43. Lilly
“ You look beautiful,” Cassie says, her hands clasped over her heart.
Rachel pins the last piece of hair into my updo. “Agreed. I can't believe you found that dress in Tish's store.”
“When I got out of the hospital, I told her what I was looking for, and she'd been keeping an eye out for me. When she called, I knew she had the exact dress I wanted.” I rubbed my hands over the silky white fabric. It’s a simple A-line dress with a tight bodice and spaghetti straps. I didn’t want anything fancy, but I wanted it to look elegant.
“Can you believe you're finally getting married? And to Noah, of all people?” Cassie gushes. “It feels like just yesterday we were giggling about the two of you going on your first date.”
“The number of times I signed my name as Lilly James in my notebooks is a little embarrassing,” I joke.
“But hey, look where you ended up.” Rachel grins.
Over the past three months, the three of us have gotten really close. Girls' nights have become a regular occurrence, some including Nellie and others not. Now that the renovations are done and the house is finished, it feels as if I’m finally settling into life in Sonoma.
A knock on the door has all three of us turning toward it. We’ve been holed up in the primary suite since our bathroom is the largest in the house. Rachel and Cassie have on gorgeous, lavender summer dresses, and our makeup is done. There’s not much left to do now.
“It’s just me,” Natalie calls out. She walks in and gasps when she sees me. “Oh, darling girl, you look beautiful.” She gathers me up in her arms for a tight hug. I am so incredibly grateful for her. These past few months would’ve been a nightmare without her. She was pivotal in helping me design the house, plan the wedding, and weed through the insane dreams and PTSD I’ve had from the fire. I’m not sure I’d be standing here without her.
Christine has been just as involved. She found herself a cute little apartment in town and is planning on opening a second store in Sonoma. When she announced she’d be staying forever, I bawled my eyes out.
“Okay,” Natalie says, pulling back to wipe the tears from her eyes. “Enough blubbering. I come bearing gifts.” She holds out a familiar manila envelope. “Noah asked me to hand this over to you. Seems like an odd wedding present, but I am doing what I'm told.”
I take it from her hands with a giggle. “Trust me, this is the perfect present.” There's a sticky note on top in Noah's handwriting.
Lilly, I am delivering on the promise I made you. All I ask is that you read these alone.
My eyebrows furrow at that. “I’ve been told I have to read these alone,” I share with the girls.
“Then we better leave you to it,” Rachel says. “It's about time to get started, so make it quick.”
They file out of my and Noah’s bedroom, leaving a silent calmness in their wake. That feeling has made me fall head over heels in love with the house. Every time I walk in, a sense of safety and peace overwhelms me. I couldn’t have picked a better place for our family.
With a deep breath, I open the envelope, pulling out a sheath of papers. My eyes widen as I read the first one, realizing it's a letter from Noah.
At first, I think they're letters he wrote recently until my eyes snag on the date in the corner.
Tears blur my vision as each word washes over me. My heart is absolutely breaking.
I always knew he loved me, but reading these words and knowing this is how he felt while we were separated solidifies every ounce of love I’ve held for him.
I have no doubt he’ll love me until the end of time.
I pause at the last one, wiping my eyes with the tissues from the box on my nightstand.
This final one is dated today.
Bumblebee,
Today is the day I have dreamt of for a very long time.
I'm finally getting to marry you.
When I first read over these letters again, I was embarrassed. They sounded so desperate, and for a moment, I debated about throwing them away.
I wasn't sure I was up for sharing them with you.
But then I realized that I wrote them for a reason. I wanted you to know how much I loved you, even when I wanted to hate you, despite believing you’d never read the words.
Looking back now, it's easy to see that we were always destined to be together.
We were always going to end up here, on our wedding day, saying I do, forever.
I wouldn’t want to be in this life with anyone else but you, and no matter what happens in our future, I will always fight for us.
I will always be yours,
Noah.
There’s a good chance my heart may burst out of my chest from all the emotions crashing through me.
No one has ever loved me the way Noah does, and in this moment, I know no one will ever compare to him.
I put the letters back in the envelope and place them in my nightstand drawer, on top of Noah’s wedding present. I decided at the last minute to wait until tonight to give it to him.
I hustle down the stairs, ready to tell the man I love that I want to be his forever.
The girls are in the hallway, waiting by the back door, and Tucker and Natalie stand next to them, chatting quietly.
Tucker turns towards me, and his eyes widen. His smile stretches across his face as he takes me in. “You look beautiful, Lilly Bug.” He wraps me in strong arms, and I do my best not to fall apart.
I asked him to walk me down the aisle, and he agreed without a second of hesitation.
“You ready to get this show on the road?”
I smile up at him. “Beyond ready.”
We get everybody into their places, letting them know that we're ready to start.
Natalie starts us off, walking down the aisle in a gorgeous, light purple dress that flows to her ankles. Cassie and Rachel follow behind her, walking side by side. Carson and Cody are already at the altar, standing by Noah.
Once they've made it to their spots, Tucker grabs my hand and wraps it around his elbow.
My bouquet sits in my other hand, and the walk down the aisle becomes a blur.
