9. Shane
Chapter 9
Shane
“Are you out of your mind?” Kieran stood in my kitchen, glowering at me.
It wasn’t even noon yet. I’d no sooner crawled out of bed when he knocked on my door.
“I’d offer you a coffee, but I don’t think I want to. What’s your deal, Kieran? It’s too early for this shit.”
Kieran dragged a hand down his face, a telltale sign that he was reaching the end of his rope, but trying desperately to hang on. Out of the three of us, Kieran was the brains. He often called Brodie, our younger brother, the courage. And I was the heart. I had a feeling it was my heart getting me in trouble again.
If this was about Archer, I’d rather let Kieran believe I was thinking with my heart instead of my dick. God, I still ached when I walked. I don’t think I’d ever had sex that good and I wanted more. I hated myself a little for being my own cockblock, but Archer deserved a fresh start.
“I heard you leased the space above the bar.”
And there it was.
“You heard correctly.” I grabbed a mug from the mug tree on the counter and robbed a cup from the coffee pot. Kieran had been appalled at my mug tree when I picked it up at a yard sale, but I’d always wanted one. I didn’t even know why. It was another thing Kieran didn’t understand, but eventually rolled his eyes and let me have my way in peace.
“How much are you charging?”
I hid my grin with my cup and turned to face him. “Probably not enough.”
Kieran sighed. He knew there was no talking me out of something once I made up my mind, and that if I could make it happen with limited impact on my life, I would. I wasn’t a huge risk-taker.
“I’m leasing the space to Archer, Cyrus’s younger brother. He ran a tattoo shop before his business partner cleaned him out. Legally, he can run a business upstairs once he gets his license sorted. I’m going to charge him what he can afford until he gets his business off the ground.”
Kieran’s posture softened and he begrudgingly crossed the room to grab a mug from the tree. His lack of comment on it was another win. “I guess I can’t be too angry about that,” he said.
“You could, but it wouldn’t change anything.”
“I could, but then you’d probably pay him to rent the space. This isn’t as bad as I thought.”
“What did you think?” I knocked my shoulder against Kieran’s. “Did you think I was going to turn it into some kind of above-the-bar brothel? My very own Twinks-R-Us?”
Kieran let out one of his signature belly laughs. “You’re ridiculous.”
“So are you. I know you worry about me giving all my money away—”
“Because you’re always giving it away. Money doesn’t grow on trees, and you didn’t win unlimited funds, Shane.”
“I know that. This is costing me nothing. Archer rents the space for what he can afford. He gets his business off the ground. Once he’s established, he either finds a better space, or he pays a reasonable amount for rent.”
“Is the upstairs even a good choice for a tattoo shop?”
“Archer didn’t have any complaints. He said he could make it work.”
Archer said a lot of things upstairs and I tried not to think of any of them. I couldn’t pop a random boner standing next to my brother. He probably already suspected something. Kieran had a nose for this kind of thing. He claimed that my face was like an open book to him.
“And you’re sure this is a good idea?”
“I’m sure it’s not a bad idea. You wanted me to get a tenant in the space and I did.”
“This isn’t what I had in mind.”
“It’s what you’re going to get.” I shrugged. “I’m not going to go broke, Kieran.”
“Because I won’t let you. If it were up to you, you’d give everything away.” Kieran tried to make it sound like he thought it was a bad thing, but the reality was that he cared as much as I did. He was just more pragmatic than I was. I was the dreamer. Kieran was the realist. Sometimes he had to burst my bubble, but it was only because he wanted me to be able to be a dreamer in as many things for as long as I could.
I let his words roll around in my mind. “I mean, there are worse things to do. As long as I still had The Anchor, I’d be okay.”
Kieran gave me a soft, soupy sort of look. “You’re a good man, Shane.”
“Oh gross, don’t get all mushy on me. It’s too early.”
“It’s noon.” Kieran drank the rest of his coffee in two big swallows.
“Exactly. My noon is your five in the morning.” I wanted to check my phone to see if Archer had texted. Maybe I could offer to help him move his stuff in. I’d love a chance to see him again. Even though things between us had to be professional from here on out, I still couldn’t help the way the memories made me feel.
If I wasn’t careful, Archer could become an addiction. I wanted his touch, his words, the sound of his voice thick with arousal and heavy with approval.
“Are you coming for dinner tonight?” I asked him. The Anchor wasn’t Kieran’s favorite place, but sometimes I could convince him to come for a burger.
