13. Kelsey
My determinationto not fall head over heels, gaga, stupid in love with Oskar Olson was being tried. Sorely.
As I traced the line of his jaw in the cool early-morning light, I thought about yesterday. We’d stayed in the house all day, alternating between the kitchen, bath, and bed. Mostly the bed.
He slept soundly, exhausted and sated. His face was boyish when he slept, his mouth pouted a little, and his defined jaw was soft. But looking closely, I saw the lines around his eyes and mouth that had deepened from stress. My fingers played across his stubble.
He was utterly beautiful, so much more now that I was starting to know the man inside.
Falling for him would be… effortless.
His serious and intense nature balanced my optimism. He was focused, yet spontaneous enough to drive north at four in the morning so he could surprise me on a Sunday.
And I tiptoed around calling him my boyfriend.
It wasn’t that I didn’t want to fall in love. I did. I knew myself well enough to understand that when I looked into the future, what I wanted was utterly conventional and I was fine with it. I wanted the husband and the kids and a life filled with love and family and satisfying work.
But I didn’t want to fall stupidly in love with Oskar or with anyone.
When I was with him, I still felt that sense of rolling down a hill without brakes. It had scared me from the beginning because for so much of my childhood, I’d felt utterly powerless.
My parents had left me, and I had no control of that.
My grandparents had taken us away—for completely loving reasons—and I’d had no control.
The idea of handing over control of my heart scared the shit out of me.
I had a lot of feelings for Oskar, and one of them was admiration. He had stepped wildly out of his comfort zone when he moved the US. He’d decided what kind of life he wanted and then gone out and made it happen.
I wanted to do the same thing.
“What happened to your parents?”
Oskar froze when I asked the question.
We were in the kitchen, and he was making coffee on Monday morning.
“I’m sorry,” I blurted. “You mentioned that they died and mine did too, but if you don’t want?—”
“It’s fine.” He started pouring the water again. “It was a car accident. Snowy roads. Nothing… newsworthy. Except to me and Hanna.” He stared at the counter. “I don’t miss the snow.”
“I wouldn’t either.”
“Hmm.” He gave me that soft sound between a hum and a grunt that I was starting to understand meant something like agreement with finality.
I agree with you, but I don’t want to talk about it.
I’d lost my parents when I was seven, and I still missed them in a painful, hollow way. I could only imagine how much worse it would be to lose them as a young adult.
“Is that why you came to California? To avoid snow?”
He looked over his shoulder and smiled, then reached for the filter on the counter and very carefully poured the coarse ground coffee into it before fitting it to the coffee maker and starting it.
He reached for me and sat down in one of the kitchen chairs, pulling me onto his lap. He rested his head lightly against mine before he spoke.
“Hanna left for New York almost immediately, which I hated, but I understood why. My mother’s best friend lives in New York. Hanna needed to get away. She was younger, and she lived with Cristiáne until I moved out here. She was ready for a change anyway and decided that she liked San Francisco.”
“And you?”
He shrugged. “I was in the middle of my apprenticeship, so I stayed and finished. I felt like I needed some experience where people knew me before I made any big changes. Then I went to London for a while. When I felt ready, I got to work on all the paperwork to move here so I could be closer to Hanna. It’s a lot of paperwork.”
And here was the question that I had wondered about for so long. “How did you pick the Central Coast?”
He paused and rubbed his chin along my shoulder, his unshaven face rasping against my skin. “I read an article when I was still in school about the artichoke harvest in Monterey. I was fascinated by the area. And that always stuck with me. I liked how many things could be grown there in one small place. You can grow almost anything on the Central Coast. There’s wine, seafood, ranching, even hunting.”
“You came for the food.”
He smiled. “I came for the food.”
Well, if I was expecting some deep, dark motivation for Oskar’s relocation to Arroyo Grande, I was disappointed. I smiled a little, remembering some of the wilder theories I had concocted over the past few weeks.
“What are you smiling about?”
I stood up. “I don’t know. I think I had this idea that there was some dramatic story about how you ended up in my backyard. But what you’re telling me is that it was all about the vegetables.” I couldn’t hold back my laughter.
He smiled and looked out the window. “I mean, they’re really good vegetables.”
Poor guy. I probably sounded like a crazy person. “I had some wild theories in my head, so it’s good to know it was just the vegetables.”
“Right.” His smile was a little stiff. “Can you get the cream for the coffee?”
“Of course.” I got up and crossed my tiny kitchen to the refrigerator, still shaking my head slightly. He came for the vegetables. I mean, it was as good a reason as any for a chef.
