The Haunting Crush (Mesa Boys #4)

Chapter 4

CHAPTER FOUR

K ai, dressed in his black restaurant t-shirt and jeans, wiped a wine glass down with a towel and watched the diners from the dinner rush leave the restaurant, group by group. He surveyed the bar, stepping across its width. Did anyone need a refill or a check?

“Almost done.” Beth walked to him and stopped, placing her hands on her hips, releasing a soft sigh. She brushed a lock of blonde bang off her brow and looked at him, her blue eyes curious. “Got any plans for your days off?”

He smiled at her. “Just the usual. Probably a trail run tomorrow, then I’m going to try and get Bryce back on the mountain bikes on Monday.” Maybe this time Bryce wouldn’t complain as much.

She chuckled, crossing her arms over her thin waist. “Good luck with that.”

Bryce sauntered by the front of the bar with empty plates in his hand.

“Bryce.” Kai lifted his chin to him.

He stopped and focused on Kai. “What do you want now?”

“Mountain biking Monday?” He smirked .

“Only if you promise to take it easy on me.” Bryce strode off toward a swinging door leading into the kitchen.

“So, you do that a lot?”

Kai searched for the source of the voice. “Conner?” His heart skipped.

He sat on a bar stool to the right of Kai, wearing a blue button-down shirt, resting his forearms on the bar. “Can you make me a mojito?” He offered him a crooked smile. “And throw the bottles.”

“Sure, I can do that for you.” Conner looked good tonight. When would his date arrive? Kai pursed his lips and glanced at the floor, shaking his head once, then set the wine glass on the glass cooler.

Beth slapped his arm. “Evidently, you’ve got a new admirer.” She went behind the island.

I wish. Kai let a shy smile spread over his mouth, set up the high-ball glass and shaker, then perused the bottles and twirled them in the air, one by one, pouring and mixing the drink, slapping the mint, stealing peeks at Conner.

Conner gave Kai a wide grin, wrinkling the corners of his eyes, then propped an elbow on the bar and rested his cheek on his hand. “You’re so good at that.”

Kai’s heart warmed. At least there was something Conner liked about him. He twirled the napkin at Conner, watching it land in front of him, then placed the drink on top of it. “Thanks.” He searched the clientele at the bar. Did anyone need anything, or could he chat with Conner while he was still alone?

Beth grinned at him, then took a few empties and debit cards from customers.

She had it covered. His attention returned to Conner. “Good?”

“Yeah, very good.” He released the straw from his mouth, then raked his teeth over his bottom lip. “So, did you get your blazer fixed? ”

How did Conner know he had a blazer? He knit his brows and narrowed his eyes. “Yeah. How did you know about that?”

“Bryce. I came in for lunch yesterday.” Conner sipped his drink from the straw.

“Oh.” Figured. Bryce and his big mouth. He grabbed a bottle from the speed well and the towel, then wiped it off.

“You ever see that Brandon guy again?” Conner pressed his lips together.

“No, he hasn’t bothered me since you threw him on the ground.” Maybe he was rid of him for good. He snickered.

Conner furrowed his brows and leaned against the bar top. “How does it work, you know, when you’re gay?”

He dropped the bottle in the speed well and placed his hands on the bar. “What do you mean by that?” Was this a sexual question? Surely he understood the dynamics of anal sex.

Conner stared at his mojito, stirring it with the straw. “Well, how do you know when a guy is interested? How do you know when he’s gay?”

“Oh...” He freed a quick chuckle. But still, why was Conner asking him something like this? “Well, uh, it’s pretty obvious when a guy hits on you. I suppose it’s not all that different from when you hit on a girl or when a girl hits on you.”

Conner looked up at him, squinting his eyes. “Do you always wait for the guy to hit on you? Or do you ever hit on anyone?”

He widened his eyes. Okay, this was interesting. How to handle it? He’d never even thought about it. He stepped back and rubbed his fingers on his chin. “I guess I just wait to be hit on.” He snickered. It was a hell of a lot easier that way. Maybe he wasn’t one to take chances with his heart.

Conner looked him over, licking his lips. Under his breath, he said, “Good to know.” He shifted back in his seat, then sucked down the rest of the drink, lowering his brows. “Can you make me another one?”

“Sure.” Conner wasn’t making a whole lot of sense tonight. Kai set everything up and worked the bottles, making Conner’s mojito, then placed it on the bar top. “There you go.”

Conner sipped it. “I fucked up.”

“What?” Conner wasn’t talking about the graduation party thing, was he? He lifted his brows, holding his breath.

Conner fixated on him, his eyes dazed. “I fucked up.” He grit his teeth. “My whole fucking life, I’ve only done what everybody else wanted. I never did what I wanted. I listened to assholes and signed up for shit I knew I couldn’t follow through on. I never let myself be me .”

