Chapter 19
Back at the condo after the game, we eat a stilted dinner of take-out pizza from Regina’s sitting at opposite ends of the couch watching a re-run of Saturday night live. We agree that meeting the families went well.
Maybe too well. The lie seemed too easy to pull off. I don’t dare say this out loud, but I do wonder if she thinks the same.
“What did you think of the game?” I finally bring up hockey which has strangely been absent from our sparse conversation. I’m used to post game replays with the guys. Maybe we should have gone out with them, but it didn’t seem like the right thing to do at the time, like maybe we had to regroup on the family meeting.
She turns to me. “Fishing for compliments?”
“No, but you haven’t said a word about the game and wasn’t that the whole point?”
“The game was fast. And I admit it, you were great. Congrats on the two goals.” She smiles like she means it and I feel that spark of satisfaction, but I push it aside. “You coach must be happy with you, right?”
I nod. She knows I’m having trouble with Coach since the fight with George went viral, which was predictable.
It doesn’t take long for my exhaustion to catch up with me and I say the words that is guaranteed to expose the topic that’s causing our uneasiness, the proverbial elephant in the room.
“I’m heading for bed.”
She looks at me like I’ve startled her and freezes for a beat, then she reverts to her wiseass persona.
“Good. You need your rest. I’ll be sleeping in the office on the floor.”
“The hell you will. No way is that happening. How about if I sleep on the couch and you can sleep in my bed?”
“Alone?”
I nod even though it kills me. Some sick need in me forces me to think of her first.
“That’s chivalrous of you, and unexpected, you being a pirate and all.”
“Don’t make me change my mind.”
“There’s a lock on the door, right?”
I raise my eyebrows, insulted, until I see her smirk appear. “You’re too much of a smart ass for your own good, you know that?”
“I’ve been told. By my brothers.”
I grunt. Why am I glad she qualified that statement with her brothers? Shit, I need sleep. I get up from the couch and she follows, taking the empty pizza boxes to the trash.
I grab some pillows and a blanket and bring them back to the living room while I watch her sashay into my bedroom. Damn.
Luckily my couch is large and comfortable. It’s not the first time someone has slept here—usually Jason.
But it’s the first time I’m sleeping here and I swear there is something wrong with my head
In the morning,I wake to the smell of coffee brewing and when I throw on some sweats and come out to the kitchen, I see that she’s made coffee. She turns to me and shakes her head.
“You look like you didn’t get much sleep.”
“Thanks. I didn’t sleep at all. Something about that bed reminds me of you.”
I squelch a smile. “If you’re angling for the couch?—”
“I’m getting an air mattress today as soon as I wake up.”
She looks sexy standing in my kitchen, leaning on the island for support in an oversized Whalers t-shirt with her hair messy and her face flushed and soft, and her blue eyes half-lidded and dark rimmed and... shit.
“That’s not the only solution to the problem,” I say. “I could?—”
“Really? You’re going to try and land us back in your bed together again?”
“I have confidence in our ability to resist those evil feelings you talk about. We’re both mature cynical adults, aren’t we?”
She snort-laughs and almost spills her coffee. I grin, a warm feeling spreading across my chest and I find myself moving closer to her without meaning to, like my body has an attraction that defies free will.
“Come to lunch with me today. I have some time.” God dammit. What possesses me to ask the woman I should be holding at arms-length to have lunch with me? Shit. “You can meet me at the arena, meet some of the guys, and Coach Spence.” That’ll win me points with him. Maybe. At least he’ll know I’m not making her up out of fairy dust.
“Oh… how unexpected. I would, but I already made plans to have lunch with Cherry and Tina.”
I nod, keeping my disappointment to myself. “No problem. That’s good. You should make friends with them. They’re good people.”
“Sure. Right.” She gives me that intense blue look like she’s reading my mind and I look away from her and busy myself grabbing some cookies from the cabinet, then taking a handful of Oreos and flipping one to her as I stuff one in my mouth.
She doesn’t catch it. We both laugh and I figure the awkward moment has passed.
But no.
“I wrote a song for you.” The words trip from her mouth, running into each other. “It’s nothing. I mean it’s about you, about us. About deception and confusion and most of all chemistry.”
Each word she says adds weight to my chest until it’s hard to breathe. Is she trying to kill me? I hate that she wrote a song filled with feelings—and yet, I can’t get rid of my rising excitement, the flicker of satisfaction and warmth that she cares enough?—
Fuck it.
“Sing it for me tonight.”
“I will.”
“Promise me.” What am I doing?
“I promise.” Her breathy words send a spiral of pleasure through me and I’m gone far before it reaches my dick. In fact my dick is the last thing in me that registers the excitement—or whatever the hell it is that she’s doing to me.
I’m not staying lateafter practice today. It’s not that I’m in a rush to get home. Tomorrow morning we need to leave early for our game in Chicago, so no one is staying late. Coach Spence comes into the locker room and walks through checking in with Sabien.
I don’t avoid him, watching him as he talks with Sabe. He’s avoiding me. No eye contact and certainly not stopping to talk with me or tap my shoulder like he does with some of the guys. But in this case, no attention is good news.
