The Perfect Play (Nolan U Football #5)

Chapter 1

DANI

Offside is busy for a Monday night. It makes me grateful that I’ve got the next two days off. Two years ago, if you’d told me I was going to be tending bar in a small town like Nolan, I would have laughed in your face.

But a lot can change in two years.

The glass in my hand starts to slip, and I squeeze it a little tighter, focusing on the beer I’m pulling and not the man I’m desperately trying to escape. He haunts my every day, and that’s why I moved.

That’s why I packed my bags, hugged my family goodbye, and took a job with Tobin’s boyfriend. It was the out I’d been waiting for. And now I have to make the most of it.

Tobin and I grew up together—next-door neighbors and elementary school buddies. I’m so glad I kept in touch with him, even after he left for college. When he suggested I come to Nolan for a change of scenery, I initially said no, but it took all of three days for me to change my mind.

And here I am.

“There you go.” I place the beer down with a bright smile, handing over the card reader so the sexy man across the bar can tap his Visa card.

Damn, he is fine.

I take in his stunning smile—all straight white teeth—and those glittery blue eyes.

It’s impossible not to grin back.

This is exactly what I need.

Some hot guy giving me a flirty smile, distracting me, pulling me away from a life I can’t live anymore.

That’s why I’m here.

Fresh start.

New beginnings.

All that shit.

I can’t keep being single, pining for a man I can never have.

Because I can seriously never be with Atlas again. He’s gone. Died in my arms. And I’ve spent too many days, weeks, months mourning him. If I didn’t make a drastic change, I was going to wake up from my stupor in fifty years and realize life had passed me by.

I can’t keep doing this anymore.

And so I’m here, with my heart held together by string and duct tape, barely hanging on while I try to let go of the man I thought I’d marry. My one true love.

Clearing my throat, I try to shake off the blues and flash this guy another bright smile.

“You let me know if you need anything else.” I raise my voice to be heard above the guy crooning on the stage and the cacophony of voices surrounding the bar.

He raises his glass and smiles at me. “I will definitely be calling you over again.”

My smile grows while my nerves flail.

Yes, you want this, Dani. You need this!

Ask for his number. Be bold. I dare you.

Brushing my teeth over my lower lip, I go against every grain in my body and rest my elbows on the bar. I know the move squishes my boobs together, because his eyes dart south for a second before popping back up to my face.

A sizzle rushes through me.

I haven’t had sex since Atlas died. My wasted body is like the Sahara Desert, and although the idea of sleeping with some random guy doesn’t sit well with me, a primal part of me needs to get laid.

My insides tremble as I run my fingertip across the bar and force myself to say it. “Maybe I can give you my number… and you can call me if you need me.”

Ugh! I can’t believe you just said that.

My entire body is cringing as he lets out a soft laugh and snatches a napkin from next to the bowl of pretzels. “How about I give you mine?”

Pulling a pen from my apron, I hand it over, and he scribbles down his number before handing it to me.

It flops in front of my hand, and I have to tell myself to take it, to read the name beneath those digits.

“Nice to meet you, Sutton.”

“You too, Dani.” He points to my name tag, and yeah, I really do hate wearing one, even if it does mean I don’t have to introduce myself to people. “You give me a call and maybe we can hang out sometime.”

I nod, slipping the number into my back pocket. “I’ll do that.”

His smile grows a little wider, and I have that second of doubt—will he answer if I call? Will he reply if I text?

Shit, this dating thing sucks!

Atlas and I met in high school. Everything about it was so natural and simple and easy.

Now I’m trying to get back into the world, and it all feels impossible.

I’ll love Atlas forever, but it’s time to move on, and I had no idea how challenging that would be. Putting myself out there is terrifying. But if I don’t start living again… I’m gonna shrivel up and die.

I want to love my life again.

I want to feel something other than despair… or that hollow numbness that’s been feasting on me for way too long now.

So, I will call Sutton. And I’ll ask him out on a date, and I’ll go to that damn thing, and I’ll enjoy it. Because I have to.

Because I need—

“Dani!”

I turn to see who just shouted my name… and the air in my lungs goes still, my eyes bulging as I stare down the bar and double-check that I am in fact seeing what I’m seeing.

No way.

No freaking way.

My lips part, my heart catapulting into my throat as that tall glass of water at the end of the bar raises his hand and gives me a shy smile.

It’s still the same.

Even after all this time.

He may look stronger, tougher even… but that smile hasn’t changed.

“Tyrell Jackson,” I whisper under my breath as a force I can’t counter drags me down toward Atlas’s best friend.

A giddy feeling I wasn’t expecting fills me up, bubbling and bursting in my chest. And before I know it, a laugh is punching out of me. “Tyrell Jackson? No way!” I slap the bar. “What are you doing here?”

“What are you doing here?” He points at me.

I tip my head back with another laugh, still surprised by just how happy I am to see him. It’s taking everything in me not to climb over the counter and give him a big ol’ hug. From memory, Tyrell always gave the best hugs, those full-body, hold-you-close kinds.

He was like that with everybody, which is probably why he always had a gaggle of girls chasing after him. He was always so oblivious to it, though.

Tyrell Jackson.

Nostalgia sweeps through me as I try to answer his question without my voice shaking. “I just moved here in January. New year. Fresh start. You know how it is.” My throat closes up, because he does know. If anyone in this town gets it, it’s him.

Shit, there’s so much history between us.