Kai bent forward, placing his hands midway on the bar top, studying Conner. Maybe he shouldn’t have another drink. “Were you out drinking before you came here?”

“Yeah.” Conner huffed and frowned. “Nobody ever expected anything out of you, did they?”

He wasn’t sure that was a nice thing to say, but he’d go with it for now. “No, I guess not.”

“I mean, you never had a dad riding your ass to be a doctor, or a mother wanting you to be fucking perfect. Perfect grades, perfect athlete, perfect girlfriend...”

Kai twitched the corners of his mouth. How should he respond? This wasn’t funny. In fact, it was downright sad. He had no idea Conner felt like that. “No. The only thing I was expected to be was pathetic, just like my dead father.” Why did he have to blurt that out? Shit. He flinched and straightened, glaring at the floor.

Conner widened his eyes and looked at him. “Who told you that?”

He scowled. “My mother.” He let loose a long exhale and scanned the bar for empties. This conversation wasn’t going right. Maybe he could look busy somewhere else.

“Kai.”

His breath stuck. His heart pinched. Did Conner have to say his name like that? “What?” He examined Conner .

“You’re not pathetic. I don’t think you’re pathetic.” He wrinkled his forehead, sipping his drink, swaying in his seat.

Kai chuckled and shook his head. This was really weird. “Well, then that’s one person.” He wiped the sink.

Beth approached him. She glanced at Conner, then focused on Kai. Slowly, she said, “Everything all right here?”

He smiled at Conner. “Yeah, everything’s fine.” As good as having a secret crush drunk at the bar could be. At least Brandon wasn’t here this time. Or Liz.

Conner gave him a faint grin. With a slight slur, he said, “Kai’s the best.”

She leaned to Kai and in his ear, whispered, “So, we’ve got an I love you, man drunk going on?” She chuckled.

He nodded. Under his breath, he said. “I’ll get him a water.”

She shook her head once and stepped to the other guests, picking up their empties and getting their checks.

At least she knew to pick up the slack for him so he could handle Conner. He grabbed a red plastic cup, scooped ice into it, then poured water in from the soda gun.

“Kai.”

His heart skipped. Damn. “Yes, Conner.” He set the water in front of him and forced a wide grin.

Conner drank the remainder of his mojito and slapped it on the gray bar top. “Can you make me another one?” A sloppy smile spread over his lips.

“How about you drink that water first?” Kai glanced at the POS system, 10:45 p.m. Almost closing time. “We’re about to close anyway.”

“Kai, talk to me.” He flung his arm out across the bar and laid his cheek on it.

Bryce stepped to Kai from behind and tilted his head at Conner. “What the fuck?”

He could see in Bryce’s eyes he was gearing up to have a good time with this. Conner didn’t need any shit right now from him. “Ssh.” He glared at Bryce. “Just leave him alone. ”

He lifted his brows and jutted his chin. “Fine.” He stomped off.

Kai placed his hands on the bar top in front of Conner. He knew how to play this game. “I’ll talk to you, but only if you drink that water.” He smirked.

Conner lifted his head and sipped the water, then rested his cheek on his arm. “Why are my friends such assholes?”

He choked out a laugh. This might get very interesting. “You think that, too, huh? Question is, why do you hang out with assholes?”

Conner furrowed his brows. “I don’t mean to. They’re not always assholes.” He raised his head and rubbed the bar with his fingers. “They just, I don’t know. We grew up together. We went through the same things.” He squinted at Kai. “You’re my friend though, right?”

Oh, boy . “Sure.” What the hell was going on with Conner? This wasn’t like him at all. “Conner.”

He straightened in his seat. “Yeah?”

Kai cocked his head. Maybe he could get to the bottom of it. “What’s up? Did something happen tonight?”

He scrunched his face and shook his head. “No.” He sighed. “I’m just done with all of it.” He came forward, setting an elbow on the bar top, pointing at Kai. “Do you know I used to go to all the best clubs in downtown Scottsdale? I’d get in for free. I’d get bottle service. They fucking treated me like I was a VIP. I was a VIP.” He pouted. “But that’s all done. I don’t have to do it anymore. It was all Paige wanted. All she cared about was money and how everything looked to everybody else. Then, then she caught...” He slapped his hand to his mouth and rounded his eyes.

“Are you okay? You going to puke?” Kai raced to the end of the bar and sped around the front, then wound his arm around Conner’s shoulders. Last thing he needed was to clean up puke. “Let’s go into the bathroom. ”

“No, no, I’m okay.” He laid his head on Kai’s shoulder. “I’m not going to puke. I almost said something I shouldn’t.”

What the hell had he been about to say? Something about being caught. Caught doing what? Shit, Conner’s head is on my shoulder. His heart hammered in his chest. He propped him up in the bar stool and released him.

