36. Lilly
Chapter 36
Lilly
“ H ow are you holding up, Lilly Lou?” Aunt Christine asks through the speaker of my car.
I sigh, not sure where to even start. “I’m okay, for the most part,” I finally respond. “Cooper and Noah got the security cameras put in this week, so there's that, I guess.”
“Is it weird to have them around?”
I shrug, even though she can't see it. “It’s both a reminder of what happened and a safety net at the same time. It’s weird.” I turn to go down the main street of Sonoma on my way to the grocery store.
“I’m sure it probably feels like Big Brother’s watching you, but I have to be honest, it’s a big relief knowing you've got something to help protect you.”
“And Noah's been staying with us just about every night,” I tell her.
I can practically hear her smile through the phone. “He has, has he?”
I huff out a laugh. “Yes, he has. Everything's been above board. Nellie's been loving having sleepovers with him.”
“And what about Mom? How are you feeling about it?”
A warm feeling rushes over me as I think about waking up in Noah's arms every morning. “It's been pretty great if I'm honest.” I refuse to tell her about the times Nellie has almost caught us having sex. She’d tell me we should move into Mom and Dad’s room, but I just can’t do it. It’s too weird. We’ll have to figure something out soon, but for now, I like having Noah and Nellie in the same room as me, even if it doesn’t offer us as much privacy as we’d like.
Aunt Christine squeals as if she's a teenager. “This makes me so happy for you.”
I laugh and shake my head. “How are things going with the store?
“Trying to find somebody new to take over this part-time position has been a pain in the ass, but I've got a couple of interviews coming up that seem promising. Hopefully, I'll be able to hire somebody soon and get back to Sonoma with my girls.”
“We really do miss you.” I still haven’t gotten used to her being gone. Noah's been a great distraction, but it's not quite the same.
“I miss you girls, too, every single day. What are you up to tonight?”
“Noah's making us dinner, and Nellie and I have plans to rope him into making a craft.”
“Please send pictures,” Christine teases.
I pull into the parking lot of the grocery store and say goodbye to Christine. It's pretty busy, as expected, given it's the only grocery store in town and it's late afternoon. Most everyone is picking up their groceries right now.
I make my way inside, opening the list on my phone. As I'm shopping, I'm stopped by no less than four different people, asking how I'm doing and checking in on Nellie. They make small talk, as one does in a small-town grocery store, but what’s surprising is a lot of them ask about how Noah is healing after his accident.
A part of me gets a little weirded out that they know Noah and I are back together. The other part of me is happy they care enough to ask me about him.
Living in Greensboro, my goal was to disappear in the crowd.
I didn't want to be noticed. I didn't want anybody to come up and talk to me. I just wanted to go about my business without any interruptions.
Coming back to Sonoma, I'm reminded there’s no such thing as disappearing here. There is no going through the grocery store without being stopped at least once.
I'm sorting through the tomatoes when yet another person comes up to say hi, except this time, I don’t recognize his voice.
“You're Lilly, right?”
I turn to look at him, taking in his dark features. His hair is long and straight on the top and trimmed short on the sides, and his dark eyes are piercing, making me think that I've seen him before, but I can't remember where. He's in a T-shirt and running shorts, so maybe he's a local and I remember him from school.
“Yeah, that’s me. Remind me who are you?
“Oh, Tony. I'm Tony. I knew your parents.
“Oh, yes.” My head tilts to the side in confusion. If he knew my parents, why is he still here? Then it dawns on me. “You were at the funeral, right?”
Tony nods. “I was. I thought it was a beautiful service.”
I smile noncommittally. I mean, the service was fine. It was basically a wake, and nothing happened, so I guess I can understand why he would say that.
“How are you? Are you doing okay?” Tony asks, moving on from the odd funeral comments.
“I’m all right. How are you?” I think this might be the weirdest conversation I've had.
“I’m okay.”
“What are you still doing in town?”
“Oh, after the funeral, I thought I would spend a little extra time here.”
“It's a beautiful place. I loved growing up here.”
“How long did you live here?”
Alarm bells start ringing in my head, and my stomach tightens with nerves. I'm sure at any other point in my life, this conversation would seem totally innocent. Right now, I don't feel comfortable talking to some random stranger about my life here.
Given what I've learned recently, there's no way I’d willingly share information about myself with a stranger.
“I’ve lived here since I was a kid, but I should get going. I need to get these groceries back home so I can start on dinner for my kiddo.” I grit my teeth, mad at myself for giving away the fact that I have a kid. How stupid.
I don't give him a chance to respond. Instead, I turn around and leave without the fruit.
The next time I go grocery shopping, I'm bringing Noah or anyone else who'd be willing to come with me. Until we find whoever broke into the house, I won’t go anywhere alone again.
With quick steps, I race toward the checkout counter, not wanting to spend much longer in the grocery store.
Ryan, one of Noah and Lottie’s cousins, is bagging groceries. His light brown hair is a mess on his head, but his hazel eyes sparkle with happiness. “Hey, Miss Lilly. How are you?” His crooked grin makes me smile and momentarily forget about my nerves.
“I’m doing great. And please don't call me Miss. It makes me feel old.”
Ryan chuckles. “You got it. Is Noie with Nellie today?” He starts placing my groceries down into the plastic bags.
“Yeah, they're at home right now. I'm grabbing groceries for him to make dinner tonight.”
“Tell him I said hi.”
“I will.” I put my credit card in the pay slot and glance over my shoulder to make sure I'm still safe. My eyes catch on Tony’s, and I immediately turn back toward the cashier, my heart pounding.
I can't walk out to my car alone.
If I ask Ryan, something could happen to him, too, but what other option do I have? The two of us walking next to each other or me walking alone?
I just have to hope it looks like he's helping take my groceries out to the car and not protecting me.
“Hey, Ryan. Would you mind helping me carry my groceries out to my car? I hurt my wrist and could use a little help,” I lie. I don’t want to freak him out or have anyone overhear me.
“I’d be happy to help you.” Ryan smiles. He scoops up the majority of the plastic bags, and I take the remaining ones.
We walk outside to the car together. “I’m really sorry to put you on the spot, Ryan,” I say as we walk outside. “I think there is a guy following me.”
His head whips up to look at me. He checks over his shoulder at the empty lot. “My dad told me a little about what's going on, and I'm really sorry this is happening to you. I’m glad you said something. I would’ve hated myself if something happened to you while you walked out here alone.”
“Thanks, Ryan.” I decide to change the subject. “It's kind of hard to believe how much you've grown up in the last eight years, which sounds stupid when I say that out loud, but seriously, you've changed so much, and yet not at all.”
A self-deprecating smile quirks at the corner of Ryan's lips. “If only I didn’t have this baby face.”
I laugh. “You think that, but I bet people would line up to date you if you gave them a sign.”
Ryan blushes. “I’m not so sure that's true, but I'll take your word for it.” Ryan gets the groceries into my trunk, and I give him a hug.
“Thank you for walking me out to my car.”
“Of course. Make sure you bring Nellie around to a family barbecue one night. We'd all really love to meet her.”
“I’ll do that. We've been showing her pictures of everyone in your family. Then she’ll already know everybody before she gets over there.”
“Perfect. I’ll see you later.” He turns and heads back into the grocery store, and I get into my car.
With a quick look around the parking lot, I make sure nobody's standing out there waiting for me.
I can't see Tony or anybody else, for that matter.
And all I can do is hope that my intuition was wrong.