The Heartbreak Hotel (Sandy Springs #1)

Chapter Thirteen

Ella

To Ella’s surprise, the morning’s yoga class helped clear her brain fog. Doubts about whatever was going on with her and Riley fell to the back of her mind, despite the gorgeous woman’s voice calling out breathing timings for the group. Maybe whatever was developing between them had come at the wrong time. Ella needed to want change for herself, not for Riley, and she needed to focus on that.

Maybe it’s perfect timing , her heart called back at her. Maybe they were meant to meet here. Even now, sparks crackled in the air between them, dancing, waiting for that moment for their eyes to connect and the feeling to swarm around her like butterflies.

Regardless, Ella needed to focus on herself first. Beautiful blondes after. That was the deal.

And for god’s sake, she had to enjoy her time here. A week had already passed, and before she knew it, she’d be back traipsing the rainy English streets with only memories of the sunshine to keep her warm.

That was why she’d agreed to attend Riley’s surfing class this afternoon, even though the thought terrified her. Her body wasn’t made for exercise, especially not “trying to stay balanced on a moving board hurtling over the waves” type of exercise.

Riley called the class to a close, and Ella opened her eyes, catching her watching from the front of the courtyard. Riley grinned, and the electric sizzles spread through Ella’s veins, giving her wings. Really, she couldn’t believe her luck that Riley was into her at all. She needed to remember that.

She rolled up her mat and stored it in the cubby, Pauline following close behind her and breathing down her neck like a wildebeest.

“That was a great class. Don’t you think?” She wedged her purple mat next to Ella’s. “I can feel my mind settling more and more with every session.” She brought her hands together in front of her face. “ Namaste .”

“That’s great, Pauline.”

She puffed out her bosom. “And I only had twenty-six thoughts about Albert. ”

“Nice. That’s fifty better than last time.”

They made their way to the front of the class, and Riley looked up as they approached. Nervous jitters surged in Ella’s gut, making her skin tingle. It was impossible to switch off, despite her brain urging her body to behave.

“Good session, ladies.” Ella caught the quirk of Riley’s mouth before she addressed Pauline. “You’re making great progress with the lion’s breath.”

“Thank you,” Pauline gushed, letting out a shrill schoolgirl giggle that pierced Ella’s eardrums.

Riley’s gaze flicked to Ella. “I’ll see you at the surf class later.”

Ella nodded, trying to ignore the butterflies. “Yep. See you then.”

They bowed and then headed their separate ways. Pauline chittered in Ella’s ear as they headed to breakfast.

“My eyes aren’t as sharp as they used to be.” She linked her arm through Ella’s, and her flowery perfume invaded her nostrils. “But I’m sure Riley was wearing the same shorts you were yesterday.”

Ella tensed. Oh fuck. Pauline had given her the third degree when she got home—until she’d managed to distract her with the cakes she’d bought from the market.

“Not this again,” Ella grumbled.

“I’m just saying, hun. Quite the coincidence is all.” Her sandals clunked against the stone underfoot. She nudged Ella in the ribs. “I think she likes you.”

Ella sighed. The woman rivalled Miss Marple lately—if Miss Marple smelt like talc and loved to wear mismatching prints. “I don’t think so.”

“I saw the way she smiled just then. The smile of young love.”

“Pauline.” Ella rolled her eyes and let out another huff. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. Maybe she’s smiling at you. Checking out that neon tennis skirt.”

“Hmm. Perhaps it’s possible she does like an older woman. I read that’s popular among the LBQGT+.”

Ella laughed. “LGBTQ+. And yeah…she’s not wrong. Maybe Riley likes that too.”

Pauline giggled, something resembling a horse’s whinny. “You really think so?”

Shit . Ella didn’t mean to take the heat off her by throwing Riley under the lovin’-older-ladies express, but something about the idea had tickled her. And it worked—Pauline spent the majority of breakfast discussing the many ways to let Riley down gently.

Afterwards, Ella met Senhor Arenoso at his hut on the cliffs. As before, he was sitting cross-legged in the centre of the room, a soft breeze through the open doors swirling his burgundy kaftan. But instead of his dark hair brushing past his shoulders, today, it hung in a thick braid down his back.

Ella waited outside the door, looking out over the waves as they crashed against the rocks. Hopefully that won’t be me later.

“Ella.” His deep voice beckoned, and she turned her head. “Welcome back. ”

“ Bom dia , Senhor.”

His eyes combed her face, and the tips of his moustache twitched as he smiled. “Good morning, indeed. It seems the island is serving you well.”

When he didn’t expand, Ella swallowed. Did he mean Riley? Did Romeo say something?

“What do you mean?” she asked, her voice small as she took a seat on the same chair she’d sat before. A mix of sandalwood and cinnamon was burning away on the shelf, pillowing small plumes of smoke into the air.

Senhor Arenoso rose to boil the kettle before turning back to her. He interlaced his fingers, and she briefly admired his selection of gold rings. “I sense your chakras unblocking. You’ve taken a step onto your path. How does it feel?”

