Chapter 32
The silence is almost deafening. Aside from the regular beep of my sister’s heart rate monitor piercing the thick tension of the room, there’s no other sound. My knee bounces rhythmically as I nervously try to calm my erratic thoughts while staring at her still form. Her features are sunken, the ghostlike pallor of her face telling me how much she went through these past few months. And I did nothing to stop it.
She’s okay now, but for how long?
The doctors have said my sister is in a stable condition. They’ve been checking her vitals every couple of hours just to be on the safe side, because there’s no certainty. But that only leaves me guilt ridden because I should have protected her. I should have been there for her, been a better brother and prevented her from going within ten steps of Ronaldo Verdi. I knew from the moment she announced their engagement that it would be the end of her, but I did nothing. I should have tried a lot harder to prevent their marriage, but instead I walked her down that fucking aisle and gave her away to the monsters like she was property to be passed on.
Cazzo!
My fists clench at the thought of what he’s done to her. Luisa, the golden child of the Marchese family, is now nothing more than skin and bones lying in a hospital bed. You can barely see that she’s pregnant, the slightest bump protruding from her stomach. And from what the doctors have said, she should be five months pregnant, but the baby’s growth isn’t where it should be. The whole situation leaves me deflated and ashamed.
I don’t know how long I sit there, just watching her from afar like she’s a treasure to guard. It isn’t until my phone vibrates in my pocket that my attention is stolen away. I leave the room before Luisa can wake, closing her door with a soft click before leaning back against the wall with a sigh.
Alfredo Bianchi.The name flashes on my screen like a warning. I should heed it, but I know that I should talk to him sooner or later. Sera has been avoiding his calls for weeks now—not that I blame her—but the guy has all the best intentions when it comes to his daughter.
“Sir,” I sigh as I answer the call.
“Marchese.” His voice is cut with authority, the same authority Sera possesses. “We need to discuss Serafina.”
“Of course,” I nod with agreement, even though he can’t see me. I turn to peek through the window into Luisa’s room. She’s still asleep, her chest rising and falling so slightly that it’s almost undetectable.
“I’ve been updated on the Verdis and what happened. I’m sorry to hear about your sister. I was unaware of just how cruel that family could be.”
I shudder at his words. There’s no way he was unaware of what Luciano put Sera through ten years ago. Even I knew the extent of Luciano’s wrath when it came to our leader. He tortured her— mentally and emotionally—and when things turned physical, it was Enzo that took matters into his own hands. Unfortunately, he was unable to do anything other than threaten the man who thought laying hands on a woman was acceptable. It served a purpose for a short while, until Sera came into power.
“Now that Sera knows LaRosa is alive, I think it’s time to make amends.” He doesn’t need to tell me much more than that. From what he’s already said, I’m assuming Enzo has spoken to him and he’s fully aware that Sera knows what happened.
“I don’t think that’s up to me, sir.” I lean back against the wall again.
I’m too tired to have this conversation, but I know it’s my duty. Knowing Sera, she’ll point blank refuse until she’s ready. Nobody can force her to make her decisions, despite what her father believes.
But Alfredo disagrees. It’s evident with the way he continues like I haven’t just told him it’s impossible. “You’re her second in command, her confidant, her…” he doesn’t finish that sentence, which makes me smile.
Obviously, the idea of his daughter being involved with me and Luca rattles him, but I’m curious how he would react if he knew the full extent of our relationship. That she was also sharing a bed with Enzo, too.
“It’s her birthday next week,” he continues with a sigh, “and I would like to see her, to explain myself.”
“Is that a command or a request?” I challenge, exhaling loud enough for him to hear how reluctant I am to help.
“Please, Marchese. She’s my daughter, my only child. She’s been declining my calls, ignoring my messages. I just want to fix things.”
His words grate on my nerves. With the lack of sleep and overwhelming worry, I’m already a short fuse, ready to explode. I want to tell him he should have thought about that before hurting Sera in one of the worst possible ways, but as I turn around once more and lock eyes with my sister, I know what he’s not saying.
It’s the thought of losing her without apologizing. He doesn’t want to let her slip away before he’s able to explain himself. No matter what paths we take in life, regret will always follow us, reminding us of the actions we took to get to our destination; the actions we didn’t take. And I feel those sentiments far too deeply.
“I’ll see what I can do,” I answer sharply. “I can’t promise anything, but I’ll speak to her.”
“That’s all I can ask for.”
A few more words of confirmation are exchanged before I tell him I need to go. I don’t have the time to cater to his needs when my sister is lying in bed, so fragile that she might break at any point. I need to focus on repairing my own relationship with my family before convincing anyone else to do the same. I’d be the ultimate hypocrite if I didn’t atone for my mistakes.
