The Passion

Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

FELISHA

“ I can’t believe you had to ask me if I would move into a penthouse apartment in the same building as the quiet, serious, and sexy-as-fuck Mr. Taylor,” Harper comments while sipping on her second glass of champagne, lazing back on the beautiful cream leather sofa of her temporary accommodation. Luckily it came fully furnished, so she just moved straight in, and we are busy planning a bathroom renovation for her actual apartment.

“Be careful which Mr. Taylor you are referring to. We might be friends, but I’m definitely not into sharing.” I laugh for what feels like the first time in a while.

“Oh, you can have Mister Confident. I’m just sitting back admiring the poker-faced brother who looks so deep in thought that I wouldn’t mind having him concentrate that hard on me for a while,” Harper replies over the rim of her champagne flute.

“Back off, girl, we have enough complications in our life. Don’t need any more drama.” I try to look serious, but she knows that I would never interfere in her private life.

“Me? I would never be the problem. You, on the other hand…” She rolls her eyes at me, and that has us both laughing again.

I’m sitting having a Friday-night drink with Harper waiting for Flynn to arrive at Forrest’s apartment. I haven’t seen him in the flesh for over a week, and as much as I thought he would be the problem one, complaining about not seeing each other, instead, I’m the one feeling like I’m going to jump his bones the moment I walk into the apartment and see him.

I have never had an urgent sex drive before, but since Flynn and I were together in Australia and I knew he was mine for the taking, I have learned there is such a thing as desperate for sex. I have enjoyed sex since my late teens, but it was all about the enjoyment of the moment, nothing like the longing I have felt all week. There is so much more to this longing, but tonight, all that I can think about is him taking control and giving me what I want.

“I’m glad Flynn got held up in that meeting. You and I haven’t had much time to just relax and spend time together.” I almost choke on Harper’s words.

“You see me every day, all day. Surely you are sick of me right now. Plus, the extra-long nights we have been putting in this week.” I feel guilty that she has had as little sleep as I have.

“That’s different. There’s nothing fun about wading our way through page after page of financial records.” She screws her face up.

“Exactly, but I couldn’t do it without you,” I say, lifting my glass toward hers. “Love you, sister.”

We clink our glasses together.

“You better.” Harper finds it hard to show too much emotion, and I think it has to do with her father. She changed after he left them, and although I know she loves me and would die for me, it’s not easy for her. She shut herself off from love, and I’m the closest outside her mum and sisters to ever see emotion from her.

Laying my head on the back of the couch, I close my eyes for a moment, just thinking back to what Harper and I have been doing in secret this week. I don’t want anyone to know, and although I don’t think starting a relationship with lies in it is a good idea, I haven’t told Flynn what I’m doing.

The more I thought about my father’s actions on the long flight home from Australia, when my head was a little clearer, I decided there has to be more to all of this than me turning forty. Stepping down as the CEO, although it would be a change and make him lose control, he would have still been involved and have access to everything. But there is something worrying him about me taking over the company that would give me access to all the company records that I currently can’t see. The more I think about it, I think he is panicking about me knowing all his secrets, which makes me suspicious that there are actually bigger secrets than what I have already discovered.

We have been scouring records, and nothing obvious has come up yet, but we have only just begun. With a business our size, I don’t know if I’ll ever find anything or if I’m just jumping to conclusions. My trauma might be making me paranoid, but I’ve learned through my life to trust my gut, and there are red flashing lights and sirens screaming at me right now.

I don’t have access to any of my father’s personal accounts, and he can’t access my information either, and to be fair, what he does with his money is his choice. But what he does with company money, that’s a different story. Sure, I’m manipulating the books to hide a few things from him, but it’s different. Making sure our workers and contractors get paid fairly is a good enough reason to be making payments disguised as something else. I won’t let my father’s stinginess have people suffering, or on the flip side, thinking badly of our company because we treat them poorly. I’ve been doing this for years, and if he hasn’t noticed yet, he never will.

I have a few things that we have flagged to look further into, but that’s next week’s problem. I have spent this last week pushing through jet lag like I’ve never experienced before, and I’m sure I looked like I had dragged myself to work most days. Especially for my father to comment in a meeting, asking if I was unwell because I looked terrible. Did he really care? I doubt it, but it made him look caring in front of others.

