Chapter 11
Ithought faking my own death was twisted. I thought lying to my best friend was irredeemable. But as I stagger under Giovanni’s weight while carrying out Sera’s orders, I realize this is the most fucked up situation I’ve been in. This isn’t the way of La Cosa Nostra. We don’t forgive traitors, we don’t bandage up their wounds and send them on their merry way.
What I’m thinking is exactly what Sera is doing to me. She’s shutting me out because I hurt her, because I betrayed her. Maybe not like Giovanni did, but I lied to her and kept my survival a secret. So why does Giovanni get her forgiveness? Why not me?
I finally reach the pool house, sweat beading along my forehead as I push inside. Giovanni isn’t much taller than me, but he’s bulkier, meaning it’s not easy to lumber his dead weight around. In fact, I grumble the entire way because Sera refused to let anyone help me. I call it punishment, and I can’t fault her for that because it gives me hope that I can still redeem myself. I can still fix things between us.
Pushing through the door to the pool house, I stomp through to the bedroom and drop Sera’s bodyguard onto the bed. He bounces against the mattress with an audible grunt, pain visibly creasing his features. He’s still worse for the wear, blood coating pretty much every inch of his body. While I left his dignity intact—keeping his pants on—I’m still pretty pleased with the masterpiece I created. There’s no way our traitor is going to be forgetting this day anytime soon, as I’ve left enough marks on his body to scar, the perfect reminder of the consequences of his transgressions.
“Wash up,” I bark. “Doctor’s coming by.”
Giovanni pushes up off the bed, body swaying as he tries to find his balance. He stumbles and catches himself against the wall, confusion creeping across his face as he catches his breath.
“Thanks,” he finally mutters.
“Don’t thank me. If it were up to me, you’d still be bleeding out in that basement,” I snap, marching towards him. “Which is something I’ll never understand. Why the fuck do you get pardoned for what you did and I’m still getting the cold shoulder for doing what you couldn’t?” I huff out in agitation and turn on my heel, not waiting for an answer. Giovanni is the last person I want to hear from right now.
“Start… with…” Giovanni groans behind me, causing me to pause in my path. “An apology.”
An apology?My brows furrow, but I refuse to look at the traitor. If that was all it took for Sera to forgive me, I’d do it in a heartbeat.
Is it really that easy?
I don’t want to give Giovanni’s words any more thought. I slam the door behind me as I leave, making my way across the patio towards the house. My anger is still simmering beneath the surface. Not just because Sera released Giovanni against my advice, but because I got into another fight with Levi, and I’m no closer to making amends with him.
It’s not exactly my intention to keep getting into arguments with my cousin, but even though I saw what was happening over the last few months as part of my surveillance, seeing it play out in front of my face hits harder. I don’t even care that Levi is gay, or bi-sexual—whatever! It’s the fact Levi and Sera have something, a relationship I never admitted I wanted until it was too late. The truth is, I never thought I was worthy of Bianchi. She was my best friend, someone I wanted to protect with my life—and I did. But that came at a cost, a price I should never have considered. I’m an outsider now, watching my best friend live a life I should be a part of.
“We need to talk.” Sera’s voice snatches my attention as soon as I step into the living room. She stands in her red power suit, arms folded with a no-nonsense attitude strengthening her stance. Giovanni’s words linger in the back of my mind, and I wonder whether it really is as easy as an apology.
Nodding, I cross the room to take a seat on the couch, watching as she sinks down on the one opposite me. She crosses her legs, her jaw feathering as those deep brown eyes stare daggers into me. Though it’s clear her stubbornness has full control, I still see the softness rounding her eyes, the pain she clings onto. In this moment, I feel the hurt she’s feeling. I know she hates me for what I did. I hate myself just as much. But there were so many factors going against Sera at the time that I couldn’t have protected her in the same way. I had to disappear.
Taking a deep breath, I steel my features and prepare myself to start, but Sera beats me to it.
“Why?” she asks, her voice breaking. “Why did you leave me?”
It suddenly grows hot, the tension in the room thickening instantly. I tug at the collar of my shirt, but it’s not like I have a tie or top button to loosen. “We really thought I could protect you better if I wasn’t…” I clear my throat, lifting my hands to make air quotes. “Alive.”
“So it was planned? You knew Luciano was coming after me that day and—”
“No! I didn’t know he was coming after you, I swear. I would have told you, I would have done better.”
“You died.” The finality of those two words stings.
“I was taken to the hospital. I was in a coma for two weeks and when I woke up, things had changed.”
“What things?” She raises a brow and shifts in her seat. Curiosity is clearly eating away at her, and as much as I want to tell her everything, I’m not so sure she’s ready for the full truth. “What things, Enzo?” she barks, her voice growing louder with impatience.
“When I woke up, my family had already been told I had passed away. You had been told I was dead.”
Sera clutches a hand to her mouth, unable to contain the gasp that escapes.
“After that, it was decided.”
“But who? Who decided that?” she demands. “Raf? Who told—” her eyes round with shock.
I can see the cogs turning in her head, practically hear the puzzle pieces slotting into place. And though I hate what the realization brings as it dawns on her as to who was responsible for this plan, she has to hear it.