I stop at a gift shop to buy some flowers and candy. Then I head to a book store. I have no idea what I’m doing because the only women I’ve ever bought a gift for before in my life are all related to me.
Plus, I have no idea why I’m doing it. Standing in front of a rack of books, I don’t know what to get her and for the first time in too long I realize I’m out of my element. What the hell would she like? And what the hell am I doing?
My phone buzzes and it’s Jason calling me.
“Is that your car I see parked in front of the book shop on Maple Street?”
Dammit. Portsmouth is too small a city. He must be right outside. I go to the door as I talk.
“What about it?”
“Since when are you into books?”
I walk outside and put my phone in my pocket when I see him leaning against my car.
“Since when do you follow me around like a puppy?”
He snorts. “I’m going to the CVS to pick up some Advil. I ran out and I don’t feel right if I don’t carry my ow stash.”
I shrug and wait him out.
“Stop avoiding my question—why are you at the book store?”
“I’m buying a book.” That’s all I’m giving him.
“Who for?”
“Why is it so hard to believe I’m buying a book for myself?”
“Because I saw the flowers and the box of candy in your car and although the candy might be yours, I’m sure as hell you aren’t buying flowers for yourself. Fess up.”
“Fuck you.”
“I thought you said Delaney wasn’t your real girlfriend? Has that changed?”
“No, why would…” Fuck. Now he waits me out.
I shrug. “We’re not a real couple, but why not treat her nice. I like her.” That’s the best explanation I have.
He nods. “I’m no expert, but I wonder what Sabe would have to say. He’s probably an expert by now—he’s more caught up than Chase with a baby on the way.”
“Don’t make a big deal out of this. I need to make sure Coach believes we’re real and PR lambasted me for the video and says they need some pics of me with Delaney to post with their spin on the punching incident. Apparently, the statement they released about it being all a misunderstanding and that no charges were filed didn’t sooth the media’s concerns since they’re looking for a juicy story more than the truth. They’re getting lots of calls about it and requests for interviews.”
It’s not the right time and place to mention that I told Coach that Delaney and I are engaged. I haven’t even mentioned it to Delaney. Maybe I’m hoping the candy and flowers will soften the blow?
Because I have a feeling she’s not going to like it.
Jason blows out a whistle. “You taking her to the event Thursday?”
“Of course. That’s where PR figures we’ll set the record straight with the media.”
“There’ll be plenty of reporters and photographers there—always is.”
I grunt. “I’m going back inside to find a book for Delaney.”
“What kind of book?”
It comes to me in a flash and I can’t believe how I didn’t figure it out right away.
“Poetry.”
When I arrive home,I find her in the office setting up an air mattress with sheets and a blanket. Freezing in the doorway, I question whether I should re-think the gifts. Not that I know what the hell I was thinking anyway.
Maybe to soften the blow of having to perform our couple act at the team event? It couldn’t hurt, but that’s not why I bought the book of poetry. I spent far too long checking out each book until I found one that reminded me of her.
She turns and almost falls onto the mattress when she sees me standing here. That makes me smile.
She frowns. “Are you spying on me like some creeper?”
“It’s not creepy when you’re in my home, Delaney. It’s only creepy if I were staring at you through the window.” I shrug. “Even then, the pirate in me isn’t so sure since we have a thing.”
She flings her hands on her hips, more melodramatic than usual, then brushes a stray strand of hair from her face and the gesture makes her look vulnerable, like she’s at loose ends, somehow giving me the upper hand.
“Well?” She stands her ground staring back at me as usual, pretending she doesn’t feel the pull between us, air mattress in the office be damned.
I stalk inside the room straight at her and I see the flicker of surprise just before I reach her. When I do, I haul her in for a kiss. She resists for a half a beat, more from shock as she melts into me, kissing me back, deepening it, pressing into me until my dick goes from hesitantly interested to full alert.
“Oh my god, why do you feel so good?” she groans into my mouth. I grin and end the kiss with a nibble of her bottom lip.
“You calling me god now?”
She swats my arm and pulls away from me. But that doesn’t dispel my mood. Which is warm and sultry, not the hot and bothered frenzy I’ve experienced before. I have no idea what that means, but I’m rolling with it.
“I have a surprise for you.”
Her expression immediately turns wary. But I take her hand and lead her to the kitchen where I’ve put the flowers and chocolates on the island.
“Okay, but don’t get all cheesy and ask me to close my eyes.”
I laugh. “No cheese.”
I pull her around and stand between her and the gifts, suddenly feeling unsure—and as unlike myself, the pirate, as I’ve ever felt. I watch her blue eyes snap at me and stare, losing myself, and damn if that doesn’t restore my confidence. It’s like I’m jumping back and forth between two universes, the known one and the unknown.
“Well?” This time there’s less bite in her voice as she prompts me.
I step aside and let her see the gifts, gulping back the sudden burst of the unknown, the invasion of unfamiliar… feelings. Fuck.