My phone vibrating on the table has my heart beating faster as I reach for it, assuming it’s Flynn letting me know he is on his way here.

The name on my screen is not who I expected or the sort of message I want Flynn to ever see.

Fulton: I miss those perfect breasts and the way you taste. When can I see you?

“Fuck.” I drop the phone in my lap, and Harper moves like a flash, grabbing it to see what has me reacting like I did.

“Oh fuck is right.” She throws my phone back at me.

“Ughhh.” I put my glass down on the table with a thud that I’m probably lucky it didn’t shatter in my hand.

“What are you going to do? It’s not like you can say, sorry I’m off the market and don’t need your second-rate cock because I found a younger, hotter model.” Oh yeah, Harper has already had enough alcohol to loosen her filter.

“Harper, God, don’t be so crude.” Thinking about the time I spent with Fulton for a split second, it might not be what I want now, but that doesn’t mean he was second-rate, by any means. “I’ll assure you age had no bearings on his prowess in that department.” I realize now that being so exhausted has the champagne affecting me more than normal too.

If Flynn heard one word that either of us just said, there would be an eruption in this room.

“Christ, why do you always snag the good ones? I’m happy to take him on a rebound.” Harper laughs as she starts refilling her empty glass, but I know I need to stop drinking now.

“What is wrong with you tonight? You would never take someone I had slept with. Why are you sounding so desperate?” Picking up my phone, I glare down at the message again and try to figure out what to reply to Fulton.

Letting out a loud sigh, Harper takes a bigger-than-normal mouthful of her drink and then looks out the window away from me. “Maybe I’m lonely and can see my future unfolding in front of me.” She follows that statement with her second gulp of champagne.

“What are you talking about?” Shit, my mind is going in three different directions, and I’m feeling overwhelmed. Flynn arriving soon, what to reply to Fulton, and now Harper is having a mini vent with me that I’m worried is more than just a rant.

“As soon as this is over, one way or another, you will be riding off into the sunset with your man, and I will still see you, but it won’t be the same. And I’m so happy for you that you have found a man strong enough to stand next to you as your equal, but I just wonder what is in store for me.”

I’m about to reply when my phone buzzes in my hand again, and I’m not sure I’m game enough to look, but I can’t ignore it.

Fulton: My message has you wet thinking about me naked, doesn’t it.

Fulton: I’ll fix that. Tomorrow night 8pm at the Savoy.

Fulton: I’ve been away and made you wait long enough.

Fulton: But I’m back and ready to be attentive to both our needs.

My hands are sweaty, and my blood is pumping faster through my veins, but it’s not from being turned on. A few weeks ago, I would have felt different while I was trying to tell myself I wanted a night with him because there was something growing between us. He has this smoothness about him and the way he likes to be so dominant. But the truth of it was I was just spending time with him trying to forget my ache for Flynn.

“What is he saying?” Harper’s attention has diverted back to me and my buzzing phone. I don’t want to discount her feelings, but I can’t move off the words that keep appearing on my screen.

“He wants to see me tomorrow night.” My words are a bit shaky from my anxiety.

“You mean he wants to fuck you tomorrow night.” She moves closer to me on the couch.

“Yes, that,” I say, putting my head on her shoulder. “How have I got myself into this mess? Well, all of these messes, actually.”

And then I don’t know if it is the alcohol, the mental exhaustion, or my crazy brain at the moment, but I make another choice I’m about to regret, I’m sure.

Felisha: I’ll be there.

And before I have time to unsend the message as I panic, his reply is instant.

Fulton: I’m already hard thinking about seeing you. But as you know, I can be patient.

“You crazy woman, what are you doing?” Harper turns sideways and looks at me intently.

“Playing with fire, and I know I’m going to end up burnt, but I need to be seen with other men. I know I won’t cause too much of a stir in public being with him, because we have been seen out together a few times and the paparazzi have already posted about it online.”

That’s how he knew who I was after that first night in St. Tropez when I gave him the fake name. Even my father saw the photos and was adamant that I stay away from him. Not that I ever listened to my father about who I could see, and I didn’t think it would be a problem because I wasn’t planning on seeing him again. But after the video and my name was out there, I was easy for him to track me down. And although I wasn’t sure about his insistence that we need to see each other again, I fell into the spiderweb of his charm.

