14. Cade
Cade
Well fuck. Now what do I do? I stare at the door and let Ellis’s words cut through me over and over again, burning and slicing like a knife heated over a flame.
“I think we should seriously consider this,” Sterling says quietly.
“Are you fucking serious?” Kai snaps. “You want to let your mate release footage of her being raped by her ex?”
Sterling sighs. “Of course I don’t want her to do it. It makes me want to rage and destroy things. But she’s right. Ellis is her own person. She can make decisions for herself and we need to be able to respect that.”
“Sterling’s right,” I mumble, still staring at the door. “Ellis will always need her freedom. We can’t clip her wings and keep her caged no matter how much we may want to. She’ll grow to hate us if we do.”
Kai laughs but it's lacking in humor. “You agree? Don’t you guys realize what this will do to her?”
“Maybe,” Sterling says. “But maybe not. We shouldn’t discredit her without giving her a chance. She’s proven how strong she is. And for Cade? For any of us? That girl would walk through fire and come out on the other side smiling.”
She would. And knowing her, it will only make her even stronger. I have to let her do this. No matter how much I hate it. No matter how much I’ll end up blaming myself for any pain she has to go through. If I don’t let her, something will break within her—between us—that we’ll never be able to repair.
I release a breath, shoulders slumping in defeat, and step out into the night. She’s standing barefoot in the grass, arms wrapped around her middle, staring up at the stars. Even from here I can see her shivering. Stubborn woman. I cross the yard and wrap my arms around her, pulling her back against my chest. Her skin is chilled, and I do my best to warm it with my own body.
My magic surfaces on its own, weaving through her hair and caressing her bare arms in faint warmth. She holds herself stiff at first, then relaxes, letting her head rest against my shoulder. I can’t help but smile, knowing I’ll always have this. No matter what’s happening between us, I’ll always have her.
I place a kiss on her temple, lingering for a few seconds just to inhale her scent. “I’m sorry, love. I hope you know I never intentionally made you feel that way.” She says nothing, but nods her head. “I didn’t realize that’s what I was doing, but I see it now. And I’m so sorry. I never want you to feel like you’re just an object. Nothing could be further from the truth.”
She turns in my arms, buries her face in my t-shirt, and I hold her a little tighter, hoping I can convey just how sorry I am. “I know you guys don’t mean to do it.” Her words are muffled, swallowed up by the fabric of my shirt. “I just wish you would take a few seconds to collect yourselves before you act. You didn’t even give my idea any thought before shooting it down. All because of how you felt about it.”
“Yeah. You’re right.” I pull back far enough to look in her eyes. It breaks my heart to see them so sad. “I need to do better. This is still so new for all of us, and we’re all still learning. That’s no excuse, I know, but …” I trail off and shrug.
“Thank you for realizing it,” she whispers before snuggling against me again.
I wish I could let her stay like that, but I need to be looking at her for what I have to say next. Pushing her away gently, I tilt her head up with my thumbs under her chin. “I don’t like this idea of yours. I don’t agree with it. But we can do it. As long as we talk it through and have a solid plan.”
Her amber eyes light up, and how she can be so excited for this to happen is beyond me. “Thank you.”
“Let’s go inside and warm up. We have a lot to talk about.”
She nods and threads our fingers together before heading back inside. Kai looks grumpy, arms crossed over his chest and brows drawn down over his gray eyes. Eyes that have the barest ring of red around the iris. This isn’t going to be easy on him. Instead of taking a seat, I grab a bottle of blood bourbon and a bottle of regular bourbon from the kitchen and bring them back to the living room. Kai snags the bottle from me and twists the top off with quick bursts of aggressive movement. I open mine much more calmly and offer it to Sterling first.
“I think there are a couple holes in this plan we need to solve before any of us agree to it.” Even though we’ve all caved and know this is going to happen, whether we like it or not. “The biggest issue I see with this is that it doesn’t impact Thomas at all.”
“Cade’s right,” Sterling says, handing me the bottle of bourbon. “There is no proof he was aware of what was happening.”
Ellis slumps on the couch, and grabs the bourbon from me. “So this idea was pointless afterall,” she mumbles. My lips twitch as she takes a big swallow and grimaces, spluttering the entire time the liquid slides down her throat.
“Not pointless,” I say, snagging the bottle back. “We just have to find a different angle.”
“We need to make it look like Kennedy released the video,” Kai grumbles. “Fuck, why am I offering advice when I don’t want this to happen.”
Sterling sits up. “What do you mean?”
Kai sighs and rubs his eyes, taking a large swallow of his bourbon. The red around his irises looks a little more pronounced, like he’s fighting to keep the monster in check. “We tell Kennedy he has to free Cade’s mom and sister. If he doesn’t, we’ll release the video and make it look like he released it. Besides Ellis, the only other person impacted would be Sam. I can’t imagine he’d be thrilled with the public seeing that side of him.”
“He’d go after Kenndy so fast,” Sterling agrees. “That would work. Can you make that happen?” he asks, looking at me.