“Your father.”
“No!” she gasps, shooting up from her spot to start pacing back and forth. “No! He wouldn’t do that to me. To you. To us!”
“Sera—” I reach for her, but she jolts away from me. “He thought I could protect you this way.”
“But you couldn’t!” She stops in front of me, fists clenched and nostrils flaring. “Levi took a beating because of your plan! I was taken, beaten and—”
“I know!” I croak. That part still hits me deep; Sera should have been safe. She had enough people to protect her and we all failed. Levi shouldn’t have taken that hit for something he couldn’t stop, but Alfredo Bianchi needed to take his anger out on someone, and my cousin was the first person to admit to him that Sera was taken. The only reason Alfredo didn’t kill my cousin was because he knew what Levi meant to Sera. Something he never recognized with me—or maybe he did and took advantage of that.
It doesn’t matter now. What’s done is done. My eyes drop to my lap, unable to meet Sera’s broken gaze. “I’m sorry,” I murmur.
The silence that follows my words pierces through me. I look up to see Sera’s features soften, my chest pinching when a tear slips free. I stand up to swipe it away, letting our history catch up with us.
She leans into my palm, eyes closing as another tear falls. “Why would my father do this?”
“Because he cares,” I answer. “He might not show it, but his intentions were always to keep you safe. My intentions were always to keep you safe.”
“But he forced you to fake your death, to leave me.”
I nod. There aren’t any words I can say to make this situation better, or offer her the answers that would make her hurt less. In fact, there’s nothing I can say except, “I’m so fucking sorry.”
A sob cracks through her chest. Before I can do anything, she’s swinging her arms around my neck and burying her face in my shirt. Her shoulders bounce as she finally lets her grief overwhelm her.
I collapse on the couch with her in my arms, curling her body into my lap, making sure not to hurt her ribs. I hold her for what feels like forever, but it’s still not long enough. I keep holding her until her body stills and her breaths fall steadily.
Three months.That’s how long I’ve been watching her attempting to move on after my death. These ten minutes of holding her isn’t enough, but at least it’s something—and I’m amazed that all it took to get here was a heartfelt apology.
I hate that her bodyguard was right.
“I was always there, watching you,” I say, holding her tightly. “It killed me not being there with you, dancing with you.”
Sera pulls her head away from me, brows furrowing.
“Greco’s wedding?” I supply, raising a brow. “The whole place was watching you.”
“You were there?” she rasps.
I nod, pulling her back to me. “I never wanted to lie to you, Sera. I only wanted to keep you safe.” It’s all I’ve ever wanted for her. I had accepted my fate as soon as Alfredo ordered it. Sera and I were never to meet; I was always to remain in the shadows, keeping an eye on our enemies while out of sight. My job was the same, only I was never to come face to face with my leader. My death being made public was what would protect her because if I wasn’t around, that meant one less person for the Verdis to track. I could work in the shadows to take them down and protect Sera.
I failed, though. I let the family down and I’ll forever owe that to them.
“I’ll never be safe, Enzo,” Sera sniffs. Her brown eyes are glassy, the torrent of her emotions catching up with her. She cups my face, locking her gaze with mine. “Promise you’ll never leave again.”
“I—”
“Promise!”
I close my eyes, drawing in a deep breath. I swore the day I finally faced Sera, I’d never lie to her. There would be no more secrets between us. Unfortunately, I can’t make this promise. I can’t lie and say that I’ll never leave her again because that’s an entity we all fear; the unknown. I can’t sit and tell no more secrets because there’s still so much she doesn’t know. It would break her to tell her, especially so soon after what she’s been through.
“I promise I’ll always protect you,” I whisper, pressing my forehead to hers. “I promise to be by your side until the end.”
Satisfied, she offers me a gentle smile. She reaches up to stroke my cheek, gaze honing in on the injuries I’ve sustained by Levi’s hand. He got some good shots in, I’ll give him that.
“You can’t keep fighting them, you know. They’re a part of this.”
“Both of them?” I question.
Sera pushes away from me with a huff, straightening up to smooth the creases in her jacket. “Levi, Luca and I have something. I don’t care what you think or what you have to say about it.”
“And Gio?”
She stares down at me, surprise feathering her jaw. “I made him a promise. There’s a little girl’s life in danger, and I promised I would save her.”
“You didn’t answer my question.” Though judging by the way she reacts to me pressing, I already know the answer. She might say she’s done with Giovanni, but I know my best friend too well. “What about the bodyguard?”
“I…” She drops her gaze to the ground. “I don’t know.”
I stand up and bring her against my chest once more. Everything we’ve been through seems to melt away. The pain, the grief, the resentment. I tilt her chin up to look at me, to see the sincerity on my face when I say, “Sei tutto per me.”
She rolls her eyes, a small smile lifting on those perfect lips. Lips that I’ve thought about touching, kissing; finally taking that step past friendship and into new territory. Leaning down, I start to close the distance between our mouths.
But at the last second, Sera lifts her hand and presses a finger to my lips. “Go make amends.”
I frown when she steps away, placing something in my palm. I look down to see a tooth; my tooth, and now I know I have to make things right with everyone. Even the guy who stole my girl.