“So, I need them to do the same thing tomorrow night and plaster it all over the internet and magazines. I need you to drop one of those anonymous tips to the photographers we like.” Which is a load of crap. Because having our date showing up online is only going to make things with Flynn harder, and I also know as strong as I am, I’m not even close to being safe with Fulton. He has a way with words that persuades me to do things I wouldn’t even think of doing. Not that I would ever do that to Flynn or my own heart. I know who I belong to now, and it’s not Fulton, not even close.

“But you will be calling me thirty minutes after I arrive with some dire emergency that I have to run out of there to save you from.” It’s the only course of action I can think of as to how I can pull this off.

“Yeah, the emergency will be that Flynn is on his way to beat the hell out of him for touching you and then carry you over his shoulder out of there like a caveman.” Harper thinks she is being funny, but she is so close to the truth that I know I’m doing something stupid.

“Fuck my life. Seriously!” I scream out to the room, realizing my frustration.

I’m about to take the bottle off the table and refill my glass for a third time too, but my phone starts ringing this time. I want to ignore it, but I can’t.

“Father.” He never let me drop the formal name. Even though most people call their fathers Dad, it was never an option for me. I think it was all about image and being part of the high class. It makes sense now too. Dad is more an affectionate name for the father you love, where there are no formalities needed.

“Felisha, where are the reports I requested on the renovation of the Switzerland property?”

It’s almost nine pm on a Friday night after the week from hell. I’ve hardly eaten today and I’m two glasses in to not giving a fuck about work. I want to tell him to get lost and don’t call me on a Friday night, but I won’t, I can’t. We have always prioritized work over anything else in our lives, and it’s only now I’m understanding how wrong that is. The business will always be important, and to be honest, will take up most of my life, but there has to be a sliver of time for me, surely.

My father has only been able to do this most of his life because he didn’t have a wife or family to come home to. And up until now, I have been the same, but that changed that first night I spent with Flynn. It was like a switch flipped in my head and opened thoughts that I had pushed aside a long time ago. A partner, a family, a life.

“They are in your email. I sent them to you yesterday. They are also in the server stored with all the other documents on that hotel.” Normally I would offer to email them again to him, taking into consideration his age. But tonight, the answer in my head is ‘have a proper look and go find them yourself.’

“I’m getting sick of your incompetency. I will wait for them to arrive in my email. But I did need them this week. I have also decided you will need to travel there yourself to check on the plans and management of the commencement of the project. Hopefully you can manage that without making a mess of that too.” I can hear him mumbling to someone in the background, and I know the sole purpose of this phone call was to make me look bad in front of whoever he is meeting with.

The alcohol is taking over, and my reply is not how I would usually speak to him with someone else around, but tonight I’ve given up caring.

“Don’t be an asshole, Dad!” I yell into the phone, knowing he will hate me calling him that, and I’m not sure I’ve ever sworn at him either. “Shortly people will start to see through the bullshit you are feeding them. Why are you doing this to me?”

“Because you have shown you aren’t capable of taking over this company, and as much as that hurts me, I have to put the business and all its employees first.” The tone in his voice is flat and showing no emotion.

I shouldn’t have asked because I am just giving him ammunition to continue to degrade me in a room where I’m not there to defend myself. But my guess is these underhanded tactics are going to get more frequent as we get closer to my birthday that is now nine weeks away.

Rather than say anything else that is going to make this phone call worse, I just cut him off.

“Good night.” Disconnecting this call was all I could do before I became unhinged and started raving like the idiot he is telling everyone I am.

“Wow, just wow. I’ve never heard you speak to him like that. I thought we were supposed to be avoiding any trouble with him.” Harper starts giggling as she takes another sip of her drink. “But you go, girl.” She lifts her glass in the air toward me.

“Ughhh, I’ve had enough of doing as I’m told and keeping quiet. Tonight has been a shit storm, and it’s only about to get worse when I have to tell Flynn about Fulton. No matter how much it seemed like a good idea ten minutes ago, now I know it’s just plain stupid. I’m leading on a man I don’t want to be with, and the man I can’t stand to be without is going to be irate. How the hell am I going to fix this?”