“Flowers?” Her eyes go wide and for a beat I’d swear I could see pure pleasure in them, but then she snatches them up and turns to me, laughing. “You are so ridiculously cheesy. Don’t ever accuse me of being a cliché.”
I grin back at her, pleased that she’s not throwing the flowers at me.
“Don’t overlook the box of candy,” I say.
She shakes her head and takes the flowers to the kitchen where she finds a tall glass, adds water and arranges the flowers. Watching her take her time with them tightens my chest. This is too fucking weird.
“By the way,” I say. “We’re going to have to move up the schedule on our fake engagement.
She spins around, nearly knocking the flowers over. Then she squints her eyes at me and brings the glass of flowers to the kitchen island and places them in the middle. I watch.
I’m waiting for the reaction. Because I know there will be something. And damn if I’m enjoying the anticipation.
“Why?” she asks calmly as she opens the box of chocolates and pops one in her mouth. I watch her lick her lips as she bites the candy, closing her eyes and moaning. Even though I know she’s baiting me with her exaggerated enjoyment, she has to be the sexiest woman alive.
I clear my throat. “Because I told Coach we’re engaged.”
“It’s a good thing you’re leaving in the morning,” she says calmly. It’s an odd thing to say, but she has a habit of backing into her point and I can’t wait to hear her explanation.
“Why is that?”
“I figure there’ll be less temptation to murder you if you’re not around.” She gives me a frowny smirk, but I know it’s fake.
I laugh and don’t bother resisting my temptation to take her in my arms.
“Your sarcasm muscles are in fine shape, stronger than ever.”
“It’s all that working out I get with you around, giving me so many openings.”
She doesn’t resist me as I wrap my arms tight, holding her against me and my growing dick. I’m waiting for her to drop the hammer on me and push me away. But I’m enjoying the moment while I can.
Her body fits so well against mine, feels so sweet, her breasts crushed against my chest and her arms around my neck, toying with the locks of hair at my nape.
I lower my forehead to touch hers.
“Anything else you need to tell me?” she says.
“Why do you ask that?”
“Because Cherry and Tina told me about the big team event Thursday night. Said it was a dress up affair and if I’m going, I’m going to need to buy a dress and a heads up would be nice.”
“Shit. I’m sorry. I guess you distracted me. I meant to tell you. Of course you’re going.”
“Nice way to ask a girl out. How can I resist?”
“Hey, I bought you flowers, didn’t I?”
She laughs. “That was funny. The chocolates were a good call though.”
My pulse picks up. I don’t know why I was reluctant to give her the book, but this is the time.
“I have one more surprise for you.” I let her go and retrieve the bag, slipping the book out and hand it to her.
“You got me a book?” There’s more excitement than disbelief in her voice and it feels like someone popped a champagne bottle inside me, and all the fizz is spreading through my chest in celebration.
“Not just any book.”
She looks at it, studying the title, then flipping the pages open. “A book of poetry.” She bites her lip, still staring at the pages. “Because you think I’m a poet.” Her voice is shaky.
“Because I know you’re a poet.”
She looks up at me and laughs and flings her arms around me. I lift her and move her into the living room onto the couch.
She kisses me, her tongue flitting all over, driving me crazy. Then she separates our lips, nibbling at mine as she talks.
“Aren’t you going to ask me to sing my song—our song.”
Our song. The words make me shiver. Is it fear or excitement—but not the kind I know all about, something unfamiliar. Something that makes my heart pound in fear.
“Go for it.” The gravelly brave words leave my mouth before I have the good sense to crush the need. Because some foreign need drives me right now as I lose myself in the blue of her eyes, lose all the pirate inclinations I had, that made me confident and strong and invulnerable.
Fuck it all—I feel vulnerable right now. That’s so wrong. And so unavoidable.
She clears her throat and puts some space between us, though we’re still touching, at our knees, our hands and our eyes.
When she opens her mouth and the word and melody flow from her, I’m stunned. My breath catches as she reaches deep and the words tell me of longing and needing and irresistible desire.
She finishes and we sit staring at each other in silence. I have no thoughts.
Fuck me, because all I have is feelings, swirling everywhere and wreaking havoc.
Our silence stretches and I know I should say something, but damn if I know what.
“And the man of few words strikes again.” She tries for a smile. She looks so vulnerable right now—even more than I feel—so I shake off whatever stupor I’m in and tell her whatever I can manage to say.
“There are no words.” I heave a breath. Only feelings. But I can’t bring myself to tell her that. Instead, I reach my arms around her and hug her to me. “You were amazing. Your voice is so beautiful. Like you.”
“Those words will work,” she says as our lips hover close.
I may be confused about what the hell I’m doing, where I’m at with her, but my dick has no problem knowing exactly what it wants. The more I hold her and we stare and kiss, the more my dick convinces me of what we need to do.
“You weren’t going to sleep on that air mattress tonight, were you?”
She laughs. “Now that you mention it…”
That’s all she needs to say before I scoop her up in my arms as she laughs in between kissing me and I carry her to my bedroom, kicking the door closed behind us.
Before I leavein the morning, I give her a kiss while she sleeps.