Epilogue
JAKE
TWO MONTHS LATER
“What do you think about spending Christmas in Scotland this year?” my sister asked, smiling down at her five-week-old daughter, Amelia, bundled in her arms.
My niece.
I snapped another photo, mind blown.
I had a niece now.
And a son.
I still couldn’t believe how much things had changed.
Talia hadn’t moved from my parents’ sofa since the moment she arrived for Sunday lunch, and the living room was a scattered mess of spare baby clothes, nappies, the car seat, muslin cloths and, weirdly, a sandwich bag full of pretzels.
“I’m breastfeeding, Jacob,” she’d told me earlier. “I need calories.”
I hadn’t argued. Food needed no explanation.
With our photoshoot finished, I perched on the arm of the sofa and gently bopped Amelia’s nose, then ran a finger across her little eyebrows, dark like her dad’s. Seemed like the run of Johnson blondes was about to end, but I wasn’t mad about it.
“I don’t care where I am.” As long as I had Ellie and Noah, and a shit load of roast potatoes, I was fine no matter what. “I’d have to ask Ellie though. We started buying Noah’s presents, but we haven’t discussed what’s happening on the day.”
I couldn’t wait to see Noah’s face on Christmas morning. He’d already started talking about Santa now that the shops were full of festive displays, and I found myself looking forward to the day instead of it being another excuse to eat, sleep and drink.
“Well, Rafe wants to spend Christmas at the cottage to celebrate our anniversary,” Talia explained.
They’d only married in January so it was too early for—
“Your sex anniversary,” I teased once it clicked. “Sexiversary?”
Talia refused to look at me, but I was finely attuned to an eye-rolling, my own sixth sense. I didn’t have to see it to know it had happened.
“Trust you to think about that.”
“In this case, it’s a curse.”
“Anyway,” she said, laughing. “Rafe figured Mum wouldn’t want to be away from Amelia for her first Christmas.”
It made sense. “Can you imagine her face if you told her you were taking her first grandchild away during her favourite time of year?”
We shared a look at the imaginable horror. It didn’t bear thinking about.
“Exactly my point. I don’t need the hassle, but I still want my space, so we had the idea of renting a big place in town for you all to stay. That way we’d be together, but we’re not stuck with each other all the time. What do you think?”
“I’m up for it, but I don’t know how Ellie would feel spending time with our whole family for days straight. No offence, but you guys are a lot.”
“Oh, we’re a lot?” Talia shook her head, amused. “Well, if that’s the case, we’ll rent a separate place for you three. I’d really love it if we could all be together as a family. It’s not just Amelia’s first Christmas, it’s your—our—first Christmas with Noah. It’s special.”
“Fuck.” I hadn’t thought of it like that. “You’re right. Let me get back to you.”
“Okay, good. And don’t say fuck around my baby.”
“As if she understands.”
“Yes, she does. She’s a genius.” Talia paused in stroking Amelia’s chubby cheeks. “Oh my god, I’m one of those mums.”
“Of course you are.” I squeezed her shoulders while we both smiled down at the tiny new addition to our family, so innocent and brand new, and pretty damn cute, and I wasn’t someone who thought of babies as cute. “Are you ever gonna let me hold her?”
“No,” she murmured, squishing Amelia tighter. “I don’t think I am.”
“You said I’d get my turn.”
“I didn’t specify when though.”
“You’re so annoying.”
“I never thought I’d see the day when you want to hold a baby. Who are you?”
“It’s not a random baby though, it’s my niece, which is different. I want to introduce her to Noah. He’s excited.”
“That’s so sweet.” She dropped a kiss to Amelia’s forehead, sniffling. “I’m not crying, my hormones are still all over the place.”
“Sure, you’re not. Give her to me.”
“Fine.” Talia reluctantly slotted my niece into my waiting arms. “Support her head, and cradle her bum. Just be careful. Watch where you’re going. No sudden moves. Don’t do anything stupid.”
“I got it.” It was awkward at first. Holding babies wasn’t something that came naturally to me. Plus, she was a chunky thing, a lot heavier than the first time I’d held her weeks ago, but I made sure my hold was solid before slowly backing from the room. “Stop harassing me.”
“Jake, I mean it.”
“Bye!”
Laughing, I moved quickly and carefully into the kitchen where Ellie and my mum were deep in conversation preparing dinner, and Noah was colouring at the island.
“Look who I stole.”
Mum glanced up from chopping carrots, and beamed. “There she is. Let me see her.”
“No. You had your turn earlier.”
“Excuse me?”
Ignoring her glare, I headed straight for Noah, nudging the adjacent stool closer before slowly lowering myself by his side. “Hey. Come meet Amelia. She wants to say hello.”