“Okay, let’s think about this and make a plan.” Harper sits forward on the couch and tries to concentrate, and I’m sure it’s difficult when she’s in the middle of a great alcohol buzz.

Before I could answer or even think, my phone is ringing again, and now the excitement I had earlier has turned to that yucky anxious feeling you get in the bottom of your stomach when you have done something crazy and you don’t know how to fix it.

Not answering is not even option, and part of me needs to hear his voice to try to soothe my mind and the unsettled feeling I have.

“Hey.” I answer with one word because I’m not sure what to say without making the third problem of the night with my actions.

"Hi. Sorry I'm so late, it’s been a long day, but I'm almost there.” He sounds exhausted, and I know I’m not going to say a word tonight about the message from Fulton. That can be tomorrow’s problem.

“You are preaching to the choir,” I answer quietly, and I’m not sure if I meant for it to be an inside thought or to actually say it to Flynn.

“You okay, sweetheart?” I should have been the one asking him that after he admitted he’s had a bad day. But instead, he has switched off his own problems straight away because he detects the unsteadiness in my voice.

“I will be once you’re here.” And I know that’s the truth. I don’t know what I would do without him now.

Maybe Harper was right with what she said earlier.

Life is changing, and as much as I will always love her and we will be extremely close, things aren’t going to be the same anymore. She used to be my everything, the person I confided in, leaned on when I needed it. That won’t change, but it’s just that there are two of them, each giving me something different.

Harper makes me laugh, and we have shared all the good and bad times together.

But now there is Flynn.

And I already know where my heart will go when I need it put back together.

Unless he is the one who shatters it, and I’m not sure I would survive that no matter how much Harper is there for me.

My head hurts just thinking about it.

FLYNN

I can hear worry in Felisha’s voice, and that makes me put my foot down a little harder on the gas pedal.

This week has been hell being away from her. Facetime just doesn’t cut it.

Both being caught up in work until the late night hours and needing sleep, there have been short video chats, and it’s not the length of the call that’s the problem for me. It’s that I can’t touch her.

But I know I have to tread carefully with overstepping the line she has drawn me. There is a fine line between being protective and dominant which is my natural personality and being too overpowering, which is also my natural personality. So, as Tori told me today, I have to put my stern face from this week aside and instead keep concentrating on being soft and caring. Which didn’t go down well with me. I don’t need her to tell me how to handle Felisha, and for the first time, my reaction to Tori had her backing off and understanding this is actually something she needs to stay out of. She might have found a place in my life like my new adopted sister, but this is not the time to be pushy. Plus, I told her the first day back from her honeymoon was not the day to push my buttons. Not that she knows what has been going on while they were away.

Forrest and I have been looking into the structure of the Kentwall Estates and have records of who all the investors are. It might be privately owned, but over the years, there have been investors who bought a small share.

Felisha’s father Ewan owns the majority share and therefore has the controlling vote. Felisha has the second highest share, and once she inherits her father’s stakes, she then has the control. But what we found was enlightening in that if we can buy out all the other stakeholders and Felisha either took possession of that share or voted with the person who owned it all, which would be me, then she could remove her father from the board and take the chairman’s position, even without the clause about her fortieth birthday. Although her father would still have ownership, he would have no power.

It's complicated and would take a hell of a lot of non-disclosure agreements with the people we are negotiating with to buy their share. Plus, we would have to offer above the market price for their share to even get them to the table to discuss it. All of this without Ewan or Felisha getting wind of what we are up to. There are a hell of a lot of miracles that need to happen to make this work, and sadly we need everyone to agree, otherwise it’ll all have been for nothing. And all the time we have been working on this, my chest has been tight knowing that I’m going to hurt the woman who has captured my heart if she finds out that I’ve been going behind her back.

I think Forrest has asked me multiple times each day since we started, do I want to change my mind and tell Felisha, but my answer is the same every time. When the time is right, I’ll tell her everything.

Hanging up the call with her, I promise that I will be there as soon as I can, and whatever is bothering her, she won’t have the energy to think about it once I’m through with her. Her night is going to be consumed by the two of us, skin to skin, no talking and just being in the moment.

