The Heartbreak Hotel (Sandy Springs #1)

Chapter Eleven

Riley

Riley closed her cabin door behind them and flicked on the light. The rain continued to hammer against the roof, but the worst of the storm had passed. Ziggy meowed from his spot on the bed, squinting against the brightness, and Ella scampered over to him, leaving drip marks across the floorboards.

“Hello there, handsome,” she murmured, scratching behind his white ears.

Riley stood still on the welcome mat, raindrops rolling down her forehead and arms. The whole ride home, she’d soared higher than the birds in the sky as they’d skipped over the waves, Ella’s arms tight around her waist.

Their kiss had electrified her, filling her veins with a shot of something she hadn’t even known she needed. Hand in hand, they’d sprinted through the rain as it bounced around their ankles, and Riley had brought them both here on autopilot.

But back inside the familiar space of her cabin, reality descended on her, swirling her mind like the storm’s black clouds.

What am I doing?

Ella glanced her way, probably wondering why she hadn’t moved or said anything since they stepped inside.

Riley slipped her sodden shoes off and cleared her throat. “I’ll just get us some towels.”

She pulled two fresh, fluffy ones from the bathroom and handed one to Ella. Now the adrenaline had started to wear off, she could feel the cold seeping through her soaking T-shirt and shorts. She rubbed the towel over her hair as Ella fussed Ziggy. His loud purrs could be heard even over the pouring rain.

Riley’s eyes wandered over Ella’s body. Her yellow dress clung to her curves like a second skin and was incredibly distracting. Especially when she noticed her firm nipples pressing through the material. God.

“Would you like a change of clothes?” she asked.

“That would be great, thanks. ”

She pulled out two clean T-shirts and two pairs of pyjama bottoms and left Ella’s on the bed. “I’ll just get changed in the bathroom. Give you some privacy.”

She left and closed the door before she could cringe over herself. Why was she suddenly being so formal and…strange?

Or was the more apt question, why had she invited a dripping, see-through, incredibly attractive Ella into her cabin after midnight?

Her heart stuttered in her chest, and she leaned forward, grasping the porcelain sink to stare herself in the mirror. Her breathing fogged the glass, terrified blue eyes staring back at her.

What’s the big plan now, Riley?

She should tell Ella to leave. It’d already gone too far.

The memory of her lips made her stomach somersault, and she tightened her grip on the sink.

Being around Ella had a unique effect on her. As though all the chaos in her mind quietened when they touched. It was dizzying but not unclear. Quite the opposite—it was as if she’d put on a pair of Ella-glasses, and everything had come into focus for the first time in years.

But the reality of that was immobilising.

Senhor Arenoso’s furrowed brows and deep-set frown popped into her head. She had to tell him…but he’d be so disappointed. She couldn’t afford to lose the only person she thought of as family. Or her job. She couldn’t be like António.

Her mind was running away with itself. But what could she do? The thought of sending Ella away after what she’d said at the ruins made her want to vomit. And more importantly, she didn’t want Ella to leave. She didn’t want her own fear to be the reason this feeling ended.

She sucked in a few deep breaths, letting the sensation wash away the negative energy clogging up her veins. Then she slipped off her wet clothes and got changed, hanging the sodden ones on the radiator.

Sensing she’d been a while, she opened the bathroom door, stopping herself halfway through. “Er—you all good in there?”

Ella laughed. “Sure. You can come back into your own apartment.”

Ella was sitting on the bed, dressed in Riley’s oversized navy T-shirt, one of her old surfing ones from back home. She’d pushed her red hair back off her face, which was flushed and still a little pink from sunburn.

Seeing Ella in her clothes made Riley swallow. She was perfect.

Not helping, brain.

Ella’s dark eyes were focused on her. Even now, in the comfort of unflattering oversized clothing, electricity sizzled between them. She wondered what thoughts were occupying her mind. Was she overthinking this as much as Riley was? Or was this something that happened to her often ?

Since she and Elodie broke up, Riley couldn’t even think about putting her heart in the firing line again. How could she do that when Ella was going to leave in a couple of weeks?

