Chapter 30
CHAPTER 30
K ara
“What did you want to be when you grew up?” I asked just before I took a bite of the most delicious Greek food I’d had to date. Although as of yet I hadn’t been given the experience of tasting his mother’s food I’d heard so much about.
Havros spit out a portion of his wine, immediately grabbing the linen napkin from his lap and wiping the drops covering his mouth.
I laughed as he coughed, immediately reaching for my pen so I could capture the correct answer.
If he gave me one.
I’d often envisioned him as a kid who’d walked around in suits from the time he was six or seven, emulating his dad as often as possible. I couldn’t take my eyes off him, the light breeze of the early afternoon tousling several strands of his hair. He was much more casual than usual since we’d returned from Sicily, almost able to relax.
Almost.
I doubted that was entirely possible. He was a man on a mission. It had been three days since our return to Greece, three days spent getting to know each other, the powerful man allowing me to hound him with questions. I had close to half a notebook full of wonderful notes, thoughts and bits about the experiences he’d allowed me to share with him.
He tossed the napkin, lifted his eyebrow, and sat back in his seat. We were at yet another gorgeous outdoor café, this time nestled right on the beach. The scent of the Aegean Sea mixed with the incredible smell of delicious food.
“Let me think. At first, I was certain I was going to become a comedian.”
Now I was the one choking on my wine. “What? Are you serious?”
“I am. I watched some variety special when I think I was eight and a comedian was on. I mimicked his act for weeks until my father finally sat me down telling me in no uncertain terms that he would not allow a son of his to ruin the family reputation.”
“So your father dictated the careers of his children.”
When I started to write that down, he gently placed his hand on top of mine. “Don’t write that, Kara. The last thing I want is to disparage my family in any way. We might have a love-hate relationship at times, but I respect my parents in what they tried to do and how they brought us up. If I’d told him I wanted to be a doctor, he would have supported me one hundred percent. Even an attorney or an engineer. What he wanted isn’t so different than any other father. He required the best for us. All four of us.”
“That still didn’t answer the question.”
He rubbed his index finger across my palm, sending a wave of tingles down the center of my back. “I put some thought into being an author. I used to read constantly. I always had a book in my hand. Thrillers. Crime stories. Fairytales. Hell, I didn’t care. My brothers made fun of me, but I kept up the practice even as I began excelling in sports. But honestly, I don’t think there was any doubt that I would end up in the family business.”
“Why?”
“Because my father always made what he did look as if he was having the best time of his life. He’d come home with a smile on his face. He laughed and joked. Yes, of course, I saw him angry several times, but he never took his tough day out on our mother or his children. I admire that in a man.”
Just hearing the way that he talked about his family brought angst about losing mine. While Havros had made a deal with the devil, so to speak, in his search to find answers about my mother, I didn’t put any weight on learning the truth. Maybe there was no direct evidence to find.
Maybe Don Coppola was a snake, vengeful to the end.
I couldn’t dwell on it or I’d lose my mind.
“That’s amazing. You should pen a story someday. Even if you do so for relaxation and nothing more.”
His eyes lit up and he leaned further across the table. “That’s an excellent idea. Now, what did you want to be when you grew up?”
“A ballerina. You see how that worked out. I have long legs, but the rest of me isn’t exactly petite.”
“I think you’d have made an incredible ballerina, but if it’s any consolation, you’re damn good at what you do.” Havros shifted his hand, running his folded fingers under my jaw.
The shivers continued.
I’d held back telling him anything. He wouldn’t understand, but time was running out and I had no other choice. As had happened so many times around this man, my stomach was in knots. A tremendous part of me didn’t want what we shared to be broken. But as with all good fairytales, there was always an end.
“Thank you. I think I’ll stick to what I’m doing. I don’t have that kind of discipline.”
“Now I will agree with that statement.” He laughed, but the look in his eyes darkened. “You’ve been trying to tell me something for days.”
I looked away, pulling my hand into my lap.
“You going to tell me you’re leaving. Yes?”
Sighing, all I could do was nod. I was such a damn coward.
“You were offered a sit down with two major networks who are vying to produce a six-part series, a biopic on mafia organizations set to air next year. Correct?”
I snapped my head in his direction. “How did you know?”
He lifted his glass of wine, the wicked smile I’d seen dozens of times cruising across his handsome face. “I have my connections, Kara. All over the world. This is very important to you and I understand why.”
“So you don’t care I need to leave?”
“Care? I want to chain you to a bed, locking the door and placing guards in and around the house at all times to keep you from escaping. I want to ravage you for hours, so you won’t consider leaving me. I long to kiss every inch of your body, promising you the world. But I won’t do that. This is what you were meant to do.”
While he was boldly offering his support, I could see pain in his eyes, a sadness that threatened to overwhelm him. That crushed my heart, the ache building as it had been doing since Jacob had called. His reaction touched me more than anything we’d shared.
