The Perfect Deception (The Perfect Match #3)

Chapter Twenty-Seven

A dam sank onto the sofa af-ter work and turned on the base-ball game. Out-side, noise from the street be-low was muted, but he could hear the low bass of pass-ing cars and the higher tones of the com-muter train as it slowed on its way from Man-hat-tan. It was the train line he would have taken if he were work-ing for a big Man-hat-tan firm, but he wasn’t. He was work-ing for his fa-ther again, and this time, he was happy about it.

Open-ing a diet soda with a pop and a fizz, he gulped the car-bon-ated liq-uid and leaned his head back on the leather cush-ion. He’d put in a twelve-hour day at the of-fice, work-ing through lunch and not leav-ing be-fore seven. Af-ter the warm wel-come he’d re-ceived the other day in the con-fer-ence room, his friends at work had ac-cepted him once again. In fact, ev-ery-one had, even the par-ale-gals. Sure, there were still some peo-ple who kept their dis-tance, in-clud-ing James, but they were in the mi-nor-ity now. And pro-fes-sion-ally, he was sat-is-fied.

As the game went to com-mer-cial, an ad for a Man-hat-tan law firm ap-peared, and he thought about where he might have ended up if things had been dif-fer-ent. And for once, he didn’t have some deep de-sire to be in the city. Now, look-ing at the com-mer-cial, the law firm seemed cold and im-per-sonal, whereas it used to seem to be the em-bod-i-ment of his pro-fes-sional dreams. But that all changed once his fa-ther backed him up.

Had he re-ally been so des-per-ate for his fa-ther’s ap-proval? He shook his head. They still had a lot to work out, but know-ing his fa-ther sup-ported him meant a lot. Now if only he could fix the hole in his heart.

He looked to the side. If he had his way, that part of the couch would not be empty. Dina would be sit-ting there. Of course, if she were, they prob-a-bly wouldn’t be watch-ing base-ball…or maybe they would? She’d never been self-ish enough to pre-vent him from do-ing what he liked, and she’d al-ways tried to join in. He re-mem-bered the books she’d given him on su-per-heroes and how he’d ini-tially re-acted to them. He’d been so con-sumed with what oth-ers thought, he hadn’t rec-og-nized the ges-ture for what it was—some-one who was think-ing only of oth-ers.

God, he missed her. He’d spent weeks try-ing to get her back, to show her he was sorry, to demon-strate how much he cared. And she’d re-fused all of his over-tures. His hands chilled and sweat beaded his brow. How was he go-ing to get her back? If he thought he’d been afraid of her leav-ing him, it was noth-ing to know-ing she wasn’t com-ing back.

His ef-forts hadn’t been good enough. He’d lost her.

He took deep breaths, try-ing to con-trol his heart-beat. He would be okay.

The knock at the door star-tled him and he splashed soda out of the can as he rose. He took a peek through the peep-hole, blinked and looked again.

He opened the door.

“Dina.” There were so many things he wanted to say, but the sight of her, here, on his doorstep, left him speech-less. Her beau-ti-ful frizzy hair was pulled back into a low pony-tail. A pink scarf gave her cheeks a rosy glow. And the scent of co-conuts filled the air, mak-ing him want to fold her into his arms and in-hale her.

“Adam. I hope you don’t mind my just show-ing up—”

“Not at all. I’m glad you’re here.” Her ex-pres-sion was wary. He’d never seen that ex-pres-sion in them when she looked at him and his chest ached. Af-ter ev-ery-thing he’d done to show her how much she meant to him, she still had doubts? If only she’d been in his fa-ther’s of-fice to hear his speech.

He stepped out of the door-way and mo-tioned her in-side. She fol-lowed, not touch-ing him and leav-ing a mar-gin of space around her, like a per-sonal “Do Not Touch” zone. The Dina he re-mem-bered had never done that be-fore.

Lead-ing her into the liv-ing room, he pointed to the couch he’d va-cated, imag-in-ing his wish of her sit-ting next to him com-ing true. But she sat across the cof-fee ta-ble from him, as if she needed the phys-i-cal bar-rier be-tween them. Bands of pres-sure tight-ened around his chest.

