47. Nell
47
NELL
On Monday morning, I walk straight into the writers’ nook and then straight back out again.
Charlie’s back.
He’s sitting at his desk – the desk I was sitting at all Thursday and Friday while he was off sick. The desk I sort of assumed I’d be sitting at this week too.
But no – here he is, back in, bright and early. Luckily, he’s got his back to me as I step into the nook. I duck out quickly and head to my old desk in the IT department, feeling the anxiety begin to whirr in my chest. I’m going to have to speak to him at some point today. Even though he’s been pretty much all I’ve thought about the whole weekend, I have no idea what I’ll say to him.
‘So – come crawling back, have we?’ Jarrod says with a grin.
‘It was only a meaningless fling with that other desk, Jarrod,’ I tell him as I sit down next to him. ‘I would never leave you. We’ve been through too much.’
He closes his eyes and nods solemnly, which really makes me laugh. ‘So, is this your last week then?’ he asks.
‘Yeah, it’s supposed to be.’ The thought makes the anxiety whirr even harder. Friday is meant to be my last day at Punching Up and still no one apart from Talia has even mentioned the writers’ assistant role. All last week it felt like the job had to be mine. I’m getting on so well with all the staff, throwing in ideas at the meetings – and my Kay DeBlue interview got some of the biggest laughs during the live recording. I posted a few more snippets on the Punching Up socials on Friday, and they blew up over the weekend too. Even though you can only hear my voice on the interview – I was thankfully out of shot – I still picked up about a thousand new followers. And Punching Up’s TikTok picked up about ten thousand. And it’s all down to me.
Still, I can’t be sure. As Mica kept kindly reminding me over the weekend, Charlie is still the boss’s son. Even though he screwed up that interview, even though he’s called in sick the last two days, even though he hasn’t had one of his sketches featured on the show, even though I know he doesn’t want anything to do with his father . . . he’s still the boss’s son, and in the end, that might turn out to be the trump card.
Last night, tossing and turning to try to get to sleep, the grim thought even presented itself that this whole thing had been planned from the start. That Bishi and Nate had been going through the motions for my internship, fully intending to offer Charlie the job at the end of it.
If that happens then . . . Well, then I’m screwed. Chlo and Mica have done me mates’ rates for the flat for this month, but there’s no way I can afford to keep paying London mates’ rates on zero income. In a week’s time, I could be back in Tealby, back to pub work and supermarket shifts, back to spending all my downtime sending out applications and searching for writing jobs. It’ll be like this month never even happened. It’s almost too awful to think about.
‘Nell?’
I glance up to see Charlie standing in front of me. My stomach clenches.
‘Hi,’ I say.
‘Hey. Erm . . .’ He glances at Jarrod, who has just removed his headphones. ‘I just wondered if I could have a word with you. If that’s OK?’
Jarrod raises his eyebrows at me. I give him a brief nod to let him know it’s OK and he stands up. ‘I’m just off to the vending machines. Nell, I’ll pick you up some Starmix.’
‘You’re a legend, thanks, Jarrod.’
‘Seems like a nice bloke,’ Charlie says, as he walks off.
‘He is.’ There’s a moment’s silence. My heartbeat sounds deafening. I hope Charlie can’t hear it. ‘Are you feeling better?’ I ask him.
A look of confusion flashes across his face. And then he nods. ‘I wasn’t ill. I just chickened out of coming in. Because I messed up that interview. Because I messed up with you.’
My face flushes. He shifts on the spot in front of me. ‘Nell, I owe you a massive apology. I am so sorry you saw those photos. But I’m much, much sorrier that I lied to you.’
His face is hard and his eyes are shining. He really looks like he means it. He sweeps a lock of his sandy hair out of his eyes and my heartbeat gets even louder. ‘I just panicked when you asked if anything had happened between Daphne and me,’ he says. ‘It was totally fucking stupid, and I’m really, really sorry. But that one kiss in the photo booth is all that happened, Nell. I swear it. I wasn’t expecting her to kiss me; I didn’t even particularly want her to, but she did. And I didn’t stop it. But I promise you there’s nothing going on between us. There never was.’
My face is still burning. I glance down at my keyboard and nod. ‘Whatever you say, Francombe.’
‘No, don’t do that, Nell, please,’ he says, his voice rising a notch and making me look up. ‘The only reason I lied is because . . .’ He stares at the ground, then clears his throat and looks straight back at me. ‘I really, really like you, Nell. A lot. I have done ever since I gave you back your phone that day outside Pret. And with every day that’s gone by over the past few weeks, I’ve just liked you more and more. That’s why I lied. And I’m so sorry – I’m a total fucking idiot.’
‘There you both are!’
My head’s still whirling from Charlie’s words when I see Bishi standing behind him. ‘We need you in the writers’ meeting now,’ she says. ‘Big news: Kay DeBlue’s hosting this week! And, Nell, she’s specifically asked for you!’