The Winner Takes All (Complete Collection)

23. Cold Turkey Rules

23

COLD TURKEY RULES

Luke

I’m like a dog. I run with my pack.

So it’s weird that I’m only half-excited to go out with the guys tonight to celebrate Jason’s wedding.

That evening in the hotel room as I button my shirt—a light blue one covered in tiny cartoonish footballs that my sister bought for me—I feel strangely antisocial.

As I appraise my reflection in the en suite mirror, I keep stealing glances at Tanner next to me. I just want to hole up in this room all night with him.

He’s slapping on aftershave. Sure, he’s hot as hell with a towel around his waist. But something else about the moment is messing with me, rearranging pathways in my brain, making me see the start of new connections.

With him.

But maybe this is only the side effect of being in close quarters with him and his cedar. Yeah, it’s wood. That has to be it.

When he’s done, I wiggle my brows and slide in for a hit. “Better get my fix now so I’m not hard all night at dinner,” I murmur against his neck.

He lifts his chin, giving me room to sniff him. “That work for you?”

Closing my eyes, I take another inhale. Yup it works on my dick all right. But it’s making my pulse speed up. Or is that my heart pounding too fast?

It’s a little uncomfortable, so I jerk away but paste on a smile. “I can behave now.”

I wait for him to say I dare you to , because, hello. What else would you say?

But instead, Tanner takes off the towel and turns away. “I should get dressed.”

Heading into the room, he grabs his clothes. He’d seemed more pensive than usual since we arrived. There was no time to dwell on the sudden roomie sitch after we checked in. Jason had arranged for a tee time, so we hit the links and played a round with the guys.

On the course, I tried not to think about the last time I lifted a golf club and how my buddy and I nearly set a mini golf cave on fire with our lust.

But that’s the story of these last few days. I’ve been trying not to think about him.

When Tanner took off for the All-Star game, I went wall to wall all day, running longer than usual in the mornings with Cruz, hitting the gym for afternoon workouts with some of the other Leopards, then having dinner with Mom and Lucy each night after barely catching my breath all day.

I could hardly stand being alone in my apartment, or in my head, so I kept myself busier than a colony of bees.

Now, with Nate and Hunter down one end of the hall, and Gunnar and Rafe down the other end, maybe being pensive is wise.

Tanner and I will have to be careful at dinner, like we talked about. We don’t want to let on. We don’t want to take away from the grooms. Is that why he’s a little distant? Because it’s necessary for our rules ?

Probably.

Maybe he needs to know I’m on board too.

Once he’s dressed, I rub my palms together, like a coach prepping a fighter for the ring. “All right. We can do this. I’m sending in the play for dinner. It’s called the No-Eye-Fucking route. That also means no dirty jokes, and no flirt-fucking either,” I say as Tanner grabs his phone from the nightstand.

“It’s a plan,” he says, but he sounds so far away that my chest squeezes with an unfamiliar ache.

Is this what it’s going to be like after Christmas?

I swallow past the weirdness I feel and ask, “Are we good?”

He snaps his gaze up from his phone, his brow knitting. “Why wouldn’t we be?”

I shake my head, confused. “I don’t know, Tanner. You seem off…”

For a few seconds, he’s starkly quiet, looking like he’s weighing what to say in his mind. But then he flashes me his winning grin. “Everything’s great. Let’s hit it,” he says, then swaggers his way toward the door, opening it first and striding down the hall like the sexy motherfucker he is.

As I watch him go, I tilt my head, briefly wondering what it would be like to have that sort of confidence and certainty.

The man knows what he wants in life.

And he damn well intends to get it.

Me? I’m just wanting too much. I’m wanting him and wanting football and wanting security and wanting friendship and wanting sex and wanting that damn early renewal.

I draw a breath and try to shove some of my want into a corner as I head to dinner.

At a nearby restaurant, we eat like kings. Or, more precisely, like kings whose nutritionists have taught them how to dine for power, speed, and resilience.

Kale and risotto. Seared salmon and sautéed veggies. Sweet potatoes and rotisserie chicken.

It’s a feast for guys who obsess over milliseconds and muscles, and the difference they can make in a close game.

Tomorrow is for family but tonight, Jason and Beck wanted a night out with close friends, and they’ve got that. Jason and his dude are seated next to Nate and his hubs, Hunter, on one side of a big round table in a private room. Tanner and I are between the other couples—Gunnar and his suave British beau, Rafe, and Zane and Maddox, the quieter of that pair.

I’m antsy to pull Maddox aside and ask how his meeting with the GM went this week. If he’s made any progress with the Leopards.

But it’s probably not the time or place. He’s here as a friend of the grooms, and I’m sure it’s tough to straddle the line between agent and buddy.

He’s not the only one straddling a line—I’m riding the fence between friendship and sex with Tanner.

And between champagne and temptation.

Who thought it would be a good idea to seat me next to Tanner? No clue but I’m trying valiantly not to let my knee touch his under the table.

