The Hidden God of Open Doors

4

Raider can’t wait until after his meeting the next morning. He dashes off a quick “Good morning, cutie” through a bleary squint at his phone, before he even makes coffee. Seven in the morning shouldn’t be a real time.

Rune’s reply is immediate.

Rune: Good morning!

Raider: Wow, you’re up early

Raider: Or maybe not. What time is it for you?

There’s a long pause after that. Raider’s coffee and loaded bagel are ready by the time his phone dings again.

Rune: 7:30 AM

Raider: Cool, same time zone :)

Raider sends a photo of his coffee and bagel. Nothing fit for social media—the bagel’s a delicious bacon-y mess on the garage sale plate. The coffee is in a chipped, sickly green mug that says I Robbed the Royal Museum and All I Got Was This Cursed Mug.

Not actually cursed. Raider thoroughly tested it after Val gave it to him five birthdays ago.

Raider: Have you eaten yet?

Rune: Not yet.

Raider: Then I can’t ask what you’re eating… awesome. What are you wearing? ;)

There’s another long pause. Raider doesn’t mind. He imagines the pretty young man in the photo staring at the phone screen and squirming—and the mental image is appealing. Rune is clearly nervous about this whole Cupid match thing, but being patient with him is easy.

Raider’s phone doesn’t ding again until he’s already downstairs. The empty shop front is serene, all gold and shadows in the early morning light. The pale wood shelves and cabinets are still empty, filled only with possibilities. Raider unlocks the front door, then leans against the counter to open the Heart2Heart app.

Instead of a message, there’s a photo.

A blurry, soft photo of Rune standing in front of a full-length mirror. The photo cuts off at his neck, showing just a hint of long hair sweeping over his shoulders. He holds the phone with both hands in front of his chest, and he’s wearing the same tie-dye shirt as in his profile photo.

This new photo shows that the shirt is baggy, comfortably shapeless, all blurry pink and purple and teal. It’s too big for Rune’s narrow frame, and the hem falls midway down Rune’s thighs.

Rune’s smooth, bare thighs.

Raider’s mouth waters at the sleek lines of brown skin. He wants more than anything to reach under the hem of that baggy shirt to see what—if anything—Rune is wearing underneath.

Operating on pure horny reflex, Raider saves the photo to his phone before replying.

Raider: You know how you were worried you weren’t good at this dating app thing?

Raider: Stop fucking worrying

Raider: You’re a master

Rune types for a full five minutes before sending a simple smile emoji.

***

A few weeks pass, until Raider doesn’t know what he was worried about either. Why did he resist Val’s amazing ideas for so long? Not that Raider intends to tell her that. But online dating is a fucking breeze.

At least, talking to Rune is easy.

They switch to texting after the first few days. There’s something weird about Rune’s phone number—it shows up as Unknown Number and Raider can’t figure out how to see the actual number. But Rune can text Raider’s number just fine, and replying in the same thread works like texting anyone else.

Talking to Rune feels so natural. Raider’s a month away from opening Artifacts, Alchemy, Etc., but some nights, he’s more excited about talking to Rune than about his new business.

Even telling Rune about the immortality thing is easier than expected.

Rune: You asked why I don’t have a boyfriend… why don’t you?

Raider: It’s a little complicated. Val and I sort of accidentally drank from the Fountain of Youth on a job

Rune: Accidentally?

Raider: We thought it was another fake, lol. There are a bunch of knockoffs that just rejuvenate you a bit. Clear your pores, firm up your ass a bit. But turns out no… we’re actually immortal now

Raider: I’m not complaining, but it makes long-term relationship planning tough. My long-term is different than most people’s

Raider: It’s fine if that’s a problem for you

Rune: No, it’s a good thing.

Rune: I like the thought of you living forever :)

Val knows something’s up. Raider meets her at least once a week for beer and pizza, and she picks up on it immediately. She’s very intelligent and dangerously good at reading people. She always picked out the right person to bribe for information about local legends.

But Val doesn’t need to be intelligent with the way Raider grins sappily every time he sets down his beer to answer a text. “So, what do you say?”

“What?” Raider asks, looking up from his phone.

Val points. “You’re smiling like an idiot.”

Raider rolls his eyes and hits send on one more message to Rune. “Okay, fine. You were right. That app was a good idea.”

“Holy shit.” Val covers her mouth on a mocking gasp. “That should have taken way longer to get out of you. Who is he, and when’s the wedding?”

“Right after yours. How many vampire brides have you collected now?”

