. But not now.
Zac slides down from the couch and joins me on the floor. He puts his arm around me and squeezes. “And I thought Decker was the crazy one. You guys belong together.” I nod my head in agreement. We do. We absolutely do.
Another side hug, and he gets up and heads to his room. “Let me know how I can help. I’m going to go read for a bit.”
That’s not how Zac usually spends his down time, but maybe my chaos is infringing on his video-game space. “What are you reading?”
“Some sappy book by a guy I know. It’s insightful.” I can’t help but laugh.
My phone vibrates with an incoming call.
“Hey, how ya’ doing, Harps?” Lawson’s voice is caring but cautious. He’s worried about me.
“I’m okay.” And I am. For now. “Kind of focused on solving this mystery of who leaked Julian’s information, so this whole thing can be fixed.”
“He still blocking you?”
“Yeah, I don’t like it, but I understand. I’m a little disappointed he doesn’t trust me, but I get that, too.” And I do. I stayed in my head, waiting for the perfect time to confess my feelings. And that time didn’t come. If I’d been more open instead of trying to live out some fairytale, maybe we wouldn’t be in this mess.
And if I hadn’t been angry and left that damn voicemail, we wouldn’t be here either. It’s important I own my part in the story.
“Hey, you didn’t betray him and leak it, so don’t beat yourself up.”
“I’m not, really. But I’ve got to get him to talk to me. Has he talked to Chance?” I’m not proud, but I’ll use every resource and contact I have to gather intelligence about what I’m facing.
“Short texts, that’s all.”
“Does Chance think I’m the bad guy?” I wince at the thought. His friends are fiercely loyal, but I’d like to consider them my friends too. Losing them is a one-two punch.
There’s some mumbling in the background, and Lawson is back. “No. Listen, we’ll be playing in LA Friday, and he plans on knocking some sense into him.”
“Tell him I appreciate it. I need him to talk to me. Just talk. Once we do that, he can decide about me.” I’m convinced that once we talk and I solve the mystery of the leak, it will all be resolved.
"From where I'm sitting, the apology should come from him.” The slight edge in his voice lets me know I’m always his number one. I appreciate his support, but I don’t want him angry with Julian. At least not yet.
An email notification chimes, and I open it quickly. “YES!” I jump up and do a happy dance. Noodle barks at my sudden change in demeanor.
Zac runs into the room. “What? Everything alright? Is this where you lose it?” Panic fills his face, and I cackle. I’m sure I look unhinged.
Lawson is also panicking. “Harps? You okay? Harps?” His distant voice is coming through the phone.
I pick it up and talk to Lawson. “I’m fine, but I’ve gotta go. I’ve got to go!”
I reread the email from Professor Daniels, rush to get ready, and go for an in-person meeting at NYU. It seems he has the answer I’m looking for, and hopefully the solution to my problem.