“Sit down,” he said. “Would you like some-thing to drink? Eat?”

She shook her head no, mak-ing her curls bounce, mak-ing Adam’s fin-gers itch to touch them. He sat on his couch on top of his hands and stared at her, drink-ing her in. There were so many things he wanted to say to her, and he didn’t know what to say first. It was as if all the words he wanted to say rushed from his brain to-ward his mouth at once, couldn’t all fit, and sat be-hind his lips, try-ing to jam for-ward and get-ting stuck.

“I heard what you said,” she said, grip-ping her fin-gers un-til her knuck-les turned white.

What he’d said? When? Where? He wracked his brain try-ing to fig-ure out what she meant. Oh, his phone calls.

“You mean the mes-sages I left on your voice mail.”

She bit her lip. “No. I deleted those.”

The bands around his chest grew tighter. He cleared his throat. “Oh. The texts?”

She shook her head. “No, I still have those, but I meant the video.”

Oh God, there’s a video? Im-ages of Kar-dashian sex tapes fil-tered through his mind. What the hell had he done? “What video?”

She pulled out her phone, tapped on the screen and held it out to him. His breath ex-pelled in a whoosh of re-lief, be-fore he in-haled sharply, mak-ing him-self choke. Dina half rose as if to help him, but he waved her away, rubbed his stream-ing eyes and sat back on the couch. “Where did this come from?”

She shrugged. “I found it on Red-dit.”

Only now did her ear-lier words sink in. I heard what you said. Never mind where the video had come from, she’d watched it.

In his head, he knew that ad-mit-ting he’d been wrong was the right thing to do. It was hon-or-able and hon-est and some might even say, brave. And al-though he’d cho-sen to do it in a room-ful of peo-ple he worked with, it had been eas-ier than one would think be-cause Dina wasn’t there. He’d only had to say his side of the story. She hadn’t been there to re-spond or re-ject him.

But she was here now. He should be thrilled be-cause he’d been try-ing to talk to her for weeks with-out suc-cess. Her show-ing up at his apart-ment was un-ex-pected, but meant she wanted to talk to him too. His heart pounded and his throat went dry. He reached for his soda and took a long swal-low. God, what he’d give for a beer right now. But he’d been over-do-ing it lately and the last thing he wanted was to blow this time with Dina. So he fo-cused on her and tried to calm the bounc-ing ball of fear in his chest.

“That was quite an apol-ogy you gave,” she said.

“I meant ev-ery word, and more.”

“Why did you tell them? They don’t know me.”

He leaned for-ward, rest-ing his el-bows on his knees. “My dad made this big speech about me. About how I was in-no-cent. And about how you were the one to prove it to him. He was hon-est, and I felt I needed to be too. In-clud-ing about how badly I’d treated you and how sorry I was. Be-cause I wanted a fresh start. And I couldn’t have one un-less I told them ev-ery-thing.”

She rose and he opened his mouth to stop her from leav-ing. But she was only pac-ing and he kept his gaze trained on her, ready to jump up and block the door if she left, or bet-ter yet, fall to his knees and beg her to stay.

“I don’t un-der-stand what hap-pened the night of my re-union. One mo-ment, those women were telling me ridicu-lous lies, the next mo-ment you shut down and then you ac-cused me of be-ing in col-lu-sion with them.”

Col-lu-sion . God, he loved her. Even if she didn’t love him back. “Those ‘ridicu-lous’ things were ac-cu-rate.” At her look of sur-prise, he held up his hand. “No, I didn’t lie about giv-ing her the ma-te-rial to file. I didn’t throw her un-der the bus. But the women were right about the per-sonal stuff. Be-fore you, I never com-mit-ted to any-one. ”

“I know.”

Now it was his turn to look shocked.

She laughed. “Come on, Adam, your per-son-al-ity, at first glance, screams player. I’m sure you’ve done plenty of things with plenty of women be-fore me. I don’t care about any of it, as long as it hap-pened be-fore me.”