Janice walked out from the swinging kitchen doors, opened her mouth, and jogged to Kai. “Hey, Beth can handle closing. Why don’t you take him home?”

“What?” What was wrong with her? He knit his brows together.

“Bryce said he lives across the street and he’s a friend of yours. Just get him out of here and make sure he gets home okay. Get me his card, so he can pay his bill, then I’ll clock you out.”

“Conner, give me your debit card,” Kai said.

Conner slid out his leather wallet from the back pocket of his jeans, pulled out the debit card, then handed it to Kai.

“Here.” He gave it to Janice.

She jogged behind the bar, ran the card, then handed the bill and a pen over the bar top. “Get him to sign this.”

Conner sniggered. “I’m giving you a twenty-dollar tip again. Because you’re my friend.” He signed the paper and dropped the pen on the bar top.

“That’s very generous of you.” Janice chuckled and waved her hand at Kai. “Go.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake.” Thank you, Bryce. Janice was really making him take Conner home. He drew a deep breath and looked him over. “Come on, we’re leaving.”

Conner let a coy grin quirk his lips. “I thought you didn’t hit on guys?”

“I’m not hitting on you. I’m doing you a favor.” Only because hitting on him would be a complete waste of time. He let the ghost of a smile play on his lips.

“Why aren’t you hitting on me? Am I not your type?” Conner spat out a snicker .

You’re very much my type . “Stop it.” He wrapped an arm around Conner, under the armpits. He was going to kill Bryce when they went mountain biking. “Stand up and let’s go.”

Conner slid off the barstool and draped an arm around Kai’s shoulders. He sniffed his head. “You smell nice.”

“Really.” Kai twisted his head and bit his lip, holding in a laugh. This whole thing was ridiculous. “Come on.” He walked Conner to the door of the restaurant. “How much did you have to drink before you came here?”

“I don’t know. I quit counting after the fifth beer.” He stumbled.

Kai grabbed him up and adjusted his hold. Damn, he was still a muscular guy and had to be four inches taller. “Okay, work with me here.” Conner had seemed fine when he got there. Guess everything just hit him . He’d seen it happen before, someone looked normal one minute, then shitfaced the next. He walked him out the glass doors of the restaurant and down a concrete sidewalk, passing by shops in a mish mash of sizes and styles, some stucco, some brick, one story and two, and bushy palo verde trees sticking out of the pavement every twenty feet. “Which apartment is yours?” He took deep breaths, working to keep him steady.

“I got the best one.” Conner pointed to the three-story apartment complex across from them, beyond a median with grass, pathways, fountains, sculptures, and tall trees. “It’s on the third floor, corner. Looks out over the fountain.”

Kai nodded. Figures. Probably the most expensive one, too. He scanned the apartments, the tall glass windows lining the bottom floor with shops, the modern tri-colored architecture in lime-green, dark-gray, and cream sections. This place wasn’t like anything else in town. It looked like it belonged in Scottsdale, where Conner belonged apparently.

Kai walked him to the corner, then out over a crosswalk, past the grassy median and to the sidewalk next to the apartments. He’d seen these places a million times but had never been inside. “ How do we get up there?” He looked up and down the avenue, at the shops and palm trees standing tall every thirty feet.

“You go in there.” Conner nodded at an open hallway between shops with a red handicapped railing and a ramp.

Kai walked him into the hallway and started up cement stairs with a red railing.

“I can’t believe you’re coming home with me.” Conner stumbled on a step, then righted himself.

“Me, neither.” All he had to do was get Conner into his apartment, then he could go home, and this weird mess would be over. Panting, he peered up at the flights of stairs. Only two more to go. He reached the top of the stairs and looked out over a white landing with dark, gray, metal doors. “Which one?”

“Here.” Conner tightened his hold on him and led him to a door on the right. He pulled out a keychain from a front pocket, then unlocked and opened the door.

“Okay, so you’ve got it from here, right?” Kai unwound his arm from Conner’s back and massaged a tense muscle in his own neck.

“Come in with me.” Conner grabbed his hand and tugged him through the doorway.

Kai sighed and floundered into the main room of the apartment, taking in the sleek wooden cabinets with long brushed nickel handles in the attached kitchen. God, can I please go home now? He flicked on the lights from a switch at the wall and looked Conner up and down. “What do you want?”

Conner swayed on his feet, then plopped his hand on Kai’s shoulder, peering at him with one eye shut. “The least you could do is help me get to my bed.” He worked a lopsided grin over his face. “I mean, I did give you a nice tip and I did drive you home the other night.”

He scowled. “Yeah.” Damn, he had him on that. “Okay, where is it?” He wrapped his arm around Conner’s back.

He flung his arm over Kai’s shoulders. “In here.”

He let Conner walk him over wood-plank flooring, past a tan, suede couch with a cream, oval, coffee table, sitting on top of a cream and gray shag rug, and into a bedroom with a gray and white striped duvet.

