19. Fallout Shelter
Chapter 19
Fallout Shelter
Cece
“Dev?” I keep my tone soft, afraid to spook him. He doesn’t look angry anymore. Just defeated and sad. “What happened?”
He shakes his head. “You really don’t want to know.”
My back snaps up into defensive mode. I don’t appreciate being told what I want and don’t want. “Yes, I do. I’ve never seen you like that on the ice. It was terrifying.” My hands are clenched at my sides to hide the slight tremble, and my heart still hasn’t quite settled from the fear. I don’t want him to think I’m scared of him, though. He looks upset enough as it is.
“I can’t.” He shakes his head.
“Tell me. It might help. Beau looked more riled up than usual too, so it must have been bad.”
“Oh, fuck. It was.” He shifts on his feet, staring at his toes. “He was talking trash about you. ”
I reach up to rub at my chest, trying to ease the breathless pain. Not exactly what I was expecting. I’m way too sensitive to the judging eyes of random strangers, but being the target of one of my brother’s competitors on the ice is new. Or maybe it’s not. Maybe Beau has been dealing with this for a long time and he never wanted to hurt me. Ever protective. But then, it wasn’t Beau who lost it. He was mad, obviously, but he didn’t get himself sent to the penalty box. That was all Dev. A different kind of tingle skitters across my skin. It shouldn’t be hot, but it kind of is.
“What did he say?”
He looks up, brown eyes pained. “You don’t need to hear that. It was disgusting. He’s a piece of trash. Glad I took him out to the curb.”
“That can’t be good for you. I don’t want you getting in trouble for me.”
“Hey.” He closes his hand around my chin, tilting my face up to his. “You’re my girl now. No one talks about my girl like that. Ever. You’re worth the risk.” His eyes are shifting around, though. He looks nervous, and I hate that me being in his life could jeopardize his future.
I don’t say it out loud. That I don’t think I’m worth fighting for. Not worth risking things for. But it’s like he can see inside the tangled mess in my brain. The dark thoughts, and self doubt that I usually keep to myself. Because nobody needs to hear that. Or wants to hear it. A lady never complains, as my mother is fond of saying .
His face scrunches up in pain. “And he’s seen the pictures. They might be circulating again. I’m so sorry, Cece.”
My skin crawls. I’m never escaping those. That one stupid moment. Stupid mistakes like that shouldn’t be able to follow you for the rest of your life. But in this day and age, they do. And we’re back to that place where I’m bad for Dev. The man craves his privacy. Something he never had growing up. He shouldn’t have to carry my burden as well as his own. “I’ve got to go. Georgia is waiting for me in the car.”
I’m reluctant to leave him like this. He looks so upset, but the team usually goes out to celebrate a win or commiserate after a loss. He won’t want to come to silly old games night with me. And it’s probably better if he keeps his distance.
But his face falls, eyes drifting away, but not before I catch the lost look in them. I can’t bear to hurt him by pushing him away when he’s already down.
I guess it doesn’t hurt to ask. “You should come. We’re having a games night. Unless you’ve got other plans with your team.”
He dips his head to mine, capturing the lip I was nibbling on, and it steals my breath. His kiss is slow burn, fingers reaching up to tangle in my hair, pulling me closer until his tongue slips inside to trace mine, and the world fades away. When we’re together like this, nothing else seems to matter.
The metallic squeal of the back door shocks us apart. What am I doing? We’re out in public. Right behind the arena full of Dev’s teammates, including the one person who can’t find out about this .
Don’t be Beau. Don’t be Beau.
“Hey, Lucy, need a ride?”
I’m too scared to turn around. It’s one of his teammates, but since I’ve been avoiding them, I’m not too familiar with their voices.
Dev straightens. He reaches casually behind me, hands resting on my lower back for a moment before he slides one up my back, pulling my jacket’s hood up and over my ponytail, until it’s shadowing my face.
“I’m cool. I’ve got plans tonight. See you later.”
I’m resting a hand on his chest, and his heart is pounding as fast as mine. Georgia. I need her asap. I slip out my phone, sending a quick SOS.