As soon as I enter the room, Luisa shifts her position.
“You need to rest,” I remind her as I come to stand at the end of her bed.
“Don’t do that,” she frowns at me. “Don’t treat me like I’m made of glass, Levi.” Her tone is sharp and irritable, and I don’t know whether it’s intended for me.
My answer comes in the next breath when she tells me to stop hanging around the edges of the room like she’s contagious.
“I know what you’re doing,” she smirks, grabbing my hand. “None of this is your fault.”
I pull up the chair beside her bed and sink into it. “I should never have let this happen,” I croak. “Family protects family, and I failed.”
Luisa’s expression droops, sadness filling her eyes. Her fingers stroke over my hand, attempting to soothe my torrent of emotions, but no amount of consoling can really take away the guilt I feel.
“You didn’t fail me,” she smiles weakly. “I’m a big girl, Levi. I can make my own decisions, my own mistakes. As poor as it was, I made the decision to marry Ron—” she cuts herself off, averting her gaze to the window of her private room. “I’m not the little sister you had to protect when we were younger.”
“Lu, you will always be my little sister. I’m always going to want to protect you.” Even though I couldn’t do it this time. “I wish I could have done more.”
Luisa shakes her head, her lips widening slightly. It doesn’t feel like twenty four hours ago she was holed up in some room, being fed the bare minimum. I’ll never understand why the Verdis did that to her, to a pregnant woman who could be bearing the next heir.
“I love him,” she replies simply, then realizes her words and corrects herself. “Loved. Or at least I thought I did.”
“Well, that was your first mistake,” I grumble.
“No,” she sighs. “Loving him wasn’t a mistake. Thinking he loved me was.” Her free hand moves to her belly, idly stroking the tiny bump. Her gaze follows the movement, her smile lost on the baby growing inside of her. “At least something good will come out of this.”
“How so?” I frown.
“When the Verdis are gone, there’s going to be a new regime. This little one won’t be anything like those assholes.”
I can’t help but chuckle at her. The weight of our conversation has lifted. Even though she would never admit it, I still feel partially to blame. But she’s right; once the Verdis have been eliminated, a new regime will take place. “That day can’t come soon enough.”
Luisa nods slowly, understanding flowing between us, giving me a new fondness for my sister. I’m seeing her in a new light, a light that shows me she doesn’t care that her child will have no father after this. That’s a strength I admire, but then again, she already knows she’s not alone in this. Not if I can help it.
“So what have I missed?” she asks excitedly, wiggling her brows at me. “I saw you and Fontana.”
A deep chuckle releases from my chest, like Luca’s name can bury all the shitty emotions inside and make way for the better ones. The ones that bring a smile to my face and make my heart race.
“I think I love him,” I say quietly, though I’m not sure for whose benefit.
“You think?”
I shake my head affirmatively. Of course I don’t think. I know.
But taking that step to actually saying it is frightening. I came so close last night to telling him, but I chickened out because… fuck, I don’t even know why. It was the perfect time, the perfect moment and I bottled it. I’ve known Sera a hell of a lot longer and it doesn’t scare me half as much to admit what I feel for her as what I feel for Luca.
“Levi,” Luisa laughs, squeezing my hand. “You need to tell him.”
“I have!” I chew my lip. “Well, sort of.”
“Sort of?”
I shrug my response. Does saying it with your eyes count?
“Tell him, Levi. He deserves to know.”
“And what if he doesn’t feel the same way?” My nerves spike at the thought of Luca laughing at me as I declare my love for him. We’re not exactly known for talking through our emotions. We fuck each other until there’s nothing left to say, because our actions speak much more than actual words could.
Luisa groans, throwing her arm over her face. “How are guys so damn clueless?” She glances back at my dumbfounded expression. “I saw the way he looked at you, until he passed out on your shoulder,” she laughs. “He cares for you just as much as you do for him. He came for me. He wouldn’t leave without me! He did that for you, not for me. That’s love, Levi.”
Her words pierce the very depths of my soul. I know that what she’s saying is true, but that still doesn’t stop the lingering seeds of doubt from taking seed. I want nothing more than to bear my soul to him; to tell him he’s the only person who truly sees me. Sure, Sera has a piece of my heart—she always has. What I feel for her is unmatched against anything I could possibly compare it to. That alone is something I have to declare to Sera on my own terms—but Luca is the other half to every fiber of my being. In the small space of time we’ve been together, I’ve forgotten what it felt like to be without him—without both of them.
That’s the thought that scares me the most.