56. Sienna
CHAPTER 56
SIENNA
I sing my way back to Russell’s place. Taylor Swift keeps me company, and I belt out the lyrics to her most romantic songs, my body still buzzing after what went down in Zander’s car.
Mmmm-hmmm. I love that man so much I could burst.
Seriously, I feel like I’m flying, giddy laughter bubbling inside me as I pull up beside Russell’s house.
But the light emotion quickly dies when I pull his keys out of the ignition and realize that I’m about to piss him off… or hurt him… all over again.
Shit.
Closing my eyes, I rest my head on the steering wheel and take the chicken’s way out, praying that he’s not home and I can just call him later to tell him what I’ve done, and that Zoey and I will be moving back in with Zander.
I swallow. I wonder what the Football Frat guys will think of that .
Worrying my lip, I try not to let reality spoil what has been an epic afternoon.
Zander and I are back together, for good this time. No more secrets. No more ghosting. We’re making this work. I’m determined.
And that’s what gets me out of the car.
That’s what has me walking up the front steps.
Determination to be with the person I was born to be with.
I’ve only ever loved him, and now he’s mine forever.
A smile tugs at my lips, then grows to full beam when I walk into the house and quickly realize it’s empty.
“Thank you, God,” I murmur to the ceiling as I rush to Zoey’s room, gathering her stuff as quickly as I can.
Reaching under the changing table, I go to grab her diaper bag and am surprised to find it missing. I thought I’d dropped off the small bag at Mrs. Ward’s, but I must have given her the bigger one. My brain wasn’t functioning at full capacity this morning. The small one is probably in the stroller, which is in the back of Russell’s car still.
“Okay, fine. So, I’ll just…” Reaching under Zoey’s crib, I pull out her little pink suitcase and fill it with three days’ worth of clothes. I’ll need to come back again, but I don’t want to clear everything out of Russell’s place until Zander and I have come up with a more permanent solution. Living at the Football Frat won’t work. I’m not sure what we’re going to do, but Zoey’s crib and changing table can stay here until we definitely know.
Skipping down to my room, I pull out my suitcase and start filling it with the essentials when my phone starts ringing .
I glance at the screen, my stomach twisting uncomfortably, but I answer the video call anyway.
“Hey, Mom.”
“Hey, Blue!” Dad pops up behind my mother before she can even say hi.
I laugh. “Hey, Dad.”
“We just wanted to call and check in,” Mom explains. “We know you had a rough weekend. How are you doing today?”
“I’m great, actually.” I smile at the screen and just decide to say it. “Zander and I have worked it out. For good this time. We’re back together, and… I know you guys probably don’t love that idea, but he is Zoey’s father, and I love him. I really love him.”
They take a second to absorb that, blinking and opening their mouths like goldfish, until Mom manages to sputter, “B-but what about?—”
“He’s told me everything, and he wasn’t in the wrong the way I thought he was. He was being way too hard on himself. Anyway, I’ve forgiven him. He screwed up big-time that year, but I can’t hold that against him forever. He’s a good man… and I love him.”
“Yeah, so you’ve said.” Dad’s tone is dry, his concern obvious as he squishes next to Mom so I can see his face.
Mom worries her lip just the way I do, then lets out a sigh. “How’s Russell taking this?”
“Not well,” I admit. “I bumped into him on campus when I was looking for Zander, and he was… pissed .”
“Aw, sweetie.”
“Look, I’m sorry.” My expression buckles. “I know you wanted me to fall in love with him. You had this perfect plan for me, but… I’ve never felt that way about him, and he was trying so hard to force the issue.”
“What do you mean?” Dad frowns.
“He just…” I rub my forehead. “I didn’t mention it to you guys, but he’s been trying to get Zoey to call him Dada, and this morning when he left for work, he… he kissed me right on the mouth.” I frown. “It made me so uncomfortable.”
Dad’s frown is morphing from concern to anger. “He shouldn’t have done that.”
“I know, right?” I nod, relieved that my parents are agreeing with me on this.
Mom winces. “That must have been awkward.”
“Yeah, when it first happened, I didn’t even know what to say, but then when I found my head a little later, I told him that I wasn’t comfortable with it.” My lips turn into a soft pout. “I think I really hurt his feelings.”
“Well, he’s obviously not taking yours into consideration.” Mom shakes her head. “And I’m sad that he has feelings for you that you can’t reciprocate, but he still needs to respect you and your boundaries.”
I nod, but still feel kind of bad. Not guilty, just… sad that things aren’t easier.
“I don’t want to hurt him, but…” I shrug. “I’m in love with someone else.”
“Are you sure?” Dad asks. “You really want Zander?”
“Yes.” I say it so emphatically that I start to laugh… and then emotion gets the better of me, and I perch on the end of my bed and tell them everything. My feelings, my misunderstanding, his truth, our forgiveness. It all spills out in a torrent, and finally they understand it all.
“Wow.” Mom’s in shock .
Dad’s nodding and tipping his head. “Well, he sure screwed up pretty badly, but at the end of the day… he did the right thing.”
“He’s a good man, Dad. I never should have cut him out the way I did.”
His smile is glum. “Maybe we all made the wrong call there. But at the time, it felt right.”