I know we are running short of time to make all these negotiations to the other parties involved. The money needed to do this is vast, and although my wealth is high, it will never match Felisha or the likes of Nic either. They are both in that next level of wealth that I’ll never reach. I’ve spoken to my bank and organized for a loan to be put in place to finance the deal if I can manage to get them all to agree to the sale. Forrest is concerned I am putting all I own on the line for someone I have only known a short time, but I don’t care. I know that he doesn’t really understand what is between Felisha and me. And until he’s been hit by the force of a woman you can’t walk away from like Felisha, he will always doubt my decision. Thankfully, though, through all the doubt, he is still on my team and guiding me. The financial world is his specialty, not mine.

But regardless of all Forrest’s worries, Nic turning up on my doorstep last night, the night he arrived home in London, was the reassurance I needed. First came the lecture asking me if I was out of my mind, followed by him demanding to know everything and where we are up to with it. Before Rem and Forrest both then arrived, and I knew that no matter what, they had my back.

Finally, Forrest and Rem had said their pieces and left Nic and me alone, which I really needed. We have been through a lot over the years, and he is the person I will always turn to for that stability when things are in a rough place. But before Nic left me to go home to his wife and there was just the two of us again, he told me there was no way I was going to the bank. He would help me to buy Felisha’s business out from under her father’s nose and would be happy to do it.

I must have had a worried look on my face as he said it, and his reassurance was fast coming. It had nothing to do with them being our competitor, to which I was relieved and never should have doubted him. He is as appalled as I am at the way Felisha has been treated by her father and wants to make sure he pays for what he has done. Again, he reminded me that he has more money than he can ever spend in a lifetime, and as far as he is concerned, I’m his family so it’s my money too. I don’t know if I can accept his generous offer, but at least I know it’s there if needed.

Rem gave us an update on what Broderick has started to find out about Ewan Kentwall, and it’s not pretty.

To the world he is Lord Ewan Kentwall, upstanding member of English society, but it’s so far from the truth.

He’s a gambler, and from what Rem can work out, he is not playing in the same room as the average man. No, he is playing with the big boys, and that usually doesn’t end well for most of them. Because a lot of the men at that table are playing with dirty money, and it’s not always a fair playing field. Corruption is rife, and if you make the wrong move against someone who has no problem destroying you, then every minute of the day, you need to be watching your back. And I’m worried he could be in deeper than any of us realize.

And my mind straight away wondered how much money he is gambling with and if it is in fact his actual money. They might have a lot, but playing with the devil can see that money disappear in the blink of an eye.

I just have to sit back and wait until the guys learn more and then make a decision about what we tell Felisha. It’s almost killing me.

Pulling into Forrest’s parking spot, it feels weird to be stepping into his life. He is the most private about his life out of all of us. Nic and I pretty much know everything about each other, and Rem has gotten better over the last few years, well, besides that one big secret of him and Lou being together; that didn’t go down well with me, but that’s another story. Although I might understand more now about secrets that need to be kept since I’m in the middle of the worst kind of secret myself. But Forrest is my brother, and I’ll be honest that I know less about his personal life than I do our friends’.

Some might think that’s weird, but we are just so different, and I spent so much time living in Australia that it has taken us a few years to get back to where we used to be, living in each other’s pockets twenty-four seven. He left home to go to university when I was only fourteen years old, and then I moved to the other side of the world. We grew up apart, and although I always lived in his shadow in my parents’ eyes, to be honest, I was so far away that I didn’t even truly know what his shadow was like.

The moment I walk into his apartment I light the fire then message Felisha while I am still busy undoing the buttons on my shirt sleeves, after I threw my jacket onto the ottoman in the living room. My shoes are off and I walk to the door, rolling my sleeves up as the soft knock echoes in the foyer, and my heart starts beating harder with anticipation.

I open the door and there she is, standing there as stunning as ever, but I wish I didn’t keep having her arrive on my doorstep looking like the world is on her shoulders.

“Come here, princess.” Stepping toward me, I pull her into my arms and kick the door closed. My arms are wrapped around her, and she squeezes me back just as tight. The unease I heard in her voice on the phone I can now feel in her body and the tension is seeping into me.

I tilt her head back from where she’s buried it against my chest, and she looks at me with her beautiful deep brown eyes, and I know exactly what they are asking of me.

“Time to make you forget and show you how much I’ve missed you.”

Not giving her time to answer, my mouth is on hers, and the world is already slipping away for both of us.