I nod. “Yeah, I can hack into his email and send it from his account. But all this depends on if I can even get access to the footage.”
“Ellis,” Sterling says firmly, waiting for her to look at him. “I need to make sure you understand. If Kennedy doesn’t agree to our demand, we have to release the video. If we don't, it will discredit us in the future if we need something else from him.”
Ellis takes a deep breath and nods. “Yeah, I understand. I’m prepared for the video to be released.” Even though her shoulders are pulled back and her back is straight, she grabs the bourbon from me and takes another large gulp.
Sterling studies her for a moment before nodding. “And if we release the footage and Sam finds out it was us, he won’t hesitate to take revenge on you. Including killing your sister.”
Her face pales, and her grip on the bourbon bottle tightens until her knuckles are white. “I understand,” she breathes.
“Do you really?” His icy blue gaze pierces her. “Because the consequences of going through with this are pretty big. And they all impact you. Are you absolutely sure you want to do this?”
“Yes. I want to do this,” she says confidently.
I release a breath and push up from the couch. “Okay. Let’s see if I can access the footage.”
Three hours and two bottles of bourbon later, I have the footage downloaded to a thumb drive. Ellis is sitting on the swing on the porch, talking to Allie on the phone. And thank goodness. I did my best to keep the footage from playing too much, and I tried my hardest to not watch it. But fuck. I saw enough, and I’ve never been so keyed up before.
By Kai’s stillness, I know he saw some of it, too. I close the laptop and risk a glance in his direction. Ruby red eyes stare at the back of Ellis’s head, and while pissed doesn’t begin to describe his expression, he also looks heartbroken at the same time. A volatile mixture of emotions I feel as well.
I push up from the couch and run my hands through my hair. Anxious energy courses through me, leaving me jittery and unable to sit still. I can’t keep my gaze from traveling to my soul-bonded. Even through the closed window, the occasional laugh filters through. How she survived so long with that fucking piece of shit bastard, I’ll never know. And to think that after everything she survived she even wants our touch is a wonder in itself.
Her curly brown hair is in its usual messy bun on top of her head. Stray curls have escaped, wild and untamed. A lioness. That’s what she is. Courageous even in the face of her fears. Fiercely protective of those she loves. Possessing a strength I will never be able to comprehend. And she’s mine.
I rub my chest, trying to ease the mixture of emotions. I don’t understand how one person can make me feel so many things. Love. Pain. Fear. Awe. This woman has completely taken over my life, and I wouldn’t want it to be any other way.
“I’ll never be able to thank her for this,” I whisper to no one in particular.
Sterling shifts in the chair, setting his phone in his lap. “I don’t think she wants you to thank her. This is what being a family means. We do whatever we have to for each other and expect nothing in return.”
Family. Kai and Sterling have been my family since I lost mine. I know it has been the same for Sterling as well. But with the addition of Ellis, the idea of family has shifted. It’s not just me and my brothers anymore. It’s no longer late nights, drugs, alcohol, and sex. Well, it’s still sex. Now it's sex with Ellis. And Kai. It’s nights spent cuddled in bed, memories being made, and … living. And when all of this bullshit we have to deal with is over? I smile. Then we can really live. The four of us. One big happy family. I can’t fucking wait.
“So when we rescue your mom and sister …” Kai stops to clear his throat. He’s on edge, leg bouncing hard enough to rattle the empty bottle of bourbon on the coffee table. The monster is itching to escape. “Where are they going to go?”
I appreciate that he says when, not if. “There isn’t enough room here,” I say, glancing at the ceiling and the one bedroom above it. This place is barely big enough for the four of us. “And I sold the house after my dad died. All I have left is my apartment in the city.”
“They can stay at my mom’s,” Sterling offers. “She has a few empty rooms, and I know she wouldn’t mind. Besides, we have no idea what condition they’ll be in. My mom will be able to care for them if they need it.”
That thought makes me nauseous. Since Kennedy called and threatened their lives, I haven’t allowed myself to think about what could have happened to them, or what could be happening currently. If I give it too much thought, I’ll lose it.
“Thanks. I appreciate that.”
Sterling brushes off my thanks. “I assume you want to leave first thing in the morning?”
I nod. “I don’t want to wait too long.”
“If you’re okay with it, I don’t think I’m going to go. I’m not sure it would be appropriate for the alpha of the Iron Shadows pack to get involved in a personal matter, no matter how much I want to. I can head to my moms and help her get things ready, though.”
“That’s fine,” I say, nodding. “I get it. Kai and I can handle this.”
“But if something happens, call me. She is still my mate, and I’ll do whatever I have to to protect her.”
I nod again and glance at Kai. He’s staring at Ellis through the window again, eyes practically glowing. “Kai, are you okay?”
He doesn’t answer, but a soft growl rumbles in his chest. The tips of his fangs are visible, even with his mouth closed. The monster is riding him hard.
“Sterling, why don’t we go … somewhere else,” I say, tipping my head in Kai’s direction.
Sterling smirks and pushes to his feet. “Yeah, sure.”