“I want to stay. At least a part of me does, but I can’t. I’ve come too far and I’d put so much work into this. Plus, I’m not certain I can get out of at least talking to them. It might not work out. I’m a consummate businesswoman, after all. If the deal sucks, I won’t go for it.” I laughed nervously while he shook his head.
“Don’t sell yourself short, Kara. Never do that, but also remember this offer, this opportunity is just a steppingstone to an even more fabulous career. If that’s what you want.”
That was the real question at this point. Did I want this badly enough to leave the man who’d rocked my world? I’d asked for divine intervention every night. I’d prayed for a sign telling me which way to go.
The only sign had been the continued strength of our relationship, but there was no testament of love. Havros would never be that kind of man. I’d accepted that, just like I’d come to terms with his life and that danger would be a constant companion. After all the years spent seeking answers, I wanted peace. I craved a simple homelife around family and friends.
“You could come with me,” I told him wistfully.
He dropped his gaze briefly. “If only I could.”
My test had failed.
“I know you can’t and I would never ask you to give up the life you were born into. And incidentally, you’re very good at.”
“I want you safe and happy. That’s all I need.”
That was all he needed. There was an answer. Maybe that was my sign. I’d made the right decision.
“When do you leave?”
I licked my bottom lip, a lump forming in my throat. “Day after tomorrow. I cut it as short as I could, but I have a meeting in New York on Thursday. I need at least a day to settle back in.”
“Understood. I’ll have my jet take you home.”
“You don’t need to do that. I have a commercial flight lined up.”
“You will return in style. That’s what you deserve and something else you need to remember. You are a star.”
A star.
We both noticed Jonas approaching our table. The fact two soldiers had been with us at all times was just another reminder I didn’t need or want this life.
“What is it, Jonas?” Havros asked, his expression highlighting his annoyance.
“I have something to show you, boss. Sorry for the interruption, but I knew you’d want to see this as soon as I did.” He handed Havros a tablet.
While I couldn’t see the screen, I could tell whatever Havros was looking at thrilled him.
“When?” he asked his soldier.
“Evidently last night. There’s nothing left. Blown to bits.”
“How many people?”
“Four. I don’t know anything else at this point, but I’ll keep on it,” Jonas told him. At least this time when he looked at me, he smiled.
I was shocked.
“Find out if one of the bodies belonged to Bernardi. I want positive confirmation,” Havros stated. He’d now fixated his gaze on me, the delight in his eyes remaining.
“You got it, boss.”
As soon as Jonas walked away, I leaned over the table. “He’s dead?”
Havros nodded. “Don Coppola evidently found evidence to corroborate what I told him.”
There was no reason for me to be trembling at this point. Bernardi had been responsible for so much pain for Havros and his family. Yet the news was disturbing. “Who else died?”
“That I do not know.”
“What if it involved children?”
He took time to think about my question instead of offering a flippant answer. “I don’t need to tell you about how dangerous this life is, Kara. It wasn’t my intention by providing the information that any harm would come to women or children. However, there are times it’s unavoidable.”
The lump in my throat only increased in size. “That’s not a good answer, Havros. You can’t toss this aside as if their innocent lives meant nothing. This is what I can’t tolerate about your great world. I honestly don’t want to be a part of it.”
He took a deep breath, a scowl appearing across his face. “I understand, Kara. You won’t need to deal with the atrocities of my life any longer. I’m certain that makes you happy. Let’s go so I can make the arrangements for your flight.”
Hot and cold. Just like I’d come to expect.
He flagged down the waiter and I could sense he was irritated with me. So what? At this point, I was convinced I was doing the right thing.
I only hoped the feeling carried me through the next few weeks. There was no room for looking back, no sense in longing for something that could never be. We lived in two different worlds and that was the end of the story.
Another beautiful day in paradise.
As Havros came up behind me, I stiffened and placed my hand on the window. The morning had dawned like so many other days with a crystal-clear blue sky and fluffy white clouds.
“Good morning, kitten. How did you sleep?” he asked as he rolled his hand over my shoulder and down my arm.
“In truth, not very well.”
“You’re nervous.”
“Yes, but excited.” I didn’t want to belabor how sad I felt in leaving.
“You’re going to have an incredible experience. Just remember everything I told you.” He shifted my hair to the side, kissing the back of my neck.
I closed my eyes, savoring the last few passionate moments we would share. Leaving was perhaps the hardest thing I would ever do in my life. But necessary. Good for me.
Excellent for my career.
I continued to remind myself that I was doing the right thing.
He wrapped his arms around me, slowly untying my robe. I shuddered as he eased the cool material from my shoulders, guiding the material to the floor. As soon as I stood fully naked, I heard his breath catch.