Conner tripped. “Shit.” He toppled backward over the bed.

Kai fell onto him, his chest flush against Conner’s, his cheek on his shoulder. “What the fuck, man?” He lifted up on his elbows and gazed down at Conner’s stunning face, the ice-blue eyes staring back at him. This was just like the night of the graduation party, except Conner was on the bottom. He widened his eyes and swallowed hard.

“Uh, Kai.”

“What?”

“Stay with me.” Conner hooked his arms around Kai’s waist. “I don’t want to be alone tonight.” He shut his eyes.

Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. Heat rippled through his groin. His cock hardened. A wave of lust washed over him. “N-not sure this is a good idea.” He shifted his hips off Conner. Did Conner feel his hard-on? Kai’s mouth went dry, and he licked his lips. His groin tingled against the mattress. He had to get out of there.

“Can you just... stay? Please?” Conner loosened his hold on him. His breathing became rhythmic and deep.

Shit, was he asleep already? Kai searched Conner’s face, the thick lashes, the scar under his eye, the plump lips, slightly parted. Damn, he’d love to kiss those lips again. He sighed. Should he? Conner was passed out. What would it hurt? Desire hummed up his spine. His heart thumped in his ears. Maybe just once. He lowered his head and pressed his lips, ever so lightly, to Conner’s.

Conner pressed back and released a soft moan. In a breathy whisper, he said, “Kai...”

Maybe he wasn’t asleep? Kai lifted his head and stared at Conner. It didn’t matter—he had to go before it got out of hand. The last thing he needed was to relive the day after the graduation party all over again. He pushed up off the bed, Conner’s arms falling off him, then rolled him to his side. Once he was sure Conner couldn’t vomit on himself, he stood, straightened his t-shirt, and snuck out of the apartment.

Kai drove his blazer into the carport of his duplex, parking behind Bryce’s white Toyota Corolla, turned the engine off, and let out a long exhale. What a crazy night. He peered down at his groin. His dick was still at half-mast after being in bed with Conner. Damn it. He was horny as fuck now. With a huff, he got out of the blazer and went for the carport door. Hopefully, Bryce wouldn’t want to bother him.

As he came through the carport door, he shut it as quietly as he could. A movie droned on in the main room. Maybe Bryce would be asleep and he could tiptoe by him. He snuck through the kitchen and peeked into the main room.

Bryce lay on the couch, his head tilted up, his mouth hanging open. A beer can rested on the black coffee table.

He crept past Bryce and into his room, then shut the door, locked it, and hurried to undress, tossing his clothes in a heap on the floor. Fuck, I need to get off. Now. As he flipped the red quilt down, his cock hardened. He lay on his bed and shut his eyes, images of Conner flooding his mind. Who needed porn when he had memories of Conner? He twitched one side of his mouth and wrapped his palm and fingers around his shaft, placing slow strokes over it. Sweet friction tingled through his groin. His breath became quick and heavy. He rocked his hips, savoring the sensation. He lost himself in visions of Conner kissing him, thrusting against him, moaning, whispering his name. His cock hardened further and jerked in his hand. His peak teased him. He half whispered, half moaned, “Fuck.”

He pumped faster, need thrumming inside him. He thrust his hips, and as his balls became heavy with release, he fondled his sac with his other hand. “Oh, God.” He tensed his face. Delicious sensation built to an urgent crest. He shuddered over the edge and bucked his hips, his cock spurting cum over his fingers, over his stomach and chest with each surge of orgasm, gasping each time. As it slowed, he let loose a ragged breath and whispered. “Holy shit, Conner, what you do to me.” He pursed his lips. He was never going to get over this fucking crush. Never. Not with Conner living right across the street from the bar.

He sat up, tossed his legs over the side of the bed, and grasped his shirt, then wiped his chest and fingers off. What the hell was he going to do? He tossed the shirt to the floor. Not even five years of not seeing the guy made a difference. He rested his elbows on his knees and placed his face in his hands, his long hair draping around his head. The whole thing was hopeless. He was destined to a life of longing for something he’d never have. His mother was right—he was pathetic, but not like his father. This was a whole different kind of pathetic. Tears stung his eyes. He rubbed them away. Crying about it wasn’t going to help.

He lay down in his bed and drew the sheets and quilt up, staring at the ceiling. Conner was messed up tonight. What the hell had gotten into him? Why did Conner want to be his friend so badly? Did he think he was going to be treated like a fucking VIP at Fountain Bar and Grill if they were friends? He placed his hand over his mouth and chuckled. What a douche. That was so not going to happen.

He rolled to his side and tucked a hand under the pillow. He had the next two days off. He would stay away from the center of town. Then he wouldn’t have to see Conner. Then Conner couldn’t fuck with his heart. He closed his eyes.