32 Lisette
August, 1942 – Paris
Lisette crossed the street and headed to the café. She hadn’t liked lying to Christoph, but what else could she do? She’d seen his face fall and knew what was crossing his mind. The farmer’s wife’s warning circled her thoughts. The feelings he’d unleashed in her were dangerous.
The café was busy but she managed to find a table by the window.
‘What are you looking so earnest about?’ Seraphin said when he arrived.
‘Nothing,’ she said, forcing a smile. She couldn’t tell him the thoughts that swirled inside her.
He kissed her on each cheek. She slipped the vial into his pocket as they embraced.
‘What happened with the train?’ she asked in a low voice.
They sat close together so they could whisper. The café was so crowded the noise drowned out their words.
‘We blew up the tracks; the train never made it to Koln. It’s lying on its side in a French field.’
‘That’s good,’ Lisette said. ‘One less train to feed the German troops.’
‘How did you get on with your Boche? I hope the trip to Normandy hasn’t turned you into a double agent?’ He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear with a teasing smile.
‘Of course not,’ she said. ‘I’d never betray my own country.’
‘I know you wouldn’t.’ Seraphin patted her hand and moved his chair closer. ‘But perhaps you are a double agent of the heart?’
He was so near the truth that she panicked. Did it show in her face?
Seraphin smiled. ‘A crazy idea, ne’est-ce pas ? Besides, I know you’re sans c?ur , that’s why you’re perfect for this job.’
She smiled. How wrong he was. But she was trying to fight her feelings.
‘Did you hear what happened to Marie?’ Lisette said.
Seraphin nodded and stirred his coffee, a solemn look on his face. ‘She didn’t make it. And we almost lost you too.’ He cupped her cheek. ‘Every time I see Estelle and say goodnight, I think how I’d feel if my daughter was an agent in the field. You’re doing something very brave, Lisette. I’m proud of you.’
Lisette nodded, warmed by his affirmation. But she couldn’t help thinking of the others. Hélène. Marie. Twice now, others had perished while Lisette had escaped. The guilt was unbearable. Even more reason to shut Christoph out of her heart.
‘I want to do more,’ she said, her jaw tight. Something to atone for the sin of falling for Christoph.
‘Oh, you will.’ He leaned in. ‘Did Leutnant Baumann tell you that an important visitor is coming from Berlin?’
‘Yes, I was going to tell you. General Winkler. Christoph said there’s going to be a dinner. But how do you know this?’
‘You’re not my only agent, Lisette. General Winkler is Head of the Production and Supplies Division. Most of the food that gets shipped out from France is heading east to the troops in Russia. He’s come to talk about stepping up production for a last push. But you’re going to disrupt their plans.’
‘I don’t understand.’
Seraphin put his arm around her shoulder, leaning his head closer to conceal what he was saying.
‘At the lavish dinner at Le Meurice,’ he whispered, ‘you’ll make one of the courses. The vial will be the secret ingredient.’
‘What’s in it?’
‘Poison,’ Seraphin whispered. ‘It’s too dangerous to leave at the hotel. But I’ll find a way to return it to you when the time is right. Pour it into the mixture. That’s all you need to do. By the time they’re choking on their own vomit, you’ll have fled.’
‘It will kill them,’ Lisette murmured.
‘What’s in that vial is deadly stuff.’ Seraphin said. ‘All that canoodling with your German suitor will have paid off when he feels his throat tighten and the air deplete in his lungs.’
Lisette blinked, taking in his words. ‘But …’
Christoph’s death on her hands. She could never harm him. Unexpectedly, he’d crept into her empty heart. Yet that is exactly what Seraphin was asking of her.
‘This is for you,’ Seraphin said.
He slid a pair of keys across the table, each with a brown label fastened to it. Written on the labels was Apartment 14 .
‘The apartment is on rue Pastourelle,’ Seraphin continued. ‘A safe place to go after the dinner until we can fly you out of France. There’s a spare, in case. Don’t worry, no one uses the place, and if you take food for the concierge, he’ll turn a blind eye.’ He smiled. ‘In one fell swoop, you’ll kill the whole dining room full of Germans.’
‘Why not target General Winkler?’ Lisette’s mind scrabbled for alternatives. ‘Your plan is too risky.’
‘Don’t tell me you’re getting faint-hearted. You could get the Légion d’Honneur for this.’ Seraphin’s face was etched with urgency. He gripped her hand. ‘You owe it to Marie and Hélène. Not to mention Johnny and your grandparents. Oh yes, I know the SOE said hatred was your weakness, but now’s your chance to turn it into a strength.’
The next day, Lisette rose early and washed her face. She hadn’t slept well. Her orders were to carry out Seraphin’s plan and leave France, but how could she do it without risking Christoph’s life?
She got dressed for her morning shift, shivering in the cool air. In five days, she’d have to leave France and never see Christoph again, and he may very well be dead by then, though she’d do everything to try and avoid it. That same recklessness she’d felt at the farm returned. If she was never going to see Christoph again, what harm would it do to act on her emotions? To give in and let him love her. Lisette glanced in the mirror and touched her cheek. Even the thought of it made her burn.
She’d just finished dressing when there was a tap at the door. The Kommandant stood in the corridor, filling every corner of the narrow space.
‘Aren’t you going to invite me in?’ he said.
Lisette stood back and let him pass. What was he doing here? He filled the room like a thick, grey fog. He took off his gloves and laid them on the bedside table.
