The Friend Game (Games for Two #1)

Chapter 29

WHAT I DIDN'T anticipate was the way half of the congregation would descend upon Luke as soon as the service ended. But descend they did. Meanwhile I spotted Belinda and Etta both making their way toward me and, in a fit of panic, retreated as quickly as possible to the nearest hallway, making my way all the way to the back of the church then doubling around to get to my car without talking to anyone.

Now I’m locked up inside Max and Jill’s guesthouse, eyes glued to the door, waiting for Jill to come barging in using the spare key she keeps in her kitchen, demanding answers. So far, though, everything has been quiet. Scarily quiet. Like the way quiet settles over the earth right before a storm hits.

I should’ve stayed at the church. I sat in my car for a while, but the deafening silence was too much, so I drove home. I wanted to be there for Luke, but feared my presence would only make things worse for him .

I hop up off my couch realizing with a bolt of clarity that there is a way I can support him without actually being there: I can pray.

***

Loud knocking wakes me up from the restless sleep I fell into after my praying session eventually landed me back on the couch. Groggily I rub my eyes, completely disoriented. What time is it? How long was I asleep for?

The knocking takes up again, this time accompanied by someone calling my name, “Hannah!”

Luke! I sit up with a bolt, getting up off the couch so fast all of the blood rushes to my head, and I have to bend over so I don’t pass out.

The knocking stops, surging me back into desperate motion. He must think I’m not here! Still a little lightheaded, I’m forced to lean on the door as I open it, stars continuing to spot my vision. But then Luke is there in front of me— and everything clears until all I see is him.

“Luke,” I breathe and then he’s stepping toward me, sweeping me into his arms, and kissing me—this time with zero hesitation. With complete abandon.

His hands wrap more tightly around me as the kiss deepens, and I let my own hands trace across the muscles of his upper back, before sliding them into place securely around his neck. A gasp slips out of me as he lifts me up with a deep groan, letting my feet dangle off the ground. He holds me there for a second, then, with a second groan, pulls away, lowering me back to the ground and taking a step back.

“You have no idea,” he says, his breathing heavy, “what you do to me, Hannah Garza.”

Heat swirls in my abdomen. I want to go back to kissing him, but I force myself to stay put. Since Luke is a pastor, I know it’s especially important to let him lead when it comes to this new physical component of our relationship. So instead of stepping back into his arms, I let out a happy sigh and say, “I’m so glad you’re here. I was worried about you, and I wasn’t sure what I could do to help besides pray.”

“You prayed for me?” Luke’s mouth lifts in the softest of smiles.

“Of course,” I say earnestly. “I saw the way everyone rushed forward to talk to you and knew you’d need some Holy Spirit help.” I reach over and squeeze his forearm. He looks overcome by emotion, but his answering smile tells me it’s the good kind of overcome. “Now please, I’m dying to know what happened with the elder board.”

“Well, they’re sort of split right now. Quite a few of them seemed ready to annul the contract and let bygones be bygones, but a couple of the more outspoken of the bunch weren’t quite ready to do so. They thought I should be put on probation.”

“Probation?” I exclaim. “What would that even mean?”

“Basically that they’d be watching for me to put one more toe out of line.” Luke shakes his head with a chuckle. “I told them to go ahead and put me on probation. In my view we should always be holding each other accountable for our sins, so if they want to analyze my life and lovingly call me out for any missteps, I welcome that and hope that I have the grace and humility to hear it.”

“Wow,” I breathe, admiration pulsing through me. The idea of standing in front of a group of people, however well intentioned, and having them challenge me on any sin patterns in my life sounds, well, awful.

“So now I’m on probation until March 1,” he concludes. “But free to date you in the meantime,” he adds with a rakish grin. “So can I take you out to dinner?”

“Right now?” I squeak, my hand flying to my surely mussed hair and my gaze scanning over my rumpled clothes. Luke’s gaze follows mine and he draws in a long, appreciative breath that makes my whole body tingle with pleasure .