He swal-lowed, afraid if he spoke, he’d pop what-ever bub-ble there was sup-port-ing this fan-tasy and fall splat back into re-al-ity.

“What I do care about is ev-ery-thing else,” she said.

He ran a hand over his head. How could he pos-si-bly ex-plain this to her? He’d show all his in-se-cu-ri-ties at once. Tak-ing a deep breath, he took the plunge. “We were danc-ing and I told you I loved you and you didn’t re-ply.” A squeak made him look up and he held up a hand. “No, don’t. It’s fine. You didn’t have to say it then, or at all for that mat-ter. I didn’t tell you be-cause I wanted you to say any-thing. I told you be-cause it’s what was in my heart and I wanted you to know. But then the ac-cu-sa-tions started and I saw you with them and I didn’t know what they’d told you. And know-ing my rep-u-ta-tion, I was afraid you’d be-lieve them.”

“I never knew her, never liked any of her friends, and no re-union is go-ing to change that. I’d never be-lieve them over you. They mean noth-ing to me.”

“I know that now, but I pan-icked.”

“Why?”

“Be-cause I was afraid you’d leave me. I was so twisted up in-side over my dad fir-ing me, I let it bleed into my re-la-tion-ship with you. I’m so sorry.”

“You should have had faith in me. And if you had doubts, you should have told me.”

He nod-ded. “I know. I knew you weren’t re-ally with them. I ac-cused you of be-ing on their side be-cause that way I could leave you first.”

“Why?”

He nod-ded. “You’re the first per-son I’ve ever fallen in love with. I mean, re-ally fallen in love with. Dina, I love ev-ery-thing about you—your hair, your smile, the way you don’t take me too se-ri-ously, your vo-cab-u-lary and the crazy facts you know. All of it. And it ter-ri-fied me. Be-cause I was afraid when you knew the whole story about Ash-ley, you’d leave. It was okay you didn’t tell me you loved me—I had time to change that—but if you’d walked out on me, it would be the sec-ond per-son I’d loved who’d done that and I couldn’t have lived with it. So I left first.”

“You didn’t think I’d be-lieve you if you told me the truth?”

“My fa-ther didn’t.”

“Your fa-ther is an ass.”

Adam laughed. “I used to think so too. Now I’m not so sure.”

“And I’m not your mother.”

Adam froze. “What?”

Dina moved onto the couch next to him, ex-actly where he’d wanted her to sit when she’d first walked in. Only now he wished she were any-where else. His heart pounded in his chest and the bands of pres-sure squeezed so hard, spots flick-ered in front of his eyes. He didn’t want to talk about his mother.

His hand grew cool and he looked down to see Dina’s hand cov-er-ing it, her thumb stroking across his knuck-les.

“I’m not your mother. And her leav-ing had noth-ing to do with you.”

“You don’t know that.”

“No, I don’t. Only your fa-ther does, and he could prob-a-bly give you the an-swers you’re look-ing for. But I do know that chil-dren are never the cause of their par-ents’ prob-lems. What-ever her rea-sons for leav-ing, it was not a lack of love for you.”

Adam gripped Dina’s hand. “I have this ir-ra-tional fear that if I let go, you’ll dis-ap-pear, like when Darth Vader killed Obi Wan.” Oh God, tell me I didn’t just say that. What was it about her that made all his de-fenses shut down? She’d think he was a cow-ard, a geek cow-ard, which might be even worse. He let his head fall for-ward, not want-ing to see the laugh-ter in her gaze, laugh-ter that would be di-rected at him.

“Hey,” she said, her voice low and thought-ful.

When he raised his head, her mouth was se-ri-ous, her gaze somber. She cupped his cheek with her free hand. Her skin was soft, smooth and cool, pro-vid-ing an-other touch point he didn’t want to lose, and he cov-ered it with his other hand. “You can hold on for as long as you’d like. I’m not go-ing any-where, even when you let go. And I’m not go-ing to turn into any Force ghost.”

