The Fox and the Falcon (No Other Gods #2)

Chapter Thirty-Five

“Why did you show me this?” The question sounded every bit as hollow as I felt. We remained amidst the trees.

“I just told you—”

“No,” I stopped him. There was a clarity to my thoughts and feelings that cut through everything that had overwhelmed me moments before. “Why did you show me? It wasn’t Fauna, it wasn’t Caliban, it wasn’t Azrames. Everyone knows. Heaven knows. And you were the one who told me. Why ?”

Silas tilted his head back and looked through the ember-colored canopy at the spots of blue. Bars of light filtered through the leaves, kissing him with their golden warmth. He pulled in another in a long line of slow, deep breaths. “Angels and valkyrie have a lot in common,” he said. “We know we were made to blindly serve our creator. We answer every call to battle and we facilitate wills that are not our own, because our will is the will of another. If an angel starts to think differently, they’re cast out—fallen. A defector. Estrid lives among the Vanir as a defector from the Aesir. But at least we understand the roles we play, and we knew the consequences of abandoning the paths set out for us. Humans are meant to have free will.”

“It’s sort of our thing,” I said bitterly.

“Famously so,” he agreed with dry humorlessness. He met my eyes and held them. “And the gods have their fun. They push, they manipulate, they draw their power from their worshippers, they bless, they curse, but they stay in their lane.”

“And what lane is that?”

“The gods keep to their people.”

My eyes twitched as they narrowed into slits. “Everyone plays with their own toys?”

“More or less,” he said. “Except all gods have their toys, and one—a popular kid, a bully, one with more power than he knows what to do with—is playing with a bomb. And everyone on the playground pokes and prods to see if they can get the bomb to blow up in that god’s face. Because if it does…”

“Then king of the playground is up for grabs,” I finished for him.

He extended his hand once more. “I was commanded to offer to bind myself to you. It would have done little more than press pause once more. You and your role as the bomb would be off the table for yet another cycle. I’d have kept you safe, of course, not because I cared about you, but because the longer you stayed on this earth under Heaven’s care, the more time we’d buy to delay the explosion.”

“And if Heaven can’t keep me from giving birth to hellspawn?”

“Then we kill you.”

“Thanks.” My stomach roiled. Acid burned my throat.

“Heaven can’t let Hell have their champion. They fuck with your fate, just like every pantheon who can get their hands on you fucks with your free will.”

“And Caliban just lets it happen.” I wanted to lie down on the forest floor. I wanted to be left in this memory to die.

“Yes and no. He went on the sort of killing spree that ancients wrote ballads about. His hands are stained with the blood of gods and fae and men across the realms and throughout time. Accords were struck. Promises were made. The pantheons went on urging you to become a whore so that the two of you could usher in the end of the world. Some got away with it, if they were subtle. Others played with your fate knowing their lives were forfeit.”

It was the least of my problems, but the word stung. I couldn’t help the quiet ache as I whispered, “Don’t call me a whore.”

His eyes looked as wounded as I felt. “I didn’t want to play any role in this war. I don’t want to manipulate you. But when the order came down, I wasn’t given a lot of options. You and I both know what happens in my kingdom to angels who express free will. And when Fauna arrived, it became perfectly clear how much higher the stakes were in this cycle. This was what she was born into the world to do.”

“She saw her shot at fulfilling her destiny. I’m so fucking fragile and broken that all she had to do was trick me into thinking she cared about me.”

“I went on a date with her once, you know.”

My laugh was bitter. “I know. Let me guess: you were trying to persuade her not to end the world.”

“My job has always been to keep the ship on course. I knew things were bad when Fauna arrived, but suddenly it wasn’t just the three of us. You were fucking with the Phoenicians. You were plotting with the Greeks. You’re barreling toward a prophecy without even realizing the role you play in this war. And that’s not fair to you, to anyone.”

The now-dry remnants of salty tears itched. I wiped at where the evidence of emotion stained my face, using the motion as an excuse to look away. My hand stayed on my face as I frowned into my palm. “But you don’t care about me.”

“I didn’t care about you.”

I looked up at him once more. The sun hit the gold of his eyes in a way that set them on fire. They were the brightest things in the woods. Silas extended his hand once more.

“And?” I asked. “We leave here, and then what? What do I do with this information?”

“Now that you know? You do whatever the hell you want.”

“And Betty?”

He swallowed. His fingers flexed slightly as if to withdraw his offer to take me away from the memories, but he forced his hands open once more. “Heaven is not your ally, even if I am. Our orders are to end you and your Prince. This is the time to take our shot. They’re going to be coming for anyone you care about, starting with taking out the most powerful witch on your side who may have posed a problem. No better time to strike than while her demon was unavailable to help.”

I sucked in a breath so fast I went lightheaded.

He didn’t wait for my consent this time as he grabbed my hand. “Let’s go.”