Chapter 11
Riley
I let myself stew in my anger all night and all day, but when it came time for dinner, I knew I couldn't leave the man without anything to eat.
Instead of making my normal-sized meal, I made enough for two. After eating, I left a plate for him on his porch when there was no answer after ringing the bell.
I did the same again today. Only when I step up on the porch, I see the plate of food I left yesterday untouched. Anger swims inside of me.
I know I played a part in what happened the other night. I'm the one who turned up the fire under the grease to an unsafe level, but I had every intention of being there and turning it back down once it reached the temperature I needed for the spring rolls.
Mac was the one who interrupted all of that. I've never started a fire in a kitchen before because I've never been literally swept off my feet and fucked stupid while cooking.
He blames me. He made it very clear, but I figured in his anger at the immediate situation, he said things he didn't mean. It's why this food was sort of a peace offering. I didn't actually think he never wanted me to show up, but I know he strategically left my things on my front porch while I wasn't there. My house doesn't have a garage, so he had to have waited for a time when my car wasn't in the driveway to bring my things back.
I found them on my porch in the fifteen minutes I was gone running an errand. The grumpy bastard doesn't even have the balls to face me, and that irritates me more than anything.
I could tell by the look in Hayes Campbell's eyes the other night that he suspected correctly why I would've gotten distracted. It wasn't until I got home and thought about it that the old self-conscious shit settled in. I let myself imagine that Mac treated me the way he did in front of Hayes because he was embarrassed about what happened between us. Like I was something he only indulged in behind closed doors where no one else would be privileged to the information. He was ashamed of me, and that hit me a little harder than it should've for a woman who has worked really hard on her confidence level.
Instead of picking up the food and walking away with both plates, I replace the cold plate of food with a fresh one. I'm trying to be the bigger person, and this is more about me and fighting that pettiness that always seems to leak out where Mac is concerned. If he doesn't want to eat the food, then that's on him. It won't be because I didn't offer the man something to eat because his kitchen is currently unusable.
I decide that if I come back tomorrow and the food has been untouched, I'll stop leaving it. I can't force him to eat any more than he could apologize for how he acted and make me feel better about myself.
I don't know how much the McGees saw, but I did hear Mr. McGee mention my last name, so he had to have known I was in the house. What I haven't heard is my name in relation to the fire, although I have heard whispers of people feeling bad for Mac and what happened at his home. I guess I should be grateful that he hasn't told people that he blames me for it. Hayes seems to have kept his mouth shut about me being there as well.
Maybe they have a pact—don't tell anyone in town that the chubby girl caused a problem in the kitchen.
I growl in irritation as I walk down the front steps, missing the last one in my distracted state and nearly falling on my ass. In my head, I blame Mac for that as well. He probably made the stairs different heights or something just to make people fall. It seems like something he would do.
I have a mild limp in my steps, having twisted my left ankle in my attempt to not faceplant in his front yard as I walk back to my car. After shoving the cold plate of food onto my passenger seat, I get my ass out of there. The last thing I want is for him to think I'm stalking him if he decides now is the best time to come home.
I feel like a complete fool as I drive away. I never should've left the bar with him that night. I never should've called him back or even shown up at his house, ready to cook for him after the way he treated me. I must be a masochist with how many times I've fallen for his bullshit.
Great sex is one thing, but being repeatedly mistreated over and over just because the sex is good seems like a mental health issue. I consider being evaluated by a mental health professional. I can't be the first woman to ignore a million triggers just because they got dicked down so well.
I take a deep breath when I pull up outside of the bookstore. We're having a little end-of-the-year inventory party. It's not really a party, but New Year's Eve is tomorrow, and the counts have to be complete before we ring in the new year.
Several cars are parked out front as the sun sets behind the buildings.
Lindell really is a quaint, cute little town. As much as I complain about people not being willing to give my food a try, we do have some pretty incredible people here.
I use my key to gain access to the store, walking inside to the sound of feminine laughter, the scent of books and sugar enveloping me as I lock the door.
I round the end cap of new releases to see several women smiling and laughing, as well as a small table covered in treats. Madison Woodson, who recently married Chase, the hometown hockey hero, turns to me with a smile, her hand covering her very swollen belly.
