Chapter 61
Petra
I stopped breathing entirely. My heart tripped over itself and landed in my throat. Tears sprung to my eyes as Cal stopped in front of me, his dimples on full display with a smile that transcended realms.
“ What ?” I whispered as the first of my tears ran down my cheek.
“Where you go, I go, remember?”
I launched myself at him, my legs circling his hips as I pulled his mouth to mine, the sound of cheering and clapping sounding from the rest of the Saints behind us. “How?” I asked between kisses. “How? How are you here?”
I begrudgingly tore myself away as he slowly lowered me to my feet again.
He pulled Aegrabane from its sheath, the rubies pulsing rapidly in its hilt.
“Tyrak named me his heir years ago. I just didn’t know it.
And the Sanguilite couldn’t keep a Saint for her collection .
I told her maybe she should start collecting seashells instead.
She did not like that suggestion. I also brought you a gift.
” Cal shifted to reach into his pocket and produced a small vial, a tiny fragment of light inside I recognized as one of the thousands I’d seen in the Sanguilite’s Realm. “Your mother.”
Words evaded me as I stared between the vial and the man holding it. The kind, devoted, charming man whom I loved with every fiber of my soul.
“I’ll be happy to get this to the right place,” Onera said quietly, and all I could do was nod as Cal passed the vial to the Saint of Miracles.
My face was scrunched and my nose was running, but I didn’t care. I wailed into Cal’s chest, the happiest tears in existence flowing freely from my eyes.
There was a flutter in my chest, as if some distant, ever-present longing I didn’t know existed had been snipped away.
What was left in its wake was a calmness, a sense of steadiness that, in a past life, would have set me on edge as I waited for it to crack apart and fall to pieces.
But here… Here, that sense of calm had lodged itself so deep in my chest, I knew it belonged.
I knew I belonged.
Then my hands were on Cal’s face and I was kissing him again, content to lose myself in his touch. He was here. He was here and I was here and we were here together.
A throat cleared behind us and we pulled apart, awkwardly righting ourselves as Onera’s knowing smile greeted us. She stepped forward, and that was when I noticed the parchment in her hand. “This is a letter written by your mother, when she first fell pregnant with you.”
I blinked at the folded piece of parchment, staring at it as though it might disappear into a puff of smoke or crumble to dust should I touch it. “Thank you,” I murmured, taking the letter from her and holding it to my chest.
“Read it when you’re ready. ”
I nodded, gently tucking it into my pocket before a hand rested against my lower back. “How do you feel about a little trip to Heaven?” Cal murmured in my ear.
I raised a brow, a sly smirk pulling at my lips. “Is that a euphemism for something else?”
A deep chuckle came from his chest, the sound reverberating through me and settling comfortably in my bones. I’d never get used to the sound. “This time, no.” He laughed. “But once you get settled in, we can take that trip to Heaven, as well.”
I beamed up at him, squeezing his hand in mine. “Fair warning,” I started, my smile faltering for a moment. “Larka is going to yell at me for leaving. Maybe at you, too.”
“Even though it all worked out?”
“Even though it all worked out.”
“Well, I look forward to an eternity of being yelled at by your sister,” he said, his smile blinding and beautiful and brilliant. “As long as I’m by your side.”
My entire life was spent surviving, trying to get around the corner and into the clear. All of that running. All of that fighting. All of that suffering and anguish and torture was leading me to this.
And I was content to spend the rest of forever here in the Saints’ Realm.
I’d survived.
◆ ◆ ◆
When Cal and I had both been thoroughly reamed by Larka, thoroughly hugged by Da, and thoroughly squeezed, kissed, and fussed over by Arimara and Berna and a few more of Heaven’s newest residents, we returned to the Saints’ Realm, to the golden tower of Katia’s home.
It was mine now — as was Rhedros’ — and Cal and I wandered the rooms until every corner had been explored.
It didn’t feel real yet. I wasn’t sure it ever would.
“I’d like to go see Noros’ home,” Cal said as he pressed a kiss to my bare shoulder. We laid naked, side by side in one of the bedrooms of Katia’s home. “Want to join?”
“I think I’ll stay here for a bit,” I sighed contentedly, a smile pulling at my lips. “I know Onera told us Saints don’t need to sleep, but I feel like I could use a bit of rest.”
Cal placed another kiss against my forehead. “Understandable.” He rose, pulling his trousers up his legs and his tunic over his head. It was all so ordinary and yet…so much more. “I’ll be back in a little.”
“Take your time. We have a lot of it,” I hummed, watching as he disappeared through the doorway and around the corner. I heaved out a deep breath, sinking further into the blissfully soft mattress before I turned onto my side and fumbled for the nightstand.
The small book Tyrak had written for me had been sitting there since I arrived in the Saints’ Realm. I didn’t have the strength to read his words yet. One day I would. But today, I reached for the envelope beside the book, and pulled out the parchment waiting inside.
My dearest daughter,
One day, you may read this letter. I am writing it in the hopes you will never set eyes upon these words, that the universe will somehow keep you safe from a darkness that I once carried within my own heart.
But should the world fall apart, and should you slip through the cracks and find yourself in possession of this inconsequential piece of parchment, there are some things I wish for you to know.
You, my daughter, are a miracle of the purest kind, a light born of darkness. This world was designed to keep you from existing, and yet I feel you move within my belly.
You may believe you were created for a purpose, and you were.
That purpose, however, was not to put an end to suffering or carry the weight of humanity upon your shoulders.
Your purpose is love. You were created by a love so fierce it transcended realms, and I hope you know that kind of love your whole life.
I hope it fills every part of you until you feel you may burst. I hope you know the kindness of your father, and that you carry the same strength and resilience in your heart as he does.
I hope you feel the force of the Saints behind you and know the love each and every one of them carry for you.
My darling girl, if you’re reading these words, it means I have failed in my calling to protect you from darkness. For that, I am unforgivably sorry. But please know, you are my greatest triumph, my greatest honor, and my greatest act of good.
With all my love,
Your Mother