The Secret Life of Beatrice Alright

Chapter 47

FORTY-SEVEN

‘Cora!’ Ellie shrieks.

She’s overjoyed to see Cora. And I realise that, while I’ve been missing my best friend, Ellie has been missing the only other adult who has been a constant in her life since birth. I scold myself for a moment for not talking to my little girl about it.

‘Hey there, gorgeous,’ Cora says, stretching her arms wide and swallowing Ellie up in a giant bear hug. ‘You ready to go fly a kite?’

Ellie has no idea what’s happening but that doesn’t stop her from agreeing to it all and being so full of excitement her eyes bulge.

‘Will she be in tomorrow?’ Alannah asks, clip-clopping in new, chunky heels around reception.

‘No idea.’ I shrug.

‘Okay, no worries. Just if you could let us know…’

I stare at her blankly.

‘Or you can just pop it in the app. Do you have the app?’

‘I have the damn app.’

Alannah jerks her head back until she has three chins. ‘You can pay late fees on the app now too, by the way, so it’s in everyone’s best interest to keep it updated and active.’

‘I have it,’ I snap.

‘Byeee, Ellie,’ Alannah says.

Ellie turns her head over her shoulder and blows Alannah a kiss.

‘I loved the manager’s shoes,’ Cora says.

‘Meh, I prefer wellies in this weather,’ I say with a shrug.

Ellie talks the entire way across town. Cora laps it up like rays of joy she’s been missing. They giggle together and Ellie throws her arms round Cora sporadically and without warning and sometimes it looks as if Cora never wants to let go. I hadn’t realised how much they’d missed each other. With everything that was going on, I hadn’t taken the time to really think about much I missed Cora too. It’s been less than three weeks since the three of us were together like this, but so much has happened it feels like months. Or even years. It’s so good to be together again.

The park is busier than I was expecting. People are wrapped up warmly for the weather and scrolling carefree, as if the icy wind and thick cloud overhead is a pleasant as a summer’s day. Teenagers whizz by on bicycles, laughing the way that age group do. A toddler wails in a buggy, and a flustered young father tries to calm her. An elderly couple shuffle by, hand in hand, their backs curved like commas.

‘The paths are salted down this way,’ Cora tells them, pointing towards a windy tarmac pathway that leads towards the main car park.

‘Thank you, but we’re off to feed the deer,’ the elderly man tells us as he steps off the footpath and onto long grass.

‘They love the scraps,’ the woman says, pointing towards the plastic bag she carries. Then they shuffle away slowly.

‘Was that a giant bag of lettuce?’ Cora says, struggling to hold in a laugh.

‘I think so.’

‘Is that allowed?’ Shayne asks. ‘I mean, are you supposed to feed the wild animals?’

I shrug. ‘No idea. But I don’t see what harm it could do?’

‘It’s not as if they’re stuck for food,’ Malcolm says, stretching his arms out to highlight the wide-open grassy space.

‘No. But if it makes them feel good.’

‘Do you always do that?’ he asks.

‘Do what?’

‘Make excuses for old people just because they’re old?’

‘What?’

‘You’re not supposed to feed the deer. They have everything they need right here. They’ll probably have the scutters later from eating shrivelled lettuce. Someone will step in it, ruin their shoes and blame the animals. When really it was two busybodies with a bag of left-overs that were the problem.’

‘Do you think it will make them sick?’ I ask.

‘Don’t know. But I think if it was a thirty-something-year-old couple, like you two’ — he points to Shayne and then to me. I blush, and I hope he doesn’t notice as he continues to make his point — ‘then I think you’d see it differently. You’d wonder what the hell they were thinking.’

Would I? Am I guilty of treating elderly people differently? I didn’t think so, but maybe Malcolm is right. Their bodies may be slower but they’re not children, and yet sometimes I am guilty of speaking to them as if they are. I’m not quite sure how to rectify it; it’s not as if I can chase after the lettuce couple and tell them they’re going to give deer diarrhoea from rotten salad. I decide I’ll do better with Malcolm instead. I can start by jumping less every time he so much as sneezes.

‘Right, c’mon,’ I say, ‘it’s getting windy and we should get some good height with these.’

I point to the bag of kites Shayne has been guarding with his life. We settle ourselves in front of the Wellington monument, where the grass is too short for the deer to enjoy, there are no trees and kites can take flight in the wide, open skies.