"Hey," I say, giving the best smile I can manage.
The irritation where Mac is concerned is very slow to wither away, but the sight of the cupcakes on the table has the ability to shoo them away quicker than if there weren't sugary snacks on offer.
"Riley!" Sage says with a wide smile. "I was just telling Claire about your menu."
I look over to see Claire Kennedy, surprised she's here since she normally keeps to herself. Claire has recently entered into a relationship with Walker, the owner of The Hairy Frog.
"I'm over here salivating at the idea of apples and cranberries on a turkey panini," Claire says.
"Don't forget the warm and gooey cheese," Adalynn adds.
"You get free paninis if I can have one of those cupcakes," I say.
Adalynn waves her hand before resting it on her round belly. "Have all that you want."
"That's a dangerous offer," I say, clamping my mouth shut, but not one of these women raises an eyebrow at my declaration.
Not one of them is the type to judge me for having a cupcake, despite the extra pounds I have that they don't.
"I thought you would be here a little earlier," Sage says as I reach for one of the chocolate cupcakes with chocolate icing.
Eating my feelings isn't exactly healthy, but it could be drugs, so I guess it isn't all that damn bad.
Instead of explaining to her where I was, knowing everyone else here would hear, I take a huge bite of cupcake, trying to use it as a distraction. I groan when the decadent flavor of the icing hits my tongue.
"I made that noise last week," Madison said. "It was noon before Chase let me out of the bedroom."
Adalynn and Claire both emit a knowing chuckle as if they have experienced the exact same thing with their partners.
Sage rolls her lips between her teeth to keep from smiling. She's a little more reserved when it comes to such conversations, and I thought Adalynn was too. It seems her newly announced relationship with her best male friend of forever has changed things up a little in her life.
As much as I'd like to get the opinion of women in relationships about what I should do about Mac, when I'm done chewing, I just smile.
Maybe a little girl time is what I need rather than bringing everyone's mood down with the shit I've been dealing with where that stupid man is concerned.
We spend the evening laughing, telling stories, and counting books. I don't mention the woman who threw soup on me, and I especially don't mention Mac. I don't interject much at all, letting the others do all the talking.
I catch Sage, who knows me better than any of the other women, watching me more than a handful of times, and I do my best to give her a look to explain that I'll talk to her later. But even with the dip of her head in acknowledgment, she doesn't stop looking concerned.
"I think he's going to want me pregnant again as soon as possible," Adalynn whispers. "Once he accepted that he doesn't have to be anything like his adoptive parents, he's a hundred percent onboard with having a big family."
"You have a lot of years to make up for," Madison, Adalyn's best friend, declares before turning her attention across the room. "Claire? What about you and Walker? Any plans for a baby?"
"We have Larkin," the woman says with a delicate smile at the mention of her daughter.
No one argues with her.Claire was married to another man from Lindell, and after Hux Kennedy died in a training accident on the military base, she came back here to be close to his family. It's one of those subjects that most people are respectful of and don't bring up.
"What about you, Sage? Is there a man in your life?"
"Too many to count," she says with a wide smile.
"Any that aren't fictional?" I tease, giving her a nudge with my elbow.
Her smile grows wider. "Not a chance. Real men are scum, with the exception of your three, of course. "
Everyone laughs at the ridiculousness of it, but Sage may be on to something. The only three good men left may have all been recently scooped up by Claire, Adalyn, and Madison, leaving no one left for the rest of us.
Mac Hammer definitely doesn't fit into the good-guy mold the others have been cast from. I can't think of one instance where Chase, Walker, or Cash would treat anyone with the same level of disrespect that Mac has thrown my way.
Conversation shifts, first going to the names they're thinking of for their babies until landing on plans for New Year's Eve tomorrow.
Before the evening is done, several cupcakes swimming in my gut, it's decided that hanging out at The Hairy Frog is the best choice. Although I'd rather stay at home and drown my sorrow in chocolate syrup and ice cream, I conclude that having some more girl time might be exactly what I need to forget all about Mac.