Ziggy hopped onto Ella’s lap, and she giggled, delighted. The sound shot endorphins straight into Riley’s heart as she scratched at his chin, his purrs loud enough to send tremors through the cabin. Riley tucked her hands into her pockets, not knowing what to do with them. Why did it feel like she’d never done this before?

“Would you like a drink?” she asked.

“What do you have?”

“Teas, coffee, water…whisky.”

“What?” Ella’s sudden jump in volume startled Ziggy, and he ran under the bed. She stood, closing the distance between them.

Riley feared for her life.

“This whole time, you’ve had whisky in here?” She shook her head, her eyes wide, but Riley caught the quirk of her mouth. “How many more secrets are you keeping?”

Riley chuckled nervously, retrieving the bottle from the cupboard and pouring two small glasses. She didn’t like to talk about herself. It opened too many trapdoors.

But what did you expect would happen, inviting her back here? Eejit.

Ella checked out the label, letting out a low whistle. “Sixteen years? Nice. You know your whisky.”

“Not really. My dad.” She handed Ella her glass.

“Are you two close? ”

She shook her head. “No. Not really.”

Perhaps sensing she’d stepped into a sensitive topic, Ella didn’t pry, much to Riley’s relief. She swirled the amber liquid with a smirk. “I can’t believe you’ve had this here the whole time. What about Senhor Arenoso’s rules?”

“Let’s just say I know a guy.” She forced a smile she wasn’t really feeling. The implications of all the rules she was breaking piled on top of one another, pushing her further into sinking quicksand.

Did Ella expect them to have sex? What if Riley disappointed her? What happened when Ella left? Should she tell her about the anniversary? About Elodie? How the biggest secret was that she didn’t really have anything together at all?

What was she supposed to do?

Nausea rose in her throat, and her breaths came quick and fast, the glass shaking in her grasp.

What if someone found out and she lost everything again?

“Riley.” Ella’s voice was soft. “Do you want me to leave?”

Riley opened her eyes. Ella’s gaze studied her, the frown line etched deep into her forehead.

“It’s just…a lot.”

Ella pressed her lips together, her eyes darting over Riley’s features. “I’m not expecting…anything, you know. This is all far more than I deserve.”

“Please don’t say things like that.” The sharp edge in Riley’s voice surprised them both.

“I’m just saying. You’ve already saved me twice.” She stepped forward and caressed Riley’s cheek. “As long as we’re on the same page, we’re fine. Talk to me. What do you want?”

Talking was so simple, yet so foreign. But as Ella stroked her cheek with her thumb, the stress and sickness in Riley’s stomach slowly ebbed away. She leaned into the warmth with a sigh, the soft touch grounding her. The intimate gesture soaked into every fibre of her being, with Ella’s big, emotion-filled eyes looking back at her, searching, yearning to go deeper. Their connection seemed to surge between them, radiating from the point of contact on her skin, speaking of something that stretched for several lifetimes, a feeling that scientists could never quite explain.

Her energy. Just…everything that was Ella. Riley couldn’t fight it.

She met Ella’s gaze and uttered softly, “I want you to stay.”

They sank down into Riley’s sofa, and she pulled the orange blanket over them. Ella tucked her legs underneath her, her knees resting against Riley’s. Even that was enough to send flutters to her chest, even through two layers of pyjama bottoms.

Riley sipped at the whisky, hoping it would ease her nerves. With the blinds drawn, the only light came from the lamp she’d acquired from the market, casting a soft, warm glow over the room. The rain continued to thud on the roof, and Riley realised she’d completely lost track of time.

Luckily, tomorrow was Sunday, her one day off in the week, so she didn’t need to worry about that. Or the implications of any of this. The fact that a client was sitting on her sofa, in her cabin, wearing her clothes.

Or the fact that she’d kissed her, and now she was tracing Riley’s forearm with her fingertips.

She tuned back into the feeling, chastising herself for worrying about work. She needed to be present. Who knew how much time she and Ella had? How fast things would change?