“As much as I’d enjoy staying here,” he says, voice tinged with regret, “it wouldn't be the wisest of choices given the depth of my attraction to you.”

Remember that time I wondered if dating a pastor would be as chaste as the dating in a Jane Austen book? It appears that it might be. But since Luke is also saying very swoony things that only Jane Austen heroes would say, I’m okay with that. I mean, given the depth of my attraction to you?

That’s a straight up Austenian hero type of declaration.

Outside of that time in second grade when I got a fluffy diary as a birthday present, I’ve never journaled before, but you can bet when I get home from dinner I am going to grab the first notebook I find and write that down.

Dear Diary,

Today a boy told me he couldn’t be alone in my house with me given the depth of his attraction to me. Ahhhhh!!! I’m not screaming–you’re screaming!

xoxo,

Hannah

P.S. I love him.

“Hannah? You still with me?” Luke asks, waving a hand in my face. I hop back to the present moment.

“Sorry. I may have been daydreaming for a second. ”

Luke chuckles. “You know your imagination is one of the things I love most about you. Among many other things, of course.” My brain immediately tunnels in on the word love, but I give it a forceful reminder that he didn’t say he loved me , but that he loved something about me. A very key difference.

“Oh really?” I adopt my best coy expression (and I’ve practiced in the mirror many a time—so I think it’s pretty good). “Care to tell me more about these other things?”

His eyes turn molten. “Let me take you out to dinner, and I’ll be glad to.”

“Yeah, okay.” I nod breathlessly, and follow him out the door, completely forgetting about my slightly disheveled state under the heat of his approving gaze.

“How does Thai food sound?” he asks as we walk. “I know this great place nearby–” he stops himself then turns to look at me. “Wait, do we need to go somewhere further away so we’re not seen together?”

Some of the air starts to leak out of the balloon of happiness I’ve been floating around in. His words remind me forcefully of those early months of dating Marshall. How he never wanted to be seen with me. Today at church Luke didn’t want to give my identity away. I assumed that was for my sake, but maybe it was actually for his own. After all, I’m in danger of being fired for lying. Not exactly a person he’d want to be associated with. Especially since he’s on probation.

It’s completely understandable on his part. Honestly, I should’ve thought of this myself.

So why am I so disappointed by it?

Luke must notice the way my face falls at his words because he takes my hand.

“Hannah,” he says, “I’m only asking out of concern for you. You’ve got that board meeting coming up and I don’t want to add any fuel to the gossip fire already burning at Grace Canyon. Not everyone is happy with my decision to break the contract I signed, and I don’t want you being the woman I broke my contract for to negatively affect the way the board votes.”

“Oh. Oh. ” My hand goes to my heart. “I thought, well…I mean, I would even understand if you wanted to wait to go public until after the board meeting is over and people are less focused on the fact that I lied about my certification. You don’t need me bringing down your approval ratings,” I say with an uneasy laugh.

“Hannah,” Luke shakes his head at me, “as the apostle Paul so aptly put it, ‘if I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.’ I came out with our relationship because I wanted to please God, not man. So when it comes to telling people about us, the decision is fully yours, okay?” He looks earnestly into my eyes and my stomach does a little flip-flop.

“Okay,” I agree. “In that case, I think we should not tell people that I’m the woman you’re seeing until after my meeting.”

“You do?”

“I do.” I nod. “I admire you for not being worried about people’s approval of you, but I would never forgive myself if my bad choices got you fired. You keep taking care of my needs, let me take care of yours for once.”

Luke studies my face, then nods. “Okay,” he relents. He lifts a hand and pushes my hair lightly off my face, cupping my cheek as gently as if I were made of glass. “Though I have another need that I think you could help with me.”

“Oh really?” My words come out breathy. “Which need is that?”

“The need to kiss you,” he says simply, then he tugs me the rest of the way to him and does just that.