“It did.” I nod. “But it was still wrong of us. We shouldn’t have kept him in the dark like that. He’s actually a really good father. You should see him with Zoey. It’s seriously adorable.”
Mom starts to smile. “Is she still calling him Foobawl?”
“Yeah.” I laugh, slashing the last of my tears away. “I’m not sure she’ll ever call him Daddy. Well, she did one time, but… I’m not sure when it will happen again.”
“It’ll happen,” Dad assures me, his eyes starting to glisten as he stares through the phone at me. “I know this has been a tough ride, but I’m proud of you, Blue. You’re a good mom. You’re a good daughter.”
“Aw, thanks, Dad.”
“You’ve always known your heart,” Mom continues. “From the youngest age, you’ve always been so determined to go after the things you want. And ever since you met Zander, you’ve wanted him. He lit you up like no one else could.”
My smile grows wide. “He still does.”
“I can see that.” Mom laughs, then leans her head against Dad’s cheek.
He shifts to kiss her forehead, and then they snuggle close again .
“I love you guys.” I blow a kiss to the camera. “I better go pick up Zoey.”
“Okay.” Mom nods. “Let us know how it goes with telling Russell.”
“Yeah.” I wince. “I’ll call you in a couple days.”
Dad gives me a thumbs-up. “Give my grandbaby a kiss from me.”
“Will do. I’ll make sure she’s around for the next call.”
“That’ll be lovely.” Mom blows a few kisses back to me, and then I hang up and quickly pack the rest of my stuff.
Russell could be home at any minute, although he’s most likely at hockey practice. Glancing at my watch, I hurry anyway, hauling my stuff out to the car and loading it up. I’ll have to return it tomorrow. I’ll talk to him then and hope he won’t be too angry with me. Maybe I should bring Wily and Tyrell along for protection detail. They seemed to work pretty well last time.
With a nervous laugh, I pull away from the curb and head to Mrs. Ward’s house. I still have the spare key to Football Frat, so I’m going to collect Zoey, take her back there for dinner and a bath, and make sure we’re all unpacked before the guys get home.
Checking the time, I wince. Man, I am so late to pick up my baby girl. The call with my parents took over an hour, but it was an important one. Knowing I have their support means so much to me.
I should call Mrs. Ward and let her know I’m coming, but I’m almost there, so I drive just a touch faster and pull into her driveway at a quick clip. Jumping out, I run to the front door and do a friendly knock, bouncing on my toes while I wait .
An excited buzz is vibrating through me, and I’m grinning like a circus performer when Mrs. Ward finally opens the door.
“Hey.” I greet her cheerfully. “I’m so sorry I’m late. The day got away from me, but… is Zoey… here?” My chatter trails off as I take in Mrs. Ward’s confused expression.
“Well, no, dear.”
A sharp jolt shoots through my chest. “I’m sorry?”
“Russell came to pick her up. He said you’d called to let him know you were running late.”
What!
My insides flail, my hand trembling as I place it against my surging stomach. “When did he come?”
“About an hour ago. I thought you knew.” Mrs. Ward steps toward me, worry creasing her expression, borderline panic filling her eyes.
Oh shit. I don’t want to make her feel bad. Or worry her.
Putting on a bright smile I’m far from feeling, I nod. “You know what? Of course. I remember now.” Tapping my forehead, I put on the show of a lifetime. “My brain is so muddled today. This is what running late does to me.” My laughter is high and pitchy as I back away from her front door and start heading for the car. Raising my hand, I call over my shoulder, “Thanks again for looking after my girl.”
“Anytime, sweetheart. You take care now.”
I don’t think she’s convinced by my performance, as she stays in the doorway, looking at me with a worried frown as I pull back onto the road and squeal off.
Punching my phone screen, I call Russell .
“Hello, Sienna.” His voice is sounding eerily strange. It sets my teeth on edge.
Panic starts to get the better of me and I end up shouting, “Where’s my daughter?”
“She’s safe.”
“What the hell does that mean?” I slam on the brakes, my chest heaving at the intersection while I stare at my phone screen. “Where is Zoey!”
“She’s safe with me. If you want to see her, all you have to do is agree to never see Zander again. You come and stay with me, and we can be a family. Just the way it should be.”
My blood runs cold.
Is he serious?
This can’t be happening right now.
I feel like I’ve just been transported into some sick psychological thriller.
A horn blasts behind me and I jolt, moving through the intersection blindly before pulling to the side of the road and gripping the wheel.
“Russell, you tell me where you are right now.”
“You leave Zander right now.”
“I’m not going to do that! Now stop acting like a crazy psycho or I’m calling the police.”
He lets out a soft laugh. “If I hear one siren, I will disappear with her for good, and you’ll never see her again.”
What the fuck?
My eyes bulge, my heart catapulting into my throat.
“Have you completely lost your mind!” I shout. “You give me back my daughter!”
“I’ve told you how to get access to our girl. It’s up to you now, Sienna. Say yes and I’ll tell you exactly where we are.”
“What?” I breathe out the word, shock stealing all my volume.
“I’ll give you a minute to decide.” He hangs up, and I gape at my phone, his words swirling around me before I let out a rage-filled, panic-induced scream.