The Marriage Policy (The Jilted Exes’ Club #2)

Prologue

Donovan

Fourteen years old

I wake up in the morning with my body betraying me. I ache all over, my joints an uncomfortable combination of pain, burning, and throbbing.

Of course I’d have a flare-up of my JIA today. Sometimes I think juvenile idiopathic arthritis wants to ruin my life. Not that I have much of a life, and while some of that can be blamed on my JIA, it doesn’t take all the credit.

I’m…well, not the most popular, or the coolest, or a million other things. If it wasn’t for my best friend Eric, I’m not sure I would have a life outside of my parents.

I don’t understand why he puts up with me, why he likes to spend time with me, when I’m…me. The nerdy guy who’s too small for his age, whom everyone told he’s gay before he ever had the chance to work it out himself—not that I’ve verbalized it out loud to anyone yet, not even to Eric.

He’s the polar opposite of me in every way—outgoing, liked by everyone, athletic—and yet, he chooses me. He’s always by my side, always got my back, even on days like today when I’ll have to let him down because I can’t go out.

On his fifteenth birthday.

Go me.

Greatest Best Friend Ever award goes to…

I know I should try to do some of my stretches, try to work on the things I learn in physical therapy, but sometimes I just don’t have the energy.

I’m so tired of dealing with this. It’s not fair that I have so many things to deal with.

Not only my illness, but missing out on typical kid stuff, and my family’s struggles, and oh, let’s not forget because it bears repeating, being a huge nerd.

We keep a small fridge by my bed, and I wince as I reach over, grab some water, and take my medication. My body screams at me, and I know it will be even worse when I have to get up in a little while to go to the bathroom.

My parents are at work. They have to work so hard to make ends meet, and sometimes even that isn’t enough.

Especially because of my medical bills. They don’t know that I hear them talking sometimes, worrying about costs, complaining about how bad our coverage is, wondering how they’ll make it all work.

My eyes pool with tears at the thought, but I swat them away, then take my time, forcing myself to sit on the edge of the bed, while my hips, knees, ankles, and feet feel like someone is trying to rip them from my body.

I ignore the walker because it makes me sad to use it, and I shuffle slowly to the bathroom. It takes everything in me to make it there, pee, wash my hands, and get back to bed, and when I slump there, I feel like I just ran twenty miles.

I wince when my phone rings, knowing without looking that it’s Eric.

Part of me wants to ignore it, but I know him.

If I don’t answer, he’ll keep calling or show up, and I don’t want to ruin his birthday even more.

But then, maybe it’s better that I won’t be there.

It’s always awkward when I’m around Eric’s other friends.

There’s no doubt in my mind they all wonder why he likes me.

Why he insists on bringing me to everything they do.

“Happy birthday!” I say into the phone, trying not to sound like I’m in as much pain as I’m in. Sometimes it’s debilitating, and I just lie around and cry.

“What’s wrong?” Eric asks, and my heart drops.

“What? Nothing. I’m fine!” I’m not sure how I plan to play that off, considering I’m about to tell him I can’t come over for his birthday. Sometimes it’s a pain in the butt to have someone who knows me so well.

“Are you sure? You sound off.”

“I said I’m fine,” I snap, then immediately feel guilty. He just wants to help, and he does, but sometimes I feel helpless, and that sucks. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not.”

“What time do you want my mom to come get you?” He lives only a few blocks away, and while exercise is good for me, he doesn’t want me to have to walk and then be at his party all day. Depending on how I’m doing, my body can get achy easily. “I want you to get here before everyone else.”

Guilt covers me like a too heavy blanket during a heat wave.

“I, um…I won’t be able to come to your party. I can hardly move today.” And I don’t like people to see me when I feel this way. Outside my family and medical team, it’s mostly only Eric or his mom who have.

“Oh. It’s okay, D. Maybe I can cancel my party and come there instead. We can—”

“What? No. God no. You’re not canceling your birthday party just because I can’t go.”

“But it won’t be as fun without you,” he whines, and as silly as that sounds, it’s so Eric.

I can’t help but smile…and feel so lucky. Everyone should have an Eric. I still don’t know why I got blessed enough to have one. “I’m so glad you think I’m infinitely cooler than I am.”

“But—”

“It’s not fair to everyone else. They made plans and bought gifts, and think about all the supplies your mom got.”

He sighs, and I know I have him.

“Fine, but I’m coming over right after. I can sleep over.”

“You don’t have to. We’re having a sleepover next weekend for my birthday.” It’s wild but our birthdays are only a week apart.

“I know I don’t have to, but I want to.”

“I’m not gonna be much fun.”

“You’re always fun, D.”

I roll my eyes. “Liar.”

“I’ll see you soon, okay?” he says, and emotion clogs up my chest.

“Okay. Bye.” I end the call before he can tell I’m upset.

I don’t want to miss his party. I don’t want to miss half the things I have to miss. I just want to be normal.

I curl onto my side and do my best not to cry.

Eventually, I fall asleep, then wake up and have nothing to do and end up going back to sleep again. Both my parents call to check on me. I pretend I’m not so…sad. Sad that I’m a burden on my family and on Eric.

I don’t know what time it is when there’s a knock on my door, and then it slowly pushes open.

“D? You awake?” I smile at the sound of Eric’s voice.

“Yeah.” I smell cheese and tomatoes before I see the pizza box in his hands.