We sat together, looking out over the garden, and Oskar pulled me onto his lap again, which seemed to be his favorite. We drank coffee and chatted about what we wanted to do outside the bedroom that day.
“You’re going to need clothes.”
“That was not in my plan.” He was being stubborn. “We can order delivery if we run out of food.”
I pushed his shoulder with a laugh. “I am a food writer. I want to take you out to eat, and if you meet some of my friends naked, I cannot guarantee your safety.”
“Fine.” He sighed. “I’ll go get my clothes from Hanna’s.”
After he left, I went to the bedroom, straightening the pictures in the hall as I walked. The bedroom looked like a tornado had torn through it, leaving sheets and blankets strewn about. I stripped the bed and changed the sheets, opening the windows to air out the room. Once the bedroom was put back in order and I had cleaned up the kitchen, I went to take a shower.
I’d let Oskar borrow my key, so I knew he could let himself in when he got back. Hanna’s house was apparently only about ten minutes from my own. I had asked Oskar whether I could meet her this weekend, but he made noncommittal noises about how busy her work schedule was. Honestly, I think he really would have stayed locked in my house for the next two days if I had seemed more enthusiastic about the idea.
I was in the shower and trying to work the tangles out of my hair when I heard the front door open and close and Oskar call out my name.
“Kelsey?”
“In the shower!”
I heard the door open and then his head peeked in through the glass of the shower door.
“Are you an utter-privacy-in-the-bathroom sort of person?”
“Showers I’m okay with, but anything else is off-limits.”
“Fair enough.” He walked in. “So, is there still a water shortage in Marin County?”
“There is always a water shortage in Marin County, but you are not getting in here. I want to leave the house today.”
Oskar slid the door open and eyed my naked breasts. “Water conservation is something that we should all be concerned about.”
“Hey.” I laughed. “Hands and lips to yourself.”
“Okay, but they’re just there.” He gave me his best puppy dog eyes. “And they look lonely and sad.”
I gasped. “Did you just say I had sad nipples?” I slid the door shut.
“Okay, they’re not sad,” he said. “They’re quite perky as a matter of fact. But I maintain that they are lonely.”
“Out!”
“Only if I can take a shower after you’re done.”
“Done.” I finished rinsing off, then threw a robe on and walked to the bedroom, tossing a fresh towel to Oskar where he waited on the bed. His shirt was already off.
“You know, we’re already mostly naked,” he pointed out.
“We haven’t had a real meal in over twenty-four hours.”
He stood and stretched his arms over his head, tilting his head to the side and smiling a little. “I’m okay with that.”
Holy shit, he was ridiculously good-looking. And tempting. His arms had these little freckles on them, and his hair brushed his shoulders. His eyes were blue as the Arctic, and he was looking at me like food was the last thing on his mind.
He stalked toward me as I clutched the robe around my naked body. I knew I wouldn’t resist him if he wanted me again. I knew I was weak.
Oskar leaned down, kissed me softly behind my ear until I started to melt, and reached behind me… to grab his duffel bag. He straightened up with a smile on his face and walked to the bathroom to take his shower.
“You better be dressed when I come out,” he said before he closed the door, “or you forfeit clothes for the day.”
The whole townwas quiet and sleepy in the pale midmorning light. Oskar walked next to me, stepping down off the sidewalk and into the street every now and then so we could see eye to eye. I felt happy and lazy, like we didn’t have a care in the world.
In the back of my mind, I took a mental snapshot of Oskar as he walked down the tree-lined streets. The wind would come up, making the fall leaves flutter down around us, and the pale sun dappled through the ash trees.
Most of the shops were closed since they were open all weekend, but luckily, I knew Comforts would be open. “This way.” I pulled Oskar with me. “My friend has a café that’s open.”
“How long have you lived here?”
“Almost five years? I rented an apartment a few blocks away from my house for a couple of years; then I bought my house three years ago, which was a minor miracle.”
“Why a miracle?”
“Houses here are ridiculously expensive. I knew the lady that owned it before me. She was elderly and knew that I loved the house and loved to garden, so when she was ready to go live with her daughter, she sold it to me for a steal. I think her kids were quite angry about it, but she was very sentimental about the place and wanted it to go to someone who wouldn’t tear it down and build something new.”
“It’s a great little cottage.”
“I love it. And it has a nice yard, which is a treat.”
“Yes, you have that beautiful orange tree in back.”
As we walked toward Comforts, I saw Caroline talking to one of the regulars on the patio in front and pouring coffee at the tables. When she saw Oskar and me, she clapped her hand over her mouth and her eyes lit up. She gave a quick wave before she ducked into the restaurant, I assumed to put the coffee down so she didn’t spill on anyone.