Boots stomping on the pavement get closer and closer, and Dev pulls me in, tucking my head against his chest to conceal my face. His shirt is soft under my cheek, but I’m hyper aware of every movement behind us and can’t enjoy the proximity.
There’s a low whistle, and the disembodied voice is even closer this time. “Sure, drop the bomb out there and leave the rest of us to deal with the aftermath. Honestly, good on you. Beau is going to be a nightmare tonight. He hates losing. He’ll be beating himself up over it, and that’s no fun for anyone.”
Georgia’s bright red car in my peripheral vision is a beacon of safety as she squeals up in beside us.
“Nice ride. Are you sure I can’t come along?”
“Fuck off, JJ.” Dev’s words rumble against my cheek.
“Fine.” There’s an exaggerated sigh. “Catch you later. Or maybe not. If you’re smart, you won’t come home until tomorrow.” The footsteps finally start to recede.
“It’s safe.” It’s a low whisper in my ear.
Dev moves beside me, keeping me blocked from prying eyes as I step toward the safety of the car. I duck my head down, reaching out to fumble for the door. It swings open, and I slip into the back seat, leaning to the side until I’m almost horizontal.
One door slams and then another, while I remain hidden. The engine rumbles to life with a smooth purr that matches the laugh of its owner coming from the front seat.
“Hey, Dev. Cece, what are you doing back there? You look like you had an encounter with one of the ghosts that haunts the arena.”
“Close call with one of Beau’s teammates. For a minute, I thought it was him. I think I may have actually had a near death encounter. Pretty sure my heart stopped for a minute or two there.”
The car is shifting under me as we make progress out of the lot and onto the street.
“You’re safe now,” Georgia says.
But I wait another couple of minutes, exercising extra caution.
“You coming to games night with us, puck boy?”
Dev actually lets out a rare chuckle. Georgia has that effect on people.
“I guess.”
“Good. We could use some fresh blood. I was thinking of breaking out the Ouija board.”
That has me sitting up fast. “No, you’re not. Aren’t you the one who told me you’re not supposed to fuck around with those things? A demon in the house is the last thing we need.”
“There she is.”
She was messing with me, got it.
“Why are you bringing one home, then?”
Her head is cranked around to look at me rather than the road she should be focusing on.
“What are you talking about?”
“Don’t they call this one Lucy? For Lucifer? He sure looked like he was possessed tonight. What was that all about? I’m still a hockey newbie, but judging by how fast he got sent to the penalty box, I’m assuming that move wasn’t legal.”
I laugh. Why am I not surprised she’s done a deep dive into the team, including the origins of their nicknames?
“Asshole deserved it.”
“Fair point. No further questions. Let’s get home. We’re making Penne Vodka for dinner. You two can be in charge of the salad.”
The rumble of Dev’s stomach travels all the way to the back seat, and he reaches in his backpack for a snack. “Trail mix?” he offers. “If you don’t mind me eating in your car?” He turns to Georgia.
“No problem, sugar, but I’ll pass. Saving up for our delicious meal. ”
I shake my head so he’s the only one munching away on the short ride back to our place.
“Hey, you brought the jock!” Anna pulls her head off Blake’s lap as soon as we step into the house.
I come to an immediate halt when Dev freezes in place. I tug on his arm, trying to encourage him through the door.
“Don’t scare him away, Anna.” The other few times he’s been over, we were kind of occupied in my room and only emerged for brief periods to avoid starvation. While death by sex might seem glamorous, I’m not ready to check out yet. So, he hasn’t had much contact with my roommates yet. Now that I’m thinking about it, he may have been avoiding them.
“What? We’re not used to athletic types around here. Most of our friends have only played hockey with a video controller in their hand. If that.”
“Well, he plays video games, too. Obviously, he’s more well rounded than the rest of us.”
“I’d say he’s well rounded.” I give Georgia the stink eye when I turn to catch her appreciating his rear end with a covetous look in her eyes.
I lean back to hiss in her ear. “Mine. Eyes to yourself.”