When Tanner takes a bite of braised Brussels sprouts, leaving a dollop of sauce on the corner of his lips, I nudge him with my elbow.

He turns to me in question right as Nate clears his throat. “All right, let’s toast. To the next dudes to take the plunge,” Nate says, raising a glass of bubbly, his wedding band shiny under the soft light of the room.

Perfect cover. Turning toward Tanner, I tap the side of my mouth.

“Oh,” Tanner says quietly, then lifts his napkin and imitates me.

“To Jason and Beck. When Jason met this guy,” Nate continues, gesturing to Jason’s fiancé, “he didn’t know what to make of his rival.”

“Because Beck’s a better QB,” Zane cough-whispers.

“Shut your mouth,” Jason says, pointing at Zane with the hand that shows off his Super Bowl ring.

Beck clears his throat and lifts his glass, showing off his ring. “Got mine first,” he says dryly.

“I’ll get the next one first,” Jason says.

“We’ll see about that,” Beck retorts, and it’s damn cute how they thrive on competition.

“Anyway,” Nate continues, and I wait for him to rib the almost newlyweds again, “the struggle was real for Jaybird, but he listened to his heart, and so did Beck, and I could not be happier for these two.”

Wow. There was no ribbing. That was all heartfelt, and the drum in my chest beats louder. I’m so happy for my friends, finding their forever.

As we lift our glasses, I catch another glimpse of Tanner. He missed the sauce spot. After he drinks some champagne, then sets down the glass, I lean in to whisper, “Still there, baby.”

He tenses, but then his lips twitch in a hint of a grin.

He lifts the napkin once more, but I take it from him and dab the corner of his lips.

“Thanks,” he says, barely audible.

When I hand him the napkin and look up, Jason’s staring at me, then at Tanner. Questions flash in his eyes.

Oh, shit.

Did everyone see that? Did I break our rules to behave like cold turkeys?

But it’s only Jason watching. Everyone else is chatting, going on about their business.

I breathe a little easier as Zane remarks about the innkeeper being a friend, then Gunnar comments on how much he digs the amenities at the B&B, then Beck chimes in with, “I’m glad we found a place just for friends tonight.” Apologetically, he meets Tanner’s gaze. “But I’m sorry there weren’t enough rooms.”

“It’s no big deal,” Tanner says evenly.

“Yeah, we’re cool,” I add.

S ee? Look at that, Tanner. I can do the friends thing, no problem. I’m not breaking the cold turkey rules.

“And the hot tub at the inn is nice ,” Jason adds, his eyes twinkling.

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Nate asks.

“Fortunately, I can’t read your mind,” Jason deadpans, “or we’d all know about the last time you did something in a hot tub.”

“Gentlemen,” Gunnar cuts in with his raspy voice. “Sounds like a game of never have I ever is in order. Don’t worry. I’ll start the fun.” He clears his throat theatrically. “Never have I ever sucked a dick.”

Everyone snorts and takes a drink.

“And this is when it’s great to get a participation trophy,” I say.

Tanner laughs.

“Never have I ever taken a dick,” Gunnar adds, then guzzles.

Next to him, Rafe just chuckles, but doesn’t drink. Gunnar leans into his dude and smacks a loud kiss to his cheek. “I know, you toppy mofo. I know,” he says, as everyone else drinks.

Gunnar lifts his glass again, apparently unstoppable. “Never have I ever eaten ass.”

Everyone raises a glass. Everyone drinks. I sneak a peek at Tanner, imagining that mouth and those lips and that tongue going places I hardly let anyone go with mouths, lips, and tongues.

I’m also thinking about why I want him to.

And I’m thinking about what it means that I want to have sex with him in ways I haven’t with other guys.

My heart thuds, and for the first time I think I know the answer. It’s been hazy for a few days, but the fog is starting to clear.

Trouble is, we don’t have much time alone. Jason has demanded our presence at the hot tub for an after-dinner party. Once we return to the inn, we’ve only got fifteen minutes in the room to grab bathing suits and towels before we head to the deck.

The second the door to the room snaps shut, I turn to Tanner. “I trust you,” I blurt out.

He smiles, a little crooked, his expression saying go on . “I trust you too.”

“That’s why I’ve asked you to do things in bed that I don’t do a lot,” I continue, pacing the room, dragging my hands through my hair.

“Good,” he says. “I’m glad.”

His voice is tinged with hope. I don’t know what to make of that new sound. But I feel antsy to share. I’m compelled to tell him what’s on my mind and in my heart.

“And there are other things I want to do. That I haven’t tried,” I say, feeling utterly vulnerable, so I keep moving.

But he comes up to me, sets his reassuring hands on my shoulders and stops me in my tracks. “Like what?”

“I’m kind of basic in bed. What I’ve done. You know, the usual. Hand jobs, blow jobs, anal.”

“Sure,” he says, nodding, clearly eager for me to keep going.

“But with you, sex just feels like…this new world.”