Malcolm’s kite is first up. The tail flaps furiously and at one point I hold my breath when a large gust of wind almost takes his feet off the ground. I’m about to warn him to be careful when I remind myself that he is a grown man and can think for himself.

Shayne’s kite is next up. He chuckles with satisfaction when it soars even higher than Malcolm’s.

‘Take that, Grandad.’

I reach into the bag and pass Cora a kite.

‘Oh, teal,’ she says.

‘That’s green,’ Ellie corrects her.

Cora struggles to get her kite up, but she finally gets the knack and soon she is running around the open space like a child. Ellie takes her unicorn kite and follows her. Their laughter carries in the wind and my heart soars almost as high as the kites. Finally, I toss mine in the air and a sharp gust whips it up.

The kites brighten up the cloudy sky like multicoloured sprinkles on a white-frosted cupcake. Cora begins to sing the kite song from the end of Mary Poppins , although she seems to only know a couple of lines from the chorus, and sings them on repeat. Ellie joins in. And Shayne. Malcolm doesn’t sing, but the smile on his face as his kite zigzags over his head, flapping like a gloriously colourful bird, tells me that inside his heart is full of song.

I take a step back and watch them: my long-term best friend. My daughter. And two men, who just weeks ago were strangers but right now, as we stand in the freezing park but are somehow warm inside, have become such an important part of my life. I want to remember this moment for ever. I lower my kite, with a degree of difficulty as the enthusiastic wind want to keep playing, and I take my phone from my pocket. I snap several shots and check them out. There are some blurry ones, because everyone is moving too much. Some with the backs of heads, or someone missing. But there is one shot where everyone is there and the camera has caught a smile on all of their faces.

I take a deep breath as an idea comes to me, and scroll through my contacts, stopping when I come to Elaine’s number. I don’t give myself time to think as I type a message and attach the photo.

Have you seen Mary Poppins? MrBanks was a shitty dad, but then he flew a kite with his kids. We’re in the phoenix park. Next to the wellington monument. It’s not too late to fly a kite with your dad. Bea x

Elaine sees the message and she starts typing. But then she stops. She starts again. And stops. The start/stop continues for a while, until finally the stop remains and she doesn’t send a reply. I try not to let it deflate me too much as I rejoin the group, but it’s harder to laugh now.

‘I need to do a wee,’ Ellie announces loudly.

‘Can you hold it for a little while?’

Ellie shakes her head. I glance at my watch and I’m shocked to discover more than two hours have passed since I texted Elaine. Ellie begins to hop from one foot to the other.

‘I bursting,’ she says, her face all scrunched up, and I can tell she’s concentrating hard to hold it.

‘Okay, okay,’ I say, lowering my kite and helping her to lower hers. ‘We’ll be back in a minute,’ I tell Shayne. He makes a face that asks if everything is okay. ‘Needs a wee,’ I explain.

He nods.

‘C’mon, chickpea. Let’s find a loo.’

‘They’re over there,’ a familiar voice behind me says, and my eyes bulge when I turn round and find Elaine standing behind me. ‘I don’t have a kite,’ she goes on.

‘Oh.’ I swallow my shock. ‘You can take mine.’

I bend down and pass her my colourful kite.

She doesn’t say a word. Shayne seems lost for words also until he finally says, ‘You know, I could use the restroom too.’

Cora seems to catch on quickly. ‘Me too. I’m bursting.’

Malcolm and Elaine don’t seem to notice us leave. They stand facing each other, their kites by their sides like pistols, as if they are going to turn back to back, take ten paces, turn and shoot. Uncertainty swirls inside me as we gain distance on them. I squash it quickly, reminding myself that Elaine is Malcolm’s daughter. Nothing is going to happen to him because we take our eyes off him for a few minutes and leave them to talk.

‘I can’t believe it,’ Shayne says as we walk. ‘I wonder how she knew we were here.’

‘Didn’t she used to go kite-flying with Malcolm when she was a kid?’

Shayne’s eyes fill with tears and I feel awful. I thought I was resurfacing a happy memory.

‘Yeah,’ he says, sniffling.

‘Are you okay?’ I ask. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.’

‘Mam’s here. They’re talking. Thank you,’ he says, a teary crackle breaking up his voice.

‘All I did was send a photo,’ I say.

‘And it was everything.’