& Then They Loved (Ampersand Love #3)

43. Sunset

43

Sunset

Vera

V era didn’t think she’d feel this way again.

Once she’d stopped fighting with herself to give Vihaan another chance, her mornings were brighter, her days more fulfilling, and her nights spent in a haze of lust with a husband who fucked her like he had a point to prove before making love to her like she was the entirety of his soul. But in the fortnight since she’d dropped the wall between them, she felt surrounded by a feeling she hadn’t felt in a long time.

Belonging.

She looked beside her at Nanaji who was quietly humming to himself as he inspected the little blue bottle of coconut oil he’d requested she bring him.

“Beta,” he called after a moment, patting his knee like he used to even when she was a school-going child. With an indulgent smile, she plonked on the grass beside his chair and leaned over to place the side of her forehead on his lap .

“Y-you s-should put oil. Your N-nani used to massage y-y-you when you were a baby, b-but now, your hair is g-g-getting dry.”

“I’ll be more diligent, Nanu,” she obediently replied, sighing in happiness when she felt his shaky fingers massage oil into her scalp. It was a good day today. Nanu had been in better spirits after a tough few days of being in the doldrums, and he’d not had a lapse in his memory so far. Add to that, he’d seemed to be in a mood to recall old stories and relay them to Vera, making her laugh as he shared anecdotes about her childhood and her legendary stubbornness.

Vihaan had coerced her into taking some time off work, now that she was no longer at the mercy of tight finances. Still, she’d argued against taking advantage of her position as his wife, but he’d overruled her qualms. She was so thankful to him for that. The last few weeks had given her time with her grandfather in a way she’d longed for, for years, and she suspected it was precisely why Vihaan had insisted on this break for her. He seemed to know what she needed even if she didn’t know how to acknowledge it.

“A-are you happy n-now, my child?”

Vera hummed in response, eyes closed as the scent of the coconut oil mingled with the fresh grass around her.

“Y-you seem h-ha-happier. You always to-took on more r-res-responsibility than was yours, st-stubbornly insisting on putting m-more p-pr-pressure on yourself than n-necessary.”

“I’m not that bad.”

Nanu’s rough chuckle brought a smile to her face as well.

“You’re my m-most p-precious child, Vera. M-my greatest g-gift. S-seeing you h-happy brings me p-p-peace.”

The tremor of emotion in his voice had Vera twisting her neck to look up at her grandfather. Old eyes, tired with age but brimming with love stared back at her.

“L-little M-master t-treats you well, d-doesn’t he?” Ambernath asked.

“Like I’m a princess," she replied softly .

Her confirmation had Nanu grinning wide. “He’s st-stubborn. L-like you.”

“He is.” She nodded. “Very.”

“He l-loves you.”

“He does,” she accepted with a fond smile. “Immensely.”

“And y-you love h-him.”

She did. Even if she’d never said the words out loud, she knew that she’d slowly and surely fallen in love with Vihaan once more.

“I. . . Nanu. . .” She sighed. “Is it ok if I’m scared to love him? With everything that happened before. . .”

“Y-you care for him—it is c-c-clear. B-but if y-you let f-fear win, you are n-not living the life y-you s-should be living. My Vera is n-not one who c-cowers. She conquers.”

Vera glanced at him, feeling so very loved when Nanu ran a tremulous hand over her forehead, smearing the remnant oil on his palm across her face by mistake. She laughed at his sheepish look, rising up to wrap her arms around his neck, hugging him like she used to when she was a young girl.

“I love you, Nanu. You’re my most favourite person in the entire universe, you know?”

“S-silly girl,” Ambernath mumbled, affectionately patting her back as best he could. “Y-you a-are always m-my f-favourite.”

It was late into the afternoon when Ambernath finally sighed, looking a little worn.

“Ready for a little lie-down?” Vera asked, pushing his wheelchair towards his bedroom. As they settled him into bed, Ambernath held her hand. “R-r-remember to l-let yourself l-live, beta. You a-are s-st-stronger than y-you know.”

“I will, Nanu.”

Vera pressed a kiss onto the sunken hollow of his cheek, promising him the same thing she’d been trying to work up her nerve to. She stepped out into the hallway, a small smile on her face. Nanu always believed that she could do anything she set her mind to. But how did one control their emotions with their mind? If that were true, she’d have forgotten Vihaan over the years they’d been apart. Simply a few months in his company proven that wrong. To leave behind the pain of the past and old grievances was scary enough, especially since they’d been her crutch for so long. To open herself up and admit out loud that she loved Vihaan was terrifying.