“No, she doesn’t.” Noah dropped his pencil and shifted onto his knees to lean over and get a better look, his little hand propped on my shoulder for balance. “Babies can’t talk.”
“Okay, maybe not, but she definitely wants to meet you.”
“How can you tell?”
“Because you’re cousins. Family. You’re the next generation, so when you’re older you’re gonna have each other’s backs, no matter what.”
“Oh, Jacob,” Mum cooed. “That’s so sweet.”
I rolled my eyes, but found Ellie watching me with the same schmoopy expression that decorated her face whenever me and Noah were together. She thought she concealed it, but I saw everything when it came to Ellie Brooks. Everything.
“What’s that look for?” I asked.
“Nothing. You just…”
My grin widened in slow understanding. “You think I look good holding this baby, don’t you?”
“Shut up,” she muttered, her cheeks turning pink.
My favourite colour these days.
Noah gently touched Amelia’s head, snatching his hand away when her face scrunched. “What’s she doing? Did I hurt her?”
“No.” Ellie gave him a reassuring squeeze. “Babies are wriggly when they’re small. The world is all so new to her and she’s getting used to her own body. You did that when you were a baby. You didn’t stop wriggling for weeks.”
“Also, I think…” My entire face wrinkled at the sensation beneath my hand. “Yep. She’s definitely taking a shit.”
“Ew!” Noah screeched, holding his nose as the foul stench rose between us.
“How can something so small smell that bad?”
I gagged, ready to march into the living room to hand her back, when Rafe appeared in the doorway looking confused by the sight of Ellie and my mum barely containing their laughter, and Noah wailing “Ewwwwww!” like it was the worst thing he’d ever smelled in his entire life, which, considering he was only five, was entirely possible.
“I’ve been sent to collect my daughter,” Rafe said slowly, like he wasn’t sure what the hell he’d walked in on.
“I’ve barely had her five minutes.”
“For my wife, that’s four minutes too long. Sorry, man.”
I made a big show of sighing as I handed her over. “She just had a massive dump anyway.”
Rafe closed his eyes, nodding like of fucking course. “Thanks for that.”
“You’re welcome.” I grinned, patting his back. “Have fun.”
“Oh, sure. Fun.” Rafe pressed a kiss to Amelia’s cheek. “Come on, smelly. Let’s get you changed.”
“Babies stink,” Noah roared, flapping the air around us in hopes of dispersing the smell. “I can taste it in my mouth!”
Mum and Ellie laughed harder.
“I was gonna ask for a baby brother or sister for Christmas, but I don’t want one that smells bad.”
My eyes nearly bugged out of my head.
Excuse me?
I risked a glance at Ellie, relieved to find a similar expression of what the fuck where did that come from? We hadn’t had that particular talk yet, and I wasn’t remotely ready for it either, but it was reassuring to know Ellie felt the same.
“Uh good,” she said. “No babies for Christmas ever. You can’t ask Santa for things like that.”
“Why not?”
“That’s out of Santa’s control. Trust me. Santa is for toys only, not humans, okay?”
Noah shrugged and went back to colouring.
I sagged in relief, then caught the smug delight lingering in my mother’s gaze as she watched the three of us together.
“Don’t say a word,” I told her.
She held up both hands in protest of her innocence, struggling to contain her smile, but stayed silent. Thank god. I knew my parents’ questions about marriage and babies were inevitable, but I was not standing for it so soon, and definitely not before I’d spoken to Ellie about it.
Not that I felt the need to, necessarily. Ellie hated being an only child so it was obvious she wanted a sibling for Noah at some point, but she also had big career plans now that he was settled in school.
I also had my own plans to take the two of them travelling during the school holidays, show them the world whenever we had the chance. Marriage wouldn’t change any of those things, but a baby so soon would definitely put a spanner in the works, so to speak.
Either way, we were a family no matter what, and that was all that mattered. Fuck everyone else’s expectations.
A lot had changed this year but not that.
Ellie drifted closer, tucking herself under my arm as if she knew I needed the calm of our connection. Just the feel of her body settled any agitation bristling inside me.
She peered at me with those beautiful kind eyes that I loved before I realised what that meant in the truest sense of the word, and pressed up on tiptoe to kiss the edge of my jaw.
“Do you remember what Noah said a few months back, that he liked the days when it was just the three of us?”
“I remember.”
“I like that too,” she whispered. “For now, at least.”
I fucking love this woman.
There was no hiding my grin as I grabbed handfuls of her ass and lifted her closer, rubbing her nose with my own. “Me too.”
Resisting the lure of her mouth was futile, especially when the warmth of her breath interlaced with mine. I was a weak, weak man when it came to the taste of those lips.