These Wicked Desires (Fates #3)

30. Ellis

Ellis

“Hey! Where are you going?” I jump from the couch, dropping my book on the coffee table and dart after Sterling.

He turns around and opens his arms for me, and I crash into him. “Heading into town real quick. Why?”

“Can you drop me off at your moms? I want to visit Gracie.”

“Of course.” He bends down to kiss me and pulls me harder against him.

I don’t think I’ll ever get sick of this. Sterling’s kisses are my favorite. I feel guilty for thinking that, but he always kisses me with a deep passion, like he’s scared it might be the last one and he wants to make it last. I can’t say I blame him. With our history and everything that we just went through, there were many times when we thought we maybe had our last kiss.

When he pulls away I pout, making him chuckle. “Come on, kitten. Quit trying to distract me.”

“Have you talked to Cole?” I ask once we’re on the road.

He nods. “Yes.”

I wait for him to continue but he doesn’t. “Seriously, it’s like pulling teeth to get you to talk sometimes.” I huff, and narrow my eyes at him when he smirks.

“You asked me a question, and I answered it. If you wanted to know something else, you should have asked a different question.” He’s fighting his smile, and I can’t help but stare at him while he does so. He hasn’t always been so free with his smiles.

“And you guys say I’m stubborn,” I mutter under my breath. “Have you talked to Cole about Chloe?” I ask, clarifying my question.

“Ah, see? That’s a completely different question.” He smiles and I hit him in the chest. “Yes, I have.”

Again, he falls silent. “Oh for fuck’s sake, Sterling.”

He chuckles and reaches over to squeeze my thigh. “They have been talking. Cole says he’s taking things super slow with her, but he suspects he might be her soul-bonded.”

“Why does he think that? Although, it would make sense, wouldn't it? If two people from different races are fated to be together, wouldn’t that be the case?”

Sterling shrugs. “It’s not that common. I mean, it happens, but not enough for me to be aware of the details like that.” He glances at me briefly before returning his attention to the road. “But, I think it’s going to become more common. I think that’s something you may have ushered in. Mixing of the races.”

“Is that a bad thing?” I ask. I’m not sure how that will play out with the different ways races procreate. If races mixing becomes commonplace, that would risk magicals being wiped out completely.

“I don’t think so. I think nature will find a way to make things work.”

I don’t reply, because I really don’t know what to think about that. So I return my thoughts to Chloe and Cole. “Do you think they’ll get together? I think they would be great for each other.”

Sterling smiles. “I’d like to see my brother claim his mate. There is nothing quite like it.” He squeezes my leg again, his hand sliding slightly higher on my bare thigh.

The memory of him finally claiming me is one I will never forget. The connection that I always sensed magnified and glowing golden in my chest. It still does, and it warms me knowing it’s there. Knowing Sterling is there. Not to mention the sex.

I take a deep breath and push those thoughts aside, but Sterling inhales and his fingers tighten on my leg.

“What are you thinking about, Ellis?” he growls softly.

“Nothing,” I say sweetly, innocently.

His grip slips higher, and if he goes up any more, he’ll find out exactly what I’m thinking about. Although with his shifter senses, I know he already scents my arousal, but it’s too late. I am aroused, and only one thing will take care of that problem.

He growls again, this time lower and more forceful. The land rover bounces over the curb as Sterling pulls off the road and into the grass lining the street. He throws the car in park and climbs into the back seat, tugging his sweats down as he does so.

“What are you waiting for?” he asks, taking his hard cock into his hand. “Do you need an invitation?”

No. I don’t need an invitation. I climb over the seat and onto his lap, taking his face between my palms and kissing him. I love the way he always tastes like mint, and his scent of winter and pine permeate everything he touches.

“What kind of mate would I be if I left you needy and wanting?” he asks when I pull away. His fingers slide up my thighs and under my dress, hooking in my panties and slipping them down.

I shimmy out of them awkwardly. Even though there is more room in the land rover than most cars, it’s still cramped. Especially with Sterling taking up most of the space. “I was thinking about when you claimed me,” I breathe as I sit back on his lap, gliding over his cock and coating him in my arousal.

His eyes darken to a stormy blue, but it’s not just desire I see glimmering in their depths. His voice is thick with emotion when he speaks. “Something I thought would never happen. That night was a dream come true, Ellis.”

“For me, too.” I lift up and angle his cock at my entrance before slowly sitting down. This is similar to the first time we had sex, before I knew he was my mate. We were on the couch in the estate, in this exact position. And I knew at that moment, I would never be able to walk away from him. Even after his betrayal, I still needed him. I will always need him.

Sterling builds me up slowly, controlling my speed with his hands on my hips. He keeps it slow and steady. His gaze searing into me, seeing all the way to my soul. I can’t look away from that stare. Just like that time at River’s Edge, I’m lost to him.

