Chapter
Four
Soren
What the hell was wrong with me? You would think I had never talked to a woman in my life. And yeah, it’d been a solid eight years since I’ve been on a date, but hell. I ran a hand down my face as I listened to Lane talk while he loaded up his UTV on his trailer.
I certainly wasn’t in the market to date, but I wanted to think I still had a little game. Lane would say I suffered from “awkward as hell-ness” for the last few years, and on this one count, I might have to say the bonehead was right. That awkwardness may or may not have made me act like a complete jackass when I was unsure of what was going on. It wasn’t every day you walked up from feeding cattle and there was a beautiful stranger sitting on your porch steps. At least not out here in the middle of rural Kansas. Well, there was that one time that made today feel like déjà vu, but I couldn’t dredge into the past right now. I’d leave the women to Lane. The last time a woman sat on my porch in exactly the same way, my life was blasted to pieces. She had dropped a bomb that initiated the second hardest day of my life. Deep breath. I needed to focus, but this woman was entirely too attractive. I needed to help her find this child so she could be on her way, and I could go back to my purposefully female-free life. I was pretty sure I’d scared the hell out of her earlier, and I wanted to go back to square one and not act like an asshole. Something about her told me she was used to assholery, and I didn’t want to be another jerk she had to deal with. I saw her fingers tapping like I’d seen Jonah do on more than one occasion. I knew I’d screwed up and my gut sank at the thought that I had caused that reaction. I was a safe person, but because of the way I’d acted, she didn’t know that. Something about her threw me off-kilter and instead of pausing as I knew to do, I reacted. I made the decision that I’d try to do better. Today was a rough day, but that wasn’t her fault. Abruptly, a knock sounded on the door. I walked toward the entrance with Sawyer in tow. Her faint delicate perfume that smelled of strawberries and cream wafting toward me at her nearness. A woman stood on the other side of the door and lit up like a Christmas tree when her eyes landed on Sawyer.
“Hey, darlin’.” She made an exaggerated sad face, her bubblegum pink lips turning down as she pulled Sawyer into a fierce embrace. She rocked Sawyer from side to side in an exaggerated hug. Everything about this woman screamed loud. Extra loud. Neon loud.
Sawyer made introductions, and I shut the door once Talia was inside.
I’d never seen a more opposite coupling of friends. Her friend was at least five foot eleven, with black, curly hair and brown eyes that danced with amusement. She was larger than life with her neon pink blouse, black leather skinny jeans, and sunshine yellow hoop earrings and matching shoes. Her nails were painted the same color as her lips. Everything about her screamed loud and bold, while everything about Sawyer whispered quiet and soft.
Sawyer turned around, and a wetness covered her pale blue eyes. I scrubbed a hand across my sternum. I hated tears; I never knew what to say. Thankfully, she took the bag off of Talia’s shoulder and quietly padded to the bathroom to change. Talia sashayed deeper into the family room and narrowed her eyes as she gave me a once over. She didn’t hide the fact she was sizing me up. Her gaze made me think of my days in Coach Walder’s class in school. Coach Walder had a reputation of being able to scare the devil straight out of you. Lane was still terrified of her. I’d witnessed all six feet three inches of the man duck under a booth table at Ronnie’s Diner to avoid her. Talia had the appearance of friendliness, but there was no mistaking her protectiveness toward Sawyer.
“You live here?” Talia clarified as she waved one brightly painted nail in a circular pattern. She walked around the family room, scrutinizing an item here and there. She was one of those people that naturally walked into a place with self-possession, as though they owned it. It wasn’t pretentious or haughty, but more of a self-assurance she carried. The more I observed her, the more I realized she and Lane would have a lot in common.
“Yes.”
“Hmmm . . . ” she hummed as she surveyed a photo of me and my best friends, Jonah and Lane, who were more my brothers than friends. We’d known each other since elementary school and played football and baseball together.
“Single?” She raised a brow at me, clearly prepared for an inquisition.
“Uhhh yeah.” I wasn’t a man that blushed, but her directness caused my neck to heat.
“Sawyer is a single Pringle too.”
Her bluntness caused me to chuckle. In what world was someone like Sawyer walking around single? I ran my hand down my five o’clock shadow. Talia lightly ran a finger along the back of a hand-carved wooden horse on my mantel.
“Have you ever met someone who is too good for this world?”
As soon as she spoke the words, his face filled my mind. My throat was dry. My stomach tightened. There was no way she knew. She was only asking a question. I released a pent up breath.