“What? No!” Val waves her hands. “I’m not marrying Grizelda or Severina, and you aren’t changing the subject. Are you at least doing something for next week?”

But Raider’s as stubborn as she is, and he’s changing the subject. Next week is Valentine’s Day, and Raider’s only plans are (definitely) texting Rune and (probably) jerking off to blurry selfies.

There’s something special about Rune. Raider wants to keep him all to himself until he’s figured him out. Raider and Val spent so long hunting artifacts and treasure together, defusing ancient ritual traps, restoring ancient artifacts to their rightful homes.

Raider wants something for himself.

Besides, this thing with Rune is still casual. Still new. They haven’t even voice-called yet—no way is Raider telling Val about him.

That thought rattles around Raider’s head later that night, while he puts away a month’s worth of laundry. Piles of clean towels and T-shirts and jeans sprawl across his king-sized bed. As his incoherent cleaning playlist blasts alt rock, country, and opera, Raider wonders what Rune’s voice sounds like.

Bad thought. Phone calls are a slippery slope. Rune doesn’t want to meet in person, and Raider is fine with that.

Really, totally fine with that.

Catching up on all his chores and tidying up his apartment above the shop is what Raider would be doing anyway. He’s not cleaning up on the off chance he gets to bring someone besides Val over.

Which is good, because Raider will never be done folding laundry at this rate. He keeps pausing to text Rune back.

Rune: Will it be dangerous keeping so many valuable artifacts in one place?

Raider: I’ve got security systems. And trust me, I can handle trespassers ;)

Rune: What about the magic artifacts though? Would they interact with each other?

Raider: Oh, I’m not keeping anything super dangerous in the main shop. No scary curses

Rune: That’s good.

Rune is so interested in everything Raider does, from his shop to his evening runs to what he eats for breakfast. Even if it’s the same coffee and bagel every morning. Raider thought Rune was faking the interest at first. Then he was flattered by it.

Now? Raider’s getting worried. The adorable, shy young man seems so lonely.

I’m alone a lot , Rune’s H2H profile says. So far, “a lot” seems to be “all the time.” Rune is always available to talk, at any hour. He’s vague about how he spends his days. Every time Raider tries angling for information, Rune deflects.

There’s something strange about Rune’s photos too. Not Rune himself, who appears perfect in every way. Not the awkward, blurry angles—the inexpert selfies are very charming. But something is odd about the background rooms. Raider can’t quite put his finger on it, however many times he flips through the collection saved to his phone.

Maybe Raider is imagining things. No more treasure hunts, and setting up the shop is going too smoothly. Maybe Raider’s so desperate for a new quest, he’s turning this H2H match into a mystery to solve.

The speculation might be unfair. This is casual. Super casual. Just like Raider told Cupid he wanted.

Rune: You should get a cat.

Raider: Yeah?

Rune: You clearly like them. All of your funny image memes are about cats.

Raider: Maybe I should. My parents have dogs, but I used to travel too much to have my own pet

Raider: Do you have any pets?

Raider: If you have pets and haven’t sent photos, I’m going to be very cross with you

Rune: Please don’t be cross! I haven’t withheld any pet photos

Rune sends a laughing emoji, proving he isn’t actually distressed. Raider chews his lip, then gives into his urge to pry.

Raider: Are you allowed to have pets at your place? Or would your landlord or roommates not like it?

Sure enough, there’s that telltale pause as Rune figures out how to avoid answering. What kind of life is Rune living that he has so much to conceal but so little practice concealing it?

Raider wrestles two fitted sheets into submission before the reply buzzes into his phone.

Rune: Maybe you shouldn’t get a cat.

Rune: I don’t know how I feel about someone else getting to sit on your lap.

Raider nearly drops his phone. His heart thuds louder than the operatic aria currently blasting. Every nerve in his body buzzes alive, and he can’t even care that Rune is blatantly changing the subject. Because Raider’s every drop of immortal blood is extremely interested in this new topic.

Rune: Sorry, was that too much?

Rune: That was probably too much. I wish I was better at this.

Raider: You’re doing just fine, cutie. I know one way you could improve, though

Raider: Let me see if your ass is as cute as the rest of you

Rune starts typing. Then stops typing. Starts and stops several times before a deliciously long pause. Then the photo arrives, and Raider’s fingers are too clumsy to type a reply.

He sits heavily on his bed, right on a bunch of clean towels, and taps the music off. As silence crashes over him, he calls Rune’s unknown number.