My heart was thumping, tingles crackling over every inch. He rubbed the rough pads of his fingers down my spine and I quivered in response. The reflection highlighted merely a silhouette of his insanely gorgeous body as he stood fully unclothed behind me. Just a single sight of the man could always make my mouth water.
“What time do we need to leave?” I asked.
“We have time, my sweet kitten. Let’s not waste any moments we can share. I need your scent to cover me so I can remember you long after you’re gone.”
He wasn’t rough in his actions, but he was as hungry as I was. The last day had been a whirlwind, the sweet experiences something I would store in my memory banks. Hopefully, they would make the long nights a little easier.
His touch was just as incredible as always, but there was also a sadness to the way he brushed his fingertips along my skin. As he rolled his fingers down my spine, slowly shifting them between my legs, I uttered a single, soft moan.
“My kitten purrs. I love hearing that.” He blew across my cheek and rolled the tip of his index finger around my clit.
“I told you. I only roar.”
“You do that as well.” Havros bit down on my shoulder as he fingered my pussy with his thumb. The sensations were incredible, the crackle of electricity entirely different. I felt the jolts all the way to my bones.
A single tear slipped past my lashes as he plunged two fingers inside my tight channel. I was amazed how incredible his actions felt, rough yet tender all at the same time. My breathing had become labored, my core overheating.
He knew exactly how to drive me crazy in the most controlled manner. I planted both hands on the glass, even digging in my nails, longing to scratch the surface as another reminder I was here.
My mouth was dry, but my pussy was soaking wet, already throbbing from his rough touch. I closed my eyes as he drove two more fingers inside, now using his thumb to tease my tender bud.
“So wet for me. So damn hot. You’re on fire, baby.”
He was right. I could barely breathe, the intense yearning as strong as it had ever been. I bucked hard against his hand, goosebumps appearing down my arms.
As he reached around, cupping my breast, I threw back my head. “So bad,” I managed.
His chuckle was dark and sexy, the sound reverberating in my ears. “I think you hunger for my cock.”
“Oh, God, yes. Fuck me. Just fuck me.”
He rubbed his groin across my bottom as he pinched my nipple. The pain only added to the sheer excitement and the vibrant need to have him seated deep inside.
He took a few seconds to continue teasing me, even driving his juice-soaked fingers into his mouth. The glimmer of sun was unable to hide the sinful act and I bit my lower lip just to keep from crying out. I pushed backwards, the invitation as blatant as I could manage.
“Yes, my kitten is very hungry. Have you been a good girl?”
“Always.”
“You’re such a bad liar.” He nipped my ear and I felt the tip of his cock pressed against my entrance. Before thrusting the entire length inside, he cracked his hand against my bottom several times. The disciplinary move only added to the intimate moment, the heated passion that had forever been burned into my mind.
He was as famished as I was, the taunting now off the table as the ruthless man lost all patience. I was pulled into a sweet vacuum as soon as he plunged his shaft deep inside.
My muscles responded instantly, clamping around the huge invasion. I kept my eyes cinched closed, falling into the bliss even more. So many emotions raced through me, so many things to say entering my mind.
But I was stuck in a fog, unable to think or breathe. The moment he pulled out, I whimpered, clawing the glass.
Every sound he made was guttural, a telling of his needs. They were much stronger than before and when he drove into me again, the force pushed me against the glass. The tremendous sensations added to the fireworks going off in my body.
Together we were as one, an unlikely pairing that had allowed us to taste the fantasy everyone craved.
If only for a little while.
With every thrust, I was pushed closer and closer to pure ecstasy. A climax refused to be denied, my body nothing more than a toy for him to manipulate. The thought was delicious and filthy, pushing me even closer.
“Oh. Oh. Oh. Yes.” My laugh skittered, my breathless words barely audible.
His strokes became brutal and he clasped his hands over mine, twining our fingers together as he pressed his face into my neck. With every nip, every drag of his rough tongue, I fell harder and deeper. That wasn’t allowed to happen. I couldn’t do this. I just… couldn’t.
As soon as I rose onto my toes, a climax rushed in, the tingling vibrations turning into a powerful wave.
“Oh!” My cry was ragged, strained as I did my best to hold back. That was almost impossible around a man like Havros. He’d awakened my own beast, allowing me to face the darkness in a way that could never be forgotten.
He continued pumping, driving me from one orgasm into another. My pulse echoed in my ears, my legs shaking. I dug my nails into his hands, the wild storm turning into a cataclysm.
While he continued pumping, I sensed his body was tense, his needs no longer able to be shoved aside. I opened my eyes, staring at his face as I squeezed my muscles.
“My beautiful kitten. Always. Remember us always.”
His body jerked and within seconds, I felt the sweet release of his hot cum as he erupted deep inside.
Memories would help with the darkness.
But what could I do with my aching heart?