Kieran shook his head. “I made plans with Mom. I’m supposed to drag you over there kicking and screaming. She knows Mickey is working tonight.”
Mom ran a women’s shelter that I helped fund. One of the volunteers was a sometimes drag queen named Milo, who knew Mickey. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to see my mom, but I definitely wanted to see Archer more.
“Dinner at six?” I asked, knowing that she was a creature of habit.
Kieran only rolled his eyes at me. “Always is.” He set his empty cup in the sink and pulled his keys out of his pocket. “I have places to be and things to do, but I’ll see you there.”
“That wasn’t vague at all. You’re not meeting with the mob, are you?”
“You’re an idiot.”
I grinned at him. “Always.”
Kieran rattled his keys in his hand. “Don’t blow off dinner. Brodie’s birthday is coming up and I think she misses him more than she lets on. They talk, but it’s not the same.”
“Maybe I should stop funding his globetrotting and make him come home.”
Kieran barked out a laugh. “As if that stopped him before. ”
“I’ll be at dinner. And I’ll see what I can do about our dear, sweet, baby brother.”
Kieran let himself out and I flopped down on my couch. When I won the money, I didn’t want to be an idiot with it and just piss it away on stupid shit like cars and boats and big fancy houses.
I bought a house and filled it with modest, but comfortable furniture. My couch was light grey and it was like sitting on a fucking marshmallow. It had easily become my favorite purchase. Before the money, I’d had an old futon with a lumpy mattress that never stayed on properly.
My couch was selected after an entire day of sitting on couches in furniture stores. When it was just me, and it usually was, I slept on my couch. I liked it better than shutting myself away in my bedroom. The bedroom was a lonely space for me. It represented things I wanted but hadn’t found. Call me a romantic, but I wanted someone to fall asleep next to every night. Someone to wrap my arms around at two in the morning when I slid into bed.
I pulled up the chats on my phone and opened the one I had going with my youngest brother. I thought about messaging him, but called instead. Maybe he’d be more apt to listen that way.
“Hey,” a deep voice, familiar, but still strange after so long just texting, answered.
“Hey, little brother. How’s… where are you?”
“In an airport. I’m heading to my next gate to catch my connection.”
“Maybe one of those connecting flights will bring you this way sometime soon. We all miss you.” I didn’t want to pull the Mom card unless I had to.
“Stranger things have happened. Is everyone okay? Is that why you’re calling? ”
“Everyone’s fine. I was talking to Kieran and missed having you around to team up on him with me.”
“I’m almost at my gate. Give me some juicy gossip from home.”
“I rented the space above the bar to Cyrus’s younger brother. He’s a tattoo artist and he’ll be opening up a shop.”
I left out the part where we fucked first. I didn’t kiss and tell. And even if I did, I wanted to keep what happened to myself. I’d never been with someone who read me so well, someone who gave me what I needed so thoroughly. I’d only had him once and I felt empty knowing once was all it would be.
“Shane?”
“What?”
“Did you hear anything I said?”
I rubbed the back of my neck. “No, sorry.”
“Dude. Are you okay?” The concern in his voice made me feel a little bad. He was supposed to be traveling and having fun doing his own thing. Not worrying about me because I was a mopey asshole.
“I’m good. I promise. I just got up, that’s all.”
“It’s afternoon.”
“You morning people make me sick. Remind me why I asked you to come home for a visit?”
“Because I’m the best one.”
“Keep telling yourself that.”
“You were the prototype. Kieran was the failed attempt at perfection. I am perfection.”
Airport noises filled the background of the call. Announcements about boarding. The murmur of other people talking as Brodie passed them on the way to his destination.
“That’s not how that works.”
“I have to go, Shane. I’m at my gate and my flight is boarding. ”
“Cutting it close as always.”
“I live on life on the edge, what can I say?”
“Come home. At least think about it. I won’t tell Mom I called. If you come, it can be a surprise.”
“I’ll think about it. I have to go.” The call ended abruptly, but I didn’t mind. I was shocked he’d picked up at all.
After seeing that Archer hadn’t texted, I sent him one asking if he needed a hand with the move. I had a couple hours to kill and if I didn’t occupy myself, I’d just end up at The Anchor anyway.
My phone pinged with a reply from Archer.
Cyrus and Marshall got me covered, but thanks.
He sent a happy face emoji after the text and my phone went silent. I shouldn’t have been so disappointed, but I couldn’t help it. I’d hoped he needed my help. It would’ve been a good excuse to see him.
It was probably for the best that I didn’t. I wanted him too much.