She laughs, marching by us. “What are we playing? Clue, Cards Against Humanity, Risk?” I tilt my head up at Dev. “What do you feel like? We have pretty much everything you can think of. Our board game closet is epic. ”
He’s shifting from one foot to the other, arms crossed over his chest. I’m worried if he doesn’t relax, he’s going to leave, and I’d really like to keep him for the night. Or maybe the week. If only we had zero responsibilities. Snowed in for a week doesn’t sound so bad if I’m with him. But that is unlikely to happen in October.
“Whatever you want.”
“No, you’re our guest. I think you should pick. Come on.”
Blake is eyeing him curiously. “We pulled out a handful to choose from. Because I know you girls. If we don’t at least narrow it down, we’ll spend the rest of the night debating the merits of Scrabble versus poker and end up playing nothing. Check it out. You each get one veto.”
We make our way into the living room.
“I am absolutely not playing CAH while sober. Then you’ll know what a terrible person I really am. At least under the influence, I can blame the alcohol,” Georgia says.
“Fair. But I’m pretty sure we all know what a terrible person you really are, G.”
“Maybe, but Dev here still thinks I’m the angelic southern belle I pretend to be.”
That earns a short bark of a laugh from my guy, and I squeeze his hand.
“Risk is a hell no for me. Blake gets way too competitive, and I don’t want to be stuck at the same game all night. Dev?”
He grunts.
“What’s your veto?”
“Oh, I don’t... ”
“Yes,” Anna says. “We all get one veto. You’re one of us now, so pick your no go. Then we can choose one and get dinner started. I’m famished. I’ve been saving up room for this meal all day.”
Our weekly Friday night roommate dinners have turned into something of a tradition. It’s nice. We all cook together and play games. The kind of family I always wish I had. Beau and I did things together as kids, but more often than not, he was at hockey practice or games, and our parents were hardly ever around. I can’t even fathom the thought of them playing a game of Monopoly with us. And if they weren’t out for dinner, our cook was making something too fancy for our childish tastes. What kid wants to eat quail with all the bones and blackened Brussels sprouts? Not me. That’s for sure.
Anna’s plea gets him to admit his preference. “I don’t really like Charades. Not much of an actor.”
Georgia grabs the Charades cards and tosses them toward the closet. “Beautiful. Anna and Blake know each other too well, anyway. It’s like they can read each other’s minds. Not exactly a fair competition. What’s it going to be then, puck boy?” She lifts a brow at him, brushing a stray curl behind her shoulder.
He turns to me. “Your pick tonight. Choose wisely. Those feral creatures might not give you another chance. First time privilege.”
“I kind of like Catan.”
“Yes,” Blake says. “Good choice. Anna, want to get it set up with the extension while the pros get dinner started? ”
She nods, scooping up the rest of the games to stow in the closet, and the rest of us head to the kitchen for dinner prep.
Dev leans in closer, lips brushing my ear. “How are Rogue and Gambit doing?”
My insides get all warm and fuzzy at his concern for my pets. The pets he was terrified of the first time he saw them.
“They’re doing so much better. Do you want to go say hi?”
He hesitates. “Sure.”
“Amazing. Come on.”
I was a little suspicious that he was only doing this to get me alone, but instead of pulling me in for a kiss like I thought he would, he scoots over to the cages, bending down to peer in.
“Hey, guys. You doing good?” Rogue looks up, twitching her nose, and Gambit ambles over to sniff his finger.
The squeal that comes out of him is more suited to a sorority girl than a big tough hockey enforcer. He pulls away, then reaches out again to boop the twitchy nose.
“They like you.” Loki is weaving around in circles, giving me an affronted look. Such a diva. He really takes after his namesake, expecting immediate attention as soon as I walk through the door. He inches up to me when I go over. “Sorry boy. I’d normally let you out, but we’ve got company.”
“It’s okay.” Dev’s voice is so quiet, I think maybe I misunderstood him.
“What?”
“You can take him out and let him run around the house. Your roommates don’t mind, do they? ”
There’s a pinching sensation in my chest. “No, but I thought you...”
“I don’t mind. They’re important to you, and you are important to me. Take him out.”
The pinching turns into a full-on squeeze. He’s got my heart in a vice, and my insides are melting. “Are you sure?”
“I’m sure. I l... like seeing you happy.” He stumbles over the words, ducking his head.