Time is a storm in which we are all lost.

She met Ella’s gaze, feeling her heart speed up at the soft swirl in her irises. “I’m sorry. I don’t do this…like, never do this.”

“That’s okay. I don’t either.”

“Really?” She found that hard to believe. Ella laughed, and she straightened her face out, feeling it pinched. “But you’re gorgeous.”

The corners of Ella’s mouth curled. She brushed her fingers down to Riley’s wrist, leaving tingles in their wake. “I could say the same thing about you. Have you looked in a mirror recently? You’re like an Irish beach babe Thor but like…hotter.”

“I don’t think so.” She chuckled and shook her head, wet strands tickling her back.

“I do.”

Their gazes locked. Ella’s hand stilled on Riley’s. Her focus fell to her lips, and all she wanted to do was kiss her again. To feel her body light up the way it had at the ruins. To explore this with her without any fear.

But fear had her in a chokehold.

“Did you mean what you said at the ruins?” she asked instead, her voice barely audible over her thundering heart.

“Which part?”

“All of it.”

Ella looked down at her lap. “I mean, yeah, it’s true my life fell to shit, and that’s why I’m here. But I think I’d been living like that for a long while before.”

Riley recalled what she’d said about her ex-girlfriend/ex-boss. Was that who she’d wanted to phone the other day?

“I guess I never realised how much I was doing just to please other people,” Ella continued. “What I thought I should do. Taking a step back, I can see that a lot of those things weren’t making me happy. Not really.”

Riley knew the feeling.

After what happened with Elodie, she’d chase anything to take her mind off the pain. But running only takes you so far; she had to stop and walk through it to finally see she was just feeding and extending the process.

Some habits she still fell into from time to time.

Her gut soured at the sight of the glass of whisky in her hand. She didn’t want to be like her dad. She downed the liquid so she didn’t have to look at it anymore, then set her glass on the table .

Ella followed suit, spluttering a little as it slid down her throat—an action Riley found far too endearing—and they fell back onto the sofa together, limbs entwined. Ella’s hair had curled from the rain and fallen over her face. Riley’s hands itched to reach out and move it, to trace her jaw with her fingertips, but she wasn’t brave enough.

“Did you mean what you did at the ruins?” Ella asked, and Riley realised she’d been staring at the woman’s mouth again.

Heat flushed her cheeks, nerves multiplying in her belly. Though she was fairly certain of where Ella stood on the kiss, she could never be one hundred percent sure. This was not exactly an everyday situation they found themselves in.

“The kiss, I mean,” Ella confirmed, then adding in a whisper, “Do you regret it?”

Riley’s hand folded over Ella’s instinctively. “I don’t regret it. I kissed you because I wanted to.”

“Okay. Good. Because I don’t want to be something you regret, Riley.”

Riley’s heart fluttered. Ella’s vulnerability called to her in a way that made her want to be brave as well. She looked down at their entwined hands, Ella’s small and warm underneath hers. “I won’t lie to you and say this doesn’t scare me—because it does. I feel completely and utterly out of my depth and…” She chuckled, remembering Ella’s words at the ruins. “Out of my comfort zone. ”

The curl of Ella’s lips told her it was the right answer. Her brown eyes flickered to Riley’s. “What about now?”

There were many things Riley could say to that, complicated and tangled in a mess of other things, so she answered simply. By capturing Ella’s lips with hers.

When she switched off her mind and followed her body’s instincts, it was a no-brainer.

Ella sighed into the kiss, her fingers threading into Riley’s hair and pulling her closer. Her soft lips explored Riley’s, parting her mouth to brush their hot tongues together.

Oh my god.

Everything inside Riley turned to jelly. Soft, pliable putty that Ella could shape in her hands. She played her like her favourite instrument, lighting up music all over her skin, with a loud thumping drum pounding between her legs.

The kiss started softly, quickly intensifying, lighting a fuse that burned all the way up Riley’s spine. Her pulse quickened, the heat blooming outwards, leaving them breathless when they parted.