She let out a breath, relieved she didn’t have to spin a Pauline-Riley distraction story here, too. “Good.”

He nodded, his impassive face not giving anything away. “So, Ella, tell me. What is it that you want?”

Her horny brain projected Riley’s strong legs wrapped around her head, but she looked past it, ignoring the pulse awakening between her thighs.

She needed to focus on herself. God dammit.

Her mind argued that Riley making her come was focusing on herself.

It was going to be one of those days.

She scrambled, trying to find something intelligent to say and ignore the throbbing in her underwear. Her eyes locked on the owl totem hanging around his neck .

“Is that your spirit guide?” she asked.

“Yes.” He stroked the metal, his curious eyes studying Ella’s face. “Is that something that you want to get in touch with?”

Ella nodded, and Senhor Arenoso turned to make the tea. Admittedly, she was curious. If Riley was a dolphin, what would she be? A tiger? A shark? A wolf? She’d been told on more than one occasion that she had a sharp tongue.

“That’s good,” he murmured, before asking over his shoulder, “would you like the same as last time?”

“No, thank you. I’d like Yorkshire Tea, if you have it.”

He chuckled, a warm, throaty sound that seemed to echo in the small space. “As luck would have it, I do.”

All she needed now were some Jaffa Cakes, and it’d be just like home.

Once he’d made the drinks, Senhor Arenoso handed Ella a mug and leaned back against the table.

“The owl is a powerful spirit guide,” he started. “It has a deep connection to wisdom and the ability to see things most cannot. However, that doesn’t mean it isn’t without its darkness. Everyone is a balance between light and dark, no matter who they are.

“Guides come to us in many forms, but their common focus is to help us back into alignment with the universe. To do that, you have to listen. The guide is part of your inner self, Ella. If you shut that out, then alignment is impossible.” He tilted his head. “Even in one week, I can feel you starting to listen to the world around you again. Would you agree?”

The island had pushed Ella to her limits, turned her inside out, and frustrated her, but yes, being in nature and away from her phone had eventually made her feel more like herself again. Whoever that person was.

When she didn’t elaborate, he sipped from his tea. “I understand you still have resistance. Resistance to happiness. Resistance to freedom. Resistance to love.”

Her eyebrows furrowed, and her mouth opened before she could stop it. “I don’t resist love. Love is all I’ve ever wanted.” Heat spread up her neck at the admission.

She hated the idea of wanting to be loved. It felt weak and pathetic, like admitting she wasn’t worthy enough for it just to be a given. Winnie seemed to find love wherever she went, sticking to her like Velcro.

But Ella had to fight to keep Maeve’s attention, twisting herself into someone she thought she wanted her to be, trying to latch onto things that ultimately just weighed her down.

It wasn’t just Maeve, either. Ella had to work twice as hard at everything to even hope to come close to Devin’s achievements. Without anything to show, she feared her parents might retreat, turning their love into a supermarket checkout transaction. One promotion equals one belly rub and a pat on the back.

It was exhausting trying to be what she thought she needed to be all the time .

Senhor Arenoso was watching her closely, as though he followed her every thought. “Humans rely on fear as a way of protecting themselves from disappointment, hurt, and heartbreak. You probably don’t realise it half of the time, but when we function from places of fear, our thoughts and actions pollute the energy around us, and that’s what we attract back. Shedding those fears and resistance is where the real Ella, the Ella hidden deep beneath all those layers, can heal and love freely.”

Ella wanted to tell him he was wrong, but the words wouldn’t form in her mouth. She knew she needed to change. The island had alluded to that many times. But more than that, she felt it herself. It was time for Ella 2.0.

“I suppose you’re right,” she admitted, tracing her finger over the mug and feeling the heat beneath the ceramic. “What do I have to do?”

“Unpicking and unlearning habits take time. There’s no easy route. But opening up to the world and recognising your own limitations is a great place to start.”

“I don’t want the easy route. I want to do this properly.”

“ Excelente .” He grinned, revealing a small gap in his teeth, before adopting a more serious tone. “The difficult part will be remembering all this after you return to the busy modern world. When you receive your totem and learn of your guide at the fire ceremony, this is how you will keep the peace within you. They’re already there, Ella. Here with you in this moment. You just have to listen. ”

Ella squeezed the mug tighter. She didn’t want to be disrespectful, but she wondered why her spirit guide was so keen on playing hide-and-seek. And why they were so incredibly horny. “Okay. I’m ready. Let’s do this.”

Senhor Arenoso sipped from his mug with a nod. “We are making excellent progress. Let’s continue.”

* * *

Ella’s mind had taken a beating at Senhor Arenoso’s class. Now, it was time for her body.

The gentle waves helped ease her fears of being swept away in the ocean current again, but lying on the sand pretending to surf did little to ease her fear of looking stupid. Luckily, there were three others doing the same, so she went for it. Unluckily, she was lying next to Pauline, whose joints popped and clicked with every movement, like a one-woman percussion band.