He smiles like the windows are opening in the morning and sunshine is steaming in. “Yeah. It’s pretty fucking good.”

“Like I said in New York, I can tell you what I want. And,” I say, shuddering out a nervous breath, “I can be myself with you.”

Wow. That’s it. There it is. Tanner is the one person I feel like I can truly be my complete self with. In and out of bed.

“You can, Luke. You really can.” Where he was quiet during dinner, now he’s eager to talk. Or really, to listen.

I feel unburdened and it’s fantastic. “In the past, I felt like I had to be this…big athlete stud. But with you, I can let go. Ask for other things,” I say, then close my eyes, take a breath, open them.

“Like what, Remy?”

I gulp, then offer up more of myself. “Not tonight, not here, but maybe when we’re alone again at home I want you to—” I stop, because I’ve never asked a guy to do this to me before. “I want you to eat my ass and make me come like that.”

“Oh, fuck,” Tanner says in a low, dirty rumble. His whole body is shaking. He grabs my face, holds me tight. “I want to do everything with you. I want to make you feel so fucking good.”

His response is a dream. I relax into his touch. “I’ve never asked someone for that before. I mean, I’ve had it done, but like for a minute here or there. Never to the point where I come.”

Tanner presses a possessive kiss to my mouth, then slides his tongue past my lips, flicking it, lighting up my fantasies. “Like that?” he asks when he breaks the kiss

I can’t speak. Just nod as I shudder.

His smile is slow and wicked. “I want to fuck you with my tongue,” he says, sliding a hand around to cup my ass. “Tell me what else you want.”

My mind is overheating. It’s like a circuit board buzzing, wires frying and snapping. “Toys, flip fucking, edging,” I say and it’s a relief to share my nighttime fantasies. “I know that’s not super kinky. I just want to do all these things. With you . I don’t want to with anyone else. And I really don’t want any other guys touching you. Like that guy your sister wants you to meet.”

“He came to the All-Star game with Amelia.”

I growl. Like a dragon.

Tanner presses his forehead to mine. “All I could think about was you.”

“Good,” I bite out.

He pulls back to meet my eyes. “I don’t want anyone else. I want you, Luke. And I could give you everything you want if you’d let me,” he says, so strong and commanding.

I wrap my hands around his hips. “God, I just want to stay here with you tonight. In this room and never leave.”

“I know.”

“But we have to go out there soon,” I say, then glance at the clock. We ate and drank for a long time. It’s after midnight. “But first I want to say thank you with my mouth on your dick.”

“Let me just say you’re welcome in advance,” he says.

I take him to the bed, shove him onto it, and remove his slacks and boxer briefs.

Tanner offers me his hard, leaking dick, and I tremble as I stare at it. I feel feverish. Hungry too, but like I can’t get enough to eat. Like even if I have him now, I’ll want to do this to him every night if I can.

I kneel on the floor and I try to tell him that as I press gentle kisses along his erection. I lavish more kisses along his cock, open-mouthed caresses till he’s panting and curling his hands tighter in my hair. “Luke,” he breathes out.

“Yeah, baby?” I ask, rubbing my face against his cock like a cat marking him.

“I love… this ,” he says.

I look up to meet his gaze. His eyes hold mine in a new way, full of tenderness and true affection that goes beyond friendship.

It’s overwhelming and terrifying, everything that’s happening, so I focus on the one thing I can’t fuck up. I worship his dick with my mouth, covering his cock with my lips and my tongue.

Drawing him deep, I run my fingers up his thighs to his stomach, reaching for him, needing to touch him. He grabs my hands, clasps them tight with his as I show him how much I adore him.

When he speaks again, it’s a low warning as he says my name. Only it’s not Luke. It’s the nickname I’ve grown so damn fond of. “Remy,” he rumbles out, his body shaking, his release flooding my throat, his hands holding my head.

When I let go, he’s breathing hard, like he’s lost in a trance. He opens his eyes and meets mine. “Hey.”

I smile too. “Hey.”

I don’t know if we just agreed to something. But I want to find a way to have him and everything else I need too.

But there’s a knock on the door, then a loud voice, booming, “Get your lazy asses down to the hot tub.”

It’s Gunnar, and I jump up, quickly running a hand through my hair even though he can’t see through the solid wood door. Obviously. “Be right there,” I call out.

“Tanner, stop sucking off Luke. Move it, move it,” Gunnar says, then his footsteps fade as he walks away.

Tanner stares at me with wide eyes. “Shit. Does he know?”

“Well, he did get it kind of wrong,” I say, smugly.

I’m not sure I care much longer if they know. But I’m not the only one in this. So it’s best to have a plan. “Let’s join them for a while, then how about I pull off one of my spectacular yawns first and then you can follow me back to the room a little later?”

“You’re on, Remington.”

Remington, Remy, Luke. Whatever he calls me, I want to hear it.

Tonight, I’ll tell him I don’t want him to go to his brother’s wedding with that other guy. Since he’d better take me.