6. Alena
There’s pounding music all around, each song blending seamlessly into the next. The lights sway above, flaring slightly in my vision, and the passage of time doesn’t even cross my mind.
There’s only Katja, the fourth drink in my hand, and the alcohol in my veins. It hits me hard, making me feel weightless and bold. I sway slowly in time to the music, gently snapping my fingers on one hand while the other balances my drink as condensation slowly rolls down my fingertips. I close my eyes, and the world melts away.
Pain from my heels becomes an afterthought. The smothering warmth from the sea of bodies around me turns into an alluring heat, and I rock and sway in time to each bass-filled thump.
Katja is next to me, dancing the same, and when I open my eyes, her bright blue eyes catch the light. She grins at me, and I mirror the smile. Sweat clings to me like a second skin, and together, we sparkle from the glitter that’s sprayed through the air. I’m too hot, but I don’t care. Ever since my second Strawberry Woo-Woo, there hasn’t been a single worry in my mind.
A lull in the music brings Katja closer, and she pants alongside me.
“Another drink?” she calls over the thump of the music.
Just as I’m about to answer, two glasses of ice swimming in red liquid appear before us.
“Drinks, ladies?”
Two men have joined us, clutching a cocktail each in one hand and a beer in the other. One is tall and handsome with dark skin, darker eyes, and sweeping twists on top of his head. When he smiles, it’s dazzling and my heart skips a beat. The other is just as tall, with honey skin and green eyes that sparkle like gemstones. Katja’s mouth drops open at the sight of him, and I giggle.
“Sure!”
I lose track of our empty glasses, clutching my fresh drink and downing it quickly. The chilled liquid is a godsend with the heat of the club, and my tall, dark stranger chuckles deeply at my eagerness.
He leans close to me, his broad chest brushing against my shoulder, and this close, I can see sculpted muscle peeking out from the V of his silver top.
“What’s your name?” he asks, somehow soft yet not needing to yell over the music.
I catch Katja’s eye.
Is this it? The moment where we can be someone new? Where I can take control of one part of our future, free from consequences, before the cell door of marriage crashes closed behind me?
“Amy,” I call back. “And this is my friend, Marie.”
Katja bursts out laughing and leans into her green-eyed man. Within moments, they’re dancing alongside us in time to the music, and I’m utterly enthralled by him. He smells like flowers and wood mingling together, and each time he smiles, my heart lifts.
“I’m Ray,” he says, then he tilts his head to his friend who now has his arms wound around Katja. “That’s Mark.”
“Nice to meet you,” I call. The flow of the music makes me turn, and suddenly, his thick chest is pressed up against my back. His warmth is searing, and thick arms come around my waist. His hands linger just by my hips, and then he grinds into me with a slow roll of his hips. My stomach lurches and excited butterflies escape through my chest.
“What do you do, Ray?” I ask, desperate for a taste of normality outside of my mind.
“I’m a stockbroker,” Ray replies, his lips brushing the shell of my ear. “You?”
“I’m a dancer.”
“I can tell.” He chuckles deeply, and tingles spark across my bare, overheated skin. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Katja in a similar situation with Mark.
This really is it.
The music swells louder, drowning out everything else, and I grind back against Ray, closing my eyes.
Only, when I turn my thoughts to the arms around me and the body swaying with mine, Ray vanishes. In his place is Kristof, and my heart jumps into my throat.
His arms hold me close, and each breath is filled with the smells of leather, woody cologne, and a tinge of smoke. When he whispers in my ear, his short beard grazes my shoulder. I press back into his hold and roll my hips, trying to entice a reaction from what’s sure to be an impressive cock. A man like Kristof, there’s no way he isn’t excellent in bed.
I’ve fantasized about it countless times on the end of my own fingers, reaching an end that’s never quite satisfying enough. But here, with the loud music, the bodies writhing around us, and sex in the air, I know I can entice him. If I’m sexy enough, if I’m enticing enough, I can make him mine.
I want him so badly that my core aches and my pussy squeezes with need. Taking a breath, I turn around and open my eyes.
Ray stares back at me with dark eyes, and he slowly licks his lower lip, his hand sliding slowly up my back.
Not Kristof.
Never Kristof.
Ray leans in, his lips an inch from mine, but before he makes contact, something stops me. My first and only kiss was with Kristof. I’m not quite ready to give up that memory yet.
Placing a hand on Ray’s chest, I stop him and smile.
“Bathroom, sorry!”
Ray smiles, a dazzling grin, but there’s a flash of disappointment in his eyes. Turning to Katja, I’m slightly unsteady and a gasp lurches from me. Katja is locking lips with Mark and seemingly enjoying it from the way her body is plastered to him.
“Ka—Marie!”
She doesn’t respond.
“Marie!”
Katja jerks back from Mark and wipes her lower lip with a dazed smile as our eyes meet.
“Bathroom?” I ask, and she nods, then she pats Mark’s cheek.
“Don’t move, sexy!”
I clutch her hand, and Katja laughs happily. Then we stumble together through the crowd, seeking out the bathroom.
Even with alcohol running through my system and dampening my thoughts, Kristof still remains at the forefront and it’s frustrating. So easily, he consumes me, and even here, he’s about to get in the way of my taking control of my first time.