I was smiling ear to ear as Oskar held the door open for me. Caroline walked over to greet us, clapping a little. “This is him? This is the guy?”
I frowned. “What guy?”
She laughed. “Stop.” She held out her hand. “You must be Oskar.”
I looked up at my boyfriend. “Oskar, this is Caroline, Felipe’s partner. Caroline, this is Oskar.”
“Her boyfriend,” he added.
“Oh my.” Caroline’s eyebrows went up. “And I’m the business partner,” she clarified. “I cannot compete with Alan because our auras are so different. Also, I do not have a penis.”
Oskar blinked. “Okay.”
I looked at the kitchen door. “Is Felipe on the grill?”
“Yes, yes. Go back and say hello. Do you want to sit at your usual table so we can visit, or do you two want privacy?” She winked at Oskar when she said privacy.
“Usual table,” Oskar said. “I’d love to visit with Kelsey’s friends.”
I left Oskar with Caroline and stepped through the kitchen doors. Felipe stood at the grill, swinging his hips to the radio, so I stepped behind him, put my hands on his hips, and swayed along.
“He-yah, baby.” He turned to kiss my forehead before turning back to the grill. “How are you this morning?”
“I’m doing amaaazing.”
He turned then and looked at me with narrowed eyes. “Damn girl, why you got that just-been-laid glow all over you?” He waved a spatula in front of my face disapprovingly.
I grinned. “’Cause I have company.”
His mouth dropped open and he shouted, “Nuh-uh” before running to the doors, peeking out, and turning back to me quickly.
He grabbed my arm and pulled me close, mindful that the kitchen echoed. “Damn, girl. That little picture did not do that man justice. He is just pure sex. No wonder you look all… glowing. He is gorgeous.”
I giggled. “Right?”
“Did he drive up last night? Did you know he was coming? You didn’t say anything.”
I shook my head. “It was a total surprise. He left after dinner service on Saturday night and drove straight here. Stayed at his sister’s and surprised me Sunday morning.”
Felipe gave me a loaded look. “And let me guess, you two are just now surfacing?”
When I didn’t answer, he busted up laughing.
“Well fuck, Kelsey. I better be making that man some eggs. God knows he probably needs some protein after that workout.”
I punched his arm lightly. “Shut up. The whole restaurant doesn’t need to hear you.”
“Oh please, you think I’m being louder than Caroline?”
“Shit.”
“Better go out there before she gets his entire life story out.”
I scurried out the door to find a somewhat harried-looking Oskar nodding and smiling at Caroline, who had sat down across from him in what looked like an interrogation.
I walked over to Oskar, who scooted out his chair and pulled me into his lap somewhat forcefully. “Kelsey, I missed you.”
“Caroline, are you trying to steal my boyfriend?”
“What? No, I’m just getting all the information.” She stood up and grabbed the coffee carafe. “I have a really good feeling about you two. Oskar has very strong psychic energy, and your vibrations are very in tune. I can tell that you really meet each other on a spiritual level; your chemistry is clearly in synch. That’s so beautiful, you know?” Caroline uttered all of that in a light, rushed way as she filled two cups of coffee for us and seated a party of three that had come through the door.
“You two look hungry.” She winked at Oskar. “What do you want for breakfast?”
I moved to the empty seat and answered first. “I’ll have my usual eggs with some of that corned beef and apple hash if you have any.”
“Of course. And Oskar?”
Oskar leaned forward and looked into my eyes. “What do you suggest, k?reste?”
I glanced at Caroline, who had a hand on her heart as if she was absorbing all our spiritually synched energy like a sponge.
“Um…” I tried not to blush. “All their eggs are good. The crab cakes benedict is excellent. And their pecan challah french toast is amazing if you want something sweet.”
He took my hand and rubbed his thumb over my knuckles. “I’m going to save the something sweet for later. I’ll have the crab cakes benedict.”
“Mm-hmm.” Caroline just nodded and turned with her mouth slightly gaping to walk back to the kitchen.
I turned to Oskar. “You’re shameless.”
He smirked. “Just wanted to make sure she knew who I was waiting for.”
I snorted. “It’s Caroline. She’s a doll even if she’s a little goofy.”
“She said I had very strong psychic energy.”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. “But she says that to everyone.”
He put a hand on his chest. “She was just stroking my ego?”
“Or maybe your psychic energy.”
He shook his head. “My ego and my psychic energy are devastated.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll stroke both of them later.” I winked at him.
He gave me a heated look. “Do you want to eat or have me carry you out of this restaurant over my shoulder?”
“Caveman.”