The bands of pres-sure in his chest loos-ened and calm set-tled over him for the first time in as long as he could re-mem-ber. He let go of the hand on his cheek and pulled her close, in-hal-ing the co-conut scent of her hair as he tried to keep his breath-ing steady.

“I love you,” she whis-pered against his ear.

He pulled away. “You don’t have to say it. I don’t de-serve it.”

She stroked the side of his face. “I’ve wanted to say it for weeks, but I was scared. And then when you said it to me at the re-union, I didn’t just want to prat-tle it back to you like some talk-ing par-rot. My feel-ings mean too much for me to do that.”

“Why?” When she frowned, he hur-ried to con-tinue. “No, not why do your feel-ings mean some-thing. Why would you pos-si-bly love me af-ter the way I treated you?”

“Be-cause I can see through you. I see who you are in-side.” She touched his chest and he wished for her skin to touch his. “I don’t care about the rest of this—your money, your looks, your job, al-though I’m glad you have one be-cause it makes you happy and ev-ery-one needs to make a liv-ing. But that’s not why I love you. I’d love you if you were a jan-i-tor on a bi-cy-cle.”

The im-age made Adam laugh and he hugged her to him, kiss-ing the part in her hair. Af-ter a mo-ment, he grew se-ri-ous again. “But af-ter the way I’ve treated you?”

She pulled away and he tamped down the au-to-matic fis-sure of fear. She was still here. She said she wouldn’t leave. He had to be-lieve her.

“I hate the way you treated me. You for-got who I am and what about me makes you love me, and while you’re very good at apol-o-giz-ing, that can’t hap-pen again. I can’t be with some-one who doesn’t trust me, and I won’t be with some-one who thinks so lit-tle of me they’ll drop me any-time some-thing gets hard.”

“How do I fix this? Be-cause you mean more to me than any-one and I don’t ever want to let you go.”

Dina bit her lip and Adam wanted to draw her into his arms and hold her close. But he’d learned he had to give her free-dom, trust her to come back to him, even on the lit-tle things, like pulling away from him to think. So he sat and he waited.

“You showed me you’re sorry and what I mean to you by your calls and your texts and the flow-ers and herbs that all had mean-ings be-hind them.”

“I’m glad you un-der-stood it.”

She smiled. “Tracy helped at first. Then I caught on. It was im-pres-sive. A lit-tle over-the-top, but im-pres-sive.”

He nod-ded.

“And you showed me you’re not em-bar-rassed by me with your speech to your co-work-ers.”

“I never ex-pected it to go on-line,” he said.

“You’ve given me more than enough rea-sons to for-give you, and I do. I think I need us to take things slow, to talk and to see how things go from here.”

He nod-ded and they sat in si-lence for sev-eral min-utes. Their only con-tact was the touch of their hands. Adam con-cen-trated on the way her skin felt against his. Al-though her hands were per-pet-u-ally cold, her touch sent a path of warmth up his arm, straight to his heart. The apart-ment was silent, ex-cept for the sounds of their breath-ing and the hum of the re-frig-er-a-tor in the back-ground, and he had the urge to min-gle more than the sound of their breath.

“Would kiss-ing you be mov-ing too fast?” he asked, glanc-ing side-ways at her.

Her hair swung as she shook her head, and it was all the en-cour-age-ment he needed. Wrap-ping his arm around her shoul-der, he threaded his fin-gers through her hair as he drew her head to-ward him. Their lips touched, their breath min-gled and at last, he was where he be-longed.

When they fi-nally pulled apart, she stared at him. “You know,” she whis-pered, “I might be will-ing to com-pro-mise on the speed.”

He bent his fore-head un-til it touched hers. “What-ever you want, for as long as you want, I will be yours and you can be mine.”

And it was enough.

The End

Thank you for read-ing this con-tem-po-rary ro-mance where love truly con-quers all! If you loved THE PER-FECT DE-CEP-TION, check out A RECK-LESS HEART, Book One of the Scarred Hearts Se-ries. It’s Beauty and The Beast meets the Kar-dashi-ans, and you won’t want to miss it.