“Come for me, kitten,” he finally says, running his tongue along my mating mark at the same time his thumb finds my clit.

I grip his shoulders and come apart with his name on my lips. He follows me, holding me tightly as he shudders through his own orgasm. When it's over and the last trembling shivers work through my body, I lay my head on his shoulder, content to stay right where we are. Safe. Satisfied. Loved. In his arms I feel it all.

“We really need to go,” he says, rubbing my back. “I do have a meeting I have to be at in like … twenty minutes.”

I nod, but I don’t move. He doesn’t try to make me either. We stay there for another few minutes before he sighs. “Okay. For real this time.”

Reluctantly, I slide off his lap and tug my panties back on while he tucks himself into his pants. “That was fun,” I say. “We should do it more often.” I grin at him, while he climbs back into the driver's seat.

“Just say the word. You know I’ll be there.”

He pulls into the driveway and gives me a lingering kiss before I step out and walk to the porch. As always, Shari’s house smells of some kind of delectable baked good, and judging by the cinnamon scent, it's something I will love. I head to the kitchen, to say hi and to also see if there is anything ready to eat.

“Hi Shari,” I say.

She turns around, wiping her flour covered hands on an apron and beams at me. “Ellis! I didn’t know you were coming today. How are you?”

“I’m good. I wasn’t planning on it, but I caught Sterling leaving and hitched a ride with him.”

She looks over my shoulder, eyes hopeful. “Is he here?”

“No. He just dropped me off. But I’ll make sure he stops in when he picks me up.” I eye the counter, looking for something to snag, and she catches me.

“Would you like a cinnamon cookie? They’re Sterling’s favorite.” She smiles and waves to the counter where a plate of fresh baked goodness waits.

“Thank you.” It’s still warm, like she just took them out of the oven, and the cinnamon and brown sugar on top flake off into my palm. I take a bite and my eyes close. “Oh my gosh,” I mumble around the soft chewy cookie. “This is delicious.” I can totally see why these are Sterling’s favorite.

Shari chuckles. “Thank you. It was my grandmother's recipe.” She hands me a couple more on a napkin. “Take one to Grace. See if you can get her to eat one.”

“How has she been?” I ask, my stomach falling.

“About the same. Chloe has been trying to get her to eat, but she only picks at her food. She has been more willing to leave the room, but she needs to be assured there are no men in the house when she does.”

My heart clenches. I don’t think Sam did anything to her like he did to me. But just the brutal treatment she endured from him is enough to scar her. I understand that feeling all too well. I’ve put off forcing her to talk to me, but I think maybe I should step in.

“Thank you. For everything. For letting her stay here. Her and Cade’s family. We really appreciate it.”

Shari waves off my thanks. “Don’t mention it. With Cole out of the house helping Sterling, it’s nice to have other people around. And it gives me an excuse to cook.”

I laugh and snag one more cookie before heading upstairs. Chloe and her mom are still in the same room. Cade’s mom has improved, but is still incredibly weak. I haven’t ventured in to talk to her yet. My nerves always get the better of me, and I chicken out. I’m not sure why I’m so scared to meet her. Maybe it’s because she’s sick and so weak, I’m afraid it will just be awkward.

Gracie has a separate room right next door, and I knock before poking my head in. “Gracie? It’s me, Ellis.”

She’s out of bed, wrapped in a blanket and sitting next to the window looking out. She doesn’t acknowledge my presence, but I step into the room anyway and sit on the edge of the bed.

“Shari made cinnamon cookies. They are really good. Would you like one?”

No answer. I bite my lip and glance out the window. The view overlooks the woods behind the house. The same woods we crept through all those months ago for Sterling to see his mom and brother. The same woods I realized I wanted to accept him as my mate. The man who was there the night I thought my sister was killed. She may have not truly died that night, but her life did end. The life she knew with her family, the life of comfort and love, was taken from her. She lived so long under Sam. Longer than I did. I’m not sure it will be possible for her to come back from it. But I’m certainly going to try.

“The weather is really nice today,” I say. “It’s the kind of weather we used to love as kids. When the last few days of summer warmth were joined with a chilly fall breeze.” I look at her, hoping to see some kind of reaction, but her face is blank. I don’t even know if she’s hearing what I’m saying. “Do you want to sit outside with me?” I hold my breath. If she says no, or ignores me, I’m not sure I’ll be able to handle it. It’s one of the reasons I haven’t visited as often as I should.

It hurts to see her like this. Gracie was always so full of life. She was the one who encouraged me to do things I was too scared to try. She was the reason we got into so much trouble with our mom. I never saw her without a smile. This zombie version of her is just too painful.