“There you are.”

She looked up, startled to see the object of her thoughts walking towards her. She took a moment to appreciate what a handsome man he was, his long pant clad legs covering the distance between them with ease. His navy suit stretched taut across his impressive chest, his biceps flexing as he reached for the single button that held his coat together, releasing it with one hand in a move that felt like open seduction. She stared, until she realised what a fright she must seem—oily hair, pants muddied from kneeling in the grass—while he looked like he’d emerged from the pages of a magazine.

Embarrassed, she tucked a clumpy strand of hair back.

“I. . . What. . .”

Her words made no impact in slowing him down. He came right up to her but instead of stopping, his hands slid past her jaw, fingers spearing the hair at her nape. He tilted her head and before she could get a sound out, his lips were on hers.

She couldn’t hold back a soft moan when his tongue swept into her mouth, taking possession of her with an authority that made her body hum. His unabashed need for her, his clear and utter lack of awareness for anything or anyone else if she was in the room, made her feel so powerful, drunk on the knowledge that she held such sway over another. Over him. Her husband.

“Hi, Princess,” he husked, pecking the side of her lip before raising his head.

“Hi, Charming. ”

It had been some time since she’d called him that and the smile that lit up his face told her that it had been the exact right thing to say.

“You’re home early.”

“Hmm,” he nuzzled his nose against hers, bumping her cheek sweetly. “You look nice.”

“I have a litre of coconut oil in my hair.”

“Still look nice.”

“You’re so full of it,” she snorted, her words holding no bite. “Now really, why are you home early?”

“Missed you.”

He dropped another quick kiss on her mouth, shutting her up before she could say anything sassy.

“Where’s Nanaji?” he asked, drawing away just as she started to feel dizzy. Phew, she still wasn’t used to how he kissed her. Like he’d never get to do it again, so he had to make the most of it every single time.

“Just settling in for a nap.”

“Oh, I’ll go say hi before he dozes off. Maybe he’d like to go to the new gardens today for sunset. He liked the beach yesterday.”

Vera nodded with a smile, lacing her fingers with his as she led him into Nanaji’s room. She found it sweet that Vihaan found ways to involve himself with Nanu’s caretaking. More and more, she was learning to rely on him and finding that it had gotten easier to accept the help he so generously offered.

She knocked on the door once, pushing it ajar, her brows knitting when her grandfather looked to be asleep already.

She’d left mere minutes ago. Had he been that tired?

“Nanu?”

The silence felt eerie, a harbinger of something sinister. Not only did her grandfather not respond, but he also barely moved to acknowledge her calls .

She stepped closer, her blood draining when she noticed the unnatural stillness in his chest, the awkward position of his head and arm. As if he’d been getting ready to sleep comfortably, but had not been given the opportunity to fully settle in.

Ice spread across her skin, freezing her as terror seized her mind. Dropping Vihaan’s hand, she stumbled to Nanaji’s bedside, barely holding back from falling to her knees.

“N-Nanu?” she croaked, her hand hovering over his face, petrified of touching him and confirming what her mind knew but her heart rejected. “Vihaan is here to meet you. Nanu?”

Her breathing came out in loud, broken rasps, her vision blurring as she cradled her grandfather’s face between her trembling hands.

“Please wake up.”

Hot drops fell from her eyes onto his cheek, drawing no reaction from the man lying prone on his bed. She stared, reality settling into her bones with a weight of an anchor ready to drown her in pain. With a shuddering gasp, Vera crumbled atop him, her cheek pressed against his still warm chest.

“Don’t leave. Don’t leave me alone,” she whispered, her heart breaking when instead of the steady thud of a heartbeat beneath her ear, there was only the hollow sound of emptiness. A pool of silent tears dampened the cloth under her cheek as she choked back a sob, clutching her grandfather harder when she felt someone touch her back. Like a fearful pup afraid of leaving the only shelter she’d known, she climbed onto the side of her bed, hugging the man who’d loved her when no one else had.

She couldn’t let him go. She wasn’t ready. He was just talking to her. He was just here. “How am I supposed to live without you? Don’t go.” She buried her nose into his chest, desperately breathing in his scent before it faded.

She clung to her grandfather like the scared child she’d been when he’d dropped her off at the fancy school with the people who didn’t like her oily braided hair or her hand-me-down uniforms .

“Don’t go,” she whimpered, knowing that no amount of begging will allow her Nanu to hold her hand through the pain ravaging her. “Please. I have no one else but you.”