Chapter
Thirty-Eight
Sawyer
Soren:
Just a heads-up, my parents ambushed me this morning to “help” with wheat harvest. I wanted you to know before you arrived.
Sawyer:
Ambushed? Hmmm should I be worried?
Soren:
No, they’ll treat you like an angel. I, on the other hand, am preparing myself to be embarrassed no less than twenty-three times today.
Sawyer:
Ohhhhh. Embarrassed Soren. I can’t wait to see! * insert evil cackle *
Soren:
* Squinting side eye gif*
After nearly two hours in the combine with Soren harvesting wheat, we had finished the fields we were working on, but I hadn’t met his parents yet. I saw their RV parked in Soren’s drive when I arrived, but they had met up with friends for lunch. Travis has been a dutiful cart driver. When the combine bin was full of wheat, we’d stop and offload into a cart pulled by a large green tractor with a cab. Gene drove a semitruck to the grain elevator to unload the last of the wheat harvested. Soren has been patient, teaching me all the names of things and how everything worked. It was one of those things I’d never really considered, but once he explained how the combine worked, I was immediately interested in the whole process. It might have helped that my instructor had heart-stopping dark hazel eyes with tiny crinkles at the corners that made me want to brush my lips across them.
“Sawyer?”
I had completely missed him speaking because I was too busy lusting after his attractive . . . eye crinkles. I was such a weirdo. His eye crinkles were now on full display as he looked at me with amusement. His lips tugged at the corner trying to suppress a smile.
“Sorry, what?” I needed help against my attraction to this man.
“Do you want to drive home?” He asked as he gestured to the steering wheel.
“Really?!” He grinned at me.
The tires on the combine were taller than my head when I stood beside them. I had never driven anything this big.
“Yes?” I said, nerves kicking in.“But I don’t know how . . . ” I glanced at all the buttons and screens.
“If you want, you can sit on my leg. That way if something goes wrong, I’ll be right here. I’ll handle the gears so all you have to focus on is steering?”
I was nervous, but far too excited about the opportunity to pass it up.
“Okay.” I stood up from the small seat to his left that he’d called a “buddy seat,” and he scooted back and slapped his left leg.
“Sit here and I’ll run everything except the steering wheel.”
I timidly sat down, and the warmth of his firm thigh bled through the jeans I was wearing. My right elbow grazed his abs under his shirt. Sitting this way, I was much closer to his face and height. When I turned to look at him, his face was right there. His five o’clock shadow made his eyes appear more consumingly vivid. The warmth of his breath on my cheek sent tingles down my spine. If this were any other person, I would be nervous at his proximity, but Soren Roberts always made me feel safe. In this position, my head could lay on his shoulder, and I impulsively wrapped my arms around his torso. His large hands wrapped around me, and all I could smell was fresh sunshine and spearmint. He was warm and firm, and my knees hit his other thigh as he held me close.
Turning my face to his neck, I whispered, “Thank you for today.” Thank you for making me feel safe was what I wanted to say, but my throat was tight.
He pulled me in tighter and all I wanted to do was kiss his neck . . . and so I did. My lips brushed the underside of his jaw where his five o’clock shadow was coming in, and it was sandpaper against the delicate skin of my lips. He stopped breathing and pulled his head back to look at me. His hazel eyes searched mine, and I could see every single one of his individual eyelashes. Something told me he wanted to kiss me, while at the same time, I felt a sense of apprehension telling me to back away. Tugging equally as much was the desire to lean forward and press my lips to his. I wanted Soren to kiss me, but I immediately realized I’d never kissed anyone of my own volition, and I wasn’t sure I’d be any good at it. There was a part of me that wanted to be exceptional at kissing if I ever had the opportunity to be kissed by Soren Roberts. His eyes briefly dropped to my lips before bouncing back up to my eyes, but he didn’t move. He was waiting on me, and I was paralyzed like I was partially buried in sand. I wanted this, but I didn’t want to screw it up. I unwrapped my arms around him and pulled back. All of my inexperienced adult thoughts rushed in yet again. He looked at me as though he was working to understand me, but I didn’t understand myself either. I didn’t know exactly why I pulled away, but I had, and there wasn’t anything I could do now. He sat back, and his hands gripped the armrests of his seat a little too tightly. I swung my knees toward the steering wheel, and he reached for my hands and placed them where they needed to be. The rough texture of his calloused hands sent fire through my body at the touch. As he leaned back, he brushed his lips against my temple and I felt it all the way to my toes. I should have kissed him. If his forehead and temple kisses had this effect on me, what would kissing him be like? My cheeks burned thinking about it, and I wanted to sink into the floor.
“Sawyer?”
I shyly met his eyes as we sat, still parked.
“Is it okay with you that I kiss your forehead? I shouldn’t have assumed. I should have asked the other day.” His eyes searched mine.
I nodded, my cheeks fully ablaze now.
“I need your words.” His voice was gravel.
“I like it.” My voice was unnaturally high, and I bit the inside of my cheek.
He must have found what he was looking for because a soft smile tugged at his mouth and he ran a knuckle down my cheek before he pushed a handle and the combine began moving. I was left wondering if having a man ask if he can kiss me was my weakness.