I’m about to get up and leave when she nods. My heart leaps into my throat and I swallow back the lump it forms. “Yeah? Okay. Let’s go.”

She keeps the blanket around her, and I lead her downstairs to the porch. Shari has a rocking bench with cushions and pillows positioned to look out over the beautiful landscape of the pack lands. Her house is off on its own, tucked away in a clearing in the woods. It’s peaceful with the wind blowing through the trees and the sounds of insects. The sky is just starting to turn the palest shades of pink and orange as the sun slowly sinks lower to the horizon.

We sit in silence for a few minutes while I gather my courage to say something. Before I get the opportunity, the Hummer pulls up the driveway. Cade and Kai climb out and approach the house, hand in hand. I don’t give them the chance to get close to Gracie. When she saw them get out of the car, her entire body stiffened. So I hop down the porch and stop them.

“What are you doing?” I ask.

“You woke up early today,” Kai says, leaning down to kiss me. “And you left without saying goodbye.”

“Sorry. I was scared to wake you up.”

He snorts. “I’m not the difficult one to wake up.”

“Yes you are! You are just as bad as I am.” I glare at him, daring him to say something.

“Let’s ask Cade who he thinks is worse to wake up, shall we?”

Cade rolls his eyes and holds up his hand. “You bit me. Kai has never bitten me.” He frowns and his lips twitch. “At least, not like you did.”

Kai flashes his fangs. “See? Told you.”

“Whatever.” I cross my arms over my chest and eyeball them. “Seriously though, what are you doing here?”

“Sterling asked me to come help him with something,” Cade replies, snaking out his arm to tug me close. “I didn’t want to deal with Kai this early, so I’m dropping him off here for you to deal with.”

“Oh, please don’t,” I say. “I’ve been having such a good morning.”

“I’m right here, you know. I can hear everything you’re saying.” Kai tugs one of my curls and I swat his hand away.

“I just got Gracie outside, so I don’t want to freak her out with you guys being here.”

“I’m leaving anyway,” Cade says, bending down to kiss me. “I’ll be back later. Take care of Kai while I’m gone.” He grins and turns to the vampire in question. “Be good.”

“What does that mean?” Kai grins and grabs Cade’s face in his palms. The kiss is dominant and extremely hot. He pulls away and smirks at me. “We better stop, or Ellis is going to jump us right here.”

“Whatever,” I mutter and turn back toward the porch. “Shari is inside baking. You should join her. Maybe she can teach you a thing or two.”

Gracie doesn’t relax again until Cade pulls away and Kai disappears inside. I bite my lip and turn to her, ready to ask my question, but once again, I don’t get to.

She turns to me, eyes focusing on me for the first time, and says, “Tell me about them.”

I gape at her for a moment before shaking my head. “Cade and Kai?”

She nods. “Isn’t there another one, too?”

“Yeah. Sterling. This is his mom’s house.”

“Tell me about them.”

“I think to really get the full picture I need to start back at the beginning. The night I thought you died.” I watch her closely as I dive into the story. I’m sure it’s not easy for her to hear about how I mourned her loss, dealt with the injustices of being human, and was raped and beaten for two years by the same man who held her captive. It’s not easy for me to talk about. Even after the number of times I’ve shared this story, and the fact that it’s all over, it’s still hard to put myself back in those moments. But I do it for her. And I’ll do it again, I’m sure, for someone else who needs to hear it. Like Chloe did.

Gracie looks down at her hands, twisting and squeezing them together. “How did you do it?” she whispers.

“Do what?” I ask gently.

“How did you move on? How did you learn to let a man touch you after … after …”

“I was lucky. I met my mates. But it took time, and it wasn’t easy. It’s still not always easy. But knowing I have people who care about me helps a lot. I know I can go to them if I need to. I have to remind myself that I’m not alone anymore, and I frequently need them to remind me as well.”

She nods and swallows. “I don’t know how to do that.”

“I get it, Gracie. I really do. But you’re not alone anymore either. And keeping yourself locked in that room where all you do is think about everything that’s happened is not going to help. You need to dig deep and find that courage I know you possess. I’m always here to talk to you. Or not talk, if you just want someone to sit with you. Chloe also went through something similar. I know she could use the company sometimes too.”

Gracie nods, chewing on her bottom lip. “I’m scared,” she whispers.

“I know,” I say gently. “I was too. Sometimes I still am. But I promise it does get easier.” We fall silent as the sun sinks lower, the first few stars appearing in the darkening sky. “Do you remember when we used to wish on the first star we saw at night?”

She lifts her head to the sky, and a small smile twitches on her lips. She doesn’t say anything, but she nods.

“Make a wish, Gracie. I think you’d be surprised at how often they come true.”