‘So, I hear there was an irregular occurrence while I was away.’ He raised his eyebrows. ‘An unauthorized companion went with Leutnant Baumann to the farm. I know it was you. I’ve spoken to the head chef.’
‘I’m sorry, Herr Kommandant. Leutnant Baumann asked me if I wanted to see the countryside.’
The Kommandant rubbed his chin. ‘The countryside, eh? It seems he got caught up in a search of the farmhouse. You can tell me. I’ve read the reports.’
‘Leutnant Baumann cleared up the problem, I believe.’
The Kommandant smiled. ‘A knight in shining armour. I can imagine how his chivalry touched your heart. But you see, they never did catch that other person. It would have been better if Leutenant Baumann had let them search the farm, don’t you think?’
Lisette steadied her breathing. ‘It wasn’t up to me, Herr Kommandant,’ she said.
‘And yet you didn’t reveal yourself to the soldiers. Nobody mentioned you in the report, which struck me as strange.’
Did he know about her involvement in the drop? Or was there something else he wanted?
He went to the window and undid the catch. ‘Such an interesting view. Come over here and see.’
She hesitated. The Kommandant held out his hand and ushered her into the space before him. She stared at the Louvre and the Tuilleries. He stroked her hair.
‘Since reading the report, I’ve been intrigued. What is it about Leutnant Baumann that has beguiled you? He’s such an ordinary fellow.’ His breath trespassed on her skin. ‘I’d look after you much better than he does.’
He bent down and kissed her neck.
Lisette ducked out of his grasp. ‘You’re mistaken about Leutnant Baumann and me, Herr Kommandant. I had a fiancé, you see, and I’m loyal to his memory.’
The Kommandant smiled. ‘I admire loyalty, up to a point. But sometimes it’s better for one’s own survival to be a little disloyal. Don’t worry, I won’t give up on you. My wife and son are departing soon for Germany. I’ll need some company then.’
He bowed, and left her, closing the door behind him.
The room felt different. It smelled of his cologne, his arrogance. Her skin had been stained by his lips. She wanted to bathe in scalding water and rid herself of his scent.
She stood by the window and let the breeze blow over her. She hated him. She didn’t care if he died at the dinner. But Christoph had to live. Somehow, she’d ensure he didn’t eat the poisoned food. Lisette was determined to take whatever goodness she could find in the war and, for these last few days in Paris, make it her own.
That night, after her shift ended, Christoph was waiting outside her room.
‘I need to speak to you,’ he said, his face serious.
Lisette closed the window, pulled the black-out curtains and switched on the lamp on her chest of drawers. It was strange having him this close, knowing that it was only a matter of days before she’d never see him again.
‘I’m glad to see you,’ she said. ‘I’m sorry we couldn’t spend yesterday together.’
She reached out to take his hand, but he moved away.
‘You didn’t look sorry,’ he said.
‘What do you mean?’
‘I saw you in the café. With that man. You said you were meeting a friend. It certainly looked friendly.’ His face was pained and angry. ‘If you wanted me out of the picture, why not say so? There was no need to lie.’
Lisette didn’t know what to say. She’d lied to him, but not in the way he imagined.
‘Oh, Christoph, it wasn’t like that. You could’ve come into the café. Seen for yourself.’
Doubt showed in his face.
‘What do you mean?’ he said.
‘I was meeting a friend.’ Her mind worked quickly. ‘Marcel was my fiancé’s best friend. They grew up together. In fact, it was Marcel who introduced us, because my fiancé was too shy. I like to meet him from time to time. He knows stories from when they were little. It comforts me to hear them.’
How easily the lies came, but that was what she’d trained for.
Christoph bit his lip, digesting what she’d said. ‘He’s not your lover, then?’
Lisette took his hand. This time he didn’t pull away.
‘He’s not, I promise. Never has been and never will be.’ At least that part was true.
Christoph let out a huge sigh.
‘Oh, Sylvie,’ he said, clasping her hands, ‘I’m sorry. At times, you seem distant. I thought the worst. I’m so ashamed.’
Lisette cupped his cheek with her hand. A fierce desire to protect him burned inside her.
‘Whatever happens,’ she whispered, ‘finding you has been an unexpected gift.’ She swallowed, determined to get the words out. ‘There are a thousand reasons why this shouldn’t happen, but we have to make the most of it.’
‘Do you really mean that?’
Lisette nodded. She’d still do her duty. But why not take this gift while she had the chance? She pulled him close and ran her fingers through his hair. He responded urgently, his lips merging with hers. The room dimmed. The kiss cleansed everything – the lies, Seraphin’s plan, the Kommandant.
Christoph pulled away, his eyes shining. ‘Then let’s –’ He stopped mid-sentence.
He stared at the bedside table. ‘What are those?’
Lisette followed his gaze. The Kommandant’s black gloves.
‘Christoph, it’s not what you think,’ she said.
Doubt tumbled back into his eyes. He let go of her. ‘First the man in the café, now my superior.’
Lisette’s arms stiffened. ‘He came here to question me about the farm. You know what the Kommandant is like.’
‘It says a lot that you’re happy for a man like the Kommandant to occupy this room.’
‘Stop it, Christoph,’ she said. ‘How can you be so hateful? That’s not the kind of man I thought you were.’
Christoph didn’t answer. He walked out and slammed the door shut. Lisette cried out in frustration. There were only five days left. Five days before she had to leave him for ever. How could she make him avoid the dinner if he no longer trusted her?