Ella wondered if the older woman’s sudden interest in the sport had anything to do with Riley.

After practising positioning on the sand like marooned whales, they took the boards into the shallow water, getting a feel of the waves. Lying-down surfing seemed the way to go. The rush of the waves cresting around her as they pushed her body along were much more appealing than the thought of falling and ending up with body parts in different places.

Riley waded through the water to her, dimples deep in her cheeks. “You’re looking good out there.”

“Don’t sound too surprised.”

Riley grinned, sweeping a hand through her long hair so it fell down her back. Ella’s eyes were drawn to the toned muscles in her arms, then the tight swimsuit caressing the rest of her tanned body, until Pauline’s excited screams made them turn their heads. Her limbs were spread like a starfish as her board crept onto the sand in slow motion. She lay there for a few seconds before struggling to her feet.

“Did you see that, Riley?” she called.

“Great work, Pauline. Keep it up.” Riley turned back to Ella, an inquisitive look in her eyes. “I have to admit I was surprised to see her sign up for this. Has she said anything to you?”

So much for “letting Riley down gently” . Ella bit her lip to stop the chuckle forming in her throat. “Maybe her guide is a dolphin, like you.”

“Or a starfish, perhaps.”

Their eyes locked, and a slow smile spread across Riley’s face. One that made all of the world shrink around them and Ella’s insides turn to jelly.

As though she suddenly remembered they weren’t alone, Riley broke contact, swishing her hands through the water before returning Ella’s gaze, but this time her expression was much softer. “You ready to give standing a go?”

“Really? Already?”

“I think you can handle it. ”

Ella felt the fear creeping up her spine but exhaled, embracing it. If it all went tits up, at least it was an excuse for Riley to manhandle her again.

They paddled further out into the ocean so they were waist-deep. Ella clung to her board as Riley recapped the instructions. She needed to lift her chest, keep her balance and focus her eyes where she wanted to go.

Riley squeezed her arm. “You’ve got this, Ells.”

Ella’s head swivelled at the nickname, and her heart swelled. Ells. There was something about the personal touch that gave her wings. She flashed Riley a wink, then started paddling forward, cutting her arms through the water. The wave lifted the board, and she hesitated, fear immobilising her muscles.

“Pop up!” Riley encouraged.

She forced her legs to move, straddling the line in the middle of the board. She wobbled, legs shaking as she stepped into a crouch. She leaned left, almost stumbled, but managed to right herself. Spray coated her, some saltwater going in her mouth. She glided forward, trying to spit, the board wriggling with a life of its own underneath her. She hit a bump and almost tumbled headfirst into the sea.

“Ahh!” she shouted, tearing her eyes from the board to look at the shore.

But she was already there. She’d made it.

The group applauded and whistled, Pauline’s voice carrying above the others. Not sure how to dismount, Ella flopped off, landing in the shallows on her arse and splashing everyone nearby. But she didn’t care. Nothing could wipe the smile off her face. She’d never thought of herself as athletic. Now, she could add it to her résumé.

Riley ran towards her, the gay equivalent of a Baywatch babe, kicking spray in every direction. “That was amazing!”

Ella laughed, throwing her head back and taking in the blue sky above them. It fucking felt amazing too.

They stood, chests heaving, taking in each other’s smiling faces. Flooded with the urge to kiss Riley’s gorgeous mouth, Ella’s body hummed. Did she have to look so utterly kissable? She wanted to taste every inch of her perfect freckled skin, trace the lines of her muscles with her tongue. She dug her nails into her palm to focus on something else.

From the way Riley’s gaze continued to focus on her lips, Ella wondered if she was in the same predicament. She hoped so.

“You coming in for another?” Riley asked.

Ella shook her head, feeling the ache in her muscles. “I’ll think I’ll end on a high today.” She lowered her voice, even though the others were far enough away in the sea. “But why don’t you go show me how it’s done?”

Riley’s mouth quirked. “Would you like that?”

“Definitely. Any excuse to ogle you.”

Riley laughed, threw Ella a wink that made her insides clench, then grabbed her board and paddled out into the sea. The waves were only small in this area of the beach, supposedly easier for learners to grasp, but within seconds, Riley caught one, popping up onto her feet.

She weaved effortlessly over the wave, turning left and right, her hair flowing out behind her. The cocky bastard even threw a smirk in Ella’s direction, and she loved it. The woman was sexy as hell.

“Riley, look at me!” Pauline shouted, sliding onto the shore with the elegance of a sea slug. “Ahh!”

Riley glanced behind her, and her board slipped from under her feet, catapulting into the air. It spun and twisted before landing on top of her with a splash.

Shit.

Ella scrambled towards her in the water, breathing out a sigh of relief when her head popped up through the waves. The relief was short-lived when a groan left Riley’s mouth, and her hands flew up to cup her nose. Blood seeped through her fingers, trickling down her neck and into the water below.