So much knowledge. Memory.

My chest starts to hurt as he leans against the bar, watching me with those deep brown eyes of his. “So… you doing okay?”

I have to give him an honest smile—none of that bright, plastic cheese will work on him. I shrug and throw it back on him. “How about you?”

“Yeah.” He nods, then licks his bottom lip and swallows. “Nolan’s good. ’Bout to finish my senior year.”

I should be too.

So should Atlas.

Shit, life did not turn out at all how we’d planned.

“Congratulations,” I croak, my eyes dipping to the counter as memories try to take me out. It suddenly hurts to look at him.

“You ever gone back?” I murmur, unable to recall seeing him around.

I can’t picture his face since the funeral, so he must have come back up to Nolan and just stayed away.

I’d forgotten that he moved up here for college.

I didn’t realize he’d stayed. Maybe I assumed his life would have screeched to a halt the way mine did…

and he’d crawled into a dark cave to lick his wounds and try to recover.

“My family’s in Texas now, so…”

“Okay.” I nod, my chin still dipped as I pick at the counter between us. “Yeah, I stayed for a while, but you know, he was just everywhere. It didn’t matter how much time passed, I couldn’t dodge the memories.” My eyes start to burn as I look up and take in his sad expression.

Shit. Does he miss Atlas as much as I do?

They were best friends. Closer than brothers.

They grew up together. Tyrell was always there—the quiet one, happy to stay in the background while Atlas took center stage. Happy to follow his buddy around, keep him safe.

Until he moved to Nolan and only came back for special occasions.

Atlas missed him so bad but didn’t want to say anything.

He got worse after Tyrell left… and I couldn’t control him.

He started hanging out with his band all the time, and from the outside, that probably seemed like a good thing, but he wasn’t the same without Tyrell’s calm presence.

There was no one there to check his wild side.

That was why I’d been so relieved that Tyrell was coming down for the show. He was gonna be there backstage with me and then come to the after-party. Maybe if he had, things wouldn’t have turned to shit.

He was there. He was just late.

Too late.

My aching chest starts to throb with a dull, familiar beat that makes my legs want to buckle.

Crossing my arms, I suck in a breath and try to dodge images of Atlas’s pale face, those eyes that kept staring at nothing.

He wouldn’t blink.

I couldn’t make him blink.

“It’s been…”

“Two years, three months, and ten days,” he finishes for me, and I can tell that night is still burned into his memory as clearly as it’s burned into mine.

I try to smile, but who knows what the hell my face is doing. With a slow nod, I force myself to admit, “It’s been really hard to move on, you know?”

“Yeah,” he rasps. “I get it.”

“But I have to learn to live without him.” I shrug, almost feeling bad for saying it. Tyrell was Atlas’s best friend. Will this feel like a betrayal to him? Atlas’s girl moving on? “I’m hoping a change of scenery will help,” I finish in a rush.

“It will,” he assures me. “I wouldn’t have survived if I hadn’t had this place. I would have… drowned in Colorado Springs. He would have haunted me around every corner. Being up here has… helped me… move on.”

My eyes shoot up to meet his tortured gaze. “Yet you still know exactly how long it’s been since that night.”

His forehead wrinkles, and I can feel his pain, still so raw. I get it. We can try to wrap our wounds, cover them with Band-Aids, but you peel back that tape and it’s still just below the surface, fresh and painful.

“Hey, Dani! We’ve got people waiting,” Jed calls. “Can I get a hand down here?”

“Sure thing.” I hold up my finger, relief flooding me. “One second.” Looking back up at the tall man in front of me, I give him a smile—a familiar affection pulsing inside me. “It’s nice to see you again, Ty.”

And I mean it. Although his presence brings with it a plethora of painful memories, there are also a bunch of happy ones in there too. This nostalgic feeling is kinda nice.

“Yeah, you too, Dani.”

I spin and walk back down the bar, heading for the group of girls—a giggling clump out for a good time.

Taking their orders, I focus back on opening bottles and mixing cocktails.

I force myself not to search the space for Tyrell. I don’t want to look at him again tonight.

As nice as it is to see him, it’s also a knife right through the chest. It took all of two seconds for us to start talking about Atlas, reliving our shared pain as if it only happened yesterday. Do I really want to be hanging around someone like that?

It’s like intentionally putting myself in the line of fire, and… well, I came to this place to move on.

How could I forget that Tyrell had come here to play football?

I still remember when Atlas found out he’d gotten in. He’d been gutted. He wanted his best friend to play at Denver U, but the boy got a scholarship to Nolan instead, and he took it.

Atlas never once let it show, but he turned up at my house the night Tyrell told him with tears in his eyes. All I could do was hold him tight. He spent the night in my bed, glued to my side, and I didn’t know what to say to make him feel better.

Shit. If I’d remembered Tyrell was here, would I have taken Tobin up on the invite to move in with him and Jed? Would I have taken this job at Offside?

The truth is… probably not.

Because I’m trying to put my past behind me… and Tyrell Jackson is a glaring reminder of everything I lost.

Thank God graduation isn’t too far away. Hopefully he’ll be leaving town. Maybe he’ll move to Texas to be close to his family.

I don’t know, and I can’t care.

As long as he leaves Nolan, everything will be okay.

All I have to do is avoid him for the next couple of months… and maybe then I’ll have a shot at leaving Atlas behind me and creating a life with someone new.