As we stumble into the cooler bathroom, I make a decision. It’s one that grows stronger as I stumble into a stall and slam the door behind me.
When I go back out there, I’m going to kiss Ray until he puts his dick inside me. I can’t take any chances.
Katja starts up a giggling conversation with another woman in the bathroom, but the words don’t make it over the thumping sound of my own heart. I flop down onto the toilet, just managing to get my dress up, and then I pee like a fucking champion.
Why does alcohol make you pee so damn much?
Finishing up, I head out of the stall and pass Katja, who messily kisses my cheek on the way past and takes my stall. She looks happier and more alive than I’ve ever seen her.
Then I catch sight of myself in the mirror as I wash my hands, and I barely recognize myself. My eyes are wide, pupils blown from the dull light outside. My cheeks are flushed full of color, and my hair is falling loose from its style. The red blush travels down my neck and over my breastbone, but thankfully, my liner is still in the same place.
I look like a real person. A real woman out for the night before I go back to my empty flat and my cat and my mundane office job. That’s my dream.
Sort of. Maybe not so boring.
Katja stumbles out of the stall with a laugh and joins me.
“Alcohol and heels do not go together.” She grins. Our eyes meet in the mirror. “Are you okay?”
“I’m amazing.” I grin at her. “You?”
“I never want to leave!” Her hands land on my shoulders. “Isn’t this just the most fun you’ve ever had in your entire life?”
“It is.” I laugh. “Although I feel a little dizzy, is that normal?” I ask as if Katja has years of clubbing experience.
“Yes, I think so,” she assures me, lifting one hand to my cheek.
“And you kissed him!” I squeal suddenly. “Oh, my God, your first kiss. How was it?”
“Wet.” Katja giggles. “But nice. He tastes like beer, though, and I don’t like that, but that’s normal, right?”
“Yes, absolutely.” As the words leave me, I realize there’s actually nothing I disliked about my first kiss, but these details hardly matter now.
Katja steps away and splashes some water onto her face, then she takes my hand and her water-chilled fingers are a relief against the heat.
“Ready?” she asks softly.
“Ray and Mark won’t know what hit them.”
Together, we head back out into the club, and while we’re faced with a sea of people, it’s surprisingly easy to find Ray and Mark again. The moment they see us, they both smile brightly, and Katja leaves me to sink back into Mark’s arms. Their mouths collide in another kiss, and Ray slips one arm around my waist.
“All good?” he asks in that soft voice of his. He’s lovely. He really is. He’s tall and sexy, his touch is gentle, and yet as he leans in again for a kiss, something stops me again. Like it’s not right. I turn away, and his lips brush my cheekbone, then he pulls back, and the surprise is clear.
I need Ray. I need him to take me and give me the best night of my life before I’m carted away, and yet, each time we get close, it’s like a wall goes up. A voice in my mind reminds me that no one on Earth will be as good as Kristof, so why even try?
“Are you okay?” Ray asks, the second kiss denial being enough for him to pull back slightly. I search my drunken thoughts for an excuse, but then Katja’s hand is on my arm. She’s still in Mark’s arms, but her attention is on me.
“She’s just shy,” Katja teases. “Bad ex, y’know?”
Ray nods knowingly, and his light smile turns mischievous.
“Ahh, a bit of a tease, eh?”
“Sure.” I laugh. “Maybe you haven’t earned it yet.”
“Alright, alright.” He chuckles. “What will make you loosen up? Another drink?”
“You don’t think I’m loose?” Teasing, I spin slowly in his arms, wondering if it’s just the kiss that bothers me. Maybe I can achieve my goal without locking lips.
“Maybe you’re just not good enough, Ray. Your game is tanking, man.” Mark laughs.
“Hey, my game is top-notch.” Ray snorts, and his large hands stroke down my waist and he pulls me against him so firmly that I gasp. That slight forcefulness sends a spark through me, and I bite my lower lip, staring up at him.
More of that and maybe I’m interested.
“I dunno,” I tease, walking one hand slowly up his damp chest. “Maybe you’re just not exciting enough.”
His grip tightens, and a thrill shoots through me.
Yes.
“You want excitement?” Ray’s eyes narrow and he leans closer. “How about you show me just how exciting you can be and I’ll think about it?”
“Oh yeah?” My brow lifts. “How am I going to do that?”
“You said you’re a dancer, right?”
I nod, my heart racing.
“Show us.”
Mark and Katja sway back into view beside me, and Mark laughs.
“She’d never,” he said. His assumption immediately ignites something inside me, a heated desire to prove him wrong as if he’s just another guard from my father’s estate.
“I would,” I shoot back. With drunken confidence, I jut my chin out slightly, and Ray laughs, turning me around slowly to face one of the stages.
“Then get up there and dance. Unless you’re all talk, in which case I guess I’ll just go find someone else.”
Those words spur me forward. I need him. I need him to stay. I need him to be a part of my night. He might be right. Maybe I need one more exciting thing to truly free me from the shackles I’m trying to escape. Glancing over my shoulder, I smirk.
“Alright. Prepare to eat your words.”
Pole dancing.
I’ve never done such a daring and obscene thing, but it’s so separated from everything I know that it excites me. With other people around me doing the same thing, it shouldn’t be too difficult to mirror.
I approach the stage, and a man dressed in black holds out a hand, ready to help me up.
I take a breath, then I take his hand.