34. Amelia
34
AMELIA
WALHALLA, 1903
ROSE QUARTZ: Opens the heart to unconditional love and peace.
I wipe my eyes and take the mug from Ivy’s shaking hands for I know, despite our charade of a temporary parting, I will never see her and Ned again. They have no reason to travel to Melbourne , nor can they afford to endure the mistrust of others by continuing our association. With my belongings hitched to a dray and sent on ahead, little Maude and I sit at Ivy’s table for the last time. Ned tries his best to brave a smile, but his fiddle and singing voice have long since left him. Instead , he stares at the bottom of his tankard, wishing things were different, regretting he wasn’t able to save his friend Thomas or help protect his family.
The deaths surrounding me have caused no end of rumour and gossip in the community. Suspicion and bad luck are not good allies. People are increasingly cautious and ever fearful of me. Slammed doors greet my knocks, and even the likes of Thomas’s band conductor has ceased enquiring after our health. And thus, I am excluded. Abandoned . Alone .
On the rare occasions I have ventured into town, women lower their eyes and scurry from the stores to avoid me. One day a pair of men walked along the dusty road by the river, hissing like stray cats behind my back. Another turned on me and called me a witch to my face. He went so far as to make the sign of the evil eye to prevent me from cursing him. From then on I made it a habit never to walk alone.
Yet it was the findings of the Coroner’s Court that hammered the last nail into my coffin. Only then did I lose my nerve, understanding Maude and I could no longer stay in Walhalla without work or a man’s protection.
The fire that took Alice’s life was deemed an accident. The officiating policeman refused to take into account the children’s versions of events. He indicated that the likes of miners’ children as witnesses were wholly unreliable. Ivy’s statement was also discounted, for she was inside the house, and did not see the beginnings of the fire first-hand.
As fate would have it, the coroner saw fit to hear Lionel’s testimony.
Lionel was painted the victim of several children who made a habit of provoking him—with Alice cast as ringleader. He spoke in a crisp, cold voice of how she had beaten and tormented him for years. ’ Tis hard to imagine an innocent child so full of hatred. If only the boy knew the truth.
Mariah’s son was coached to relate a story of legendary proportions; I prefer to believe it not his true nature, but the poison of his mother, who only wants ill of me. Such as it was, her influence within the constabulary had a most wretched impact on the proceedings.
Hearing the details of the horror was difficult enough. But when the inquest report was read to the court, I wept so hard I thought I might not survive. The report stated that Alice lit the fire and was solely culpable, caught in an incinerator of her own making. Inside the very building in the centre of town where my posters had been defamed with libellous hatred, my daughter was demonised in death as she was in life.
Mariah sat ramrod straight with lips pursed and a smug expression of victory on her face. Wearing a demure hat trimmed with a veil of black spotted lace, she was surrounded by her posse of sycophants, wringing their hands.
Mariah and Lionel have finally followed Jago abroad. She was farewelled in a grand spectacle, fussed and preened over by women from the church and the small-minded committees she presided over. A virtuous lady of all that is honest and upstanding.
Indeed , she appears to have it all.
‘’ Tis for the best, Ivy .’ I cover my friend’s hand and proffer a smile. ‘ There is little enough work for me here, and I cannot afford the land tax owing on my home. The bright lights of Melbourne , the city of opportunity in the new Federation of Australia , will see my way forwards. I hear the streets were once paved with gold, but surely ’tis not the truth of it.’
While I make light of my decision, my heart aches to leave her.
‘ What will you do there, Amelia ? ’ Tis some big city….’
Packed up in our belongings is the beautiful doll Thomas bought for Alice . I’ve saved it for Maude , along with Alice’s Sunday -best frock, and her teacup and saucer. I remembered Thomas’s mention of the ‘faerie dell’ near the Royal Arcade in Collins Street .
‘ A new place of employment is written in my cards. ’ Tis a fresh beginning, Ivy , and I am grateful for it. Interest in spiritualism is growing there. I plan to offer my skills in herbal remedies and cartomancy too. I will provide for us in the only way I am able and do what I must. ’ Tis who I am, after all.’
The spread I had laid gave me great hope. The Queen of Pentacles , Two of Cups and Wheel of Fortune . My fresh start is blessed indeed.
Ivy nods, for she is no stranger to mysticism and folklore and well knows my ways. Ned makes himself scarce.
‘ I hear the art of fortune telling is popular at fairs and markets. Shilling Fortunes , they call it.’ She leans in to top up my tea.
I know it too. A woman dresses in the garb of a gypsy, with a brightly coloured scarf around her head and bangles on her arms. She tells fortunes in a darkened room, consulting a crystal ball covered in silk and used for scrying. Although ’tis not my way, if I must….
‘ I am prepared to force myself into the theatre of disguise in order to feed my daughter. And so, a gypsy fortune-teller I shall become!’
‘ You be a brave one, Amelia Treloar . I’ll say that for you. But I agree, Walhalla is too small-minded for such practices. I wish you and dear Maudie well.’ Ivy’s voice breaks. I draw her into a hug.
There are of course fortune-telling charlatans—just as there are those who deceive and lie their way through life in trade or business or politics, for that matter. This is not my intention. I will endeavour to do my best to read truthfully although if the cards show misfortune, it may be prudent to hide the fact. In this, I will seek guidance. I am determined to make a living from my intuitive gifts and vow to become a better mother to Maudie than I was to her siblings.
The following morning, I close the door on my home for the last time and turn to farewell my dear friends. Ivy’s face is blotched crimson with tears. I hold mine back with difficulty; optimism is best for all our sakes.
‘ Watch out, maid!’ Ned waves his cap above my head and shoos away a pair of swooping magpies that squawk their displeasure. They return to their nest in the tall manna gum behind us, but not before I notice a tiding of five more in the branches.
An omen as clear as the ferocity of the birds’ warbled chorus. A secret never to be told…
In my lust and temptation to seek more than fate offered, I walked a dammed and ruinous path. The payment exacted was the unassuageable loss of those dear to me. All but Maudie .
In spite of this, I am destined for salvation in the next life.
And in time, our souls will reunite once more.