“Double pepperoni and sausage, just how you like it.”

He knows I didn’t eat much today. We keep small things in my mini fridge, but I didn’t have much of an appetite.

My stomach growls in response.

“Holy shit. I heard that all the way over here.” He laughs, closes the door behind him, then sits on my bed. His floppy blond hair bounces when he does. Eric’s taller than me, more muscular too, with fair, white skin and bright blue eyes. “How are you feeling?”

When I try to sit up, he attempts to help, but I shake it off. “I can do it myself. I need to do it myself.”

“Okay. Sure, D,” he replies, and pretends not to pay attention to how long it takes to maneuver myself so I’m sitting with my back against the headboard.

While I’m doing that, he grabs two slices from the box and puts them on a paper plate for me before grabbing two for himself. Then he gets Cokes out of the fridge.

“How was the party?”

“Eh. It was all right. Wanna watch a movie?”

“Don’t do that. I don’t want you to stop yourself from telling me about your day because you don’t want me to feel sad. I hate that. I don’t want to be pitied.” My gaze darts away, my voice full of vulnerability.

“Okay. It was really fun. We played a lot of games, and I brought you cake too. It’s in the kitchen. You’ll never guess what happened.”

“What?” I ask, taking a bite of my food.

“So, Crystal told me Misty has a crush on me. I told her I like Misty too. We’re gonna start hanging out. I don’t really know what that means, but I’m assuming it’ll be fun.”

A pang of longing hits me in the chest. Not for Eric, because I really don’t see him like that.

That’s all I need, to fall in love with my straight best friend.

That would be one more thing to make my life miserable.

But I do want that —for Eric to be able to come to me and tell me a boy likes me, and for me to say I like him too, and that easily, we’re hanging out .

He’s going to have a hundred of these experiences before I even have one.

“What do you think of Crystal?” Eric asks, pulling me from my thoughts.

“Huh?” Why the hell does he want to know that?

“Crystal? Do you like her?” His blue eyes penetrate me.

“I’ve probably spoken two words to her my whole life, and if she’s spoken any to me, it’s likely, hey, aren’t you that nerdy guy who’s friends with Eric Markham ?”

He shakes his head. “You’re not a nerd.”

He’s the only one who doesn’t think so, but I don’t tell him that. “Why do you ask?” Though I have a feeling I know.

“Because I was thinking maybe you and Crystal could get to know each other too. Then all four of us could hang out. It’s about time we got our first girlfriends.”

The ache in my chest grows. This is going to be another way Eric and I are different, another something that could pull us apart. One day, the differences might be too many and I’ll lose him.

But like earlier, with my pain, I’m so tired . Tired of holding it in, tired of keeping this secret, so without looking at him, I say, “I’ll never like Crystal.”

I feel Eric’s frown. “How do you know? She’s really nice. She’s—”

“A girl,” I cut him off. “I’ll never like her because she’s a girl.”

The room is silent except for the pounding of my heart that I fear is so loud, Eric might hear it too.

Is this it? Is this the moment I lose my best friend? I swear it feels like ten hours pass before I finally don’t have it in me not to look at him, but when I do, Eric’s head is facing downward, his eyes avoiding mine.

“I’m sorry.” I never should have told him. He would have rather not known.

His head shoots up at that. “What? Why are you sorry? I’m sorry.”

“What reason do you have to be sorry?” That makes no sense. “You’re sorry I like boys?”

His pupils expand. “No! I’m sorry I didn’t know?” He says it like a question, and I can’t help but chuckle.

“Again, not your fault. I’m the one who didn’t tell you.”

“Did you think you couldn’t? That I would care? Because I think that’s why I’m apologizing.”

Such an Eric response—sweet and earnest.

“It’s not you. It’s just…another way I’m different. And I didn’t want you to be uncomfortable or like, think I’m perving on you. Because I’m not. I wouldn’t ever do that.”

His nose wrinkles up slightly. “Okay. Good. Not good because there’s something wrong with liking boys or as if I would be upset if you like me, just…

good that we feel the same about each other.

That we’re best friends. We’re still best friends, right?

” Eric asks as if he’s not the prize out of our duo. He never sees how incredible he is.

“As long as you want me, we’ll always be best friends.”

He grins. “Then we’ll always be best friends.” He moves over and sits with his back against the headboard too. Our arms touch, and like always, his warmth comforts me. “Are there any boys you like? Because I can hook you up.”

I shake my head and can’t help but chuckle. “Yeah, I don’t think that’ll happen until I’m older and get out of here.” We live in the high desert of Southern California, and I don’t know any other gay kids my age.

“Where are we gonna go?” he asks, then takes a bite of pizza.

“LA,” I play along. I’m sure we won’t really move away together, but it’s a nice dream. “I’ll be in remission, of course, and the boys…there will be so many boys…” I sigh.

“And girls for me!” he adds, and it’s so perfect. This moment is perfect, the way he’s treating this like it’s nothing, like he doesn’t care.

“Thank you,” I tell him. “I feel like our friendship is lopsided. You do everything for me and—”

“You help me with school. No way I’d pass math without you…or English, or history…” Eric shrugs. “Plus, I don’t do anything special for you other than be your friend, just like you’re mine.”

In that moment, I silently promise myself that I’ll do everything in my power not to lose this, never ever lose him. I won’t get feelings for him that he can’t return, and I’ll do anything he needs, help him in any way I can, the way Eric has always done for me.