“Yes, I have.”
My throat tightened and my voice sounded hoarse to my own ears. She turned and stared me directly in the eyes.
“That’s Sawyer.”
“What’s Sawyer?”
I heard the soft voice to my left. Sawyer had changed into light wash denim jeans, a thick cream sweater, and sable cowgirl boots pulled up over her jeans. A jacket was folded over her arm. She was breathtakingly beautiful. But the thing that stopped my breath was the wavy, hip-length hair the color of wheat harvested in summer flowing over her shoulders. She was more relaxed, and the color of her hair brought out the freckles that dusted her nose and upper cheeks. Her eyes were a striking blend of light blues that resembled shattered sea glass. They were eyes that stopped men cold in their tracks. Eyes that haunted you long after you caught a glimpse of them.
“Only that you’re the best friend a gal could ask for,” Talia replied cheekily, winking at me as she added, “Let me braid your hair.”
Instead of torturing myself thinking about running my fingers through her hair, I texted Lane and Jonah and got an ETA. Within a couple of minutes, Sawyer’s hair was in a thick braid down her back, with a few soft wisps that had escaped brushing her cheeks. I had to keep myself busy so I didn’t gawk like a high schooler while Talia expertly twisted the golden mass of waves into order. If there was anything I knew, it was that Sawyer was without a doubt the most beautiful woman I’d ever laid eyes on. I also knew it had been over eight years since I’d made that gamble, and I didn’t plan on rolling the dice any time soon.
Ten minutes later, we had a crew of about thirty people ready to search for Connor. After a tight hug from Sawyer, Talia left to pick up her daughter. Lane and Jonah brought their UTVs, along with five local farmers. Travis headed to do all the evening chores of feeding cattle, which had to be done regardless of the crisis at hand. Gene began feeding after he’d made it back from town, but, between checking all the pastures, it was a two man job. Particularly because I had stopped partway through chores earlier when I found Sawyer.
Everyone gathered around my front porch steps, Sawyer and Fulton standing partway down the stairs on either side of me. I gave directives of areas we had already covered. The locals nodded, being almost as familiar with the area as I was. Many of them were lifelong residents who had been here for three or four generations. This part of Kansas had a heavy population of German and Irish settlers who had traveled to the area in hopes of worthwhile farming. Many of those farms were still in operation, having been passed down through generations. Some of the older generations still spoke German in addition to English, which caused their English to have a slight Germanic accent.
After assigning areas to search, Fulton set forth a plan to make contact again in two hours if we hadn’t found Connor by then. Additional law enforcement agencies would be called in, along with search and rescue dogs. Two officers would continue to patrol sections of land, searching for clues and questioning locals to see if anyone had spotted Connor walking down the road.
I turned to Sawyer at my side and quietly asked, “Anything you want to add?” Her shattered blue eyes met mine, and she gave a small nod.
Once Fulton was done giving instructions, I cut in. “This is Sawyer.” I nodded to her. “She knows Connor.”
“Hi. I just wanted to add that I really appreciate you coming out to help. Connor is truly a sweet kid, but he’s just dealing with some disappointment right now. Also, to reiterate, he’s wearing a light blue sweater and khaki dress pants.” She expelled a deep breath, turned toward me, and inclined her head.
“All right. Everyone follow me and Fulton, and we’ll split up at the marker,” I called out, turning to Sawyer.
“You’re with me.”
I wasn’t about to let anyone spend time in her light. Call me selfish, but I wanted her warmth all to myself. There was something about her I couldn’t put my finger on, but I didn’t have time to wonder. A lost little boy needed to be found, and the temperature drop tonight was becoming more concerning. A small child couldn’t survive in twenty-nine degree weather without a jacket, without the risk of injury or more. As we neared the UTV, I gave her back my hoodie in case she needed it. Her brows met.
“In case you get cold, or we need it for Connor.”
Because I want my hoodie on you. What was wrong with me? I had barely met this woman and she was already under my skin. I didn’t have time for a relationship, and my last not-relationship had nearly cost me everything. The entire town was witness to that destruction, and I blamed myself for my parents leaving soon after that. They had expressed a desire to retire from farming and travel the country in their RV. Although, sometimes I wondered if it was to keep their distance from me and my ruin. Sure, they loved me and encouraged me from a distance, but all I had ever done was cause them grief and shame. I couldn’t blame anyone for keeping their distance, because I devastated the things I loved. How could I pursue a woman if it always ended in ruin?