Those deep brown eyes, flecked with caramel under the warm light, stared back into Riley’s. Her body hummed with Ella’s energy, craving more, needing more.

Those kisses were dangerous. Riley would sign over her soul to Ella as long as she kept kissing her like that.

She hadn’t felt this way in a long time. Not since—

Her brain jolted awake, feeding her with warnings and flashing lights, and she looked away. The boy’s screaming. The headlines. Picking a bloody and drunken Elodie up from the pavement. How a split-second accident upturned their whole lives.

Ella cupped her cheek gently, and the touch grounded Riley, quietening the voices.

“So, how are we going to do this?” Ella asked. “I know we’re not in normal dating circumstances, but…” Riley’s eyes flickered to hers, and a warm, gooey honey spread around her heart. “I don’t want this connection to go to waste.”

“I don’t either.” She sighed, feeling shaky from the adrenaline and endorphins pounding through her system. “And I don’t want to distract from your experience here. The course and everything.”

“Me neither.” That surprised Riley, and Ella laughed at her expression. “Shocking, I know. But I actually want to—god, I can’t believe I’m saying this—but…I want to surrender myself to the course. Like Senhor Arenoso said. I really do want to work on what makes me happy.”

Something like pride washed over Riley, and she smiled. “I’m glad to hear that.”

Ella brushed a hand through Riley’s hair, and she shivered at the touch. “And I obviously don’t want to do anything that would jeopardise your job and life here.”

Riley nodded. No one could know if they explored this further. As the thought passed through her mind, the urge flared to run and hide herself away. There was so much at stake, and she couldn’t end up back where she was four years ago. But she didn’t want to get caught up in the details of the future and the dos and don’ts.

She wanted to be present.

She wanted to be brave.

If she let Ella slip through her fingers without even exploring what their connection could be, it would go against everything she believed in. Not only would she be a hypocrite, she’d also be the world’s biggest eejit.

“I don’t do any of this lightly, Ella,” she said, the fuzz of the alcohol descending on her. “I could lose my job.” Her eyes passed over Ella’s face, studying her expression. Her emotive eyes, full cheeks, soft lips. Those lips.

Ella took her bottom lip into her mouth and bit down on it.

Lord, Jesus.

“That sounds like a lot to risk.” Her hand brushed up Riley’s arm, and the hairs stood to attention, sending a shiver up her spine.

“It is.” Riley tried to focus on the physical sensation instead of her mind threatening to unravel. “But I don’t think I could live with the regret, knowing we both felt like this and did nothing about it. I don’t meet people like you.”

Ella’s alluring eyes flicked to hers, and liquid heat slipped and curled inside Riley’s belly. “Me either.”

But she couldn’t get too attached; Ella was going to leave in a few weeks.

Shut up, brain.

She cleared her throat. “Okay. So how about we keep the days for the course, and we can see each other in the evening? Keep it separate?”

“That works. I don’t do anything in the evening anyway, apart from listen to Pauline’s gossip.” Ella gave a soft smile, tracing gentle circles over Riley’s skin. “And I won’t tell anyone about us. Well, apart from maybe my best friend Winnie. Or my mother if she asks. But actually maybe n—”

Riley raised her eyebrows. “You’re gonna tell your mum about me? That seems pretty fast,” she teased.

Ella laughed. “Fine. No mothers. No days. And no telling people.”

The confirmation made Riley shake her head. What am I doing? She exhaled, letting the voice fade into the background and focusing on Ella. A grin crept onto her face. “Well, maybe not all days. I think it’s only fair you have to step out of your comfort zone, too.”

“Oh, no. Why do I not like the look of that smile?”

Riley chuckled. “I think you should come to one of my surfing classes.”

Ella groaned. “Riley, have you not witnessed this island trying to kill me—on more than one occasion?”

“And I’ve saved you—on more than one occasion.”

Their gazes locked, and the charged current sizzled between them, fanning the flame already burning in her chest.

“I suppose that’s true.”

“So, is that a yes?”

The corner of Ella’s mouth lifted, and Riley leaned forward to kiss her.

She could get used to that.