The only person I see is Noah. Even when we are both tearing up and all I can see is his watery outline, I don’t take my eyes off him.
When we finally get to the end, Tucker hands me over to Noah. “Take good care of her.”
“Always,” Noah responds.
We turn toward Cooper, and he begins the service. When we found out he was certified to marry us, there was no other choice. He was the perfect person.
Everything from then on is a blur of words I repeat and rings exchanged. We both decided to repeat vows instead of making up our own. I'm glad, now that I know about Noah's capability to write a beautiful letter. He would have had me bawling my eyes out by the time he was done with his vows.
It seems as if only minutes have passed by the time Cooper says, “You may kiss your bride.”
Noah wraps his arm around my waist and dips me low, kissing me with all the love and desire that I feel in return.
Our family cheers, and when Noah tips me back up, Nellie scrambles up to our side.
We wrap our arms around her in a tight hug. Her grin is wide as she holds our hands, walking back down the aisle with us.
It's the perfect symbolism for the three of us walking into our future together as a family.
The rest of the evening is spent laughing and dancing, eating more food than is healthy, and celebrating with the people we love most.
My wedding was everything I wanted it to be.
Noah and I spend most of our time dancing together, with the occasional interruption from Nellie.
When the night begins to wind down, Natalie and Tucker come up to us with Nellie in hand.
“Nellie asked if she could have a sleepover with us,” Natalie says.
My eyebrows raise as I look at her.
“Please, Mom. I really want to stay with Gram and Pop.”
“That's fine with me,” I tell her. “Shall we go pack your stuff?”
“Yes!” Nellie squeals. She races into the house, and after a wink from Noah, I follow behind her.
Most of our guests begin to trickle out once Natalie and Tucker leave until Noah and I are the only people left in our house.
“Whatever will we do now, Mrs. James?”
I grin up at him. “Did you happen to have this planned?”
“Well, let's just say I've been hinting to Nellie that it would be really fun to have a sleepover at Gram and Pops’s after the wedding. I've been subtly bringing it up all week. I had no clue it would work, though.”
I laugh. The likelihood of Noah pulling this off was slim to none, but somehow he managed it. “Then we'd better take advantage of our alone time.”
I turn on a dime to race upstairs, with Noah chasing after me. I squeal at the sound of his feet thumping on the floor behind me.
I burst into our bedroom, frantically looking around for a place to hide. Noah's arms wrap around me and lift me off the floor as I squeak.
“Got you, Bumblebee,” he growls in my ear. He throws me onto the bed, my body bouncing on impact. He looks gorgeous in his linen pants and suspenders. I want to lick him.
In fact… I sit up, reaching out for the button on his pants. I make quick work of shucking off the suspenders and yanking his pants down to his ankles.
Without anything in my way, I take the head of his cock into my mouth, licking and sucking on him as if he’s the best dessert of the night.
“Lilly…” Noah gasps. “Oh, fuck.”
“Later,” I tease. I take him as far as I can and then push myself to take more. Noah’s hands spear into my hair as he starts to thrust into my mouth. It’s dirty and hot and everything I wanted.
“No.” He yanks me off him. “I want to come inside my wife tonight.”
I shiver at his dirty words. “I’m all yours.”
Noah pulls off his button-down while I work the zipper at the side of my dress. The silky material floats down my body, showing off the bare skin underneath.
“Fuck, I’m glad I didn’t know you were naked under there.” Noah reaches out to cup my breast, pinching the nipple between his fingers.
I lean back on the bed, pulling him down over me.
“You’re so fucking gorgeous, Lilly,” he whispers against my lips. “I can’t believe I get to call you my wife forever.”
He lines up the head of his cock with my entrance and slowly pushes in. Where a moment ago, we were dirty words and filthier actions, now we’re slow hands and passionate embraces.
Noah’s thrusts drag across my clit, pushing me higher and higher until I’m about to break. I’m not afraid, though. Noah will hold me together through it all.
And it’s that thought that makes me explode. I tighten around him, the orgasm sending waves of ecstasy through my body.
Noah is right behind me, thrusting through his own orgasm as he moans my name. He kisses me softly, our breaths mingling as we pant.
“I’ve never been happier,” Noah says. “You've made me the happiest man in the world today.”
I press a kiss to his soft lips. “I can’t believe you’re my husband. It’s everything I’ve ever wanted. Thank you for sharing your letters with me. It means more to me than you'll ever know.”
We kiss a little bit longer, soaking in the moment of our happiness. I pull back, taking a deep breath. “I have one more surprise for you.”
Noah's eyebrows raise in question. Reaching over to my nightstand, I pull out the small plastic test I took earlier this morning.
Handing it over, I bite my lip as I watch him digest what he's seeing. His eyes widen in shock. “Are you serious?”
I nod, unable to find my words.
“You're pregnant,” Noah says reverently. “We're gonna have another baby?”
I grin wide. “Yeah, we are.”
Noah puts his hand across my abdomen and drops his mouth to my belly with a kiss. “Hey, Peanut. I need you to close your eyes and your ears for a little bit. I'm about to do some really dirty things to your mom.”